--

Jongdae knocks on the door softly, but it echoes louder in the dead hallway. He hears a faint enter and approaches the door carefully. Inside the small dorm sits Kyungsoo, who’s diligently working away with devices spread on the table and one luminescent light perched above his head. His mouth is pulled into a concentrated frown as he skims texts. This is Kyungsoo at his best, Jongdae reasons, as he sees only an empty mug on his table with several spill ring staining the table.

Jongdae is gentle when he enters. “How’s it going?”

“Fine,” Kyungsoo sighs, and he rubs his face. Tired eyes don’t even reach Jongdae’s, instead just staring dully at the texts. Jongdae wishes he knew what was going on in his friend’s mind, but their thoughts don’t easily pass nowadays. Jongdae knows that Kyungsoo stays up more often and is called to more meetings nowadays. He feels the drain in Kyungsoo’s face. “Did you need something?”

Jongdae perks up with a hum, “Ah, yes. We were going out for some drinks tonight. It’s a celebration. We wanted to see if you’d like to join us?”

Kyungsoo keeps reading his text and flatly asks, “For what?”

Jongdae grimaces slightly, hesitating before he wills it out. “Well, Chanyeol passed another bill through the Senate for the War.”

“To be honest, I’d rather not,” Kyungsoo replies dryly, skimming his texts unfazed. Jongdae knew this would happen, Baekhyun and Chanyeol too. That’s why Jongdae was picked to convince Kyungsoo. He’s the closest to the cooped boy.

Jongdae begins gently again, “Soo, I know there’s been some tension between you and Chanyeol, but –“

“It’s not that.” Kyungsoo waves off. He finally sets down the device and actually looks at Jongdae. His eyes are strained, tired from reading all day. He’s pale from being stuck inside. He looks pretty miserable, if Jongdae was to be frank. “I’ve got a lot on my plate. I can’t afford any celebration right now.”

Jongdae wants to argue with him, but he can’t. Kyungsoo is stuck as a workaholic, and Jongdae knows he does great work. Jongdae stares, giving him a disappointed look, but Kyungsoo just stares back uninterested and tired. He knows Kyungsoo says it has nothing to do with Chanyeol, but Jongdae knows the other isn’t a great liar. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol used to be close – really close, actually, despite what a younger Kyungsoo’s denial. Somewhere down the line they just drifted apart, and it’s been strained ever since.

There’s nothing more that Jongdae could say to make it any better.

“Okay,” Jongdae cedes. He starts for the door. “You’ll be missed, you know.”

Jongdae makes steps toward to door when he’s stopped by Kyungsoo calling out harder, “Jongdae.”

He turns, watching Kyungsoo muster up something inside him. With kinder eyes and a gentle voice, he says, “Tell Chanyeol I said ‘congratulations’. He’s doing a good job. I mean it. I wish I could be there.”

“Will do,” Jongdae smiles softly. He presses to the door and gives his goodbye. “Have a good night.”

-

The nightlife of Tython is grungy and dark. It’s not cleanly or sophisticated, but they didn’t need that. They needed hard liquor and entertainment. It’s also Baekhyun’s favorite bar, and no one else gets a say in where they go.

Chanyeol had started before the Jedi came down to the city, mostly from the aftershocks of nerves after the results. Jongdae came down separately and Baekhyun came in tow with two young Padawans, each held by their ears.

As Baekhyun settles at the bar, the two bright eyed Padawans staring excitedly at the neon bar slide beside him. He drones, “I’m on babysitting duties tonight.”

A pink oozing drink comes out from the bartenders hand and the Padawans stare in awe. The brunette with wondrous eyes gasps, “That looks amazing.”

Baekhyun slaps him upside the head, and the Padawan rubs it. “No, Jongin. We talked about this. You’re Master would cut my balls off if I let you drink.”

The other Padawan with bright bleached locks gets a chuckle in his throat, and Baekhyun isn’t here for it. “Same goes for you, Sehun. You two look like fetuses anyway.”

Jongdae elbows Baekhyun and jokes, “Says the 22-year-old with a baby face.”

“Shut up,” Baekhyun grumbles lightly behind the rim of his glass.

The night goes smoothly. There’s laughter and a great atmosphere in this bar. Jongdae never refutes Baekhyun’s picks because they are in good taste. Sehun and Jongin, the two older Padawans and soon to be Knights, fit in with them seamlessly. Jongdae watches the younger ones bicker, their youth still clinging to them. Jongin acts cool in front of the older Knights, but ultimately is just a cute poser. And Sehun is sassy about most things, including the song choices of the karaoke bar.

Jongdae works around another shot and smiles to Chanyeol. “How did things go today?”

“I felt like a wreck today,” Chanyeol whines as he throws down another shot. He waives the humanoid bartender down again and flips him two more credits. Instantly, the bartender works on the round of doubles.

“You looked great on broadcast though. We streamed it at the Temple,” Jongin pipes up. Sehun is ogling the drink across the bar, and Baekhyun orders them both the tallest glasses of water. Jongdae laughs and gingerly pats Baekhyun. Under the touch, though, the other freezes.

“You okay?” Jongdae asks in a whisper, knowing the other doesn’t like it when the uncomfortable attention is drawn to him. Baekhyun doesn’t unfreeze.

“Just a little hot, that’s all,” Baekhyun says as he wipes the others hand off of his arm. Jongdae nods and starts to fan his friend. Baekhyun seems to ease up a little after the kind gesture. He’s been like this since their mission on Onderon. Jongdae had gotten over the initial shock of the kiss because Baekhyun just explained it as a one-time-thing. It’s been awkward though, where Jongdae normally touches, Baekhyun dodges away. Jongdae hopes it’s just a phase, and not something that has been festering.

