It was Wheein’s birthday. 

It was also the first social gathering were Moonbyul and Hwasa were showing up together as a couple. 

It’s been months since the last time they were all together. Both Moonbyul and Hwasa feared that their presence at the party could make things awkward, specially since they knew Solar would be attending, things could go wrong very quickly. They haven’t talked since the breakup months ago, which is why Moonbyul had decided to back down on showing up to the party, deciding to treat Wheein for brunch instead and give her a really nice gift to make up for it.

Wheein had refused of course, claiming that they were all adults and sooner or later they’d all had to face each other and deal with the awkwardness of the situation, also it was her birthday and she wanted all of her friends at her party, they owed her that much for disappearing from her life the first weeks of their relationship. 

As much as they hated it, she was right, the owed her that much.

So, with all the dread of the world, there they were, standing at Wheein’s apartment door waiting for someone to let them in.

Moonbyul notice the brunette was fidgeting.

M: Hey, she said calling her attention.

M: It’ll be fine, she said while linking their hands together. I should be the nervous one not you, she continued trying to ease the tension, she is my ex girlfriend after all.

H: I know is just, she paused gathering her thoughts, Solar-unnie and I weren’t close at all but still, I was the one who made you broke up, I’m the side piece, the other girl. She expressed her true feelings.

M: Hey! Stop that right now, she said pulling on the brunette’s hand to make sure they were facing each other. You have to know that’s not true, what happened between us back then was only the kick I needed to realize what I truly wanted, she paused looking directly at the brunette before continuing, you. 

Hwasa didn’t say anything still feeling conflicted.

M: Look, she took a small breath, I can’t say that today will go smoothly and everything will be okay, but what I can tell you is that whatever happens I’ll be there right next to you. We’re in this together remember? She kissed the palm of their joined hands. 

H: Together. 

Right on time Wheein opened the door to let them in. 

___________________________________________

To say Solar was dreading coming to the party was an understatement. 

She didn’t want to come and she had express that loudly but Wheein had begged and begged and begged her to the point of exhaustion forcing Solar to say yes. 

After the break up things had been hard to say the least, Moonbyul was a big part of her life and not being with her was not an easy thing to get used to, luckily her friends had never left her side through it all. They had been nothing but kind and supportive to her, calling her to know about her day, bringing food over to make sure she ate and showing up to her house to make sure she was okay. She was grateful for them, she really was, they made the process less hurtful. 

Nevertheless, it was till nerve-racking and overall stressful to face your ex girlfriend for the first time after so long, especially after hearing that said ex girlfriend had already started dating, Wheein can be a blabbermouth. 

God, what am I doing here? 

Am I  even ready to face her? 

I don’t want to know who she’s dating, it’s not like I still have feelings for her I just don’t want to deal with all of it, specially not on Wheein’s birthday. 

Well, I promised Wheein and I’m already here so might as well get it over with. 

I walked in and was immediately greeted but Selgui and Irene who were sitting in the living room couch chatting with a bunch of people, it was crowded party, apparently Wheein knew many people. 

I looked around and didn’t see her, I sighed in relief. 

That’s gives me time to think what I’m going to say to her. 

I was pulled away from my thoughts by Irene complementing my shirt and then starting a conversation with me. 

45 minutes later I excused myself heading upstairs to the restroom.

 After washing my hands I exited the bathroom and intended to walk back my friends when I heard her voice. 

I stopped frozen. 

The voice came from the kitchen on my left. I walked slowly and peaked to see if it was actually her and surely enough, there she was.

Moonbyul, my ex girlfriend.

Her hair was blue now, it suited her. 

She looked good. 

Peaking a little more I notice she wasn’t alone, someone was with her, her new girlfriend probably. I only caught a glimpse of long brown hair. 

Is that?...

Hwasa? 

Wheein’s best friend?

I didn’t know her well but she’ll sometimes hang out with us back then when Moonbyul

and I were dating.

