Seoul University —— 2020

“You know what I was thinking about?”

Haeun lifted her head from the book she was reading and looked over at Mark. She was watching their soccer practice, well, more like sitting on the bleachers and catching up on readings. Mark had split from the team to run over to her, picking up his water bottle.

“What?” She asked. 

He sprayed the drink into his mouth and caught his breath before patting his face with a towel, “Isn’t it weird that we always remember the Joseon lifetime first?”

“This is what you’re thinking about when you’re practicing?” She deadpanned. 

He grinned, “I’m a multi-tasker. Anyways, think about it, we always remember that lifetime first. Before any of our other memories come back, it’s always that one. Why is that?”

She set her book down and tilted her head at him, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I never thought about it before. I mean, can you remember anything before that life? When I try to think back, the furthest my memory can go is to the Joseon era.”

“Same. All the lives after that come in a blur but that was the one is always so clear in my memory. Why do you think that is?”

She thought it over, “Probably because it was when Taeyong and I first met.”

“Lee! Get over here! We’re starting!”

Mark waved at his team before dropping his towel and water bottle onto his bag, “That must mean that particular lifetime is more important than the rest."

-----

“You should try to be their assistant coach.”

Haeun’s head snapped up when Taeyong sat down on the bleacher next to her. “Hey, what are you doing here?”

“Jaehyun told me that Mark was at practice so I figured I’d find you here.” He said with a smile. 

Her heart flipped, “You were looking for me?”

“Yeah and I brought orange slices for the team.” He joked. 

Her snicker turned into a full-on laugh when Taeyong pulled out a giant container filled with the fruit. He opened it and offered it to her. She smiled and took a piece. 

“How was the hangover?” She asked with a raised brow. 

He glowered, remembering waking up with a pounding headache, “It’s been a few days and I still think my head is pounding.”

“Lightweight.” She chuckled. 

He scoffed with a smile giving away his annoyance. He sometimes hated himself when he thought about how he had snapped at her all those weeks ago. Now it seemed impossible to get mad at Haeun, “You like acting tough but you wouldn’t last in a room against Haechan. That freshman can drink an entire bar under the table.”

Her heart always felt happy around him, like a flower that bloomed under his smile.

“Why were you looking for me?” She asked, closing her book and looking at his profile. 

“Honestly? I don’t really have a reason. I just wanted to find you.” 

Don’t cry. 

Don’t cry. 

He’s going to think you’re crazy. 

Please don’t cry.

He blinked at her, “Are you okay?”

“Fine! I’m fine!” She said quickly. Her heart was aching for him; longing for him to say I found you, sunflower. 

He narrowed his eyes before standing, “Do you want to come somewhere with me?”

-----

“I’m never coming anywhere with you.” She grumbled.

Taeyong grinned, bouncing the basketball in his hands, “Aww, come on, why?”

“When you come over, you get to stuff yourself with sweets. When I come over, you make me exercise.” 

He laughed and bounced the ball to her. She grabbed it and slowly dribbled it, “Why are you even a chemistry major when you could just get a sports scholarship?”

“I’m not that good. Jaehyun’s super athletic so growing up with him, he’d drag me out to play with him. I went to pick up games of every sport humanly possible. I’m pretty sure he’s even made up some.” He explained. 

She walked towards him, still dribbling the ball. “Mark makes me play too. He usually needs to pay me to do it but I’m pretty good too.”

“Oh really? Scrimmage?” He challenged with a raised brow. 

She smirked and crouched as he mirrored the stance, “Bring it.”

Taeyong lunges for her and she quickly dodged out of the way before running to the basket. She jumped and threw the ball and watched it sail in a perfect arch. Taeyong whistled and caught the ball before trying to run to the opposite end. She tried to catch up but slipped out of her reach and leaped and slammed the ball through the basket. 

They played back and forth, neck and neck, laughing and taunting each other as sweat glistened over their faces. The ball was in Haeun’s hands and she stood still, dribbling it while watching him.

“I can keep going all day.” She challenged. 

His lips hitched, “So can I, Hae. Why? You want me to stop?”

“Never.” She mused, her eyes dark. 

He let out a breath before catching his bottom lip. She looked good, out of breath, hair stuck to her sweat-slicked neck. Thinking about it now, he had to admit that she always looked good. Always. “Then let’s go, angel.”

It slipped out by accident, the adrenaline in his veins and the heavy pounding in his chest drew the name out, and judging by the way the basketball nearly flew out of her hands, it surprised her too.  Her lips parted in shock and if he could see her closer because then he'd see the way her pupils dilated. Like the singular word had a visceral effect on her. And maybe he'd ing love seeing her like that.

Angel.

