May 2008

When Jimin arrived in the hospital, he didn’t expect that he would hear noises as soon as he opened the door. He was startled upon seeing the number of people in the room. Tzuyu was arranging some flowers in the vase. Chaeyoung was organizing the food they had brought while Dahyun was scolding Yugyeom on the way he peeled the apples.

“I told Dahyun to tell them,” Jungkook spoke, “But I did not expect this mess.”

Jimin beamed, “It’s not too late to kick them out.”

Jungkook shook his head with a smile before telling Jimin, “Thank you.”

“For what? I brought only myself today,” Jimin said before pointing at the bunch, “I think it’s them who brought a lot.”

“For your notes. For the random hospital visits. For checking if I am okay. For everything,” Jungkook replied, “If not for you, I wouldn’t have stayed in school. I wouldn’t be able to meet them.”

“Thank you for showing me kindness even during the times that I refuse to acknowledge that I need help,” Jungkook added, “I really owe you a lot.”

“Don’t worry. I don’t keep tab,” Jimin patted his back, “I’m just happy to help.”

Jungkook’s gaze followed Jimin as the latter walked towards Dahyun and Yugyeom. Upon seeing him, Dahyun then complained on how Yugyeom was ruining the fruits, but Jimin then told them to keep it down as their voices were too loud.

“Jungkook,” Tzuyu called him.

She didn’t say anything after that but following the direction of her eyes, Jungkook understood. The whole room then suddenly fell silent. Jungkook walked towards his mother as the latter observed her surroundings.

“Mom, it’s me, Jungkook,” he spoke taking his mother’s hand, “Are you okay? How do you feel?”

There was silence at first as his mother gazed at the people in front of them. Her lips curved into a smile.

“Are they your friends?” she asked.

Jungkook then looked at them. His lips stretched into a big grin and his eyes wrinkled as he replied, “Yes. Yes, they are.”

June 2018

It’s her.

For some time, all that Jungkook could do was stare at the familiar face. It was almost surreal to meet her again.

“Is she your friend?”

Friend.

Jungkook didn’t know how to answer.

If it was before, he would have answered ‘yes’ without hesitation. She used to be a life constant. They used to ride the same bus to school. They even worked together during one school break. They were in the same circle throughout high school and if Jungkook was to enumerate all the memories, a day would not be enough.

But it had been ages since he last saw her. He was no longer sure how to label their relationship.

“Not exactly,” he finally replied.

“Well, go on. I’ll cover you first,” his colleague urged him, “For her to wait for long, I’m sure she has something to say to you.”

He walked towards her, drinking every detail of her features – the ones that remained the same and the things that have changed. He took slow steps. His heart was beating loud against his chest and he wasn’t sure if it was brought by nervousness of showing himself or by the excitement of seeing her again. Perhaps both.

“Dahyun,” he called her.

The name already sounded foreign on his lips.

She turned and immediately, her lips stretched into a big grin that turned her eyes into crescent slits.

“Jungkook!” she almost screamed.

Her skin was as pale as ever, but she had colored her hair into light brown. She had lost weight too. But her smile was the same – always genuine, always bright.

She stood up to hug him, her short arms encircling his torso. Jungkook was startled at the gesture. He could not even remember the last time he was given an embrace.

“Sorry,” Dahyun apologized and quickly lets him go after realizing that he was not returning the hug. She brushed off the awkwardness with a beam, “It’s just… It’s been so long. How many years has it been?”

Honestly, Jungkook had lost count of the days. He came to the point when dates no longer matter because every day was just the same.

“Seven,” Dahyun answered her own question, “Yeah. It’s been seven years.”

Jungkook observed her eyes as they seemed lost on their own as if there was a million of memories flashing before her. Then, she shook her head, disturbing her own train of thoughts.

She smiled again before directing their conversation, “So how are you?”

There were so many reasons for Jungkook to answer ‘not okay’ – no, he was far from being alright.

“Fine, I guess,” he sighed.

“So, do you cook here?” she questioned.

“No. I’m a service crew,” he replied, and he was so sure that shock crossed her countenance.

Of course. She knew him during the time when he had all the potential – when he was the treasured golden boy.

