Several weeks had passed again without any significant progress with Doyoung. Unexpectedly he was very patient with you and your uncertainties. And finally a random occassion brought you together, which now you found yourself wandering around in his house.

“Jooyeon, can you please open the door? I have to go to toilet.”

You casually walked towards the front door without checking who it was from the intercom. Doyoung had told you he was anticipating a package, so it probably was the delivery man. You unlocked the door without much thinking, yet when you opened the door, your first reaction was to freeze. “T-Taeyong…” you stuttered in shock.

Taeyong was as surprised as you were. He stared at you in disbelief. How you got there can’t be imagined by him. Were you always this close to Doyoung that you were there, strangely wearing Doyoung’s hoodie—which he noticed directly because he bought a similar one together when he and Doyoung were in Canada. Moreover, you even opened the door for him?

“What are you doing?” asked Taeyong.

You pursed your lips as he entered the house. “I’m waiting for Sooyoung, Yeri, and Johnny,” you muttered in weak voice. It sounded like a made-up excuse, but it wasn’t. You slowly followed him to the living room.

“At Doyoung’s house?” Taeyong raised one eyebrow as he made a dramatic turn to face you. Perhaps he was already judging and having prejudice.

You became silent. Suddenly you felt at wrong. It felt like you cheated on him. That was odd especially when you were not even lovers. But it still felt like you shouldn’t do this.

“Oh? Taeyong?” Doyoung came out from his main bedroom, breaking the silence and the awkward mood between you and Taeyong. “I didn’t know you’re coming.”

Taeyong turned again to see his best friend. “I just want to take the book you borrowed last week.” He paused, giving you a cold glimpse for a second. “I didn’t expect to see Jooyeon here.”

Doyoung took a glance at you who were restless. “We met at the airport. I was sending my brother off to China. Her parents also left to Malaysia for business trip.”

Taeyong immediately comprehended what Doyoung was getting at. Your parents often travel overseas for business trip. Whenever they leave, you would call some friends to throw a sleepover party because you don’t wamt to be alone. Taeyong used to be the first one to call. Then the girls, and if it’s not too much, you would include Ten, Yuta and Johnny. Doyoung was barely there. And now, this sudden change?

“Why didn’t you call me?” Taeyong surprised himself after asking this. I shoudn’t have said that, he thought.

“If I did, would you come to see me?” you responded immediately. Your eyes were fixed on him. There was a slight hope in your eyes, although you didn’t know what you were hoping for. Perhaps having him around like the old times, being that one call away friend, and hanging out together without feeling worried.

Taeyong zipped his mouth. Some bitter memories just flashed in his head. Whem he first dated Hyemi, he really couldn’t come to you. He couldn’t even answer your calls immediately. The last time you had him keeping you company was probably 4 or 5 years ago. Since then, he no longer received a call asking for a company from you. “I’m sorry,” he murmured.

Doyoung silently watched you and Taeyong having the most decent conversation after 5 years. He kept glancing at you and Taeyong back and forth, observing you both.

“No, its okay.” You faked a smile. “Of course I wanted to call you, but I don’t want to disturb you. I don’t want to get in the way between you and…” You weren’t able to finish your sentence. So you immediately diverted your sight to Doyoung and walked approaching him. “Hey, I almost forgot. Can you call Johnny and tell him to stop by at that pizza house? I’ve ordered this morning, all he has to do is just pick it up.”

“Sure.” Doyoung peeked at Taeyong who froze still. He looked sad, confused, and didn’t seem to be so sure of himself. “Taeyong, would you join us? It’s gonna be fun,” Doyoung managed to speak while waiting for Johnny picking up his call.

Just then, Taeyong’s phone rang. He answered it whispering, seeming like he didn’t want to be heard.

You just knew it must be Hyemi. You pretended not to see him and unconsciously shifted your body closer to Doyoung’s side. Taeyong saw this from the corner of his eyes, making him unable to focus on his call. But it was hard not to see you and your interaction with Doyoung. He saw you, the small chattering with Doyoung, and your little giggles you shared with him. He also noticed the changes in the way Doyoung talked to you. His savageness was much less. Everyone knew Doyoung was a sweetheart. And know when he was with you, he seemed to be …sweeter?

What is happening? Taeyong wondered anxiously.

“You down?” Doyoung asked again when he noticed Taeyong was ending his phone call.

“No, I have to go,” he spoke quietly.

“Of course,” you snapped, making Taeyong a bit shocked by your quick reaction. “Hyemi must be waiting. We shouldn’t make her wait any longer.”

Taeyong couldn’t respond at your words. You were too kind to plead him to stay. Sometimes he wanted to hear you say ‘please, stay for a while’. Sometimes he wanted to see you being selfish. He was such a fool for leaving you so many years. The more he realized being friends was much better than 'acquaintances’, the more he regretted his decision pushing you away. Now that you were not even his priority, he couldn’t do anything about it as Hyemi was all over him.

“Be careful on your way,” said Doyoung as he handed over the book Taeyong mentioned earlier.

Taeyong only nodded. He left without words as he gave you a deep gaze.

When you were left alone with Doyoung, the very first thing this bunny boy did was to interogate you. “Are you sure you don’t have that mutual feelings for Taeyong?”

“I don’t know. Of course I love him. But until now I’m 99,99% certain that this is not that kind of love.” You turned to face him. “I mean, I do wish that this friendship will last. But I can’t even picture him and me together in the future.”

“How about me? Do you picture us together in the future?”

“Not even in my wildest dream,” you joked, unable to resist the serious atmosphere with him.

“That’s harsh but I can live with that.”