“So, what’s the next step?” Jongdae asks Chanyeol, who is fidgeting for another drink. The Senator loosens up after a couple more in his system and is lax.

“Well, there’s a finalized process in a couple of weeks, but the bill should be processed within the month,” Chanyeol kindly takes the shots from the friendly bar tender again and hands Jongdae one. The two old friends clink the tiny glasses together and throw it back. Chanyeol growls underneath the burning liquor, while Jongdae chokes on it. It’s like a fire down his throat.

“This War will continue once again, thanks to the lovely sponsors of the Intergalatic face Squad,” Baekhyun jokes, raising his own shot in the air and sliding it down. He turns back to a bewildered Jongin and shrugs. “Eh, sorry kid.”

Jongdae comes to the rescue with a gentler touch, “If you’re not used to Baekhyun’s language now, I’m not sure you’ll pass being a Knight.”

“No offense Master Kim, but are you kidding me? I’ve heard lots worse.” Jongin’s look turns sour, eyes pitying beyond. “I’m just surprised Senator Chanyeol and Baekhyun are still friends with all those insults like that.”

“He knows I’m kidding.” Baekhyun laughs with an edge of bitterness behind it. He stirs around his drink until realization hits him. He turns his body in multiple directions, and spits out the question, “Where’s Sehun?”

Jongin groans, deflating in his seat. “He bailed on me. Said he was going to the chick in the corner.”

He jabs his thumb to the unsuspecting corner where two Twi’lek sisters have entranced the young blonde Padawan. Jongdae smiles toward Baekhyun and gently commands, “Go save him, please. Before he regrets it.”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes and slams his drink down. “Fine.”

Jongdae watches as Baekhyun stomps over into the dark corner, and chuckles when Baekhyun turns into a drunk father. He’s demanding with a flair, a parody of his Masters style. It’s funny how Baekhyun tells the girls off smoothly and then cradles Sehun like a baby bird. How nurturing.

Jongin makes friends with a local group near the shuffle boards. Jongdae remembers him and Baekhyun attempting to play several times in one night. They weren’t exactly sober, and Baekhyun insisted on teaching Jongdae. He would wrap his arms around the others to position him correctly, and whisper encouragements in his ear.

Tonight, though, is not like those nights. Now that Jongdae really thinks about it, Baekhyun has been like this for weeks. Baekhyun is standoffish, freezing at Jongdae’s friendly touch and brushes it off with an excuse. In these moments, Jongdae can sense a chaotic internal conflict within his friend, but there’s no time to confront it. Honestly, Jongdae is a little scared of what might come out of it. The unknown is terrifying.

While Baekhyun fights off the Twi’lek’s, Jongdae shakes off his thoughts and turns his attention more towards Chanyeol. He looks a bit down, not in the least bit sober. Jongdae knows the others thoughts like his own, and he knows that Chanyeol is drowning himself in a hole.

“Hey,” Jongdae pats Chanyeol. He gives a light smile. “Sorry Kyungsoo couldn’t make it. I know you wanted him here. But, he says congratulations and that you’re doing a good job.”

Chanyeol hums and draws unenthused, “Whatever.”

“I’m not lying,” Jongdae scoffs, and leans in more to speak under his breath. “He cares, you know.”

Chanyeol downs his drink, not caring about Jongdae’s sincerity. He’s so low, his heart is speaking right into his mouth. He shakes his head and shrugs. “If he cared, he would take the stick out of his and talk to me himself.”

Jongdae isn’t sure what to say and he sits in an uncomfortable silence. Chanyeol groans but two seconds later with regret in his throat, “No, no. I shouldn’t have said that. That wasn’t –“

“It’s what you felt,” Jongdae gently says, placing a hand on his friend’s shoulder. Chanyeol shakes his head again, and grumbles intelligibly. He goes for another hard liquor double when Jongdae plucks it out of his hands. He scolds, “Ah! No more. You’re being broadcasted tomorrow.”

Jongdae lets it ride down his throat, burning along the way. Chanyeol whines when Jongdae starts laughing, only for it to turn infectious. They have grown apart in their transitionary times, but they’ve reignited contact after Chanyeol navigated his way up the ranks. He’s done plenty of favors for Senators leagues above him. After every successful bill under his belt, Chanyeol no longer stood in the afterglow of his father’s passing. Instead, he struck his own legacy, and he may even surpass his own fathers in the time to come.

They simmer down, mellowing in time. Memories pass languidly and Chanyeol’s drunken stupor slips away. He’s still sad, eyes downcast and watery. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol’s relationship was always sidelined, mostly because Jongdae didn’t want to involve himself in the strong emotions between the two, but now he feels bad. He never really paid much attention to them, and now it feels like he’s too late to the game. Jongdae tries to reassure him because it seems like it was the right thing to do.

“You two will reconcile, there’s time for it,” Jongdae says gently, tussling the others hair. “This will pass.”

In the somber moment, there’s an eerie melody playing in Jongdae’s mind. It’s familiar, a folk song that he’s heard through whistles when he was a Youngling. It bristles like wind against the garden tree leaves. Nature fills the gaps. Rushing water calms the beat as white noise dilution. Strength fills behind the voice of the now droning melodic hum. The voice swells against Jongdae’s temple, and familiarity is on the tip of his tongue. Just one moment more, and the Jedi would remember the owner.

