Jisoo wakes up with an odd feeling in the pit of her stomach; she can’t quite discern if it’s excitement or nerves. The first thought to cross her mind when she comes into consciousness is of Lisa.

I wonder if she read the note?

I wish I could have seen her reaction.

A smile spreads upon her lips at the thought of Lisa’s beaming grin when she imagines the younger girl first opening the package. She turns on her side and hugs the nearest pillow against her chest, hopelessly wishing the pillow was actually the girl she couldn’t get her mind off of. She releases a deep sigh and drags herself out of bed. She goes through her morning routine of getting ready and throws on an oversized graphic shirt before stepping out of her room, only to stop halfway out the threshold when she spots a half-asleep Lisa. She smiles at the sight of the younger girl trying to navigate her way around the dorm with her eyes still half-closed. Jisoo’s steps unconsciously bring her closer to the taller girl.

“Good morning, sleepy head,” she greets and wraps an arm around the younger girl’s waist to guide her to the dining table.

What Lisa mumbles back barely sounds like a good morning immediately followed by Jichu and Jisoo’s grin widens.

Just then, Jennie steps out of her room, wide awake and fully dressed, a small hopeful smile on her face because she finally has a schedule to keep her busy. The smile instantly fades when her eyes fall on Lisa and Jisoo being clingy so early in the morning. It’s bad enough that the last image on her mind when she went to sleep the previous night was one of those two hugging. Now, here she is, watching a similar scenario unfold right before her very eyes as soon as she sets foot outside the safe haven that is her bedroom. She huffs and tries to shake the negativity out of her head before plastering a smile on her face and proceeding on her way.

“Morning,” she swiftly strides past the pair and prepares herself a bowl of cereal, watching the other two occupants of the room from her peripheral vision.

Something about them irks her.

Ever since Jisoo confessed her feelings for Lisa, Jennie became hyper aware of the way the older girl behaved around their youngest.

Their interactions, no matter how small – they all mean something.

At least to Jisoo they do, Jennie thinks.

The way Jisoo softly runs her hand through Lisa’s morning hair in a vain attempt to get it into some semblance of order.

The way her hand strays past the younger girl’s hair to brush her neck and collarbone just so.

The soft look in her eyes and the smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

It all drives Jennie up the wall.

Not good, she thinks.

The realization of what she has kickstarted is finally hitting her and she can already feel her heart breaking into a million pieces at the very real possibility of watching them actually be together.

She hadn’t fully processed the outcome the deal would have. She knew Jisoo would be better off but she forgot to factor in the fact that she would have to watch Lisa drape herself all over Jisoo while the older girl smiled at her like she possessed everything she held dear in life. She forgot to factor in that Jisoo, upon seeing her affections slowly returned, would gladly hand over her beating heart to the younger girl.

She forgot to factor in her own very real and very painful human emotions.

From the corner of her eye, she sees Jisoo leave Lisa’s side and stroll into the kitchen to quickly prepare a bowl of fruits for them both. She silently watches as the older brunette goes back to sit by the red-head’s side and tries to nudge her awake – Lisa had momentarily rested her head on her arms and promptly fell back asleep.

If the smile that spreads upon Jisoo’s face and the light that reflects from within her eyes when her gaze falls on the sleeping face of the maknae is anything to go by… Jisoo is already lost.

She was never mine, a distant voice cries out in her head.

“Wake up, you zombie,” Jisoo nudges the red-head awake and Lisa groans in protest.

The elder girl chuckles and tucks a stray strand of hair behind Lisa’s ear, “You’re so cute,” Jisoo mumbles, surprising even herself.

Jealousy is clawing at Jennie’s throat with words that won’t come out. Can’t come out.

Her vision is getting blurry with unshed tears and she’s choking up on feelings that she can never speak of, at least not to her.

She swallows the lump in , blocks out the outside world, and starts counting down from one hundred in hopes of composing herself.

.

.

.

.

35

34

33

“-nie.”

31

30

29

“Unnie, what’s up with you?” Chaeyoung waves her hand in front of Jennie’s face and motions at her phone, “Your phone has been going off for a while now.”

Jennie takes one look at Chaeyoung and internally thanks all the gods that the younger girl didn’t see her earlier, when she was on the verge of crying.

“Thanks, Rosie,” she gives her a small smile and walks away to answer the call from one of their managers.

Chaeyoung simply nods and starts preparing what she considers to be a real breakfast rather than the cereal and fruits that the rest of her groupmates had. Lisa, who is now wide awake, stares after Jennie with a slight frown on her face. She’d been stealing quick side glances at the older girl while Jisoo was running her hands through her hair and prodding at her so she would feed herself. For a moment it looked like Jennie…

Was she about to cry?

“-so, I asked manager unnie if I could accompany you and she said yes!” Jisoo exclaims, b with excitement.

“Huh?” Lisa lightly shakes her head and returns her attention to the brunette sitting at her side.

“I mean,” Jisoo shrinks into herself, “unless you don’t want me to go?”

“What?” Lisa asks in confusion.

“If you rather I not be there it’s totally fine,” Jisoo manages a smile that utterly fails to reach her eyes, “I can just watch you on TV when it airs, so…”

No, it’s not fine, Lisa notes while taking account of the girl’s hunched shoulders and sad eyes.

“What are you talking about? Of course, I want you to come,” Lisa drapes an arm over the older girl’s shoulders, effectively pulling her into a side hug and pressing her lips to the brunette’s temple in a fleeting kiss. Jisoo instantly perks up, butterflies fluttering in her stomach and a light blush covering her cheeks at the unexpected kiss.

Chaeyoung chooses that exact moment to loudly set down her plate, containing a neatly prepared sandwich with some eggs and bacon on the side. She sits down in front of the two, effectively interrupting Jisoo’s loving stare and Lisa’s silly smile.

“So, everyone’s leaving me behind today?”

“You want to come along too? Seulgi is one of the participants, and I’m sure if you text your girlfriend she’ll be more than happy to show up,” Lisa gives her a sly smirk before adding, “to support Seulgi, of course.”

Jisoo quickly catches on, “Yea, Chaeng, don’t you miss her already? It’s been a whole,” she glances at the nearest clock and her grin widens,