# 10

Magician
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There are apparently three group chats now. One is with all of them. One is without Hyukjae. One is without Donghae or Hyukjae.

Leeteuk told him this at the gym. He kept chuckling. The Parks needed one without Hyukjae before. Because they'd arrange his surprise appointments. They realized later. They should make one with Hyukjae. So he knows who's picking him up when.

After adding Donghae... they realized they need one without them both. Because the family sends useless messages to each other. Mrs. Park sends too many. To her son. To her husband. About everything she asked them to do. That they haven't done. There are strange texts. With no context. From Mr. Park. Because it's related to whatever's happening. At their own house. Or in person. 

They do share updates about Leeteuk's grandmother though. With all.

Hyukjae would normally visit her. At this time. While Donghae came to work out. But Hyukjae couldn't today. Grandma Park has a doctor's appointment. Donghae was going to skip gym. Stay with Hyukjae. But Hyukjae had convinced him. To leave him at home.

So he came here with Leeteuk. He's getting a ride back home.

"Is she... okay?" Donghae asks. "Hyukjae's been worried about her too..."

"Grandma? Yeah..." Leeteuk slowly reverses. Sets off. "She has good days... it's just sometimes... if she's confused and we can't do anything to help her... it's hard for my parents. I think Hyukjae doesn't get what's happening to her, so he gets scared. My dad's tried to explain it to him -- but yeah, she's... you know. She's okay." He stops at a red light. "How's our magician?"

Donghae laughs. "He's great."

"Oh, he asks me so many questions and makes me talk for hours--"

"He just wants to learn, Teukkie, he wants to know... about whatever he can."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, Hae," Leeteuk says. Laughs. "I don't mind, it's just the things he asks -- he's funny, that's all."

"Things he asks? Wait, what does he ask you about?"

"Oh, everything now. I don't even realizing it's Hyukjae I'm rambling to. He used to be so respectful about it -- Teukkie, I'm sorry if it's wrong of me to ask, I don't want to make you uncomfortable, you don't have to tell me -- and then he'll follow it with all his questions anyway."

Donghae laughs. Leeteuk put on a small voice. He pouted his lips to copy Hyukjae.

"But Teukkie, you can tell him to stop if it's too much, he'll understand!"

"Oh, yeah, I know. I don't mind, Hae, I really don't, and to be honest, I think he knows I don't mind even when I pretend to, so he's comfortable with me and I like that. I've got another little brother to look after and that's... cute..."

"Another little brother?" Donghae says. Scoffs. "Who else have you got? Most of your friends are your age, Teukkie--"

Leeteuk looks at him. His eyes are wide. Shocked.

"Excuse me? What the hell are you, then? Who did you think I was talking about? And then getting jealous about it, too?!"

Donghae bursts out laughing. His face feels red.

"Did you forget all the years I took care of you?" Leeteuk goes on. "I wiped your tears and fed and clothed you through college like a baby!"

Donghae fans his face. Wipes his eyes. Keeps giggling. "I'm sorry... I gave you a hard time..."

"I can't believe you'd say that," Leeteuk mutters. He turns into Donghae's street. "I'm telling my parents -- oh, hey, would you be able to come see them at dinner? It might be nice for Hyukjae to see grandma if he's feeling worried, too."

"Oh, that's a great idea. I think we're free!"

"Really?" Leeteuk seems happy. "If grandma's frustrated after her appointment, I'm sure Hyukjae would make her feel better--oh!" Leeteuk's grabbed Donghae's arm. He laughs. "One funny thing he did ask me about is what he should do to pay us back for all the money we spend on him!"

"Oh, he actually asked you that?" Donghae says. Surprised. "I didn't think he would--"

"Wait, did you tell him to ask that?"

"No, no, he just got worried once he realized it -- he thought you're all going broke because of him."

Leeteuk laughs louder.

"Oh, he's adorable," he says. "I told my dad yesterday and he was shocked. He'll probably talk to him about it."

"W-What do you think he'd tell him?"

"Huh? Why do you look like that? He'll tell him we're happy to do anything for Hyukjae, obviously, me included! I don't know if he realizes how helpful he is with my grandma and how grateful my parents are."

Donghae blinks. Slowly smiles.

 

------

 

Hyukjae loves Leeteuk's grandmother. She was the first person to treat him nicely. Show him care and love. So she's very important to him. But Donghae needed this reminder too. That Hyukjae's just as important to her. To Grandma Park. His reappearance in her life... has made her slightly better. It has made the Parks' lives a bit easier too. This is how Hyukjae supports them. Even if he's not aware of it.

The Parks do love Hyukjae. Donghae's seen how they treat him. But Hyukjae's already giving a lot to them. So they must want to take care of him in return.

Donghae enters his place.

He doesn't know if this matter's still bothering Hyukjae. The magician's always so busy. So excited. About one thing or another. But Donghae hopes Mr. Park does remind Hyukjae of it. So that Hyukjae can feel how special he truly is--

Donghae freezes. Stares.

Oh, he's special alright.

Hyukjae hasn't seen him. His eyes are shut. Donghae's in complete awe.

The chairs and couches have been pushed. An area in the middle of the living room has been cleared. Hyukjae's sitting there with legs folded. His hair strands ruffle softly. Because...

There's a big floating circle around him. Of books. Pillows. Some of Donghae's pencils. Sheets and sheets of paper...

Donghae looks at his desk. It's near the wall. It's farthest from Hyukjae's circle. But the ends of his sketchbooks quiver. His pens vi

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sujul33
Wanted to add some Hyukjae POV.