Distracted, Taeyong charged at her and she screamed when he grabbed her around the waist and lifted her up over his head. The ball dropped and she grabbed the back of his shirt as he spun them around.

“You’re a cheater!” She yelled, kicking her feet with a laugh.

He chuckled and slung her over his shoulder before kicking the basketball away, “Let’s call it a tie!”

“No way! I was going to win!” She argued.

He hummed jokingly, “Well, there’s no way we’ll ever know for sure.”

After teasing her a bit longer, he set her down but kept his hands around her waist. Her hands rested against his shoulders and her smile dropped off her face when he found them chest to chest. Her eyes flickered to his lips before looking back into his eyes, something sparked when he noticed how her eyes moved. 

It was deja-vu from that day in her kitchen but this time they couldn’t blame whatever they do on the alcohol. He could feel her body move with each bated breath through his palms. 

He was pretty sure he was going to kiss her. 

Her face was flushed with a pretty pink blush and she swiped her tongue against her lip, looking glossy and wet and  was he dizzy?

He couldn’t recognize the guy from all those months ago that stood in front of her and said that he didn’t want her in his life; that dating wasn’t going to be a part of his plan for graduating. It was hard to think back to that version of himself because Haeun wasn’t like anything he could’ve imagined. 

She was funny, smart, empathetic, understanding. And so, so pretty. 

He felt safe with her like she could know him, really know him, and still like him, still want him around. She listened to him and made sense of pain that even he struggled to come to terms with.

He didn't know what it meant but he just knew that he really, really liked her.

Before a formal thought or decision could be made in his head, the doors to the gym swung open. Both he and Haeun looked over to see the basketball team come in, chattering and laughing to themselves. They shared a look before stepping away, gathering their things, and leaving. 

Maybe one day he’d get the timing right. 

He had all the time in the world for things to fall into place.

Joseon Dynasty —— 1890

Haeun had come to the palace to drop off the cinnamon cakes and find Taeyong for a moment alone. After dropping the basket off, she stopped by the garden but didn’t find anyone there. 

Continuing through the palace, Haeun failed to find Taeyong anywhere. It still made her nervous to be wandering around alone, at least with Taeyong by her side, no one gave her much thought but she worried that on her own, she might be questioned. 

She tried to stay in main hallways, peeking into open rooms, sweeping for Taeyong until it was clear that he was either away from the palace or training with his men. Pouting and a little disappointed, Haeun turned the corner and ended up in the kitchen. 

After so many months, she still found herself at a loss in the palace. 

The room was darkened and stepping in she froze when she spotted someone sitting by the counter, reaching into the basket that she had delivered earlier. 

“Oh, I’m sorry.” She said, retreating. 

The person turned and she paused when Jaehyun blinked at her, “Your Highness? I apologize for interrupting, I was looking for Taeyong.”

“Ah, he is attending a strategy meeting with my parents’ guards.” He explained before turning his back to her. 

She gulped, his shoulders sagged and his face was missing the typical cheeky brightness that she had come to grow accustomed to. “Would you like some company?”

“Please.” He said, gesturing to the seat near him. 

Taking the stool, she glanced over at him to get a closer look at his expression. He leaned over and lit a gas lamp to illuminate some of the room. The glow of the flame only accentuated the bags under his eyes, the tension in his jaw, and the exhaustion in the way he carried himself. 

“Taeyong told me.” She finally admitted after being drowned by silence. 

He sighed and stared off at the window where he could look into the palace court. “How much?”

“Just that you need to be making hard decisions soon.” She said, “You’re being pressured to pick a bride.”

Jaehyun smiled bitterly, “I recently found out that none of them want me.”

She stilled, “Is that…is that a joke?”

“Hardly. My parents sent their aides to travel to different Kingdoms and meet with eligible Princesses and Noblewoman. Only one Princess responded back with interest.” He explained. 

That didn’t make sense, Jaehyun was handsome, kind, charming, and grounded in his love for his kingdom. Princes were often self centered and greedy for power, Jaehyun was quite the opposite. Every woman in town loved him, how could any Princess and Noblewoman turn him down?

“How is that possible?” She said, aghast. 

He shrugged carelessly, “The increasing rebel attacks and the execution of the Nobleman have scared away any King from making an alliance with our Kingdom and marrying their daughter to me.”

“Oh god, Jaehyun, I’m so sorry, this was all because of what happened to me and how I acted. I didn’t realize how much it would affect you. I’m so sor—“

“Do not apologize to me.” He said bluntly, “My parents did what was right and you did not deserve to be treated like that. In fact, I should thank you.”

She was stunned, “For what possible reason?”

“Princesses do not want me so, I do not need to attend painful meetings with thes