Sungmin's pov:

i hugged him from behind and rested my head on his back.. It doesn't matter how much i'd tried to stopped my tears from falling, how much i forced to sob silently so he won't hear it,but i failed, i can't control my self anymore. I just can't...

He heard my sobs and turned around and hugged me tightly "shhh.. Don't cry.. What's wrong?" he said and smiled sweetly to me, but it's painful for me because of his sad eyes...he still has the guilt in his eyes whenever he looks at me.

"it's nothing, just stay in this position for a while"

"hmm.. So you missed my hugs?"  yes, i missed it..and i will... I want to hug you as long as i can, cause when you leave there will be no one hugging me like you, there will be no one loving me like you.. There will be no one. You are everything i have donghae. i'd make sure no one make you sad. I'd sacrificed everything for you to live, i would fight against everything to keep what belongs to you safe,even if it means i have to break my pride. But now I'm going to loose you as well...

How much is life cruel to me? Why everything changed in this way? Is it because of that childish love i had with kyuhyun? They told me to let go of my feelings, they told me that it was a dangerous love,an untruth love,they told me that i would end up the hurted one but i never cared what others say,i was really blinded by kyuhyun's love;maybe i should've listened to them,now i know everything they said was true,maybe i should've let go of my love...But no, i will never regret any of that,even if it turned out the worst way it could be.if i hadn't gone through all that stupidity called 'love', i wouldn't been able to have you. my son,the one person that is left for me to love and to be loved by,which is leaving me by the way.

Kyuhyun was in love with me but his feelings changed; what did i do wrong? i did everything i could,only because i wanted to be with him, i pretend to be woman to be his one and only queen and keep him for myself,leaving my pride to let him know that i will always love him. I throw away my name and family to act like a real princess for him so no one could doubt about us. but then one day...that doomed day...

donghae pov:

HE is my mother. but not so many people are aware of his manhood;it's because my father wanted him to act as a women so they will be allowed to get married and so it became a passion for my mother to do this for his so called"love"and thus he started acting as a future queen which brings her to the present queen. both my parents were once truly in love,i remember how i crawled in between them at midnight after having nightmares and my father would hold both me and my mother in his warm and strong embrace;he would put me on his shoulder and hold my mother's hand and the three of us would walk around the palace happy and without any worries,this is how secure and loved me and my mother would feel by being with my father but not anymore...it all changed 10 years ago when i was only 7, on that doomed day when they found out that i had a sickness which was related to the way i was born(because both my parents were men).my father gave a lot of money to my doctor so he would close his mouth and won't reveal my mother's secret. both my parents were under alot of pressure because they didn't know when exactly was i going to leave them...ten days..ten week..ten month..ten years...but i was going to leave...my body was getting weaker day by day and i traveled to a lot of countries for medical treatment,but no,there was no cure,life was leaving my body little by little(it still is)...and that's when my father's attitude changed,his love changed,the love in his eyes changed,the security and warmth of his embrace change;all changed and these changes were only towards my mother because he thought my illness was his and my mother's fault and i don't know why but he thought by being cold towards my mother their love will vanish and maybe they would be punished this way. but this is exactly where he went wrong, that time was exactly when my mother needed him and his love. but he wasn't there. he even...

"hyung you're ready?" minho came all of a sudden and got a bit shoked by seeing my mother crying in my embrace. "i guess i came on a bad time"

"o no prince minho come in; i was just having a little 'mom-will-miss-you' moment here." my mother let go ofmy hug and started to wipe his tears off his cheek with  a tissue. "don't forget to come to me and say goodbye before you leave donghae"

"sure mom,how could i leave without saying goodbye"

"how your father and his love left"  he whispered and again tears were forming in his eyes but he didn't want me to see them(though i did) and turned to minho whith a fake smile on his face, "don't forget to remind him prince minho."

"sure your majesty"

sungmin pov:

as i was going to my room i stopped as i saw kyuhyun. but he walked pass me without even looking at me. is this how much you hate me kyuhyunh? do you think our love is the reason why our son is leaving us? why did you give up on our love? why did you regret being my love and husband? why did you start punishing me and yourself with a stupid method? and again why didn't you let me go when i was going to leave?

flashback:

"We will leave" sungmin said while he had the sleeping donghae in his arms.

"no you can't. you have to take care of donghae ...as long as he needs caring" he said the last part with a low tone so he could avoid showing his trembling voice to me.

"i wouldn't leave donghae here,i will take him with me"

"what? do you think i will let you take my son? no way. and besides,you're not only a mother, you're now the queen of this country" kyuhyun was raising his voice.

" only a mother and queen,what about you? what am i to you? do i still exist for you?" tears were forming in sungmins's eyes. he expected kyuhyun to say something in return but he didn't so he continued"i can't bear this anymore. i can't stand you avoiding me. i can't stand the way you go around like i don't exist. i can't stand you pretending to be my beloved husband only in front of other people. i just can't...." now he was crying his heart out and it made donghae wake up and start to cry too.

"mom why are you crying... Dad please stop mom's tears like when you did before...please"

"son go out of the room and i will send your mom to you when he stopped crying" kyuhyun got donghae from sungmin's arms and handed him to one of the gaurds who were standing behind the door and told them to put donghae in his room. and when he came back to his room he turned to sungmin,but still didn't look into his eyes.

"stop crying and go to him"

sungmin knew he couldn't change anything and the fact that he could leave was also impossible so he gave up and went to donghae's room.

"mom i'm really sorry. i'm really really sorry." donghae was crying in his mother's embrace.

"why my little baby? why?" sungmin said while tightening his hug and donghae's back.

"if it wasn't for me and my illness, you and dad would've been together."

"no my son,no,don't ever say such things. me and your father still love each other,it's just we are facing some little problems so do not blame yourself,got it?" sungmin lied although he knew donghae was smarter than this.

"don't lie to me mom. don't. i know you don't want me to feel bad,but know this, i will always be sorry to be the reason of you and dad's breakup. always".

"oh my baby..."

"so you promise you won't leave here?"

"i promise love,not until you are here."

...........................................................................................................

"son be carefull when you're there. you know nobody should find out who you and your brother are" kyuhyun said to donghae after giving him a goodbye-hug.

"yes father.take care" donghae said and came toward me"mother please be really careful and take care of yourself, i will be in touch with you and...and.." he couldn't finish his sentence.

"no my love, i won't change my mind...i did as i promise,didn't i?" i knew what donghae meant when he didn't complete his line.

"you did mom. but please think again" donghae said with pleading eyes but i hugged him and whispered to his ears that
"it's time to leave donghae,both you and me" and then i broke from the hug and started again"don't forget to tell me about everything you experience through this journey. mother will always love you.take care" be strong my son,don't give up on anything especially your life.please be stong for me,for yourself.

"i will mother and i'm sorry,like always" donghae knew he couldn't change my decision. he sat in the car and minho came to me after having his goodbye session with kyuhyun,his father;
" i will take care of both myself and hyung,don't worry your majesty,so please don't cry" minho said when he saw the tears falling from my eyes, which i really didn't feel until he told me.
I guess i should be happy that there is someone besides donghae that care for my feelings.'you don't know the reason of my tears minho dear' i thought to myself. "please do as you say prince minho" i gave him a little hug and after that he wen't to his mother....my donghae's step mother...