Chapter 15: Repetition

The (Not so) Perfect Story

 

Wait... let me think of what to say...

Okay!

Repetition in stories makes it choppy. I don't mean repeating the sentence again. I mean the words.

...

Just read.

 

Repeated sentences:

Example 1:

In Infinite's Come Back Again music video, Sungyeol was so cool! He had really awesome clothes that made him look amazing! Also, I think he looks real cool with eyeliner on. He also had this awesome super power that teleported him places and a cool power that made him run faster. But, I think everyone looked really cool and was really awesome.

Ew. You see what's wrong with that paragraph?

"So cool! So awesome!"

I got it, I got it, he was cool and awesome. He was only cool and awesome? Let's spice it up and use some different words alright?

 

Example 2:

"Hi!" Podomo said.
"Hey!" Momo said.
"You wanna hang out today?" Podomo asked.
"Sure!" Momo said.
"Let's go to the mall!" Podomo said.

Ew. Again.

"Said, said, said, said." 

There are more words in the world than 'said'

 

How to avoid repetition:

Just don't use that word again in the same sentence or paragraph! Use some different words.

Cool:

  • Beautiful
  • Breathtaking
  • Impressive
  • Mind-Blowing
  • Grand
  • Shocking
  • Great
  • Fine

Really people, the thesaurus isn't there for nothing. I admit, everytime I write, I use the thesaurus.
[Because I'm way younger than I sound... but not that young...]

 

Said:

  • Exclaimed
  • Declared
  • Answered
  • Reply
  • Decided
  • Uttered'
  • Mumbled
  • Whispered

 

Unrepeated sentences:

In Infinite's Come Back Again music video, Sungyeol was so cool! He had bad boy clothes that made him look so y. I also think he looks real hot with eyeliner. He should wear more eyeliner.
He had this impressive super power that teleported him places and made him run faster.
But, truthflully speaking, I think everyone looked stunning.

Here, I replaced the 'cool's and the 'awesome's with other words.
I also changed up the placement. If you can see, I used the 'Enter' key on my keyboard to shift some sentences down, making it clearer. 

 

"Hi!" Podomo greeted.
"Hey!" Momo said.
"You wanna hang out today?"
"Uhm. Let me see if I'm free." Momo took out her phone and looked at her schedule. "Oh, I can!"
"Alright!" Podomo exclaimed. "Let's go to the mall!"

Here, I added a few sentences and changed some 'said's. 

 

 

Remember:

Use the thesarus.
 

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203693
#1
Chapter 19: Thanks so much for your help!!
__happyvirus #2
Chapter 19: Lmao at the story bout a guy and a girl falling in love.
BabysWarriors
#3
Chapter 9: Can I ask a question? But what if you are the OC of the story and you have a name for it?
BabysWarriors
#4
Chapter 9: Did I just saw my own username here? Omg. HAHAHA!
HeyItsBubble
#5
Chapter 19: THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
RoyaltyKY
#6
Chapter 9: When your username appears in an example xD
Thanx for this book tho, it's really saving my life
islandgirlluvsLAY
#7
Chapter 19: You are awesome! Thank you!
trotinetka
#8
Chapter 19: You just saved my life! Thank you very much :) This post is awesome! You're a good person :D