—

“Apparently Johnny won’t be the next one to follow the path of the married couple,” Sehun said with his mischievous smiley eyes. This statement only already made his friends alert with their sharp ears and their eyes widened. They looked hungry for this kind of information.

“Yes, I can’t believe Doyoung actually goes before me,” Johnny added. He sounded pretty excited and happy at the thought of the younger one to be ahead. Beside him was Doyoung himself with a sheepish grin. Everyone cheered even louder.

“What do you mean?” Taeyong asked. He was curious yet he wasn’t sure if he really wanted to know. He looked at you. You didn’t seem to be as excited as the others. You looked nervous. Basically you never heard from Doyoung if he had told Taeyong about that thing. Taeyong with his quick minds knew there was something he didn’t know.

“Doyoung is getting married!” Yuta exclaimed, followed by cheers from the others. “Doyoung is getting married with Jooyeon!”

Your other friends cheered even louder. You couldn’t even get yourself hyped. Not after you realized how Taeyong froze hearing this breaking news. He was stunned and hjs facial muscles got stiff. He hid his clenching fists in his pockets. You knew instantly that he heard this for the first time. It just came to your conclusion that Doyoung hadn’t told him. Either way, you were sure that Taeyong would have a difficult time accepting this.

The others were too immersed in the most recent news of you and Doyoung. They were either busy congratulating you or being nosy asking how you ended up together when neither of you involved in dating ever.

“Doyoung really is amazing,” Ten commented. “Jooyeon too. How are you so brave to accept him when you barely know each other, except as classmates?”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Doyoung snapped.

You couldn’t really join the bright mood there despite you were the trending topic. You couldn’t stop taking a quick look at Taeyong. He had lost his genuine smile long time ago. But now, you could tell his bitter expression.

“I need fresh air,” Taeyong said before he stormed going outside. None of your friends seemed to care about him at all. They were too focused on you and Doyoung, despite they once knew about how Taeyong felt. They all thought Taeyong had completely gotten over you since he had Hyemi now.

Thankfully that night Hyemi wasn’t able to go with Taeyong. You quickly made an excuse to your squad to chase him. “Taeyong!”

He didn’t even look at you who kept calling his name. You paced up your steps to catch him. “Taeyong, wait!”

Finally he stopped. He made a dramatic turn to face you while panting. His eyes were icy cold staring at you. He looked angry, disappointed, and… betrayed. You had never seen him like this before. “I didn’t know you’re a hypocrite,” he said. Loud and clear.

“Taeyong…” That was also the first time you cried his name with a great guilty feeling. You should have told him sooner. You shouldn’t have asked Doyoung to talk to him. You should have done it yourself.

“Is Doyoung not your friend? I can remember precisely that the Choi Jooyeon I know, she does not date a guy friend from her circle,” he rambled.

“Taeyong, would you listen to me..”

“You know, sometimes I wish we were not friends,” he spat with his teeth gritted. He looked frustrated as he tried suppressing his emotion.

“Taeyong, I’m sorry…” Tears started to form in your eyes. You didn’t want to cry and argue with him at the same time. You used to cry on his shoulder when you had tough arguments with other people, not with him. You never argued with him, at least not for something serious and important.

“Do you know how it feels listening to this bull? The girl I used to like—and FYI, I still do, the girl who always says she can’t date a guy friend because she treasures him a lot and she’s afraid to lose him just in case the worst thing happens, the girl I had to let go so I can move on with my life. The girl who is now getting married to one of her guy friends. And the guy friend is my best friend too. How am I supposed to deal with this?!” he half yelled.

You tried hard holding your tears from falling down. You can’t really answer your raging friend in front of you. Instead some old memories brought you flashback to 7 years ago, the day when Taeyong finally confessed which unfortunately you turned him down.

‘Thank you for liking, and even loving me unconditionally, Taeyong. You know I love you too, but as good friends. You should know that no one can replace you, okay?’

Back then he only smiled accepting his fate. He was sad and that showed a bit in his face. His smile helped disguising the sadness. 'So I am being rejected like this, huh?’ He faked a chuckle.

'Taeyong, you are very precious to me. I don’t want to ever lose you. With our current condition, and as you know my up and down emotions, I don’t want to risk it in a relationship. I don’t like the idea of breaking up and being stranger to each other. Just in case, you know? happens sometimes. I don’t want it to happen to us.’

Taeyong maintained his fake smile. 'You’re right. I don’t like that too.’

You smiled softly at him. 'You’re a good man, Taeyong. You’ll find someone nice, and even better than me.’

He nodded without words. He diverted his sight, then continued, 'What if another friend of yours comes to you and does the same thing I just did? What if he says he loves you and asks you to be his girlfriend?’

You chuckled at his question. 'I don’t think I can imagine saying yes. Look at our friends. Me with Johnny? No way. Yuta? He will roast me forever and I might die early probably. Ten? He is so gonna compare me with his cats. Despite all that, I don’t want to lose them too. They’re my friends who I cherish a lot. Just like you. And you even have greater portion for that.’

Right. Even back then, not even once you mentioned Doyoung’s name. Probably you didn’t even remember having a friend named Kim Doyoung. Yet now, things had been turned upside down and you can’t even give a proper explanation to Taeyong.

“Why him?” he cried, snapping the out of you. “Why not me? Why can’t it be me?! Why are you doing this to me?!” He got more hysterical. “You know what, if you still consider me as your friend, please don’t bother come to my wedding.”

“Taeyong, please…”

“Even if Doyoung asks you to come with him, just… don’t.”

After that you couldn’t really say a word to him even though your mouth was opened. That was when he left, shaking his head slowly in frustration. And finally tears could stream down on your cheeks.