But it all ends in a flash, and Jongdae’s skin crawls within the deafening silence.

“You alright?” another voice sounds so far away. Jongdae blinks into awareness to get out of his head and is faced with Chanyeol’s concerned look. His hand is still nested into Chanyeol’s styled locks. He reels it back and apologizes.

“I’m fine,” Jongdae smiles to hide it all. Jongdae feels he can’t put this melody up to coincidence, but he really isn’t sure that anything is certain.

“Jeez,” Chanyeol whines, slumping down onto the bar top. He nurses a glass of water. “This night is turning into a bummer.”

“Sorry.”

“No, no. It’s not you. It’s me. I’m bringing the mood down, ‘cause I’m ing,” He breathes shakily. “ …. Exhausted.”

Chanyeol groans irritably, downing his water to sober him up. The drinks are hitting hard, Jongdae can practically hear the Senator’s thoughts swaying. It’s all thoughts about their wide-eyed friend. “I just ...miss him.”

“I know.”

Jongdae pats his friend on the back, the night for the them is ending shortly. The Jedi rounds up the giddy Padawan from the shuffleboard table and makes his way to the exit. Not a moment later, a smug looking Baekhyun and a ticked off Sehun stroll away from two flirty Twi’leks blowing them kisses. It looks all familiar, and Jongdae’s heart softens just a little.

“This little almost got roped into a scam,” Baekhyun huffs like a parent, dragging Sehun’s attention away from the gorgeous women waving goodbye. Jongdae intercepts the Padawan before he makes an escape. “Pretty sure it was a -slave trade thing.”

Sehun grumbles something about ‘being an adult’ and ‘making his own decisions’, but it’s ignored. Jongdae snorts, “And you know this because …?”

Baekhyun grins proudly, “Well, they hit on me too.”

Sehun scrunches his face, confused. He knocks his fist lightly against the Knights chest. “They were being polite. They told me you were too old.”

Chanyeol’s doubling over, laughing crazily. Jongdae gets in a loud bark of a laugh, but Baekhyun sits frustrated. Chanyeol practically screams through the laugh, “You’re too old!”

“Am not! I’m perfectly fine for anyone, any age,” Baekhyun shouts right back, red in the face. Embarrassment flushes around him as realization hits. “Uh, not like that… you know what I mean! I’m hot too!”

Jongin rolls his eyes. “Yeah, we get it. You want the whole Galaxy’s approval?”

Sehun says and looks menacingly, “No, just Master Jongdae’s.”

Jongdae blinks up to Baekhyun in surprise, because there was no way he didn’t hear it. Baekhyun is beet red and looks like he’s about to strangle the younger one. He’s stammering through a threat, and Jongdae thinks it’s rather endearing. It reminds him of the older days, where they were younger and emotions were bright. Nowadays, their emotions feel too in control and robotic. It’s refreshing.

Jongdae gives a light laugh to ease the tension. He smiles gently to his friend who can barely look him in the eye. He says sweetly and sincerely, “I’m not sure why anyone wouldn’t want you. You’re cute.”

There’s a waterfall of coos from the menacing duo and Chanyeol, and a blushing Baekhyun grumbles and stomps away rather cutely.

“Ya’ll can get a ride home yourselves!”

-

“Kyungsoo Do. You are requested before the Council.”

The Knight groans, rubbing his tired eyes until he can feel the pressure on his sockets. It’s been a long night full of research and paperwork. The Council has been providing him with special missions – ones with substantial evidence that could bring this War to an end. Kyungsoo wants to believe that his hard work will lead to something. Hope is dangerous, but it is what drives him.

However, this night did not end with many conclusions. There were a lot of unanswered questions, and unfortunately, not a lot of evidence. He would not have much to report to the Council, and he is disappointed in himself that he does not have anything of worth to report. Just another rehashing of old events with no justice.

He dusts himself off and straightens his robes. The Council room is not far from his quarters, just a walk down the corridors. He passes the mess hall which is silent and empty like most nights. He’s been forced to eat meals at terrible hours, leaving the Knight in silence and solitude. There’s just a little bit of Kyungsoo that craves some conversation – even if it was just Chanyeol. At least with that, Kyungsoo would feel a little less lonely.

Kyungsoo enters the Council room to have all members out of place. Some of the Masters look like they’ve just woken up, distraught and tired. Others sit with their eyes drooped to the ground. Kyungsoo wonders if this time of night was really the best time for an impromptu update meeting.

Kyungsoo approaches, back stiff as a board and proper. The Council members acknowledge him and return to their seats. The room air is thick and hesitant, something Kyungsoo doesn’t normally deal with in these situations. No one, not even the Grand Master, speaks an introduction. It’s quiet and awkward, and going on for far too long. Kyungsoo has learned from Baekhyun that if you want to get something done, it’s better to do it yourself.

He speaks first, “Hello Council. I’m sorry, but I do not have anything new to report. I’ve referenced every text for any collaboration with Eko and the bandit groups – including Silo, but I do not have solid evidence. If I can make a suggestion, perhaps I should return to Onderon myself to have a closer look at the station.”

The Council members do not speak. They look to each other in crisis, but none of them say a word. Their faces are distraught, pulled in a way that makes Kyungsoo uncomfortable and nervous. His skin is crawling, hair standing on edge.

Kyungsoo bravely swallows, “Is that not what you’d like?”

