She couldn’t believe her ears. She had to have misheard or misunderstood something. She couldn’t have heard those words come from Seulgi.

“In case you’re wondering, your hearing is fine.” Seulgi replied to her awestruck expression.

“Kang Seulgi.” That was all Wendy could say at the moment.

“Son Seungwan.” She shot back easily.

“I don’t understand.” Wendy muttered. “Where did I slip up? What did we do wrong?”

“Nothing?” Seulgi gave her a confused look. “Sometimes relationships just end. It doesn’t have to be because someone made a mistake.”

“But why would she end the relationship?”

“Wannie, it was for the better.” She could sense that Seulgi was trying to be reassuring, but it wasn’t working. “We’re still friends so it’s not all bad.”

“I don’t- How are you so calm about this?” Wendy exclaimed in frustration.

“Maybe because I’ve already accepted it?”

“Well I haven’t!” Wendy blurted out without thinking. The force of her words took Seulgi by surprise. She could see her friend’s eyes widen a fraction before she took a step back.

“When did this happen?” She asked.

The taller girl’s brow furrowed. “We made it official last night, but if you’re including the break, then it’s been about a week?”

“Oh my god... and you didn’t think to tell me?” Wendy ran her hand through her hair.

The entire week, she had been texting Irene without a clue of what was happening. Seulgi must have seen the messages too, but she hadn’t said anything.

It annoyed her that she hadn’t seen any signs. She had sensed the doubt from both sides but there hadn’t been any concrete decisions yet.

Wendy couldn’t help but think about whether she could have done something to prevent the breakup, or repair the relationship somehow.

“Hey,” Wendy looked up from her thoughts, “stop blaming yourself.”

“I’m not-“

“I know you well enough to guess that your brain would be working overtime to figure out if you could have helped the situation somehow.” Seulgi said calmly. Wendy hated that she had been spot on, so she chose to keep quiet.

“I didn’t want to draw any conclusions until I was sure, so I’m telling you now that our arrangement is officially done. We can probably pick a time to explain things to her in future, once the situation settles down.” She looked way less upset than Wendy would have thought she’d be. Irene had been her most sought after goal. She was the reason they even started speaking. Yet, she was handling the situation as though Irene hadn’t meant anything.

Somehow, the thought irked her.

Shouldn’t Seulgi be more motivated to fight for her relationship?

“Seulgi-yah, we’ve worked so hard over the past few months.” She sat down on the edge of the bed. She needed time to process everything. Nothing was making sense. She thought back to the events over the past few weeks, trying to wrack her mind for any indication of how things were going to go.

“It can’t have been for a relationship that ended over nothing.”

“I’m sorry that you feel that way, Wannie. But preserving that relationship wouldn’t have made either one of us happier.” Seulgi looked guilty now, which wasn’t what Wendy wanted. She didn’t want to be telling Seulgi how she should feel.

Wendy knew she had no right to feel betrayed. It wasn’t her relationship to begin with. Furthermore, if Seulgi said it was alright, she should be able to accept it as such. Yet, she had put in her own time and effort as well, so in a way, she did have an investment in the relationship. She was reluctant to let go, of the relationship she had fought so hard for; of Irene.

“I just... can’t believe you’re throwing all of it away.” She looked up at her again. “Are you absolutely sure you don’t want to try again? I can help you write something to convince her.”

Seulgi folded her arms. “Seungwan, while I appreciate the concern, I can assure you that neither I nor Irene-unnie made this decision lightly.”

Wendy bit her lip. Maybe that was too insensitive. Seulgi probably didn’t want to hear that. “I-I know that...”

“I would have thought that as my best friend and the one who’s been here since the beginning, you’d be the one to support my decision.” Wendy knew she had overstepped; Seulgi was hurt and it was her fault.

“Seul, I’m sorry-“

Her apology was cut off abruptly.

“You know, you were wrong before.”

She was almost too scared to ask. “What are you talking about?”

Seulgi’s smile was painful to look at.

“You can get burned by touching a flame, even if it’s for a short period, and even if you provide sufficient oxygen.”

“Oh Seulgi...” Wendy exhaled. The analogy sounded useless to her ears now. “I’m so sorry. It was stupid of me to say that.”

“It’s okay... you weren’t wrong about everything else.” She sniffed once. “I actually need to apologise to you too, Wannie.”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“I’ve been so focused... on myself, my relationship, my own wants, that I haven’t been a good friend to you.” Seulgi wiped edges of her eyes before she met Wendy’s gaze steadily. “It took me until just now to realise that I’ve been caught up in trying to be a good girlfriend that I completely missed your feelings.”

Wendy froze. Seulgi didn’t know what she was talking about. She had to be bluffing.

“W-what?”

“It all makes sense now.”

“No, Seulgi-ya, you’re not making any sense.”

“I was so blind to it before, but now...” Seulgi trailed off, looking more serious than Wendy had ever seen her. The next moment, Wendy felt Seulgi take her hands. “It’s you, isn’t it? You’re the one that’s been in love with Irene-unnie.”

She tried to pull her hands back, but Seulgi’s grip was firm. Her eyes were gentle, seeking to understand, but it made Wendy feel even more guilty. She broke eye contact and focused on the corner of the wall behind Seulgi.

“Wan-ah,” Wendy’s heart broke a little bit more at the nickname. She had never intended for anything like this to happen. Her friendship with Seulgi was everything to her. “It’s okay if you are.”

