Nothing but a single soul walked along the banks of the Han river.

Sojung had been walking around endlessly since she walked out the dorm. That was three hours ago. The members had rang multiple of times to no avail as she had her phone turned off. She needed to ignore everything for a while in order to sort out her thoughts.

Perhaps it would be okay to say that her heart and mind reflected the darkness of what would be a dark shade of blue of the river. 

She planned to go home, to her mother, tonight. But before that, she decided to make a choice between two choices. A choice that she wouldn't back out of.

A replay of little Eunbi's words wouldn't stop playing in Sojung's head. Every single time, they never failed to make Sojung's heart ache.

She could hear it. To her, SinB's voice was filled with sadness, pain and hatred. She could still remember everyone's faces when they were looking at her. To her, they were filled with disappointment and disgust.

If only she knew how wrong she was. That SinB's voice was not filled with hatred at all. It was undeniably filled with sadness and pain but only because they were all hurting for her. That the expressions on the members' faces were one of worry, love, fear and sadness. They feared they wouldn't be able to get their Sojung unnie back.

She thought she wouldn't feel anymore. She used to not know which she preferred; feeling everything or being numb. Yet, now she wished to go back to being numb. Because the moment they all came back along with the voices, everything came crashing down.

It was all too much and she didn't know what to do.

Staring at the Han river, Sojung took it all in. The criticisms. From haters and herself. The jokes that actually hit a sensitive spot in her- be it by the members, source music staff,family or friends. The key events that happened, both positive and negative. The hatred she had for herself. The burdens she had. The thoughts she had for everyone in the whole world even if she didn't know them.

She felt suffocated. Trapped in her own feelings and thoughts which brought her pain yet she couldn't see an end to.

Breaking her gaze from the river, she began to walk. She came to a conclusion. That no matter what she does or says, she'll always drag others down.

 She made her choice.

Sojung wished to stop giving everyone, including herself, chances. The chance to create more memories for her to remember. Both good and bad. The chance to give and receive love but also hatred. The chance to increase the burdens on her shoulders that she didn't need to carry yet did because of how much she cared from everyone.

And that's exactly what she was going to do.

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a/n : Hey so I was meant to update this yesterday but I ended up trying to draw. I tried to draw sowon even though i can't draw for my life and yeah it took me like three hours and I failed horribly. In the previous chapter I said this would be the last chapter but I'm dividing this up into either two or three parts as it will be long and also I made changes from what I have written! Thank you for reading.