'Why did I agree to this?' Jieun thought to herself. Her heart begins to accelerate, her palms begin to sweat. Despite looking physically ready for her performances, already wearing a royal blue dress that Jiyong picked out for her that contrasts really well with his fiery red outfit, mentally she feels the opposite. It has been a while since she felt this unready and nervous for her performances. She should be - they have only managed to rehearse for them together just yesterday. And to go through them in such a big stage, she feels rather frightful. If this is not love, then she does not know what this is for agreeing to such a mad idea just a few days earlier. He better be grateful for this.

As soon as she exits from her car, the paparazzi are already there to take snapshots of her. Snapshots of one of the top female artists in Korea just arriving to one of the top male artists' concert as guest. It's bound to make it as a headline for tomorrow or few hours' entertainment news. She gives them a wave, masking her fears with a smile before heading backstage.

Even from where she is as she makes her way backstage, she could already hear the dragon's voice. And he sounds amazing. He truly is a superstar. She could not believe she would end up with someone like him. She also could not believe that someone like him would like someone like her. To this day, she does not know what it is that makes him be interested in her. She questions that every day. How did they end up becoming like this? How did it really happen? Was it because of Palette or did it already start earlier?

Only God knows. Because even she does not know the answers to her questions.

*

There is now a short break in the concert yet the atmosphere in the arena is still as lively as it was during any of the performances. The crowd is still in their soaring mood, the momentum is still high. Despite that break, she has yet to meet the superstar himself. It is just not possible until their performances together - he is only given a short amount of time to change his outfits after all.

"So you're Jiyong's girl!" That statement came out of nowhere that Jieun almost jumps upon hearing it. She turns to her side to see who the maker of the statement was. And it was none other than the bad- female rapper herself, CL.

"Hello, CL shi." She awkwardly bows to the rapper. So when CL pulls her in for a hug, she is quite surprised from such gesture - not that she was complaining because CL truly is someone she looks up to for her bold sassy confidence.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, IU shi." The rapper genuinely smiles at her as she releases the meeker one from the embrace. "When Jiyong told me that he is seeing you, I found it quite hard to believe. You're normally not his type, no offense," she adds amusingly.

"None taken," Jieun genuinely answers. She awkwardly laughs, not knowing what to expect. She has never really talked to his friends about him. Unless you count Seungri but that was only a brief conversation about their collaboration.

"But now that I see you, I can see why though. You're charming and genuine."

"Oh thank you, CL shi." She bows again to the rapper to which she laughs, almost stopping Jieun from doing so.

“Please, call me Chaerin. No need to be so formal with me. You’re only a few years younger than me after all.”

“All right. Likewise, please call me Jieun.” She extends her hand to Chaerin, a symbol of a start to a possible friendship.

“All right.” Chaerin reciprocates the handshake, a smile in place. “Anyways, just want to say good luck on performing later and all the best to you guys. You should know that he definitely really likes you. A lot,” she adds with honesty.

“Thank you, Chaerin… really. Even I really like him too… a lot.” Jieun’s eyes expressing the truthfulness of her words. “Also, I just want to say congrats to you. You sound amazing just now.”

Before Jieun knows it, it is almost her time to start performing. Chaerin gives her a thumb up before whispering a good luck to her. She returns the rapper a smile before slowly making her way on stage. She could feel her heart beating even more than a moment ago. As much as she feels unready to do it, she has to go forward with it. The show must go on.

Here goes nothing.

*

She is so adorable. He knew what he got himself into when he sneakily came behind her during the beginning of his rap – he knew that she would be startled by it. But he did not expect her to almost trip from it. It made him want to laugh so hard. But he couldn’t. Not when they’re performing so he has to control his expressions and emotions. Which almost backfired because he ended up forgetting some of his lyrics. It really is a good thing that Jieun knows the lyrics to it well so she could cover up his mistakes well.

She really is so professional. He would like to applaud that about her. She manages to maintain that professionalism on stage, keeping a rather vague neutral expression and composure on herself. Unlike him. There are far too many times when he just wants to touch her and physically have her so close to him, just like how he would normally get during other times. But he couldn’t. Not on stage. So he has to remind himself over and over again not to do it. But there are so many times when he almost failed – his hand left hanging for a second before returning back to a safe zone. It really is a torture for him to go through with it – to be so used to having unlimited access whenever he sees her but now, he couldn’t even touch her – it’s just…

At this point, he just can’t wait to have her in his arms, even for just for a short while. He is dying to feel her lips on his, even for just a short while. But he doesn’t know when that would be possible. He doesn’t think he would be able to do that anytime soon – she is planning to leave his concert as soon as she is done performing after all, and he would have to go forward with performing even when she exits the stage.

