3

Jisoo came home a wrecked. He had picked her up from her sister’s place thinking that she would be her usual energized self, but he was met by a quiet Jisoo. She looked more depressed than when he had left her. Hee-ran noona’s face was also unreadable, as if something had transpired but no one wanted to divulge anything to him. As soon as he started the car and they were out of eyesight Jisoo broke down. She cried so hard he felt that she would cry her life away. He pulled the car over to try to comfort her, and for the first time it she had grasp his arm. It was like she was hanging on to him for dear life.

They had spent almost two hours in the car, with him hugging her and not saying anything. When she had finally calmed down the first words she uttered were.

“Why is God so unfair? Why are women who are not supposed to be pregnant with child now, while here I am … childless.”

His arms tightening around her voluntarily. Her words imbedding itself in his heart, in his soul.

“Why was God unfair?”

He had decided to take her to the condo that he had purchased just a few months ago. He couldn’t bring her to their house because things weren’t okay there yet. She was already in so much pain, having his grandmother hurl insults at her or even physically hit her was the last thing he wanted.

She didn’t ask why they were spending the night in the condo, she merely followed him as he walked, letting him lead the way for her.

Her wrist felt smaller in his hand. She had grown thin, in just a few days, or was it just him not noticing. He had told his grandmother than he was divorcing her but he wanted time to do it properly and decently without hurting her. But, as she slept peacefully next to him, he was asking himself how he could do it. How could he tell her now that they are getting a divorce?

He had called the main house and explained to them that he couldn’t break the news to her now. He explained to his mother that something must have happened back home and that she was depressed. His parents understood, but from the background he could hear his grandmother nagging and complaining. He asked them again to give him time.

Her niece was pregnant. Her niece who had  an entire Kpop career waiting for her was with child. She had trained for 6 years and she was just a few months away from her debut, but now everything seemed vague. Her heart ached at the unfairness of it all, her niece shouldn’t be pregnant! She was young, unmarried and had her whole future set out for her. While there she was married and childless, had spent 5 years trying to form a baby. She had tried all non-intrusive medical treatment to get pregnant, but with no result. But it wasn’t her niece becoming pregnant that left her broken and shattered, it was what her sister had said that left her feeling upset and later on numb.

“We need to abort this baby! You need to get and abortion!”

She had cried then and there upon hearing those words. They would kill a baby, an innocent child. They would get rid like a piece of garbage, the treasure that she has been praying for for 5 freaking years! She ended up throwing and fit and having an argument with her unnie because of it.

“Do you have any idea how blessed you are! What my in-laws would give to hear the word pregnant! Positive! I am going to have a baby!” she wailed in anguish.

Her usual bubbly self that she used to disguise her suffering shattered and for the first time in 5 years, she let them see what she was going through.

Whenever her family would ask why there was no baby news yet, she would reply that they weren’t ready. But her stay that weekend revealed the truth. Her rational unnie was mortified, when she realized what her little sister was going through.

“We wouldn’t even let a fly hurt you!” her unnie shouted angrily. She had no choice but to tell them the truth. How for these past 5 years, she never had a peaceful sleep, and that even when she was at home with them she could not relax. She constantly had to put on a brave face so her parents won’t get hurt, so that her siblings won’t get mad.

She had tried so hard, but she was beyond exhausted now. The flame she had in her life was slowly becoming smaller and smaller, and she was scared of the day it would finally die out.

Thursday. He had brought her home after four days. She seemed to have recovered a little and his parents had coaxed his grandmother into dropping the issue, and just letting him do it on his own. Jisoo was still quiet, but at least she ate now, and would talk to him whenever he checked on her. She was not feeling well when they arrived so he tucked her in bed while he went out to buy her something she liked to eat.

His grandmother eyed him as he told her that he was going out. She went into her room when he shook his head showing that he hasn’t told Jisoo yet about his desire for a divorce. He out of the house hoping to find something that would make his wife feel better. And make him forget the dreaded task he was supposed to do.

After 5 years. They had met again after 5 years. Jihyo greeted him warmly, like he was an old friend she had in college, and not the guy who broke heart on their anniversary. He closed his eyes trying to fight the memory away. He could picture it perfectly, her his then girlfriend carrying a cake she had bought somewhere. Him, in so much stress like he was now, being forced by his own family to end his relationship with the girl he loved.

“You’ve known ever since you were young that are engaged to someone else!” his grandmother had scolded him when he tried to disobey. But no amount of reasoning, persuading or begging could change their mind.

His grip on the plastic bag containing the fruit jelly Jisoo liked loosened. He gave up his true love for a woman who couldn’t bare a child. The memory of his break-up with Jihyo came rushing back to him.

“Let’s break up.” he told her as she approached him carrying the cake. She stopped in her tracks, looking at him shocked. He wanted to take back the words he had said but he knew that his family was watching through the school’s CCTV.

Her eyes tearing up as he told her the truth. The truth to why he wasn’t answering her calls, or why he had missed numerous dates, and why he was breaking up with her.

‘I’m arranged to marry someone else next month.” he almost teared up as he said those words. He had met the girl, told her blatantly that he  had a girlfriend, told her that she should cancel the engagement because he couldn’t do anything to c