CHAPTER 7

"Don't touch me! I'm not her sister! You can't be my sister!" The child screamed. "No! I don't want her!"

"Please," Her father pleaded. "She has no one. You should give her a chance."

"No!"

The man let her daughter go to her room. Groaning as he faced the adopted child with his late wife's mother. The woman smiled and held the child close.

"It's okay, I'll take care of her."

***

A soft knock echoed to her room. The sun is yet to rise. Bora rise from her bed, yawning as she made her way to the mirror to see herself. Plump face, she really should start working out again. She made her way to the door once she tied her hair. Opening it to the woman wearing a mud-colored vintage dress with a cowboy hat and boots. That's some kind of fashion, Bora thought. 

"Good morning," The woman greeted, removing her hat. "Grandma said to help you vaccinate the calves today."

"Where's Dami?" Her response as she's sure it was Dami's task. 

"The other town, helping grandpa Son with his produce." She shrugged. 

She hummed and proceeded to wear her peach hoodie and faded jeans. She noticed Siyeon's stares when she faced the mirror. Her reflection showing amusement as she looked at her. She felt a tingling sensation inside her stomach and immediately organized herself. She did mind Siyeon's stares but she pretended not to. She gets up and followed Siyeon. 

It's been four days since their little spat happened. Four days since she realized she cares more than she thought. Siyeon's head wound is already closed but is still patched by a bandage. She still cares for her and reminding her to take her medications. She bumped to Siyeon’s back, unaware that the latter stopped. She peeks and saw the front of the kitchen doorway. Siyeon gave her a side glance before smiling and turning around. She took a step back, her shoes squeaked with her action. 

“What do you want for breakfast?” The woman wearing dress asked. “I’ll make it for you… and grandma Kim.”

Oh, she thought she will be soloing the blessing but she forgot her beloved grandmother. She coughed, obviously removing her silent embarrassment before looking at Siyeon’s face. 

“Something light,” She described. “A sandwich maybe?”

Siyeon nodded in agreement before walking to the kitchen, leaving her in the doorway. She instantly remembered the old lady and get to her room. She was sleeping soundly, unbothered by the clattering entrance of her daughter. Bora placed herself near before waking her grandma. She nudges her a little, not too long before the old lady opens her eyes. Bora greeted her a good morning which the old lady replied with one. She guided her to sit, pulling lightly because of the already frail complexion. She held her grandma’s arm to avoid her falling over as she wears her slippers. They left the room and the scent of meat being cooked was all over the place. 

It was the first time for Bora to smell the breakfast like this. Dami only wakes her when she already finished everything. The smell somehow triggered a memory from the distant past, making her reminisced. Her mother’s back facing her as the woman from her memories kept her around so she can watch her cook. It will never come back, the sad truth Bora accepted a long time ago. 

She placed her grandmother to the sit, facing the fridge. The woman having a thong greeted the old lady with a good morning. Siyeon wearing an apron made her look like a housewife, Bora thought. She snooped around the fridge to find something to drink. Her grandmother in her white nightdress requested a cup of warm milk. She prepares it and accidentally bumped to Siyeon when she hazily turned. The woman smiled at her before turning to her dish. She’s halfway finishing the sandwich which Bora finds appetizing with her skills. The cup clinks in contact with the table. Bora now placing herself parallel to her grandma and just watching Siyeon. Another minute was wasted but Bora doesn’t seem to mind. Watching Siyeon might become a new hobby of hers. 

Everything was the usual—Siyeon taking the lead when it comes to talking—and the relatives nodding. It was a good breakfast and Bora enjoyed it a lot than before. Once they’ve finished, Bora got to her room to get her kit. It is stocked and only used for the animals in the barn. She also has other patients—a dog from a little child and a cat from the widowed lady living near the municipal house—but rarely go for checkups. She grabbed the necessaries and head down, meeting Siyeon after her farewell from her grandmother. 

“Calves are aggressive, do you think you can hold them?” Bora’s thoughtful concern when they started walking. 

“I can, petting them at least.” Siyeon bobs her head and smiles at Bora. “Don’t worry too much.”

“I’m—” Bora coughs when she realized she’s getting riled up. “I’m not…”

Siyeon hummed, agreeing with her. Bora let out a sigh and throw her embarrassment away. She shouldn’t pry too much, Siyeon decided to help her and she’s grateful. For the past few days, they are beside each other. Siyeon even slept in her grandma’s house when she insisted. The woman might have remembered her expression when she declined the first time and what happened after that’s why she accepted. Even if that is the case, Bora does not want to think about it. She feels like she’s pushing Siyeon around too much but she justifies that it was the latter who keep insisting. Like today too, they’re together. 

