KNOCK 4

“Don’t miss me when I’m gone.” Jackson teased playfully has he put the last belonging of his into the small luggage while the author just rolled his eyes while carrying their dinner to the dining table.

“Come on, can’t you just miss me? I need some missing you know.” Jackson continued cheekily before making his way to the table after putting his readied luggage aside.

“Fine, I will really miss you.” Mark sighed dramatically which of course amused the playful president whose all smile at this point.

“I feel so loved right now.” Jackson sobbed, ‘touched’ before they burst out into a fit of laughters at their own silly drama scene.

“But seriously though, take good care of yourself while I’m gone.” Jackson said when the laughter died, the hint of seriousness were clear in his tone.

“You too, don’t work to hard.” Mark said with a soft smile before quickly turning his focus on their delicious dinner when he realized Jackson was just staring at him with a smile.

Before things gets any awkwarder for the author, Jackson’s phone rang which breaks the silence between them but the look on the young president’s face when he saw the number flashing on the screen were enough to tell Mark is from Jaebum whose apparently is Jackson’s ex.

He never really questioned anything after that incident which took place about a month ago because Jackson didn’t look ready to talk about the said man and what he knew so far was just his name because it’s the same name Jackson cused on those sad rainy days.

“You know, you should pick up. He has been calling almost everyday at this point. Clean it out with him.” Mark suggested cautiously, knowing it might not be the best idea for his neighbour but at least it will stops those annoying calls.

“There is nothing to be said, Yi En. He needs to move on from me already because it’s useless for him to tell me to stay when he put everything else but us at the front. At this point, it’s already too tiring for me and him.” Jackson sighed, taking a final glance at the ringing phone before turning his focus to the bowl of hot noodles cooked by his neighbour.

The author could only nodded and sighed mentally in defeat because he understand that feeling too well, it was already too late for the other party to fix something that’s long overdue between them.

Mark, himself has been receiving calls and texts from Jinyoung occasionally but he never really see the need to respond to them because it was clear as day by now that they are done. It was no use of them keeping these feelings and relationship going when one of them was already going to be settling down with someone else.

They were somehow in the same boat even if no stories were really exchanged between them but it didn’t change the fact they somehow understand and feel for each other.

“Are you sure, you don’t want to join me? We can stayed for a couple of days more and we can hang out.” Jackson asked, changing to a lighter topic after seeing how their mood were affected by an idiot like Im Jaebum.

“I really can’t, tomorrow’s the final meeting for the book release and I need to be there.” Mark muttered out sadly, he really wants to go but he’s currently busy for his latest book release.

“Alright, we'll just celebrate with the boys when I get back.” Jackson nodded, understanding that the release has been in the author’s mind recently and didn’t want to force him.

Their dinner continue on with chit chats here and there before Mark excused himself home so that Jackson could have an early night and prepare himself for the morning flight tomorrow.

___________________________

“Great, thank you.” Mark thanked his editor after that two hours long meeting where his release date was finally decided.

“I can’t wait to see it became the next best seller again. Your work never disappoint.” The editor remarked, smiling with pride at the author who brings in so much for their small company.

Mark just smile, a little embarrassed upon hearing that compliment but nevertheless he feel grateful to the chirpy editor who always cheers him on.

With one last goodbye, he finally exited the office in high spirits since all discussion are finally cleared off his back but to only have his mood spoilt when he was greeted by Jinyoung whose parked by the office building, clearly waiting for him.

“Mark.” Jinyoung called out excitedly, making a beeline straight to the author before holding those hands in his, making Mark immediately flustered at the watching eyes, walking by them.

“What are you doing here?” Mark asked, trying to calm himself down while trying to free himself from the other’s tight hold.

“You been ignoring me, why aren’t you picking up my calls nor answering my texts?” Jinyoung asked, not even caring about those eyes that usually makes him paranoid because he was too upset at the lack of replies that he even had to wait at Mark’s usual location just to see him.

“You really expect me to be fine after finding out about your engagement?” Mark pointed out the obvious to the stupid in front of him who clearly know the reason why he avoided those calls and texts.