I didn’t know she’d be here... it made sense though, she is Wheein’s best friend.

M: This isn’t mingling. I heard her say.

M: We’re basically hiding out in the kitchen, c’mon, we have to show ourselves sometime. 

We? 

H: I know baby, I just wanted some liquid courage before seeing them again, she said mixing a drink for herself.

M: For half an hour? She asked sarcastically. 

Baby?

H: Let me drink this and then we’ll go okay?, she said pouting. 

Why was she pouting at Moonbyul? 

M: Fine, she said rolling her eyes with a soft smile on her face. You know I can’t say no to you. 

Solar’s eyes widened.

Could it be? 

She saw Moonbyul tried to take a sip from Hwasa’s drink but being stopped abruptly.

H: Byul-a no! She exclaimed grabbing the drink from her hands. This has pineapple juice in it.

She’s allergic to pineapples.

H: You’re allergic to them, you can’t drink this.

M: It’s not fair, she said annoyed, here you are mixing drinks and I can’t even take a sip. 

H: Fine, she said poring her drink down the dishwasher. What would like to drink? She then asked.

M: Mmm, Id rather taste this.

Solar had to cover to stopped any sound from coming out. 

She just saw Moonbyul lean forward and kiss Hwasa.

Her heart began to ache. 

So she’s the girlfriend.

But when? How? 

Those two weren’t even friends before. 

Solar felt a mix of emotions after witnessing her her ex girlfriend kiss someone else. 

Hurt, sadness, discomfort.

Ache. 

With everything she just saw still processing in her brain, she bumped into Wheein on her way back to the living room. 

W: Solar-unnie! Enjoying the party? She asked cheerfully.

S: Yeah, it’s fun, she tried to fake a smile. 

W: What is it? She asked concerned written in her face.

S: It’s nothing, forget about it, she tried to dismiss it.

W: Tell me, she demanded.

Solar let out a sigh.

S: I just saw Moonbyul...

W: Oh, was all she said.

W: Did you talked? She asked

Solar shocked her head.

S: She was in the kitchen I was walking by when I  saw her. 

W: Was Hyejin with her? she asked with curious eyes.

S: Yes actually, are they...? 

Wheein nodded in silence 

S: Wow.

Solar was stunned.

That’s a lot to process.

S: Since when? She asked Wheein.

W: A while, she answered, but that’s not my story to tell, she paused breathing in, I’m sure that when you two finally talk she will tell you. 

Solar breathed out.

S: I supposed...

Solar’s mind was going a million miles per hour. 

W: Unnie...

Wheein tried to called her attention.

W: You know she really cares about you. 

S: What? She asked confused.

W: Moonbyul-unnie, she clarified, she really cares about you. You know she was the one that made us visit you all the time after the break up? Telling us your favorite foods and all of that to make sure you were taken care of. 

What? 

Solar’s eyes widened in disbelief.

That can’t be true

 Why would she do that? 

She closed her eyes shaking her head again.

S: Why are you telling me this? She asked feeling her eyes began to water. 

Wheein sighed sadly.

W: I don’t want you two loosing what you had.

S: She has a girlfriend Wheein... 

W: I know that, she said with exasperation, I just mean you two were good for each other, I admired your friendship, you were each other anchors, she stated looking directly into my eyes, and even though you’re not romantically involved anymore doesn’t mean you can’t be friends, right? She said sounding hopeful.

S: I don’t know Wheein, she said looking down at her hands. There’s still so much up left unsaid between us, I don’t know if I’m ready to have her in my life again. She said honestly. 

W: I understand unnie, but promise me you’ll try to work things out with her? She asked me with pleading eyes.

S: I’ll do my best, was my answered. 

I’ll really try. 

___________________________________________

Party went on without a hitch after that, mostly because every time solar caught a glimpse of dark blue hair she’ll run off to another room, avoiding any interaction. 