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OdetteSwan
930 streak #1
Chapter 19: He's trying to find his purpose now that he isn't restrained.
Thank you so much for the update.
yanHae15
141 streak #2
Chapter 19: Oh! Hi! It's been a while! I miss them!
But Hyukkie is sad and struggling. I hope he doesn't see what they're doing for him as something negative. They do it with pur intentions and so, if there's any problem, it will be better to communicate. He shouldn't keep everything to himself 🥹🥹
fullofwish
1540 streak #3
Chapter 19: Hyukjae is struggling with so much. Seems like he feels bad whether he keeps it to himself or shares it, so it's understandable he's not sure what the best thing to do is. He and Donghae are really so considerate of each other, to a fault. Half of the issue is that they just want to please the other person at the possible expense of what they themselves want. Not sharing the things that are unpleasant. Hyuk now has more awareness and is worried that's what Donghae is always doing, but he is doing it too by not really sharing his true concerns. Worried Donghae will feel more responsible or burdened to find a solution for him.

Still think they can work through things best together, though. At least, Hyukjae seems more lost and afloat when he retreats into his lonely mind and the insidious draw of more powerful magic between the difficult memories and realizations. Even though Hyuk is better at self-regulating than he was when he would literally transform to protect himself whenever overwhelmed or threatened, he still needs trustworthy people to keep him grounded and remind him to tread safely, and Donghae has been that constant person he needed for a while. Maybe Hyukkie needs to express the things he needs that are different now, if that's the case. Like Donghae being more open with his own wants and needs instead of only prioritizing Hyukjae.
HelenDamnation #4
Chapter 19: Well from the sound of it, it may be the only parenting he got growing up was the time with Hazel. The rest of the time there's a whole lot of trauma he needs to recover from on top of his entire world basically having disappeared.

He's very helpful and considerate. He seems to be having trouble that realizing that is actually worth a lot. But he's at the age, isn't he, based on your notes, to be thinking that if he doesn't do something big then none of it counts. It would probably help if somebody explained to everyone in this story that constantly treating someone like they're fragile and about to break into a million pieces is going to be destructive to their mental health, even when you mean in the best way possible. :-)
ldh2013 #5
Chapter 19: Everytime Hyukjae felt threatened, he retreated into becoming a mannequin. It's no wonder that everyone, especially Donghae, has been trying really hard to make sure he feels safe. Being constantly worried over can be trying and Hyukjae appears to be feeling guilty about it. Adapting to the current world isn't that easy. Technically, Hyukjae doesn't have that much experience living (not being a manniquin). I think his only "work" experience was ever as a helper but the people around him now don't really "need" him to help them.
HelenDamnation #6
Chapter 18: So Hyukjae feels like he doesn't belong where he is, which is natural to have to process...but then in MM&YxMagician, he finds out there are DonghaexHyukjae couples everywhere he looks...so maybe that'll help? Help him feel he's where he's supposed to be?

Edit: I really, really like how you're showing some things many people experience that rarely get talked about in fiction, if ever. Like the sense of grief and loss when you get old enough to realize that you can't actually read all the books there are or learn all the things, much less do them fast enough. Or the fact that there's a lot to do with where you really can't fully imagine how it feels until you try it, which can create some shocks, both good and bad ones -- I've never seen that covered in conventional publishing (or at least only the ic surprises, never the reverse). I've been reading fanfiction for less than two years, but I'm constantly impressed at how fanfiction authors just go right ahead and cover what is missing from print media that really needs to be said and portrayed.
kiwicolada
1601 streak #7
Chapter 18: And here I'm sitting and thought that Hyukkie already coped amazingly with his past. I really thought he was fine living in the present, with Donghae and the Parks. That he's still suffering inside and feels lost in place is sad to read. Thinking about it, he lost so many time while he was surviving as mannequin during the centuries. And when we think twice there must be a century old between him and Hae. No wonder he feels out of time. But he did so well and everyone made sure to tell him this. But sometimes it's normal to feel this way, not belonging to this place and time when we think where Hyukjae's coming from.

I'm amazed that Hyukkie could feel Hae's biggest fear. That he could turn into a mannequin again. This shows how strong their bond is. Even the century old . A deep and strong love. As if they're destined to each other. Like it was his fate to sleep as mannequin until he could meet Donghae. Aside from all the horrible experiences Hyukkie did in the former century, I like the idea that Hyukkie and Hae were meant to be. But the deep sadness in Hyukkie is hard to handle for Donghae. The thing is Donghae can do what he wants, he can't heal Hyukjae from this sadness. Not alone. And deep inside there will always be a tiny piece of sadness that will reminds Hyukkie's that he's a surprise from another century.

It's been a while a chapter went so deep. Thank you for writing and sharing this ❤️
fullofwish
1540 streak #8
Chapter 18: So curious (worried) about what Teukie is worried about. Hope it is just because Hyuk sent him some possibly weird or sad texts before and not anything more.

The way Hyukkie's feeling is understandable. He's always so bright and energetic, but the more he grows and learns the more he comes to terms with reality. How could he not feel out of place? He's literally from the past, with magic no one else (that we know of) has, and has a lot of uncertainty still. It must feel so lonely and hard, no matter much Donghae and the Parks love and take care of him. It's no one's fault. It will just take time and patience for Hyukjae to figure things out and really find his place. To not be so harsh on himself for not being good at everything right away. As much as it breaks Donghae's heart to see him upset and struggling, it's a relief he's opening up about this.

Kethryveris
#9
Chapter 18: Hyuk, s'inquiète et se sent mal, j'espère que Hae va vite lui rendre sa joie de vivre. Merci 💙
kiwicolada
1601 streak #10
Chapter 17: Hyukkie is such a sweetheart. All concerned about the safety of Donghae's work. Even kisses have no priority in that moment. What a cute weatherman. And Donghae is all happy and forgot about that horrible night before. This is how their trip should be. I like this chapter a lot ❤️ Thank you for sharing and a belated happy new year ^^