“You know that I have an explanation but you didn’t give me any chances, you should listen to what I have to say.” Jinyoung exclaimed but Mark only sighed, roughly pulling his hands out of the hold before walking away.

“Why can’t you just listen to me first? “ Jinyoung shouted, chasing after him who didn’t like they are catching more attention than before, passers by clearly are up for some drama.

“Can you stop it? People are looking.” Mark hissed, turning to look at the puffing and frustrated Jinyoung who hates being treated this way.

“Can’t you just listen to me, I can explain everything from the start.  Don’t leave me like this.” Jinyoung begged like he don’t give a damn anymore because he clearly hated being treated like this but he wants Mark in his life so it doesn’t matter if he look like a desperate idiot now.

Mark hates it, really hates it when he saw the wet eyes forming and the fact that Jinyoung just guilt trip him into another giving in on his part.

With no other prefered choice, Mark found himself seated in Jinyoung’s car with pure awkwardness in the air as no words are being exchange them.

“Well, are you going to say something or I’m going?” Mark sighed, can’t stand the silence anymore as he been watching the other trying to find a good way to start his explanation.

“I know, I didn’t tell you about Yerim but that’s because I didn’t want to break you. I know you treasure us and I didn’t have the heart to just straight out tell you about my engagement with her. I’m sorry, I didn’t tell you but I thought it was better that way.” Jinyoung started carefully, watching Mark’s facial expression which still remains rather nonchalant to his words.

“ I know that I have her now but nothing changes because the one that I love is you not her so you shouldn’t be affected by our relationship. You are still my priority.” Jinyoung finished off, trying to convince the amused author who mentally scoffing at the the stupidity of everything.

“Do you know the relationship we shares, Jinyoung?” Mark asked with a straight face, looking at the confused look on the other upon his question.

“We are lovers.” Jinyoung answered confidently, pushing away that confusion with confidence but to only to receive a dead dry laugh from the author who clearly was beyond speechless at this point.

“Correction, we are secret lovers. From the start, I was never meant to be seen so now even when you already belong to her, it didn’t matter because you weren’t mine to start with. You could have told me the truth about her and save us from all this headache.” Mark said, turning to look away from Jinyoung’s eyes and focusing on the view from the window screen instead.

“Mark, you are important to me. I will never let you go.” Jinyoung assured with a firm voice, trying to hold those hands again but the author was quick to pull away because he wasn’t in the mood to be lovey dovey in the car.

“No, let’s just end us, We were never meant to be.” Mark said, proving his point for the last time before trying to exit the car but the other’s set of words paused his movement.

“You are just going to dump me like this right before our seventh anniversary? I can’t believe that you can do that to me,  to us. “ Jinyoung muttered sadly, tears clearly dripping on his cheeks which clearly and obviously makes the author feels guilty.

Mark hates it when the guilt tripping starts even though most of the time it wasn’t his fault, it was just a way for the other to get his ways without demanding it of him.

“If you really treasure us, please go on this trip with me. We will clear everything between us with no distraction.” Jinyoung begged, holding on to his hands in a tight like as if silently pushing him into a corner where he can’t reject.

The author tried to fight but he know it was useless when he noticed his small luggage at the backseat, it was clear that the other even as his passport now given that Jinyoung entered the apartment to get his belongings packed.

With no choice left, he nodded his head and off they go to the nearest airport to head to Jeju for their dreadful anniversary trip, he really needs to make Jinyoung understand and end things by the end of this trip.

It’s about time he move on from their relationship completely, he don’t want to continue living like this anymore.

___________________________

“Don’t the view look stunning?” Jinyoung exclaimed excitedly, trying to bring up the mood when they step into their suite.

Mark just kept quiet like he did for the whole journey where else Jinyoung was trying hard to fit in those awkward conversation.

Jinyoung stares at the lack of response before inwardly sighs, knowing that it’s gonna be tough for him to win the author’s heart because Mark is never this angry towards him before.

For the past six years of being together,  Mark has always been a person that just go with his flow. He never go against his words and even if they argued, the author was never this angry to the point of ignoring him.