“This is only one of the menial jobs I am taking,” Jungkook told her. He thought that there was no point in pretending. He continued, “I also work at a gasoline station. I mix drinks at a bar. Sometimes, I work at the port too – just carrying boxes here and there.”

He saw it in her eyes. The disappointment. He knew it was coming for he never became anything close to anyone’s expectations of him. He was plainly a disappointment and he saw no point trying to prolong their conversation to hide it.

“W-Why so many jobs?” Dahyun stuttered, “Do you have troubles with finances?”

“Not really,” Jungkook shook his head, “I live alone now, so there’s not much expenses. I just need to get by every day. But I just… I just like being busy.”

He wanted to say that the busyness kept him from thinking too much – from dealing with the pain he was still enduring. But he didn’t bother saying the words. His walls were too high.

He saw her lips move but then she hesitated. He could already guess the many questions running through her head.

What happened to the bright student?

What happened to med school?

What happened to our promise of achieving all our dreams?

What happened to your promise of coming back successful?

What happened to your mother?

What happened to you?

“So what are you doing here?” Jungkook asked, preventing Dahyun to ask any of the questions he was afraid to face.

“To see you,” Dahyun replied – her tone latched with an accusation; as if she did not understood why Jungkook would ask that question.

“Of course,” Jungkook nodded but then he chuckled emptily. He asked, “Is there anything else you want from me? I need to work.”

The brightness that painted her face when she saw him was long gone. Her countenance was only full of confusion and sadness.

“I’m trying to bring all of us together again,” Dahyun confessed.

“I’m not interested in class reunions,” Jungkook replied.

“No. It’s not the class. Just us,” Dahyun corrected, “Just our bunch.”

He need not be told the names to understand.

“It’s for Jimin,” Dahyun added with a sigh, “He’s the one who requested it.”

It’s for Jimin.

Jungkook then knew that there was at least one thing that time didn’t change. Jimin’s and Dahyun’s bond never aged.

“Don’t you want to see them?” Dahyun asked.

He stared at her and he saw the glimmer of hope in her eyes. But the same eyes spoke of pain when Jungkook shook his head.

“No,” Jungkook replied, “Sorry but I don’t want to see them.”

She couldn’t find any words to say; perhaps, she was not expecting rejection.

Jungkook then stood up, “I have to go back to work.”

He walked away, not bothering to look back. He realized he didn’t even ask her how she was and perhaps, that was better. He didn’t want to traverse a bridge that had already been disintegrated by time.  He knew he will never be ready to face them again for they would remind him of a home he could never go back to.

“Do you have a child with her or something?” Dokyeom asked.

Dokyeom was in the same age with him, juggling many jobs to help his poor family. Jungkook would not go to the extent of calling him a friend but he was a comfortable presence, nonetheless.

Jungkook looked at the direction where his colleague was staring. He shook his head.

“Dude, it’s her third day visiting the restaurant,” Dokyeom spoke, “You can’t just hide whenever she’s here, you know.”

It was true that he tried to stay in the kitchen as much as he could when Dahyun was around. Whenever he is out taking orders, he would see from the corner of his eyes that Dahyun was watching him. She would raise her hand – always asking for some assistance but Jungkook would choose to ignore it, even if he was already near her.

But despite his attitude, Dahyun would still stay in the restaurant.  Even his co-workers had already started noticing.

“Do you owe her a large sum of money?” Dokyeom guessed.

“No,” Jungkook creased his eyebrows.

“Either she loves the food here too much or she loves you,” Dokyeom teased.

“It’s the food,” Jungkook answered nonchalantly.

Dokyeom grunted, “No person in her right mind would spend hours every day in the same restaurant doing nothing.”

“She’s just like that,” Jungkook replied.

“What? Staying in restaurants is her thing?” Dokyeom asked.

“She’s the type who could endure anything for people she cares for,” Jungkook told him.

June 2008

Jungkook noticed that Dahyun seemed to be off the grid. It was usual for her not to listen to classes, but she would keep herself busy with magazines under her desk or with doodles in her notebook. But today, she was merely occupied by staring into nothingness. It was during lunch time when others were busy buying their food that Jungkook decided to ask her. The way her mind wandered again before answering already confirmed his worries.

He saw her hesitation so he reminded her, “You know, it’s unfair if the ‘you don’t have to feel alone’ rule would only apply to me.”