The Council members look to the Grand Master, but he seems focused on something else entirely. Master Shiik is on the edge of his seat, Andula’s eyes try to meet with the Grand Master. Master Obrec, with his ghostly face, sinks deeper into his seat, as if to escape. Only Master Junmyeon dares to even look at the Knight. Kyungsoo isn’t sure if he appreciates it by the way the Master’s sunken in eyes stare sadly at him. In a flash, they flicker to the ground, and Kyungsoo feels terrible.

Finally, Grand Master Pho speaks, voice composed, “No, Kyungsoo. This does not deal with your report. We called you in for an entirely different reason.”

Kyungsoo tries to stand a little taller, even if it was impossible. His arms are clamped behind him, one hand interlaced with his wrist. He feels a wicked storm coming.

“There is no easy way to say this. Your Master… -“

Kyungsoo’s Master, Master Mamoru Bali – the Kyuzo warrior, is one of the greatest Jedi fighters in this century. He’s been the Temple’s trainer for years, but in the recent half decade, he’s been reassigned to active duty on the War front. His recent trip was to Malastare where he oversaw the Senator and the recent victories on the planet. He was scheduled to return shortly.

“ – his body was found in the main river of Malastare’s capital this morning.”

Kyungsoo feels absolutely numb.

He tightens the grip on his wrist until he no longer feels the pain, his skin white with frustration. A hot breath presses through is nose, trying best to conceal his shaky throat. His teeth are clenched behind his lips to resist the emotions regurgitating up. His eyes, though, are the windows to his soul, and he can no longer fake his cold stare. He flickers his eyes to the ground, and even goes as far as to bend his head down a little to shade his eyes.

There’s absolute silence in the room as the devastating news circulates. Kyungsoo’s mind keeps playing to the images of his Master where it was younger and happier days. Finishing a battle, Kyungsoo would get critiques of his performance to make him stronger. Yet, when the younger Kyungsoo would fail, his Master would always encourage him to never give up. This was the man Kyungsoo always wanted to be, and yet his presence is fleeting and mortal.

The Grand Master speaks again, but Kyungsoo is not ready to listen. A memory floods behind Kyungsoo’s eyelids. His Master sits within the Temple’s garden, admiring the flora around him. A younger Kyungsoo quietly approaches, watching his young Master. The Kyuzo leaves his giant hat on, shielding himself from the bright sun beams. His respirator still clings onto to his face as he breathes and circulates the Tython air to better match a suitable air. His eyes stay closed though, young Kyungsoo notices, as the Padawan inches closer to his Master.

Inside his Masters hands is a small bird, calm and breathing. Kyungsoo recognizes the bird, it had been injured earlier morning and was flopping inside the gardens grounds. Before, Kyungsoo ran for his Master, almost crying, as the bird scrambled around in his tiny hands. His Master took it gently and now it sleeps peacefully in his hands.

“You were not meant for this world.” His Masters voice is still fresh in his mind as the young Padawan, with tears in his eyes, begs him to revive the bird.

Kyungsoo peels his eyes open and he lets the Grand Master’s voice spill in. He catches bits and pieces.

“Suspected foul play, but nothing too sure…. the Senator is to be questioned.”

Master Bali went to Malastare alone with one droid companion. The Senator of Malastare, Senator Bwageel, is an intergalactic celebrity nowadays. He has been known to publicly criticize the Jedi and many others that don’t play exactly by his rules. Kyungsoo knows in his heart that anyone is capable of murder, especially a conniving Senator. Although the autopsy has to prove if there was any murder, Kyungsoo can already feel the burn of something evil.

There’s silence amongst the Council members now. Kyungsoo finds his voice, head still bent, “When will the funeral be arranged?”

There’s some concerned looks among the members as Kyungsoo flicks his eyes to their reactions. The Grand Master is stoic, and Kyungsoo supposes someone in that position has to be. He speaks gently, “The body will be returned today and a completed autopsy will be performed. Tomorrow will be the funeral.”

Kyungsoo’s heart sinks. It’s real, it’s all too real. He knows it would come eventually, but the day has come sooner than he’d like it. He’s really gone.

Kyungsoo has to hold it all back in front of the elite members. He clenches again as another wave of emotions floods him. He’s rigid and fighting hard. “May I be dismissed?”

It’s chilling and cold, and it pierces the silence completely. After a paused moment, emotions hot in the air, the Grand Master gives in. “Yes, you are dismissed.”

The Knight turns on his heel without a look to the members. One look from Master Junmyeon, and Kyungsoo might have burst into a mess of tears. He doesn’t look back, he bursts through the Council doors and down the corridor to the hangar.

He runs. He runs faster than he’s ever done before. He fights the tears streaming down his face and screams at the morning sun bursting over the mountain ranges.

-

Jongdae feels this terrible pit in his stomach. He watches as the carried casket of the late Master floats across the gardens ethereal like. The Temple gardens are held in a somber whisper of smoke and memories. Only one casket is before them, much different from the War almost 20 years ago. Back then, three or four rituals were performed in a night, with three Jedi each. It still carries the same feeling, remembrance and the strength to continue with their mission. Restoration of peace within the Galaxy is no easy feat and is not without sacrifice, they say.

Baekhyun stands next to him, quietly brooding. Jongdae can feels gurgles of emotions tugging within the other. It’s understandable – these are emotional times. These times are also the most vulnerable for them. Built up emotions clouds ones judgement, and evil always lurks behind each corner. It’s ready to swallow up those who have no other way.

