Taehyung woke up with probably the worst hangover in the world.

That's not an exaggeration, since his head was pounding and his insides kept churning a bitter acid into his mouth.

There was no other random pains, though, which Taehyung counted himself lucky for. Waking up with random bruises was not only annoying but slightly worrying.

Taehyung lay pitifully in his bed for a few more minutes before the pain in his head began to get even worse.

Gingerly making his way to the bathroom, he half noticed he was still wearing his clothes from the night before, and that his phone had probably digging into his leg all night.

He took his phone out as he swallowed a couple painkillers and blinked blearily at the phone's brightness.

He then noticed he had several texts from Jimin, one from Seokjin and also one missed call from Seokjin.

He clicked on the ones from Jimin which were kinda hard to read (he had tried to correct his mistakes in his drunkenness which only resulted in more mistakes, obviously) but were saying something along the lines of 'where are you?'.

Seokjin's were also asking Taehyung if he was safe and to ring him immediately with his whereabouts (Seokjin was always the more responsibly if them, especially when drinking was involved.

One time, they had almost all got arrested when a drunk Taehyung claimed he wanted to crawl into someone else's greenhouse and sleep amongst the cucumbers... Seokjin had tried to stop Jimin from breaking the glass, but soon enough both he and Taehyung were curled up around each other surrounded by slightly squashed cucumber and tomato plants. 

Thankfully, Seokjin was able to persuade the owners that they'll pay for the damage. The owners only agreed because Seokjin had convinced them Taehyung and Jimin were from a local mental institution and this was their first day (or night) out.)

But really, Taehyung was confused. 

In all the hazy memories he has of that night he was definitely with at least one person.

And who could that even be if not Jimin or Seokjin?

The memories (and no doubt regrets) from that evening would come back in due course, so Taehyung decided to busy himself in becoming slightly more human.

He groggily made a cup of coffee (he may have used a tablespoon to measure the sugar, which was definitely a bad idea) and curled up onto his sofa in a ball.

He had just begun to fall back asleep when a memory flashed up in his minds eye, still a bit blurry but more comprehensible now.

It was of him accusing Jungkook (Jungkook?) of being a stalker.

Several things were unusual about this memory, for one Taehyung didn't remember why Jungkook was there. 

And secondly, why the hell was Jungkook there?!

He quickly sat up (too quickly, as the blood rushed around his body at a rapid pace, causing his head to bang even harder) and then slowly began to call Seokjin back.

Taehyung hadn't checked the time, but was sure no matter what time it was his friend would be willing to help him in his crisis.

'Taehyung?' Seokjin's voice sounded both confused and relieved. And also a bit groggy, which made Taehyung rethink the time issue.

'Seokjin, hi, I have a massive problem...' He said in a quiet voice, practically whispering.

'If it's another spider in your room I-'

'No no it's bigger than that... Human sized...'

Seokjin sighed on the other end.

'Alright, what's your problem? Is it Jimin out to kick your for not replying to his texts?'

'No it's, I remembered something of last night but Mr Grumpy was there so now I'm confused?'

There was a beat before Seokjin sighed again.

'Why are you confused? He was standing around looking at you and you went up to confront him? He then stuck around with us before you both kinda ditched us?'

Taehyung stared at his phone for a second before sighing deeply.

'Right... Ok... Do I believe you? Possibly not...'

'Believe me or not, you could just ask Jungkook next time you see him.' Seokjin said with amusement in his voice. 'I take it you don't remember where you went off to?'

Taehyung shook his head, before remembering he was on the phone. 

'Uh, no... It'll probably come back to me eventually though...'

'Right, when it does, send me a text... But only if it's a more reasonable hour... Talk later, yeah?'

With that his friend hung up.

And it was only then that he noticed the time, yeah perhaps 4am wasn't the best time to call someone up...

He did think his friend was slightly less worried sounding than usual, which explained the only one text and one call (Taehyung knew too well that Seokjin could worry like an over protective mother, with other 60 missed calls and 100+ texts...).

Did that mean he had gone somewhere with Jungkook? 

He didn't have any suspicious stains or strange aches, so Taehyung at least could accept they hadn't done anything... (not that he was thinking they possibly would do anything, or imagining anything they would possibly do together. But, hypothetically, if they possibly would ever do something of that nature together, which they wouldn't, then at least Taehyung can feel relieved at the thought he wouldn't have done something whilst intoxicated where he couldn't really remember what happened. This was all hypothetical of course, since that was definitely something that would never happen, ever.)

It didn't mean he didn't do anything embarrassing in front of someone who was essentially his boss.

(Taehyung was half considering sending in his resignation before he had to next go in, just so he could avoid Jungkook. It was either that or faking his own death and moving to Mexico.)

He laid back down onto his bed (not that he remembered returning to his bedroom) and closed his eyes with the pretence of wracking his brain for the rest of his memories from that night.

Unfortunately, instead he fell asleep, still fully dressed.

He woke up again 10 hours later; headache slightly less pounding, the need to vomit had lessened and his memories of the previous night had returned with great force.

Not to be over dramatic, but Taehyung severely wished that the other pains would return in order to forget his newly returned memories (and regrets).

The faking-his-death plan seemed like his best option at the moment.

Maybe he could change his name to Enrique? He could learn to play the saxophone and join a touring jazz band. He could meet his true love whilst on stage in Germany, whilst playing a dramatic rendition of Careless Whisper (which would later become their wedding song, obviously). They'd have several beautiful children, live in a small German cottage near to some mountains where Taehyung (sorry, Enrique) would row a boat in the massive lake next to their house. He'd teach his son to play the saxophone, and live a blissfully beautiful life. Only when he's on his death bed would he admit his older identity, and reveal how one drunken embarrassing encounter with an attractive business colleague left him with no choice but to fake his own death. His family would probably contact Jungkook in an attempt to make Taehyung (Enrique) feel better in his last few days. Jungkook, who was still attractive, would smile at him before Taehyung died peacefully with dreams of an alternative life where he and Jungkook could've been happy...

Although, all of that seems way too over dramatic. Maybe he could just ignore Jungkook for the rest of his life.

Anything to avoid the embarrassment of looking Jungkook in the eye after he has remembered what had happened.

Although, maybe Jungkook doesn't even remember it? 

He was drunk too, so perhaps everything will be okay and only Taehyung will have to live with the embarrassment...

On second thoughts, that change of identity seemed a better options...