It was the last night of their trip and Youngjae could not ignore the disappointment building in his chest. He wish this trip could last much longer.

He admits that he was not excited about it the first night but after his talk with Jaebum things were much clearer to him. No matter what he felt he was going to keep Jaebum close to him and cherish him.

It was late at night and the four boys; Jinyoung, Mark, Jaebum and Youngjae were sitting by the edge of a hill staring up at the stars. They had drank a couple of soju bottles by now. Youngjae being the lightweight was already feeling the alcohol in his system.

“Let’s play a game..” It was Jinyoung speaking.

“What kind of game?” Mark asked.

“How about Never Have I ever?”

No one seemed to disagree since Jinyoung would end up having his way anyway.

“Mark goes first then I’ll go, Jaebum and lastly, my baby brother Youngjae.”

“Alright.. Never Have I ever eaten mud.”

Everyone but Jinyoung and Mark took a drink. A match made in heaven Jaebum commented and they all laughed.

They continued the same pattern no one really crossing any real border lines. Mentioning things such as never have I ever stolen, or cheated on a test.

A couple turns after Youngjae got curious so he outed himself.

“Never have I ever kissed anyone of the same gender or opposite gender.”

The rest of the guys took a drink. Youngjae’s eyes focused on Jaebum though. Of course he has kissed people before. It should not surprise Youngjae but his heart still ache.

It was Mark’s turned now. His eyes shifted towards Jinyoung then to Jaebum and Youngjae before speaking up.

“Never have I ever been in love with someone I shouldn’t be in love with..” Mark's words slur due to the alcohol.

They sat in silence for a couple minutes before both, Youngjae and Jaebum took a sip of their drinks.

Jinyoung sat up abruptly almost spilling his beverage.

“Wait a minute.. Who is this person?” He asked both Jaebum and Youngjae.

“Jaebum, I am so hurt. I am your best friend. I should know about these things.” Then he turned to Youngjae.

“And you.. What other secrets are you keeping from me? Who is out here stealing my baby brother’s heart and love from me?!”

Youngjae averted his eyes away from everyone as he slowly stood up.

“I’m done playing.. I’m going to bed now.”

xx

Youngjae was inside the bathroom when a soft knock on the door interrupted his empty mind. He stood silent.

“Hey.. It’s me.” It was Jinyoung.

It took Youngjae a minute before cracking the door open.

“Jinyoung before you get mad at me.. Please just listen to me.”

“I’m listening.”

“I won’t tell you who it is but know that this person is kind and would never hurt me. They also don’t know that I love them and I don’t plan on telling them ever because.. because I know for a fact they don’t love me back, so you don’t have to worry about me getting a boyfriend or anything crazy like that.”

A single tear escaped Youngjae. He expected Jinyoung to yell or even interrogate him but instead he felt broad arms wrap around him. Jinyoung hugged him with all his might and no other words were exchanged besides Jinyoung whispering that he loved him.

After Youngjae felt better Jinyoung and him walked into the living room. Jaebum and Mark mumbled something among each other and completely stayed quite when Jinyoung and Youngjae walked in. Neither of the boys questioned it.

“I’m really sorry about what happened. I hope I didn’t ruin the night but I am heading to bed now. I really enjoyed this trip. I am so glad I came out with you guys.” Youngjae smiled at all the boys.

All the boys agreed that Youngjae didn’t ruin anything. Mark apologized on his own behalf and finally they all went to their assigned rooms.

Once again Youngjae found himself on the same bed as Jaebum. Not one word was spoken for roughly 20 minutes. Just when Youngjae was about to say something Jaebum beat him to it.

“Youngjae, I hope that whoever it is that you love is worth it and that they feel the same way about you.. Because if not, then they’re an idiot.”

‘You are’ Youngjae thought before making that initial thought disappear. Youngjae felt a little more confident now, so he spoke up.

“Jaebum?”

“Yes?”

“This might be a lot to ask of you but can you hold me again tonight? I’m a little cold.” He lied.

Youngjae did not get a response, only broad arms welcomed him into them.

Tomorrow they would be back home and Youngjae did not want to miss his last opportunity to be in Jaebum’s arms.