Kyungsoo stands tall amongst the Council at the head of the podium. His chin is up, eyes trained like a soldier. Jongdae feels sorry for his friend with tragedy in his wake. He hasn’t been there for Kyungsoo these past months, probably years. Kyungsoo has drowned himself in work and crams solo missions whenever he has the chance. There’s been many times where Jongdae has woken for breakfast and passes a half-dead Kyungsoo crawling into bed from late night work. Even though his conscience tells him to cater his friend, the other voice pulls him away and tells the Knight that everything will be fine - everything passes eventually.

The casket makes another round across the floor of the gardens when Jongdae hears Baekhyun produce a growl of frustration. Baekhyun’s lips are pulled into a frown, and he whispers, “Chanyeol should be here for Kyungsoo. Drop this stupid feud for once.”

“Chanyeol can’t be here. This is for the Jedi only.” Jongdae throws a look to Baekhyun to settle down, even though it’s a lousy excuse. As for the feud, Kyungsoo and Chanyeol’s friendship has drifted apart with the true reason unknown to anyone else. There are just some things that should be kept to themselves, even if no one else agrees. “He also had to report to the Senate for his bill.

Baekhyun bristles between his teeth, “A bill can wait. Kyungsoo’s Master died, for God’s sake. If he cared at all, he’d do something about it – like investigate the murder or–“

“Jongdae, Baekhyun,” Master Jonghyun approaches behind them, resting his hands on each of their shoulders. Jongdae tenses underneath and mutters a greeting to his Master. Baekhyun does the same, but with a little less shame.

Jonghyun doesn’t leave the two alone. Instead, he settles between them, separating the two friends. The ritual is beginning, and silence overcomes the garden. The casket is laid in the center stage waiting for its trial. Jongdae watches his Master secretly and notices that his eyes cannot focus on the body before them. Jonghyun and Master Bali were close, as they were in the same Youngling group and trained together. Kyungsoo and Jongdae became even closer when their Masters brought them to train together. Their bond was a strong one within the brotherhood.

“Show respect for the dead. It’s the least you can do,” Master Jonghyun’s words are chilling. Jongdae lifts his eyes up to his Master submissively to see him staring directly at the now burning body in the center. Red hot flames flicker at his features. “I’d be ashamed if I was spoken about with little regard at my own funeral.”

Jongdae feels the disappointment scraping down his throat raw. Jongdae flickers his eyes back to the body burning with the sunset and turning to ash agonizingly slow. His Master continues his assault, growling, “Master Menka as well.”

There’s raw emotions in the air tonight. He can hear it in the strain of Jonghyun’s voice, and the anger bubbling against Baekhyun’s lips. Jongdae can even feel it in himself, the way the fire burns this pit in his stomach. Jongdae’s hopes that these emotions burn tonight and are extinguished tomorrow.

The young Knight gazes up to the Council and Kyungsoo up on the podium. They look angelic up there, stoic and ethereal. Kyungsoo has a streak of the flame casting a shadow over his face. His jaw is stiff, and he stands proudly as a statue. He doesn’t look to the body, his gaze casting over the brotherhood. He looks absolutely lifeless and foreign to anyone.

Jongdae can feel his own eyes well up in tears. His friend is no longer the Kyungsoo Jongdae once knew. Instead, he looks like a determined General, like Jongdae’s father.

“Nothing has changed,” Master Jonghyun says beneath the roar of the flames. They flash against their face, warming their bodies. “We will continue in his name.”

-

Not even a month later, everything feels back to normal at the Temple. The gardens are cleared of Master Bali’s ash, and flowers grow in its wake. The Council has replaced the trainer with two more Masters with specialties in fighting techniques, both hand-to-hand and weaponry. Scholars and Knights alike continue with their missions and reports. The War continues.

Even though the Temple has seemed to go back to normal, Baekhyun doesn’t feel like that at all. Kyungsoo is off doing his own thing, and he never shows his face around. It’s as if he’s disappeared and buried himself in off-world missions. Chanyeol also has not shown up on Tython in the past month. He’s been making a lot of broadcast appearances recently because of his successful bill. When Baekhyun calls, the Senator claims to be buried in work on Naboo.

And then there’s Jongdae.

There has been conflict within Baekhyun for a long time, but it has been mostly buried heavily underneath repression. However, it has become more apparent after the Onderon mission. Baekhyun acted on his feelings on the jungle planet, and ever since then he’s been craving taste again. Before this, he had kept things to himself. But now, every time he bites his lips, he wants to feel that press. It’s so dangerous and consuming, but it’s delicious.

Baekhyun has been avoiding Jongdae as much as possible because of it. He knows it’s a dangerous thing to act on, so he pushes away the source. He had done it when he was a teen and it seemed to work just fine.

A slight problem has risen, however. Jongdae notices that Baekhyun is avoiding him. Whenever Baekhyun turns a corner, Jongdae is there with eyes confused and wanting an answer. But the other Knight can never say the dangerous things that are in his heart. If he says them aloud, they might come true. And if they come true, Baekhyun’s fate will be sealed. He’ll be living fully in his sin, swallowed up by his temptations, and thrown away from the Jedi Order.

Baekhyun’s been getting good at hiding. He offers many Senators rides back their planet as a chauffeur, or trains with Padawans as much as he can. He’s even resorted to being an aid in the Jedi kitchen. Gunther appreciates it well enough. They’ve always had an understanding between each other. They are the underdogs after all.

Baekhyun sweeps the back of the house near the ovens. It’s been a long day. Baekhyun’s baked over 60 loaves of bread for the next morning and wiped down every surface. He’s been doing this every night for the past couple of weeks, and Gunther has always thanked him every night. The lead chef never asked why Baekhyun does it, and Baekhyun carries on.