It’s was dark already and Solar really wanted to leave, she felt emotionally drained and physically tired from running around all night. So she managed to sneak off from the party to call a cab and finally go home. 

She was waiting outside when she heard the door opened. 

Please don’t be her 

Please don’t be her

Please don’t be her 

M: Running away? 

It was her.

Damn it.

Solar turned around and there she was, the person she had been trying to avoid all night. 

S: Hi, was all she could muttered. 

M: Hi, she smiled at her. 

Don’t do that. 

Her heart was racing.

M: Are you ok? What are you doing outside all alone? She asked concerned.

S: I’m fine, you don’t have to worry. I’m just leaving now, she was trying to end the conversation.

M: Do you need a ride? My car’s here I can easily drive you.

S: That won’t be necessary I have a cab coming.

M: But it’s kinda late and my car is just down the street, I really don’t mind driving you, she started walking towards me. 

S: Don’t. I stopped her by raising my voice. 

She looked distressed.

S: Look, I paused to calm my breathing, we don’t have to do this. It was a mistake from me to come here when I’m clearly not ready to see you again, so please just don’t. I said firmly. 

I saw the pain in her eyes.

Where is that damn cab?! 

I can’t stand this anymore. 

M: Solar I... she began talking.

S: You don’t have to say anything. I am glad you’re doing well and I heard you’re in a relationship, I force those words out, and I’m happy for you but I still need time. 

To process the fact that you’re no longer mine. 

M: I... I’m sorry. She said sadness dripping from her voice. 

S: You’ve clearly moved on but I’m still mending myself so please, give me some time.

M: I will, you won’t see or hear from me I promise! she said in a rush, but can you please just let me drive you? Just to make sure you get home okay, I’ll drop you off and that’s it. We don’t even have to talk on the way there. She was begging.

Solar felt conflicted. 

Being trapped in car with Moonbyul was not how she envisioned going home, she didn’t want to spend more time with her knowing it would only hurt her even more then she’s already hurting but she also knew that the blue haired girl wouldn’t back down until she got what she wanted which was driving her home.

So, she reluctantly agreed. 

After telling her where her apartment was they drive in silence, Solar was grateful for that. 

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Moonbyul’s phone light up signaling a text message, the name My Lion with a red heart appeared on the screen. 

Right...

Hwasa...

S: How long have you been together? She couldn’t help but ask.

Moonbyul was taken aback by her answer.

S: You and Hwasa, how long has that been going on? 

After a few seconds in silence she responded.

M: Almost three months. 

S: Three months?!. Wow, you’re fast, she said bitterly.

M: Hey, she heard her complain. That’s not fair.

She sounded hurt.

Solar wanted to apologize.

S: I know, I’m sorry, she said apologetically. Is just a surprising that’s all.

Moonbyul just hummed.

They didn’t talk for the rest of the drive.

...

S: Well, this is me, she said seconds after arriving at her apartment.

S: Thank you for driving me, you didn’t have to have but thank you, she said unbuckling her seatbelt.

M: You’re welcome, she said softly.

Pushed out of old habit, Solar found herself leaning forward and pressing a small kiss to Moonbyul’s cheek, eyes widening and heart stopping after realizing what she had done.

They were close now, nose almost touching, she could feel Moonbyul’s breath softly blowing on top of her lips, her scent had reached her nose and Solar felt like she could start crying over how much she had missed this, being close and intimate with someone, being close and intimate with her.

Her lips started traveling down, searching for the ones she had spent so long kissing before.

Just one kiss.

A hand on her chest stopped her.

M: I can’t, Moonbyul said voice wobbling, I have…

It felt like a bucket of cold water had been dumped on Solar’s head.

What was she doing?!

Trying to kiss Moonbyul when she knows she's with someone else?!

What's wrong with her?!

She couldn’t breathe.

S: I’m sorry, was all she could muttered. I’m sorry. 

And then she exited the car and ran home. 

__________________________________________________________________________

Breakups are hard yall...

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