“Shower.” Mark’s deep voice pulled Jinyoung out of his thoughts, he watches as the other heavily headed towards the bathroom.

Thinking about Mark’s love for food, he quickly call room service to get a romantic dinner sent to their suit ready to surprise the other in the attempt to cool Mark down.

Jinyoung just hopes that he could fixes everything before this trip ends because he doesn't want to lose the author just because he was tied down to a woman.

Meanwhile in the shower, Mark was already regretting his decision when he could have just run away earlier because in the end, he wasn’t sure if he had enough strength to face Jinyoung with a straight mind without losing his own mind first.

He pushed away those thoughts and fully absorb himself under the water to recharged before exiting the room just to be greeted by an excited Jinyoung.

“What do you want to do? We still have some time before dinner.” Jinyoung asked in hope that he can spend some quality time with his boyfriend after a long time.

“I want to rest, you can do whatever you want.” Mark answered, ignoring that disappointed look he got from the other and when ahead to unpack his small luggage.

“Mark, we are here to celebrate. Let’s have some fun, maybe play at the pool.” Jinyoung suggested, going after the other with a big smile, totally ignoring the cold tone.

“Go ahead, I’m not in the mood for fun.” Mark flatly reject, quickly keeping his stuffs in the closet before plopping himself on the queen bed after the unpacking is done.

Jinyoung almost cursed out because of the attitude but he managed to control his frustration before making his way out the room, he needs some air to think or he won’t be able to deal with Mark later.

The moment he heard the door slams closed, Mark opens his eyes and stares at the ceilings blindly because he clearly wasn’t that tired but he just wasn’t in the mood to rekindle their love.

Of course, he remembers that’s tomorrow is their anniversary but with a fiance in the picture, it was wrong of him to even think about it because he never did hold any statues in Park Jinyoung’s life.

He understands that things don’t have to change but it’s different when the one who doesn't like changes is the one changing because he was still the same old Mark but Jinyoung is already someone new.

Their love was long gone, all that was left was convenience and comfort. It was something that he was aware of for ages but because he loves and cares too much for Jinyoung that he still hold on. It was hard to left those hard truth unspoken but it’s finally the time to let go even if Jinyoung wouldn’t listen nor understand.

The author sighed, letting out all those emotion pant up in him before his eyes slowly shut close, drifting him off to a deep slumber.

When dinner finally arrives, Mark was awaken by the sound of Jinyoung’s humming before greeted by the sight of the freshen up other whose has his hand out, ready to take him to the dining table that had their anniversary feast set up.

“Happy 7th anniversary!” Jinyoung exclaimed, pulling out a chair for the rather surprise Mark who clearly wasn’t expecting such a romantic dinner set up.

In all the years they are together, Jinyoung had always deemed romantic things as stupid and meaningless so therefore it’s usually him who planned the surprises and romantic dinners.

“I know, I haven’t been romantic enough towards you before right now, I just want you to know that I can’t afford to lose you. You are my joy and happiness, I’ll be lonely without you.” Jinyoung poured out his sincere feelings unexpectedly which cause Mark unable to react as he took his seat, feeling rather overwhelmed especially after just waking up.

He just look at that pair of eyes staring at him with hope, trying to find a trace of sincerity, making Jinyoung even more desperate and antsy at the lack of response or reaction to his words.

“You are angry, I know. I shouldn’t had hide anything from you, I know. You can beat me up or do just anything as long as you forgive me.” Jinyoung added, almost begging at this point because he can’t take that silence, it’s slowly killing him.

The author just stayed quiet, he didn’t really know if those heartfelt words still has an effect on him or not but he clearly wasn’t in the right trail of thoughts to say anything.

“Mark, say something. Don’t punish me like this.” Jinyoung urged, looking at how the author look rather emotionless at this point, scaring him.

“Jin, things has been really hard between us. I don’t think we should be in the mood to celebrate either, I know it meant alot to you because it’s to me too but right now, we are at different places in our relationship. You are about to be married off to a heiress while I’m just here, hanging on my own. I shouldn’t be your anything by now, you are already committed to her, don’t hurt her.  It’s best if we end it all now before one of us get even more hurt than these.” Mark finally said, pouring out his inner thoughts on the whole thing, he was ready to just end things before it’s gets hard for every single party involved.