This night, Gunther watches the young Jedi sweep the area. Baekhyun can feel the reptilian eyes glued on him as he bends to sweep. Baekhyun doesn’t want a target on his back, so he gives in and presses the chef. He asks, “Is there something you wanted?”

Gunther pauses, and then gives a grand smile. He chuckles, “You’re paranoid.”

“I’m not,” Baekhyun argues, setting his brush down. He builds a wall around himself with a smirk of his own. “What makes you say that?”

“You’re avoiding something.” Baekhyun’s stomach drops, but he blows it off carelessly. Gunther scoffs, “You’re not down here because you like me. You come down here when you want an escape. I know that all too well, Jedi.”

Baekhyun grits his teeth at the sound of his title. It burns this guilty feeling in him. He doesn’t show it, forcing himself to bark a haughty laugh instead to hide his true feelings. It’s been full proof his entire life. He wanders with secrets unbeknownst to the eyes of the Jedi. Most aren’t that perceptive. Most don’t ask the right questions, but Gunther doesn’t need to. He knows that something is up.

The Besalisk squints at the boy, analyzing him. “I know the difference between a good and a bad liar, boy. Your silence is very telling.”

Like the chef has said many times before, he doesn’t need Jedi mind tricks or the Force to sense things. He knows things that aren’t so readily perceived. He’s got street smarts, the intellect that you can’t get from reading a book. It involves body language, tonality, words (spoken or unspoken), and, of course, trust. Baekhyun knows this well, he was left on a desert planet alone.

“Your friend came running down here before. The one you like. He was looking for you.” The Besalisk searches Baekhyun’s face for reaction, and Baekhyun has to fight off the blush prickling at his skin. Was it so obvious?

The chef eggs on, “It’s him, isn’t it? You’re avoiding him.”                                      

Baekhyun doesn’t need to say anything, he’s already caught in the reptile’s trap. He starts working on the floors again to not further embarrass himself, but the chef continues with a sigh, “Well, you’re not the first to do it. Love can make the smartest man stupid.”

That’s what Baekhyun’s afraid of. These feelings, love – as Gunther calls it, make him out of the ordinary. The tales of Jedi forming close attachments with these feelings always end poorly, as told by history. If Baekhyun acts on it, he’s doomed. If he doesn’t act on them, he might explode. But if he buries it deep down inside, maybe he can avoid all this conflict. It’s not easy.

“Really, I don’t care,” the chef says indifferently. Baekhyun knows better, even if the words still sting. That Besalisk cares more about Baekhyun than he does his own brother, and that’s saying a lot. The chef shrugs. “You’ll do the right thing.”

Baekhyun isn’t entirely sure what the right thing to do was. There are many paths, and Baekhyun can only see destruction at the end of all of them. Ultimately, the decision is his. He could take the path where he buries his feelings and destroys himself over this burden. Or he could take the path where the ending has been told over and over again in history. This path of love and devotion will ultimately leave him grasping at the little Light he has.

A little spark of joy flickers, and Baekhyun’s heart rises. Perhaps, he could break the mold. It’s worth a shot.

-

Baekhyun rings out his hands nervously as he approaches the corridor leading to the other Jedi quarters. He’s gotten used to the jittery nerves, since his heart leaps every time Jongdae does a brilliant flash of a smile. His breath is easing, but he knows that it will get caught in his throat many times this night.

He approaches carefully to the familiar dorm room. This is where Jongdae eats, sleeps, and dreams. Baekhyun hopes that there may be enough room for him in there too. He takes a few moments to hype himself up, his heart fluttering at his thoughts. He has something prepared, but he might choke on it and adlib. Right now, he has to embrace this fear and bend it to his will. Fear will guide him to his bravery.

He knocks on the grey paneled door and listens. At first, there isn’t a sound, and a dread swells in Baekhyun’s chest. A small enter gives Baekhyun hope. He presses the door and it slides to reveal two familiar Jedi faces. One is Jongdae’s, as expected, with surprise etched into his face. The other is an unimpressed Kyungsoo that follows Baekhyun’s movements.

Baekhyun looks to Jongdae and finally catches his voice, “Jongdae, may I speak to you?”

“Of course,” Jongdae replies automatically, like it’s always been an option. His voice lights in slight excitement, and a semi-smile casts a warm place for the other to stay in. Baekhyun feels frozen though, especially with Kyungsoo’s expectant stare. It’s like he knows that Baekhyun is about to do something damning, and he can only watch the train wreck in front of his eyes.

Baekhyun nervously flickers his eyes to both Knights, and almost whispers, “In private.”

A little recognition forms on Jongdae’s face, but he isn’t automatically excusing himself. Instead, he looks to Kyungsoo, silently asking. Baekhyun isn’t sure what took place here, but he imagines that it was some reconciliation. They’ve always been friends, nothing more. Their conversation must have been important if they are hesitating to leave.

“Give us a moment,” Kyungsoo finally says flatly, but his eyes flicker sadly to the ground. Baekhyun’s anxious heart slows and observes his friend only for another moment. He’s curled up in blankets, black hair disheveled, and a pale face long and tired. He looks so vulnerable.

Baekhyun nods and dismisses himself from the room to wait outside. In the corridor, he cannot hear much of anything. They speak in whispers, and that’s when Baekhyun’s paranoia nibbles away at him. He knows it’s irrational, but he has the right to be think freely. His two friends could be speaking about anything – about themselves, about him, about the future. Yet, Baekhyun’s mind harps on the outrageous possibility that they already know his confession and how to get rid of him.