The double door of the barn creek, giving natural light for the animals. Bora turned off the fluorescent light inside as the sun is enough to light the whole place. She placed her kit atop a stool, rolling her sleeves before crouching down to the calf. She caressed it before she got her syringe, Siyeon now holding the calf. She did it quick enough and the other woman divert the calf's attention elsewhere. The vaccination ended quickly, mainly because Bora doesn’t want any casualty, not for the calves but for Siyeon. There is still a chance that her wound might reopen and bleed. 

It was already in lunch when they’ve finished, Siyeon helping her to throw trashes as they cleaned up. She was about to get her kit when she saw Siyeon already holding it and heading out. She wants to speak but just let the woman be as she remembered their conversation before. Being too concern will make Siyeon uncomfortable, she took note and jog towards the latter when she called. They’ve returned to the house and saw Dami already preparing for lunch. 

“Why didn’t you show up?” Bora asked as she moved towards the sink, washing her hands. 

“I just got home,” Dami answered. “Did you want me to show up?” 

Bora just rolled her eyes at Dami whose mocking her. The woman in her black and white checkered flannel kept teasing her for the past few days. She might have had noticed her change of atmosphere around Siyeon because she noticed herself. Dami is sharp, Bora knows. She’s somehow comfortable as she doesn’t see the fondness of Yoohyeon with Siyeon with her although she spent a lot of time with the earnest woman. And also, Bora’s thinking changed. She began to measure the closeness of a person with Siyeon using Yoohyeon as the peak. She doesn’t know when did she started but she knows Yoohyeon’s relationship with Siyeon irritates her. It was something she did not expect as she found Yoohyeon a good source of information because of her openness. 

“Good afternoon.” 

Bora heard the front door opening and checked who visited. It was the very person who she’s just thinking about. Yoohyeon tugs Siyeon’s wrist as she playfully converses with the woman. She removed her eyes from them and head to the fridge to get some water before slamming the fridge door too hard. It caught Dami’s attention, it made her sigh.

“You’ll pay for the repair expenses,” She started. “If you’re jealous just get a punching bag.”

“Why would I be jealous? And why punching bag?” Her serious question, not getting Dami’s already blunt words.

Bora saw Dami’s right brow rising and did not think any of it. She just saw her spiced up her dish and stopped talking to her. By now, she’s already used to it. Dami’s words also, sometimes don’t make sense to her. She sat at the stool and the rustles nearing caught her attention. It was her grandma, going to the kitchen to get some water. She greeted her grandma and informed her that she and Siyeon already finished vaccinating the calves. Her grandma sat parallel to her.

“I heard a thud, what was it?” Her grandma asked, looking at Dami. 

“Your granddaughter is a brute,” Dami blunted which earned an exasperated gasp from her grandma. “She just punched the fridge.”

Ah. Now, she knew why Dami told her to get a punching bag. Does she react that brutally? It was also new to her. She was so used to be passive about every kind of affection and reaction. 

She saw countless animals die, owners crying for them. If she will be asked if there’s a difference between an animal dying and a human? She will answer no, there is no difference. Everyone mourns for different reasons, the most common is the loss of loved ones. She felt it a long time ago and doesn’t want to experience it again. Felt mourning in her early days as a veterinarian and grew accustomed to accepting that not everything can be fixed, not everything can be saved. Her work leaves countless experiences to stimulate her, she chose to numb herself to others. Especially her feelings. That’s why it’s quite new for her to feel like this. Like moving her body in the stimulation her emotion gives, like minutes ago. She never thought something like this can happen in an uneventful place such as this town. She never really thought.

“I did not,” She protested. “The door slipped in my hand a little.”

She heard a grunt that came from Dami. The woman lied, she can too. It left her grandmother hanging. If not for Siyeon who already finished her conversation with Yoohyeon, their silence won’t stop. Her grandmother uttered no more, same with the two of them, and let Siyeon talk. Bora doesn’t know but she found Dami’s antics irritable. She never heard her address her properly nor do they even talk that much but she can’t tolerate her lying like that. She needs to talk to her or hear her out if she has a problem with her. 

The afternoon came, the sun already hinting its rest. Bora made her way to Dami’s room. It will be her first time knocking in the woman’s room because she’s never in her room most of the time. One, two knocks and she heard a scrambling inside. Dami revealed herself, the opening of the door is just enough for Bora to see Dami’s stature and nothing more. The woman gave her a questioning look, she remained frozen in her place.

“What?”

“We need to talk.”

“We’re talking now.”

She clicked her tongue and let out a sigh. She can’t tolerate her sassy any longer. 

“About what you said earlier,” She started, her arms wrapped around her chest. “What do you mean about that?”

Dami’s brows furrowed, thinking unoffensive words to explain. She doesn’t want to point out Bora’s Ph.D. degree and diss her for not understanding her own emotions.

“You like Siyeon.” Bora nodded with that, she sighed. “You like her more than a friend.”

“No,”

“Yes,” Dami corrected. “You’re old enough to realize it. Don’t make me spell everything for you.”

“How can you say that?”

“Do you want me to kiss Siyeon in front of you?” A little test.

