Since Jessica departure, the girls have been avoiding me especially Yuri and Yoona. Maybe her departure was all my fault. But she really wants to pursue her dreams and SM really have strict rules about doing business outside SNSD. Who wants to be apart like this? We are all mad and sad about SM conditions about Jessica but we also under contract. I have failed of being a good leader and good example for my members. And I have no one to talk to. I have a boyfriend who still think playing games is more important than a serious conversation with girlfriend. But I still have Tiffany. I know she’s upset about Jessica leaving the group and I can’t stop her from leaving or asking to SM about this and that, but  it’s her dream and SM against it. You can blame me all you want girls, I feel the same thing as you guys about Jessica leaving. Anyway, after got some sleep now I go through Instagram and Tiffany is sit across my bed while looking directly at me like I am some kind disease.

                “What are you looking at?” I shoot at her, can’t take it anymore.

                “Are you sure you’re not doing anything stupid at Jiyong’s place? I mean.. G-Dragon’s place!! Anything can happen! And he’s your ex..” At the last sentence she slow down her voice.

                “What do you expect? Like having and doing drugs together? Do you think I am that stupid?”

                “Of course not boo! I am just worried. You didn’t even text me when you usually text me when you want to sleep around.”

                “Do you think I am some kind of ?!” I totally shout right now. And she came close to me, her facial expression said she worry as .

                “NOOO! I am not thinking like that. Why are you so emotional, I am just asking!”

                “You guys makes me like this, you guys blame me and everything about Jessica leaving saying I am not doing anything at all to defend Sica. She wants that. She wants to pursue her dream. What can I do about it?”

                Tiffany looks very sorry, she came even closer to me and I stare at her really pissed off.

                “I didn’t blame you.” she said quietly.

                “But the other girls did. So don’t blame me for staying all night at bar and end up at G-Dragon’s bed. I know I’m not doing anything except I puked on him.” I said and that make Tiffany’s expression more terrified.

                “YOU WHAT??”

                But then my phone ring twice. I ignored Tiffany to read messages

                [Baek Baby] Noona! I have new game set, want to play? Please come to my dorm!

What the heck with this kid? I ignore his text to read another message. This one is from.. Jiyong?

                [Jiyong] So.. we’re just old friend?

What does he mean? Oh! His manager must told him about my phone call earlier.

                [You wrote] Maybe.

                [Jiyong] Hope to meet you in sober state. xo

                I didn’t reply to his text anymore. I choose to reply Baekhyun text and decide to meet him to end some immature things between us or in this case just his immature side. I really have no time to baby sit such a kid. Thinking about it again, Jiyong words come to me again, where’s your little boyfriend? What is he doing letting his girlfriend drunk in a drunken bar like that?

                Little boyfriend?

                Ha! So funny. I