“Hey.” The voice promptly snaps Baekhyun out of his swirling thoughts. Jongdae gently presses the door closed as he enters the hallway. All Baekhyun can think about is that this is real, and this is really happening.

Jongdae gives the softest smile he can muster, and even that makes Baekhyun’s skin crawl. The Knight offers, “Can I safely assume this conversation shouldn’t be in a hallway?”

Baekhyun finally nods, and leads them down to his room, just another hallway away. Jongdae follows closely behind, and Baekhyun can feel his stare. Baekhyun could get out of this if he really wanted to, it’s just a step away from turning around and giving him a just kidding!

But his hand is already pressed against his door, and the lights already flicker on in his room. The two Knights enter the dorm, and the door closes behind them. The world is shut out, and it’s just the two of them standing in a room. There’s nothing complicated. Baekhyun takes a seat on his bed, and Jongdae takes the chair across from it. Silence fills the normally rambunctious room. Baekhyun feels like he’s choking.

After a few brave heaves, Baekhyun can finally breathe, “Thanks for coming.”

“No problem.” Jongdae’s smile is gentle and cautious. He attempts to catch Baekhyun’s eyes and asks, “What did you want to talk about?”

Baekhyun is trying to find his words, the ones he prepared, but it’s all getting mixed up in his head. The smile, his gentle touch – it’s all making him crazy. He makes a sound of frustration, “I’m not very good with this.”

Jongdae is patient, however. He doesn’t respond verbally, but his body calls to him. His eyes wait, and his smile is kind. His posture is comfortable and reaching. Before, there were attempts to touch the other Knight to soothe him, but Jongdae keeps his hands to himself. It’s probably for the best.

Baekhyun scratches his head as a distraction until he feels an urge of confidence. His mouth forms the words that he’s prepared, “There’s been a lot going on recently. Lots of emotions strung high. I just need an outlet from it all, you know?”

He breathes outward forcefully, and bravery leads him. His hands gently reach Jongdae’s, his thumb brushing against his friends skin. Baekhyun takes a brave look in his friends eyes and revels in the sweet warmness it brings him. He twitches a smile and sincerely says, “I like you a lot.”

Curious eyes turn to realization and Jongdae’s face warms to his former self. He almost laughs, but stops himself. He leans into Baekhyun’s hand and tilts his head cutely. His lips are doubtful, though. He’s gentle in his refusal, “Oh, Baekhyun. I’m flattered, really, but there are plenty of others that could a better job. I don’t think I could provide you that type of company you need tonight.”

Oh no. This is all wrong, Baekhyun realizes, and it’s a sinking feeling.

Jongdae unwinds his hands and smooths Baekhyun’s skin in an attempt to soothe his wounded pride. Baekhyun swats it away and releases Jongdae. The other is confused in the moment, and Baekhyun can smell the first bite of fear. This is going terribly wrong.

“No, I don’t mean that. You’re worth so much more than a one-night stand,” Baekhyun’s words fly out of his mouth now, excited to redeem himself. But, he feels as if he’s dug another hole when Jongdae dips his face in a confused scrunch. There’s a little restrain, and the words slip out in a whisper, “You’re worth so much to me.”

The silence is deafening, and leaves Baekhyun feeling so exposed. He watches and waits. Jongdae’s confusion slowly turns into damning realization. The other Knight looks almost guilty, even though he did nothing wrong.

“You’re about to do something dangerous,” Jongdae says sadly, and Baekhyun almost feels relief that he knows what’s about to happen.

I know, but it’s something I must do.

“I love you,” Baekhyun finally breathes, and it feels damning as well as good. “I’ve felt this way for a long time. I know it’s wrong, but I can’t help myself. I thought I’d go mad if I didn’t say it.”

The lights flicker in Baekhyun’s room as he growls with emotions flaring. His body pulls up, and he’s pacing around with anxiety in his soles. Jongdae stands as well, but he’s guarded. He watches Baekhyun silently, a sad frown on his lips. Baekhyun feels like he’s on fire with all these confessions of something so tragic, it’s hurts. This is for his own good, though. He needs this release, otherwise he would have definitely felt the effects of the Dark side.

Baekhyun circulates this reckless behavior by pacing, kicking up a whirlwind of emotions that comes from far left. He’s panicked, in love, and all in between. His voice cracks down, and the lights are pulsating above them. Jongdae’s face is flickering between the light and dark patches from the overheads blinking. His skin is delectable, eyes round and wide, and lips curled with a harmless expression. “You must love me too, don’t you?”

Before Baekhyun knows it, he’s trapped the other against a wall. The Jedi feels dangerously hot being so close. He’s desperate and reaching, and Jongdae does nothing to stop it. It feels wrong and right, and Baekhyun isn’t sure which way to go. The tirade of emotions is ripping him apart.

He touches Jongdae, hands cupping his face. He forces the other to look at him just to somehow feel something relatable. Baekhyun can feel Jongdae’s pulse underneath his fingertips, and it’s loud and hammering. He’s nervous, but so is Baekhyun. The lights shut off with an incredible energy surge, but the two don’t even flinch, anticipating it. Darkness falls on the two Jedi, and there’s only shallow breaths between them.

“I want you,” Baekhyun says within the dark and kisses Jongdae. He puts pressure on it until the back of Jongdae’s head hits the wall. It’s hungry and dominating. It’s a hunger that’s been insatiable until tonight, and Baekhyun swells with determination. Underneath him, Jongdae does kiss back, but definitely not as forcefully, but that doesn’t slow the hungry Jedi down. Baekhyun pushes more until his body just moves to his own accord and completes his burning desires. When he into Jongdae’s mouth without even a single thought, he knows he has abandoned the Light.