He will just have to wait. No matter how much he really wants it.

*

There is a reason why artists tend to feel lonely once they have just finished performing on stage. One moment, all eyes are on you – you are the center of attention, cameras are flashing snapping every bits of precious memories of you on stage, fans are there for you screaming and calling out your name in the midst of the loud, high adrenaline atmosphere. The next, all the glitz and glamour are gone – the music stops playing, the fans all return home returning back to their day-to-day lives, they’re not there physically to ask you ‘how are you doing’, ‘how’s your day’ and kiss you goodnight. It is a brutal realization but that’s the ugly truth about the entertainment industry. To experience that loneliness, it’s hard to shake it off.

He couldn’t help feeling that even right now. He still feels this way even in the midst of this chaotic over-populated atmosphere. It’s funny, he shouldn’t feel lonely because he really is not alone… not physically. He is out celebrating with his staffs and crew for the success of the start of his tour, so why couldn’t he shake this feeling away?

He tries to be in a party mood, mustering as much smiles and laughter as he could. He tries drinking shots after shots to numb that feeling away. But he couldn’t. It really is a stubborn feeling like a disease sticking to a body system.

He needs her. He needs her right now. Because she is the only person who can make it all go away.

*

What a night. It has been rather eventful for Jieun on that night. She has managed to attend to two gigs in one night. She even managed to perform in front of large amount of people without any fails… even with the inadequate amount of practice. She mentally gives herself a pat on the back.

The only thing that is missing, that is stopping her from being truly happy is him. She misses him. A lot. She shouldn’t be – she had just seen him just a few hours ago so shouldn’t that be enough? And to think that he will be going in and out of Seoul quite a number of times for the next few months, and then after several of those months, he would be enlisted in the army – can she shake this feeling away? Will this ever get easier? Her heart really longs for him.

She stares at her phone, wanting to just call him. If she just follows her heart, she knows that she would just call him without any second thought to tell him just how much she misses him. But she knows she shouldn’t – he’s going on a night out to celebrate anyway… he should have his share of fun because this is only the start of his intense schedule. So she chooses to just put her phone down and finds something to distract herself with.

Lately, she does found something to distract herself with: slime. It is surprisingly relaxing to just play with it. The soothing sound it makes when she folds it in making its shape, its colorful appearance that is just pleasing to her eyes… it is just a calming sensation on her. A stress reliever, even.

She was just about to start to really play the slime that she has just recently purchased a few days ago when suddenly she could hear someone attempting to unlock the passcode to her front door, but fail. She could hear that person attempting to do so numerous times before pressing the doorbell. Who could it be? At this late in the night? It was almost the dawn of an early morning so she could feel her heart skipping a beat. She heads to the front door to check who it is that is making such sounds. She checks its CCTV and she couldn’t help but feel surprised. It’s him, the guy she longs for. Kwon Jiyong.

As soon as she opens the door, she could feel his arms wrapping around her shoulders, caging her into an embrace. “Oppa,” she says questionably yet with a hint of affection.

“Jieun ah,” he cheekily grins, smells of alcohol exude from his mouth. “Can I stay over? I just don’t want to be alone tonight.” She could feel his weight slowly being put on top of her shoulders as he is slowly losing himself.

“Of course, oppa,” she worriedly answers. Why in the right mind is he super drunk right now? She tries her best to gather as much strength as she can to drag him carefully to the living room. She puts him on her sofa and is about to get some pillows and a quilt when she could feel him grabbing her wrist, preventing her from doing so. “Oppa, I have to get you a pillow and a quilt,” she explains.

“You…” he utters. “Do you know that you are really beautiful, you?” he adds, not quite sure if he is still awake or if he is sleep-talking.

“So I’ve been told,” she smiles to herself upon hearing such statement.

“And do you know how much I love you, you?” Wait, did he just say…? “I love you, Jieun ah,” he reiterates. “I really really do.” Those three words finally escape from his lips without him realizing it.

She could feel her heart beating faster, her cheeks flaming red. Her heart jumps for joy upon hearing those words. “I love you too,” she answers, a set of words that he probably does not realize hearing at that moment. She softly his face and kisses him goodnight before gathering the things she was about to get just a moment ago.

What a night.