“Why… would you do that?” A dumb question. “No.”

“I don’t want it too so sort everything yourself,” Dami groaned. “I’m busy.”

“Can I come in?”

“No.”

“Yes.”

Look how the table’s turn. Bora now aggressively breaks down Dami’s defense, caught her relaxed defense. She landed on the wooden floor, easing her as she gets up. Such a small room and doesn’t have anything except for her bed, closet, a desk, and hand-drawn illustrations hanging on the wall. Burnished floor, oak plank walls, and a little window in front of her desk. When she peeked, she saw an unfinished work—drawings of animals some even have colors which put her in awe. Dami sprint towards her desk, hissing as she covered her precious treasures. 

“Those are amazing,” Bora complimented, pointing at the now-kept illustrations. 

“…Thanks. Now, get out.”

Bora shrugged her shoulders and agreed. She kicked her out of the room but with one last suggestion.

“You should show it to some publisher or something in that field. I know it will be passable as kid coloring books or something.”

It was a compliment that Dami refused to accept, although it’s true that it is for the kids in their little town to color on. Bora gets out and head towards her room, pluming herself in her bed and squealing out of frustration. She tries so hard to understand herself and her feelings just to end up being directed by a woman younger than her. She was in denial. She won’t lie about that. But considering Siyeon is a woman—a perfect wife material to be exact—how can she just steal her away from all those people who were more apt than her. Does she like her romantically or Dami just said that platonically? Dami never said that she like Siyeon but she did say to sort everything on her own.

Her legs flap on the sheets. She’s being riled up with her thoughts, nothing like her before. She has to sort her feelings up and being confused will not help. Bora needs to have solid proof that she likes Siyeon romantically. It made her all tingly and grab the pillow to cover her head. She stayed like that for a while, memories now flooding her mind. She removed the pillow till half of her face, now looking at the ceiling.

“Picture…” Bora let out, remembering her family portrait in Siyeon’s room. 

Why does she have it? A question she keeps asking herself, afraid to ask the owner of the house. That threw her off the loop, the tingly emotions inside her dying. She completely removed the pillow from herself, not tracing the light with her hand. The shadow of her hand fills her face as she dazed, thinking of what-ifs. Then, she remembered her father. It’s been three days. She wonders if her father expected her to call in those days. She got up and wore her hoodie, she needs to phone him, to catch up. She gets some change in her already worn jeans and head out. 

The squeaks of her shoes are hearable, the soft creaking of the wooden stairs echoed in the lifeless house. It was already cold; it made her shiver. She walks following the dirt path. Bora doesn’t want to disturb Dami now, and it’s not like she will after she saw what she’s doing. It might also be the reason why she looks so tired always—Dami draws until late at night and wake up early—she’s so hard-working. 

She hit the concrete path, nearing the small market. There are only a few folks inside, no one seemed to have noticed her. No young adults also. The chirping of the crickets is now hearable. Once she entered the booth, she punched the numbers and waited for a few seconds before she got an answer. She told the secretary to lined her in her father’s office which the secretary immediately did.

“Hello, sweety. How are you?” 

He sounded tired, maybe because of too much work, Bora thought. That’s why she doesn’t want to leave the city in the first place. She knew that it was hard managing two vet clinics with only one vet. Bora even proposed to close one in the meantime but her father refused and now he’s stressing. What was done is done though.

“I’ll be visiting in two weeks, to check on you and mother and…” Bora found his stop a little odd.

“And?” She asked and heard a sigh on the other line.

“…The animals. I’ll check the ranch too.” Her father reasoned.

The sigh was a bit heavier compared to the first. Is he stressing out over the ranch and animals? But her grandma is still healthy so why would he think that? Bora can only think of what-ifs as her father continue to inform her about some trivial things. 

“I hope you’re having a good time there.” Her father hoped and she replies.

“Yes, I’m enjoying myself. I met people my age. Siyeon too. I—" 

“Siyeon?”

“Yes, she helps me a lot. And she keeps grandma entertained. She’s a talker and she accompanies me every time.” 

Somehow, she found assurance in her own words, and got her father interested in who she meets means a lot to her. It was the first time she openly talks about someone to her father because she was reluctant if he will have an interest. She’s happy that he took interest in a person she talks about.

“Is she with you right now?” Her father asked, in a more serious tone than ever.

“No, not right now. She was a singer in a pub so I guess she’s there and getting ready.” Bora nodded her head as she held the telephone close to her ear.

“Oh, okay.” Her father agreed. “Isn’t it already dark there and you are alone? Shouldn’t you go home?”

“Yeah…” Bora agreed. “It was nice talking to you, Dad. See you in two weeks.”

Her farewell before she hanged the telephone. Bora removed herself from the booth and smelled the dewy grass. It was a cold and gloomy night. She chuckles and placed her hands inside her hoodie pocket. 

Now, she feels like getting a drink or two.