It ends abruptly when Jongdae uses the Force to push Baekhyun back, his own strength not enough. Baekhyun’s body knocks back, stumbling to the bed. He regains his balance against the bed frame and squints to see through the darkness. He cannot see Jongdae, but he can hear his breath catching in his throat and a quiet cry of frustration. Regret sinks in, and Baekhyun feels his actions were almost animalistic.

“Stop this,” Jongdae cries back through the thickening silence. “We can’t do this.”

The terrible regret that comes over him is outstanding, and Baekhyun is stammering. The lights are flickering back, and a timid Jongdae approaches Baekhyun carefully. Baekhyun feels responsible for this, and guilt comes in waves.

Jongdae stops just in front of him, and stands a little unsure. He’s been caught off guard. His voice is small, warding off Baekhyun’s sputter of regret, “I’m afraid, Baekhyun. The way you’re talking about this, it’s dangerous. The want, the need – that’s steps away from the Dark side.”

“ – I … I don’t know – I don’t know what happened. This wasn’t supposed to…,” Baekhyun chokes up, feeling the weight of his actions sits on him heavily. He feels this darkness swirl in him, things he’s read from ancient texts of the self-damnation. He acted on it without even thinking twice. No, he reasoned, he needed to do this, or else he’d explode with missed opportunities. Either way, he was doomed.

He tries to retreat, taking back this horrible mess he’s caused himself. Jongdae doesn’t say anything either, and Baekhyun feels lost without his patient guidance. Jongdae always knew the right thing to say, no matter what. He’s a saint, and something Baekhyun should have never tried to fall in love with. He’s ruined it, the poor Jedi thinks to himself.

“It’s how you feel, Baekhyun. Don’t try to deny your feelings. It’ll only hurt you,” Jongdae says, though his eyes don’t reach Baekhyun’s quite yet. He’s scolding like a father, and Baekhyun knows that he has more to say. Jongdae is careful with his words with most people, Baekhyun knows this throughout the years. However, between the two of them, Jongdae shares his inner thoughts with the Kamar boy more than most others. Maybe it’s tied with Kyungsoo, but Baekhyun has never felt the repressed treatment. Jongdae is straight, to the point. It feels awkward being on the end of such repressed words.

“I was just so surprised by your force…I guess I should have saw this coming.”

Baekhyun widens his eyes. “You knew?”

Jongdae wraps a delicate hand around Baekhyun’s bicep. It’s a soothing gesture from all the high-strung emotions. His eyes are glazed over with something, like he’s known it all along, like a God. Jongdae, in this moment, is the kindest thing Baekhyun has found. The air is light and forgiving, unlike the shamefulness in other Master’s eyes. The Knight curls his lips into a gentle smile even with fear beating in his chest. “You need to own and control your feelings. I’m willing to help, if you’re willing to try.”

This isn’t entirely what Baekhyun expected, but he wasn’t really thinking straight anyway. From all their repressed emotions, he was expecting total exile from his Jedi strict ways. Or even hoping for a rarer confession to spill from his friends lips. But then what? Well, Baekhyun didn’t think that far in advanced. Though, this outcome seems to be a neutral third.

While Jongdae’s hand slips away, Baekhyun takes it up in his own and smooths the soft skin, all the way to his fingertips. Jongdae isn’t broken by the damning fate, instead embracing it like it’s just a small obstacle. He’s just that kind and unbreakable. There’s still sadness welled inside him that hides behind his smile, and Baekhyun knows this is hard on the other. Baekhyun nods, accepting this fate.

Jongdae lifts his serious eyes to Baekhyun. “We’ll take this slow and carefully, working together. Limit yourself, and the hunger will be sated. The rawness will eventually dissipate.”

Baekhyun’s previous actions come to light, and he feels overwhelmed by the guilt again. He breaks, “I… I forced myself on you. I’m sorry.”

“We’ll work slowly.” Jongdae smiles sadly, the assault still fresh in his mind. He’s gentle in his wording, “I won’t let you be consumed. I love you too much for that to happen.”

Baekhyun blinks, his mouth hanging open in a perplexed expression. He feels like his heart is going to burst out of his chest and spill onto the floor, he’s so nervous. He has an embarrassed rattle in his voice, “Y-you … Love? Me?”

The other smiles really cutely, warm and endearing-like. There’s a blush on his face as he confesses with a sigh, “I do. Just not …like this. But we’ll work on it. Our future is everchanging.”

He lifts his hands out of Baekhyun’s embrace and pats Baekhyun on the cheek lightly. His eyes are tired, but full of a bright spark. Baekhyun likes the look of it. It’s a long, rough path, but it’s a future he wants to live in. Together, with Jongdae.

“Goodnight, Baekhyun. May your heart finally be at ease.”

A/N: Posted a little early for your viewing pleasure (I also wasn't going to be near a computer any time near the regular posting time ...^^)

*In advanced: Sorry bae for Master Bali!! ;_; 

Wow, just a lot in this chapter, huh? Sorry for a lot of POV changes and time changes! ...Here's a little introduction of Padawans Jongin and Sehun, the mischief makers. Also a little introduction into Kyungsoo's secret missions. We've got tragic chansoo friendship, tragic kyungsoo, and a little uplifting baekchen. Woof. Was it what you were expecting? What more trouble can these boys get into? Find out next week. See you then! :D