The Revel-LOVE Dating Agency was a legend among the students of Dongguk University. The name was spoken among the student body and staff alike in hushed tones, stories of their epic deeds spread by whispers. To some, they were mere myths, stories made up by other students about creepy witches who give out cursed love potions but to others, they were real, flesh and blood students who make people’s love interests come true.

The Stupid Cupids—what Revel-LOVE crew was called by majority of the student body—were supposedly a group of good-looking girls whose identities were a complete secret—unless one knew where to ask.

And Park Bogum was in dire need of their services.

“You sure they’ll be there?” he anxiously asked his friend, Nam Joohyuk, as they sat together at lunch.

“Of course! I was their client, remember? They helped me win Sungkyung over,” Joohyuk clapped his back reassuringly, “Are you sure she’s worth it? Their services don’t come in cheap, you know.”

Bogum started to shake his head, “Dude, have you seen her? She’s more than worth it. Besides, I don’t have any other choice. She’s been turning me down ever since.”

“Then why don’t you just give up?”

“No. Giving up is not an option,”

Joohyuk sighed in resignation, “I warned you, hyung. Arts Building, third floor, west wing, the old music room every Friday at 2:30. Keep that in mind,” he pressed a finger to his lips, “And keep this a secret, okay? The Stupid Cupids can be a bit…overwhelming.”

Park Bogum ruffled his hair, a bit exasperated and a lot troubled. He had heard stories about the Revel-LOVE Dating Agency and the Stupid Cupids. They weren’t particularly horrifying but it didn’t ease his anxiety despite the good reviews everyone gave. He didn’t doubt their abilities. No, he didn’t. After all, they were the ones who made the borderline psychopathic Lee Sungkyung fall for his friend Nam Joohyuk.

Faster than he’d like, Friday came. At 2PM, Bogum was already starting to hesitate if he should go through with his plan. Was he really desperate enough to spend wads of dollars to get a girl?

Turns out he was.

By 2:23, he was already pacing nervously in front of the Arts Building’s abandoned music room. There didn’t seem to be anything special about it; just an old, worn out but exquisitely carved wooden door. Hell, there didn’t even seem to be anyone in there.

In his fifteenth lap, Bogum finally stopped and glanced at his watch.

Exactly 2:30.

He made up his mind. With a deep breath, he stepped forward and gripped the cold, metallic knob. Another deep breath later and he was twisting, pushing the door open.

What he saw inside was none of what he had expected.

The room was the size of a ballroom, dimly lit. A gush of cold, air-conditioned wind that hit Bogum smelled an intoxicating mixture of fruits, flowers, and musk.

And there were the cupids.

Directly behind them were countless monitors that showed static, the light from the screen allowing Bogum to see only their silhouettes. In the middle of the room was a grand piano with a girl perched on top, facing the monitors, and surrounded by lit candles. Another girl stood just beside her, leaning forward on the instrument, her head down as she read a book. Flanking the piano was two more girls, seated on stools. The one on the left was playing a somewhat eerie tone with a flute. The girl on the right was just staring off to space and drumming her fingers, earphones jammed in her ears.

Finally, they noticed Bogum’s presence and stopped what they were doing at once to look at him. His hair stood on end at how they turned to him in perfect sync, their eyes blank and bored. The girl on the piano turned to look at him over her shoulder. Beside her, the other girl lifted her head from her book to give him a blank stare. The one on the right took out an earbud and looked at him. Flute Girl stopped playing. Bogum never knew he’d miss such creepy music but right now, it was better than heavy silence.

They continued to pulverize him with their gaze.

How long has it been? A minute? Two? He lost count but he sure was squirming and debating whether he should just run for it.

“U-Um, I’m looking for R-Revel-LOVE Dating Agency?”

Silence.

And then Earphones Girl broke into a smile that made Bogum weak with relief, “Oh cheery! A client!”

“Is he, now?” said the girl on the piano. Bogum realized she was playing with her phone the whole time she was turned around. She hopped off and walked around to stand in front, leaning back against the instrument with crossed arms, “Well? Come on in, Mister Customer,”

Reluctant, Bogum entered and closed the door behind him. Without the light from outside, the room was relatively darker. He still couldn’t make out their faces.

“Well then, what can we possibly do for our Mister Perfect, Park Bogum sunbaenim?” taunted the girl with the book. “I can’t believe even this guy needs help,”

“Don’t be rude, Squirtle,” Flute girl reprimanded.

Meanwhile, Bogum had stiffened up, “How-How did you know my name?”

The girl in the middle smiled, her white teeth and mischievous eyes glinting in the dark, “We’re all-knowing, sunbaenim. Weren’t you briefed before you went here, hm?”

“I…I…” the Stupid Cupids can be a bit…overwhelming, Joohyuk’s words echoed in his mind. Hell, overwhelming was an understatement. They were downright creepy. “I was warned that you’d be…o-overwhelming,”

Center Girl laughed, “Well, that’s a nice term. People often talk about us as creepy, love potion brewing witches. Rawr.” she heaved out a manic laugh that sounded every bit like a witch’s. Bogum warily stepped back.

“You’re scaring him, Gorgeous,” Earphones Girl said.

“Am I? Sorry, I tend to have that effect on humans,” the sly grin was back but that didn’t make Bogum any less uncomfortable, “Well then, what can we do for you, sunbaenim?”