She chewed on her lower lip before requesting, “Do you promise not to share it with anyone?”

“Not even with Jimin?” Jungkook creased his forehead.

“Specially not with Jimin,” Dahyun sternly said.

He nodded.

She was biting her nails as Jungkook scanned the message in her phone. There were pictures attached to the mail – pictures of Chaeyoung. First was a class picture where Chaeyoung was encircled. The next pictures were her on dates – with the man who sat on the adviser’s chair, her teacher.

“Is this true?” Jungkook asked in a whisper.

“I don’t know,” Dahyun replied.

He wanted to ask who the sender was, but the number was unregistered. Nevertheless, the text in the body of the message already gave out a clue.

            Stay away from Jimin if you do not want these pictures to circulate.

“What should I do?” Dahyun asked him.

“I think you should tell Jimin that his girlfriend is threatening you. He could help.”

“But she got Chaeyoung’s pictures! This will ruin her!”

“Then, tell Chaeyoung as well.”

“I can’t,” Dahyun shook her head, “For to keep it a secret even from us, I know she has reasons.”

“What do you want to do then?” Jungkook threw her questions back to her, “Can you really avoid Jimin?”

The next days told Jungkook the answer.

Dahyun stopped going home with Jimin. She would watch Tzuyu practice archery or pretend studying in the library until late afternoon.  She also went to the extent of not greeting him in the corridors. It made others suspicious – even Tzuyu asked if they were fighting.

But it was on the fifth day that Dahyun was finally confronted by Jimin.

“Can I talk to you?”

“Hey,” Dahyun couldn’t meet his eyes, “Uhm. I… I promised to study with Jungkook.”

“Just five minutes,” Jimin insisted, “Please.”

“I don’t know what we are going to talk about,” Dahyun turned to leave.

“Are we okay, Dahyun?” Jimin asked as he walked behind her.

“Of course,” she shakily answered.

Jimin then grabbed her wrist, making her turn around, “Then why are you avoiding me?”

“I-I am not avoiding you,” Dahyun stammered.

“You’re not a good liar,” Jimin stared at her.

Dahyun averted her gaze and Jimin sighed.

“Did I do something wrong? Was it something I said?” Jimin asked, “Why don’t you tell me so I can fix it?”

She couldn’t say anything for Jimin was not at fault.

“Look, whatever it is, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry,” Jimin’s voice was so soft, “Can you just please tell me what’s wrong?”

She bit her lip hard before finally meeting his eyes. Dahyun then spoke, “You are suffocating me.”

“What?” Jimin was confused.

“I’m just… I’m just tired of being with you,” Dahyun said, “I’ve been with you through all these years Jimin and I realized that I need to meet more people. I need to spend time without you too. I don’t want to live a life that’s too dependent on your existence.”

“I’m not preventing you from doing anything,” Jimin retorted, “You can always make new friends and go out – “

“I want change, Jimin!” she exclaimed, “And there is no room for change if the two of us would always be together!”

“So the change that you want is for me to disappear in your life?” Jimin whispered.

Dahyun gulped, “Yes.”

His expression then changed into a cold one before he casted his gaze downwards. He beamed but the smile didn’t reach his eyes as he said, “If that’s really what you want.”

Dahyun watched as Jimin turned his heels to leave without even looking back. She could do nothing but merely let her gaze follow his disappearing figure.

“You can chase him now and apologize,” Jungkook spoke.

He did not mean to eavesdrop but the two caused a scene that was too hard not to notice.

Dahyun replied, “You’re the one who told me to get a circle of my own.”

“I did not tell you to erase him from your life,” Jungkook retorted.

“This is for the best,” she answered, “Woah. I am so excited to live a life without Jimin.”

“Are you really okay with that?”

“Of course.”

“Then, why are you crying?”

Dahyun glared at Jungkook through her tears before she replied, “These are tears of joy.”

He removed his jacket and draped it over her in order to hide her crying face.

Then he whispered, “Jimin’s right. You’re not a good liar.”

Hello! I wrote this last Thursday and I am happy that I did so because the past few days have been busy. Hahahuhu. Fortunately, I still have something to present to you. Haha. Thank you for reading! Please don't be shy to comment down you thoughts. I want to talk to people. Haha. Thank you!!!