“UGGHH THIS IS KILLING ME!” you had yelled, your voice ringing in the apartment. You had run to grab your phone and sat at the table. 

And now you sat in front of your phone, still turned off, nibbling your nails. It was such a bad habit, but this was eating you inside. Your mind said He’s either at his schedule, or he’s sleeping, he won’t even read your message. Even if he did, he probably won’t reply because you’re so weird. 

But your heart said Check twitter. Now. 

So here you sat, too scared to turn on your phone. Eventually your heart won over your mind, and you turned it on. Your heart was right, there were two new messages from Kiseop. TWO?!

Your heart thudded loud when you opened the inbox. You hoped to God Jinkyoung wouldn’t come home. She was also a Kissme, but she was in love with Eli. Correction: She wanted to Eli’s . If she found out that you were in contact with THE LEE KISEOP, she would throw a grenade at you. For once, you wished you knew Bruno Mars. 

You read his message, and a smile formed on your face. He was so sweet. He didn’t think at all that you were weird, he was happy you were being open.THANK GOD. 

You smiled to yourself like crazy, as you finished reading the first message. This can’t be the real Kiseop. Was it? If it was, he seems even better than I thought. 

He said you were different. To him you outstood the thousands of fans. You felt your heart flutter at the thought. 

But you squealed when you read his second message. 

“A pretty girl like you should always be smiling to show off her cute dimples and pretty eyes ;)”

Did he go through your pictures? You suddenly felt self conscious. Did anyone post an embarrassing picture of you? You were too scared to check, but you went to tweet something. 

“Honestly, best day of my LIFE.”

Your fellow KissMes spam tweeted you now. 

“@________ it’s because of kiseop oppa right? ^^”

“@________ YOU’RE STILL SO DAMN LUCKY!”

“@________ omg he even followed you , wow <3” 

You FELT so damn lucky. Out of thousands, you. You, you, and only you. 

Kiseop was there for you. He said so himself. 

He was there for you.

He.

Was.

There.

For.

You.

You walked around the apartment smiling madly to yourself. You still didn’t know how you would reply his inbox. You didn’t know what to think. You wondered if he ever saw you, would he come over to talk? Or would he pass by like he didn’t know you? You walked around like a madwoman, going crazy. When you passed by the hall mirror, you stopped and remembered what Kiseop had said in that second message. 

“Please don’t always be sad, a pretty girl like you should always be smiling and showing off her pretty eyes and dimples. ;)”

You smiled in the mirror. Your slight dimples hollowed out, and your eyes sparkled. You ended up practicing your smile there for awhile, not noticing the clock and time passing. You heard the door open. 

“Yeah Ken, this is my dorm. Yah, _________-ah, what are you doing? You aren’t pretty, just saying.” You heard Jinkyoung’s annoying voice. 

Well, Jinkyoung, U-KISS Kiseop said I was, you thought.

You rolled your eyes and turned around. Jinkyoung looked wasted, and she was dragged a rather hesitant looking Ken into her bedroom. You were surprised when you looked at Ken. He was tall, and very handsome. He was well built, and had pretty, big eyes. he looked innocent, trying to stop Jinkyoung from pulling him into the room. 

“Hi _______, sorry for disturbing. Jinkyoung, I really think I need to go.” he said, acknowledging you, and then trying to break free of her tight grasp on his wrist. 

“Don’t you want to stay and play for awhile?” she asked him groggily, tracing one of her fingers down his body. Yupp, she was wasted. He pried her hands off him, and backed away. 

“No, I need to go run some errands. I’m sorry, I’ll see you around.” He said, and went out the door, after giving you a quick wink and smile that Jinkyoung didn’t notice. 

“Yahh, Ken! What’s that supposed to mean? Are you breaking up with me? KEN!!” she yelled after him, but he had gone. She turned back to you, saw the leftover mug pieces, and glared at  you, furious. 

“I TOLD YOU TO CLEAN UP THE MUG. NOW HE’LL NEVER COME BACK AGAIN.” she yelled, then stormed off to her room and slammed the door. 

You stood there for about a millisecond, and then ran to your phone. You clicked open yours and Kiseop’s direct messages, and started typing. 

“Omg my retarded roomate just brought in a decent guy, but he totally rejected her request to ‘play’. She came home wasted. I can’t believe people drink. Like it’s so disgusting, the smell of something like beer is gross, and the taste is even worse. And it makes you do stupid things. If you drank at a party, you could consider yourself screwed. LOL. Haha, the guy’s name was Ken. I’ve never seen him in my life, but he’s really handsome. He winked at me and smiled before he ran away from Jinkyoung. Oh she’s my roommate by the way. lol. Anyways, yeah, drinking is bad. I wonder if Ken drinks? Because though she was drunk, he seemed perfectly fine. I hope he doesn’t drink. That would be horrible. Enough about me, what about you? :) ps. why am i different? ;)” you typed rapidly, and sent. You didn’t feel retarded or anything, you felt confident. It’s funny, how something could be so weird but comforting at the same time. If Kiseop actually would take the effort to talk to you, who else would you need?

** IN SOUTH KOREA ** 

Kiseop was having a great time at a party, over at Brian Joo’s. He was dancing around, beer in one hand. For awhile, he had forgotten about the ‘different’ fan on twitter, and was really getting a move on with a girl at the party. All of a sudden his phone vibrated. Through his haze of alcohol, your name repeated in his mind, and then his heart skipped a beat. He walked away from the girl, who was clearly upset, and checked his twitter message. Sure enough, there was a message from you. He laughed at how random it was, then he stopped at one line. 

“I can’t believe people drink. Like it’s so disgusting, the smell of something like beer is gross, and the taste is even worse. And it makes you do stupid things. If you drank at a party, you could consider yourself screwed.”

Kiseop stopped dancing, and he looked at the beer in his hand. 

If she doesn’t like people who drink, she wouldn’t like me. He thought. 

And with that, he threw out his beer, and headed for the exit. 

“Yah, Kiseop-ah, where are you going?” A guy yelled over. “You could get easy babes here!” 

Kiseop looked to see that the guy was being grinded by the same girl who was dancing with him. And they were making out. 

Fake world, he thought, and left without a word. 

“Soohyun hyung, can you please come pick me up? I’m done.” he texted Soohyun, who was at Jo Kwon’s house, a couple of blocks down. He didn’t drink or party. 

_______ would like him, he thought. 

“Coming, give me two seconds.” was Soohyun’s reply. 

Soon enough, Soohyun pulled up, driving Kiseop’s Hyundai. 

“Yah hyung, who gave you permission to use my car?” Kiseop asked laughing. 

“Well, I thought you’d be drunk and you wouldn’t notice, haha.” he said jokingly. “But that’s weird. Why aren’t you drunk? Aren’t you normally the last one who leaves, having to have Hoon carry you back or something?” 

“Well, it’s nothing. Just didn’t feel like partying.” Kiseop said lowering his eyes. But leader Soohyun knew each of s well. 

“Kiseop-ah, what’s wrong?” he asked concerned. 

“Nothing, it’s just….” Kiseop pondered on whether he should tell Soohyun. Would he ridicule him like Eli did? Or would he support him in this?

“You can tell me.” Soohyun said confidently. Kiseop sighed. 

“Would it be wrong to say I’m starting to fall for a fan I’ve never met and barely talked to?”