“I…er…I’d like to buy your services,” he managed to say.

“Well, duh,” in the dark, he could barely see her rolling her eyes, “Of course you do. What we’re trying to ask is, who’s the lucky girl—or boy, if you swing that way. No pressure,”

Bogum took in a deep breath.

“I’d like you to help me win Irene Bae’s heart,”

***

Complete silence.

That was the answer Bogum got after he’d voice out his request. The girls just stared at him for long seconds before the girl with the book—the one they called ‘Squirtle’—threw her hands in the air. “This guy must be crazy,” she muttered quietly but loud enough for Bogum to hear.

Center Girl nodded, “A complete lunatic,”

Yeah. Perhaps he was.

 “Girls!” Flute Girl chided and seemed to shoot the two a glare before turning to Bogum, “Sorry about them, Bogum-ssi, but are you perhaps talking about the Irene Bae from the dance department?”

“Y-Yes, I am,”

Another complete silence.

“Well,” Earphones Girl spoke, shifting uneasily, “Didn’t she, like, sort of declared that she doesn’t want anything to do with boys and romance and stuff like that?”

“Yes  she did,” Book Girl replied quietly, “Told you he’s crazy,”

“A complete lunatic,” Center Girl repeated with another nod.

“Wait,” Bogum raised his hands in a time-out gesture, confused by their reaction, “Are you telling me that you won’t take the job?”

 “What do you think?” Center Girl started pacing, “Irene Bae’s up there, cannot be reached. She’s made it quite clear that she wasn’t going to accept any suitors and no one had succeeded in taking her hand, or rather, no one had dared to do so,” she strode in front of Bogum and leaned close, tilting her head and the latter could only gasp, recognizing the familiar face.

“You’re…you’re…”

Park Sooyoung, or widely known as Joy; the sophomore troublemaker from psychology department that needed psychological attention.

She was infamous for doing rebellious stunts, the most popular of all being her vandalism on Professor Jo’s brand new car. The thing was, everybody knew she was the culprit yet she remained unscathed because no one was able to provide concrete evidence.

Joy Park smiled, “Are you sure you’re good enough to change Irene Bae’s mind, hm?”

“I…Of-Of course!”

“Then,” Joy Park continued, “Are you sure you could afford our services? I’m sure you’ve been informed we charge quite high,”

“I’m willing to pay anything!”

The moment Joy Park raised her brows, Bogum knew he shouldn’t have said that.

“Anything?” she asked in a whisper.

But it was too late to back down. They were talking about a possible future with Irene Bae here. He wouldn’t back down.

And so he nodded firmly.

“Anything,”

Joy Park studied him for a moment, her serious face just as unnerving as her smiling one. He squirmed under her probing gaze but returned the stare with all the willpower he could muster.

And then she smiled.

She stepped away from him, “Did you get all that, unnie?”

“Yep,” Earphones Girl gave a thumbs-up and played a short Mozart and their previous conversation filled the room.

“Are you sure you could afford our services? I’m sure you’ve been informed we charge quite high,”

“I’m willing to pay anything!”

“Anything?”

“Anything,”

Bogum blinked, unable to comprehend what was happening.

“I’m afraid we’re going to hold you on your word, sunbaenim,” Book Girl said with a grin. She had shifted a bit to the right that the candlelight was able to illuminate her face. He recognized her too and it only made him wish he didn’t: Kim Yerim, Park Sooyoung’s partner-in-crime and the bane of the senior high school department. Notorious for her perfect attendance at the office of the prefect of discipline for various offenses, “You’ll be willing to pay anything, yeah?”

Bogum was starting to think he had gotten himself into a huge, huge trouble.

Suddenly, the screens flashed, showing a video of him and Joy a few moments ago, in every possible angle.

“Am—Am I being blackmailed?” he asked, outraged and bewildered as he looked around, trying to spot the cameras only to see pitch black.

“Oh, no, no, you’re not. It’s all part of the protocol,” Earphones Girl reassured him. The light from the monitors illuminated her face and Bogum actually felt reassured by her presence. Kang Seulgi, the fine arts angel. She had the reputation of being really pretty inside and out. A pure, innocent soul that wouldn’t even kill an ant. Maybe this dating agency isn’t as shady as he thought.

He was too distracted by Kang Seulgi that he didn’t notice Flute Girl approaching him. He flinched in surprise when a brown envelope was out to him. He looked up and in the nearness made out her face: Wendy Son, the Miss Perfect. She’s…well, she’s perfect.

Everybody likes her. She’s not only excellent-looking but is also loaded yet still humble and polite, excellent at both sports and academics, could sing and dance and play tons of musical instruments, speaks multiple languages, good at cooking—well, what can she not do? Virtually nothing, apparently.

And her presence was the last straw for Bogum to finally trust this dating agency fully. If the Wendy Son was involved, then what could go wrong?

He took the envelope, “What’s this?”

“The contract.” Wendy Son replied, walking back to her stool, “We’ll be giving you a week to think it over. Come back here next week, same day, same time, and give us your response,”

He nodded and made a mental note about that, “But—I have one last question. How much are you going to charge?”

Joy Park, back to leaning against the piano, gave him a rather cold smile, “I’m afraid you got it all wrong, sunbaenim. It’s not about how much we charge.

“It’s about what we charge.”