WARNING: mentioned of bully & the victims' feeling.
(I didn't write about the action of the bully but more to the light discussion of the bully's victim's feeling) I just put a warning in case it might trigger someone.

Disclaimer: each people have different emotion toward certain circumstances.

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|| CHAPTER 4 ||

"He hit you again right?" asked Mingyu.

Jeonghan just keep his silent.

“Why didn't you tell me?" scowled Mingyu, "You doesn't believe in me right?" continued Mingyu when he sees Jeonghan is biting his own lips, feeling guilty maybe but it doesn't make Mingyu's disappointment go away.

"It's not like that," Jeonghan answered right away, "Of course I believe in you."

"So, why?! Not only you didn't tell me, you just lied to me. Am I really not worthy to lean on? I'm here to protect you hyung, why don't you give me a chance to do that?" urged Mingyu.

Jeonghan tries to be brave by raising his head and looks straight at Mingyu's angry face, he could see how Mingyu clenches his jaw, "You are younger than me, I'm the one who supposed to protect you— also I'm not looking for you for all this time to make you protecting me from him."

"Is it so important who is older or who is younger now?" asked Mingyu, a bit sarcastic.

"Yes, for me you are always my dongsaeng, so I am the one who should look after you," answered Jeonghan, this time he has a full of confidence to face up Mingyu's anger.

Mingyu grabs Jeonghan's wrist and pulls Jeonghan in. It makes Jeonghan moves forward into Mingyu's body but he quickly puts his other hand on Mingyu's chest to stop their body from bump into each other.

"You know I really hate that age hierarchy culture!! And the more important thing, I'm not your real dongsaeng and I am not longer a boy who was crying in the street looking for way to his home!" Mingyu keeps his voice firm and cold, the same way he talked to Jeonghan when they meet again for the first time in the Book Club's room. 

"Neither am I, I am grown up man who can take care of myself, I don't need any protection from anybody especially from you!" replied Jeonghan, they glare at each other before Mingyu releases his grip on Jeonghan's wrist and takes a step backward.

"Look at you hyung, ask yourself whether you need any protection or not!"

"I said I don't need that! Couldn't you understand?!!!" Jeonghan raises his voice. He glares and purses his lips together, he could feel his body starts to tremble out of anger.

"I see— I see," Mingyu pauses, he emits a sigh, "You really don't need me, okay— I understand now!" Mingyu turns around but he turns back a second later, "Moreover you just see me as a dongsaeng which you could replace with anyone that you pick up in the streets, right? Okay I understand!" replied Mingyu.

Mingyu couldn't stand the frustration he's feeling at this moment, he grabs his backpack from the bench and storm off.

Jeonghan just realized what Mingyu has said when he saw Mingyu walks away, 'No! I need you Mingyu, please don't go.' Jeonghan wants to say that out loud but the words stuck in his throat. He takes a few steps forward following Mingyu but Mingyu's step is faster than him and Jeonghan ends up standing there alone, looking at only Mingyu's back.

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Jeonghan is staring at his phone, he doesn't know what he wants actually. He still disappointed with Mingyu but he feels so empty without Mingyu. He wants Mingyu to contact him but at the same time he doesn't know he would respond or not. Jeonghan lets out a sigh and lets his head rest on his study table. 

"Jeonghan, I bought fried chicken, do you want some?" Joshua says as soon as he enters their room.

Jeonghan turns and smiles weakly, "Thanks Shua but I'm already full."

"Are you sure? I bought it from your favourite store," offered Joshua again.

Jeonghan hums, "Mmm...I really couldn't eat anymore."

"Okay, but if you want, just take it okay," said Joshua but at the same time he feels weird because Jeonghan never refuse his favourite food but he just let it go.

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Today is the fourth day they didn't contact each other. Since the day they fought, Mingyu's state of mind is not so good , just like how he separated with Jeonghan twelve years ago, this time is worse because of the complicated feeling lingering around him, at least twelve years ago his feeling is more simple than what he has right now.

He obviously knows where he could find Jeonghan but he couldn't bring himself to meet him because he's too frustrated