Dear my sun and moon,

Last message I talked about how I was feeling powerless to the dark thoughts in my mind. I watched Frozen 2, and the song "The Next Right Thing" spoke to me on a monumental level. 

It's hard to let go and not let my darkness consume me, but all I can do is take one step forward. 

This winter season will be hard, especially as the dreaded date draws near, but I know I'll be okay. You're here, with me, not physically but your music, your legacy is still here and that will be my guide to get through the cold months, and maybe through this downward spiral of my depression that has taken over my life. 

I'll leave the lyrics for "The Next Right Thing" because I wish this song was around when you were still here. 

I've seen dark before
But not like this
This is cold
This is empty
This is numb
The life I knew is over
The lights are out
Hello, darkness
I'm ready to succumb

I follow you around
I always have
But you've gone to a place I cannot find
This grief has a gravity
It pulls me down
But a tiny voice whispers in my mind
"You are lost, hope is gone
But you must go on
And do the next right thing"
 

Can there be a day beyond this night?
I don't know anymore what is true
I can't find my direction, I'm all alone
The only star that guided me was you
How to rise from the floor
When it's not you I'm rising for?
Just do the next right thing
Take a step, step again
It is all that I can to do
The next right thing
 

I won't look too far ahead
It's too much for me to take
But break it down to this next breath
This next step
This next choice is one that I can make

So I'll walk through this night

Stumbling blindly towards the light

And do the next right thing
And with the dawn, what comes then
When it's clear that everything will never be the same again?
Then I'll make the choice
To hear that voice
And do the next right thing

I miss you so much my sun and moon.