The moment Lu Han’s lips touch Minseok’s he panics.

The idea of kissing him felt pretty great two minutes ago, when Minseok was making all those nice speeches about how he’s gonna miss him terribly. But now that he actually dared to do it, he feels like his stomach is about to turn upside down. He doesn’t even know if he actually feels the texture of Minseok’s lips or if he’s imagining it all. The softness and the plumpness, the slight dryness of Minseok’s lower lip. It must be all in his head only.

Minseok doesn’t even kiss back. Of course he doesn’t, it’s not like he knew Lu Han was going to kiss him! And it’s not like he can kiss him back, even if he wants to… Which of course Minseok doesn’t. He doesn’t like Lu Han the way the ghost likes him. Which is one of the reasons why he is currently panicking. He should have just taken his feelings to the grave. Oh, why did he need to reveal them to Minseok at the last second? 

Wanting to backpedal quickly, he pretends he’s feeling frail and awkwardly falls through Minseok. He hopes it’s enough to keep Minseok from realising that was his sad attempt for a goodbye kiss. Even after he hits the floor and pretends to feel weaker than he is, Minseok stays still. Only after maybe five seconds, which feel eternity for him, does Minseok recover from whatever state he was in and hurries to Lu Han’s side.

“A-are you alright?” Minseok asks, his hands hovering over Lu Han. 

The ghost peeks just enough to see the pink dust on Minseok’s cheeks. Alright, so maybe he didn’t manage to cover up the kiss entirely. 

“S-sorry, I felt really weak all of a sudden…” He mumbles, trying his hardest to pretend that he really just lost his balance back there. Judging by the surprised and embarrassed expression on Minseok’s face, this time he is successful.

And it’s not entirely a lie either. He does feel weaker than a moment before. He doesn’t think he’ll have the strength to stand up from the floor again. He tells as much to Minseok who nods and then lies by his side on the cold floor.

“What are you doing?” Lu Han asks, when he and Minseok lie side by side, looking at each other.

Minseok reaches towards him with his hand and, somehow understanding what the other wants, Lu Han also moves his arm. Their hands meet somewhere in between their bodies.

“I’m gonna stay here, so don’t worry. You don’t have to be alone,” Minseok smiles. 

Lu Han wishes he could kiss him again.

Despite wanting nothing more than for Minseok to stay by his side, Lu Han shakes his head. “You don’t have to do that! Go home and get some sleep instead…”

Minseok only rolls his eyes and starts talking about TVXQ, asking if there’s a song from them that he would like to hear. Or if there are football videos he wants to see. 

Lu Han shakes his head at everything. He can feel his cheeks getting less transparent when he answers, “Just talking to you is fine.”

His words make Minseok look rather taken aback, but he soon recovers and flashes him his sweet gummy smile. Oh, how he’s going to miss that… 

“Then, let’s talk,” Minseok replies.

And talk is what they do. They talk about Lu Han’s childhood, about Minseok’s junior high years, even about their baby years. Minseok shows Lu Han his baby pictures from his phone, something he’s always refused to do before. Lu Han gets punched in the head one final time too, when he makes an inappropriate joke about baby Minseok. Apparently it’s not okay to say you want to eat the baby version of your friend because he’s so round and cute…

Minseok doesn’t stay mad at Lu Han for too long though. Soon they are chatting again. This time they talk about EXO and Minseok debuting. Lu Han wishes he could have seen Minseok’s debut stage at least, but he can’t have everything.

“You’ll do well for me, right?” He grins. “Maybe you can even dedicate your debut stage to me.” It’s obviously a joke, but Minseok gets that serious look in his eyes that makes him regret his words.

“I’ll do it. A great debut stage for you. Maybe you can watch me from above.”

Lu Han hums. “You think I’ve been behaving well enough to end up above?” Then he smirks. “Maybe I’ve been a bad boy…watching you in the showers and everything.” It’s pretty flirtatious, but he’s already kissed Minseok and somehow gotten away with it, so he decides to push his luck further one more time.

“You just had to remind me of that…” Minseok mumbles red faced, but for once he doesn’t hit him.

He forces himself to laugh. “Sorry, somehow I remembered how mad you got at me when I first told you that. You can be pretty scary when you’re mad.”

“I don’t even get mad often,” Minseok replies, averting his eyes. “I don’t know why you always manage to ruffle my feathers.”

“Maybe it’s because we have a special bond” He singsongs. 

Minseok rolls his eyes, but Lu Han sees him mumble “maybe.” It makes him feel all warm and fuzzy.

He can’t tell how much time has passed since Minseok found him in the supply closet, but slowly all the noises outside fade away, so he thinks it’s way past midnight. Minseok has tried to yawn in secret a couple of times, but he managed to catch that anyway. The other tries to stay up for him, but eventually, after there’s a lull in their conversation, Minseok closes his eyes and soon after he hears his breathing even out. 

Lu Han feels himself growing sleepy too, only he knows that once he falls asleep he won’t wake up ever again. He probably only has a couple of hours at best.

So he uses his final moments doing what he likes to do the best — staring at Minseok. The other always looks so peaceful when he sleeps, making it impossible for him to turn his gaze away.

Back when he was still alive, and still in high school, he had been chasing after girls. Even when he started his trainee career, he had been checking out all the pretty trainee girls. But now…maybe if Lu Han was still alive, he wouldn’t look at girls anymore. He looks at Minseok’s round face and wishes he had enough strength to touch his cheek. 

Maybe if he had still been alive, Minseok could have been the one for him.

With these thoughts in his head, his eyelids finally close and he can feel the last of the strength leaving his body. 

---

The next time he opens his eyes, he’s surrounded by beeping machines and gasping for air.