“Seul...” Wendy pleaded weakly. She couldn’t do that to her. Even if Irene was as confused as she was about how close they had become, it wasn’t in the cards for them. “I can’t...”

She closed her eyes and felt a warmth engulf her body as Seulgi wrapped her arms around her. The other girl’s hands were rubbing soothing circles on her back.

“We’ll be okay, Wannie.”

Wendy wanted to believe her.

“You know, I learned that moths die while flying through a flame because they want to make it to the light on the far end of the flame.”

“Is that so?”

“Their eagerness ends up causing them to die and they die while chasing something they believe in.” Seulgi recited. Wendy blinked and stared at her, wondering if her friend had been replaced by an alien. “It’s kind of sad, but at the same time, it’s nice to have something to believe in.”

Wendy’s laughter started small. It trickled out of her like water leaking from a cracked jar, before it grew stronger.

She looked to Seulgi, who was watching her with a content and peaceful smile, and felt herself return it.

They would be alright.

“So, why did you decide to help me?” She asked as they were clearing up. “You didn’t even like unnie.”

Wendy paused in the middle of wiping the table. She hadn’t really thought about it. The whole arrangement seemed so long ago, despite it only having been a few months.

“It’s because everyone deserves a chance to be happy.” She said honestly.

Seulgi giggled. It was a lighthearted sound that Wendy loved to hear.

“I should have expected that kind of answer from you, Wan-ah.” She commented, as she took the plates from her and transferred them to the sink. “I think you can benefit from your own advice.”

Wendy waved her off with an eye-roll. That wasn’t what she had meant at all. Seulgi, however, seemed unfazed at her lack of receptiveness.

“I mean it though. If you really believe that everyone deserves a chance, then you should give yourself the chance to be happy as well.” She pointed out. “It would be rather hypocritical of you, otherwise.”

“Where did you learn to be so wise?” Wendy conceded with a groan when she realised she didn’t have a counter for that argument.

“My best friend is a great teacher. It would be impossible not to learn something after having the privilege of being her sole student for the last few months.”

Wendy shuddered in mock disgust at how cheesy that line was, which made Seulgi burst into laughter again. They continued an easy banter as they washed the dishes. It was as though the heavy conversation hadn’t happened at all. For a moment, Wendy could pretend nothing had changed. However, she knew that once she stepped out of the house, reality would set in once again. The conversation was far from over, but for today, this was enough.

This Seulgi was different, Wendy observed as they chatted over the sink, from the one who had first approached her in the hallway. Her eyes were sharper, her poise had an innate confidence that couldn’t be replicated in anyone else, and her thoughts had also matured.

It was a Seulgi she had no doubt who would be able to find her own happiness in future.

~~

Things took a turn after that. How could they not?

After some discussion, Seulgi and her agreed that although Wendy no longer needed to text Irene in place of Seulgi, both of them should maintain their access to both Kakao accounts until they came clean to Irene, just in case something happened. It was Seulgi’s request that they tell her after the showcase, so that whatever happened, it wouldn’t affect the dance team and the other relationships around them.

Until then, they were to keep status quo and update one another as usual.

Wendy didn’t think it would be much of an issue. Since she began preparations for the fundraising project, Seulgi had been too busy to text Irene.

Seulgi was focusing her energy on her upcoming fundraising project. The dance troupe had a yearly showcase which would mark the final performance of the academic year. It was usually the biggest event and as the head of the committee, Seulgi was part of the main organising team. As a member of the graduating batch, Irene was part of the main performance team. Hence, their interactions had been sparse.

As a non-member, Wendy had become Seulgi’s sounding board after major committee meetings because she felt guilty whenever she had to reject a proposal. Many of the suggestions were either dance related or craft related. Wendy herself had suggested they do a bake sale since it was the easiest way to attract customers. However, the problem with those ideas was with budget and time allocation.

It had taken a week before Seulgi finally collapsed on Wendy’s bed one evening and exclaimed with relief that they had gotten the approval from their supervisor to go with their proposal.

According to Seulgi, Irene had been volunteered to be part of the baking team. Wendy recalled that Irene could cook, but baking was another matter entirely. She considered texting Irene to ask if she needed help, but decided against it eventually.

She hadn’t texted Irene since the day she found out about the breakup. Irene hadn’t texted her either, which made the split seem even more real. The relationship wasn’t even hers, but she still felt like she had experienced a breakup.

To make matters worse, she still didn’t know how to face Irene, which meant that texting her was probably a bad idea.

Irene knew she was Seulgi’s friend. Hence, there was a possibility that she might feel awkward spending time with her. Starting a conversation with her had been difficult before, but now it was impossible.

She had been scrolling casually through her old messages one afternoon when suddenly, a call window with Irene’s picture popped up on her screen.

Her first reaction was to nearly fling her computer off the table in shock. She assumed she had accidentally pressed a voice call, but she distinctly recalled that her cursor wasn’t near to that option. The only possibility was that Irene had called her.

She allowed it to ring for a few seconds before she finally clicked the green button to answer.

“Hello?” She spoke hesitantly. There was a mass of conversations taking place in the background. It then occured to her that maybe Irene had called her by mistake. She had moved her cursor towards ending the call when she heard a soft voice.

“Seungwan?” Maybe it was because she hadn’t heard Irene’s voice in a while, but hearing her made her body react instinctively. She sat up straight and started adjusting her hair until she remembered Irene couldn’t see her.

She was supposed to speak.

“Y-Yes?” Great. That went well.