When he was dragged here, he knows that things needs to end here with Park Jinyoung, it got nothing to do with their anniversary.

“Mark, I love you. Don’t do this to me, you know I love you.” Jinyoung pleaded when he realized that the author wasn’t playing at this point of the conversation.

“Park Jinyoung, you know that I stayed by your side all these while without questioning anything but we can’t do         this anymore. You can’t keep me now because you already have her, you can’t have both because that’s just too selfish on your part. I also don’t want to be that person to ruin your life and potential marriage. I’m angry at the fact that you hide everything from me that I was the last one to know that my boyfriend got engaged on my birthday but I quickly realized it was useless to even be angry because things already happened and I wasn’t part of it to start with.” Mark ended those words with a dry laugh before slowly slipping off his ring and put it on the table

“Mark, don’t…” Jinyoung muttered, tears dripping when he saw that same ring that he gifted Mark on their first anniversary being slipped off that finger.

When the author slowly got up and about to leave the dining area in the suite, Jinyoung shoot up to back hug the leaving figure, he can’t leave just like that.

“Don’t do this, I need you. I miss you. I love you.” Jinyoung begged like crazy, clearly losing his mind while hugging Mark tight while the author stays strong even if it’s hard for him because it was the right and best thing to do.

Their relationship was already beyond help nor repair so it’s better to let go now than get more hurt later.

The desperate Jinyoung turns the author to face him, he stares at face that he loves the most before diving in for a kiss like usual, hoping that it will spark something again between them but Mark turned away, pushing the other slightly.

“Jin, stop.” Mark said when he felt those tight hold on his arms but instead it just triggered the other who's clearly in denial to become rougher before trying to force himself on him.

The struggle got worse when Mark tried to free himself but that just blinded Jinyoung more in anger and frustration which cause him to  ripping the author’s shirt but luckily Mark was quick to realize that he decided to just step on Jinyoung’s toes making him immediately shout out in pain while letting him go out of reflects.

Mark was ready to attack again, he wasn’t thinking for anything else except his safety and he knows that he didn’t want to be in the same room after all these.

“Mark, I’m sorry. I just lose control, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” Jinyoung apologized upon realizing the rip on Mark’s t-shirt created by him.

Before the author could react to the situation, Jinyoung’s phone rang which cause him to quickly answers and just by the way he answered the call, Mark knows it was his fiance at the other end but what he didn’t know that he would be thrown out of the suite after that call ended.

In a hurry, Jinyoung quickly collected all of his belongings voluntarily before sending him and his small luggage out of the room with a ‘sorry’ expression.

“I’m sorry, Mark but we will talk again later. Right now, Yerim is heading this way and she can’t found out about us so you have to go.” Jinyoung apologized in a hurry before slamming the damn suite door on his face.

Mark just laugh like a crazy at the absurdity of everything, he was so stupid to think that they can even talk this out without him suffering like always.

With nowhere to go and feeling lost, Mark found himself seated at the staircase like a dummy. He feel so stupid and dumb that he just wanna disappear into thin air so he don’t have to deal with his own stupidity that certainly puts him in this situation.

He spent a good hour thinking about how stupid he was until he finally decided that he needs to find a place to sleep after realizing that he can’t be spending his night on the resort staircase and that’s where he found himself at the reception asking for a room.

“I’m sorry, sir. No rooms available.” The cold receptionist answered after giving him a quick look, it was clear she wasn’t interested to check for the sloppy looking author.

He knows that he looks like a mess with a black hoodie covering him to hide the tear but he needed a room so he asked again even if the lady end up giving him a stare.

“No rooms, we are fully booked for this weekend. You should look for somewhere else.” The lady hissed, looking at him like as if he was a beggar, dismissing him without realizing a pair of eyes were watching her.

“Can you at least help to check if a flight back to Seoul available for tonight?” Mark enquired, ignoring the attitude because he needs a solution fast and he didn’t had time to care about bad service.

“No, please move over. I have other guests to attend to.” She said, rolling her eyes before changing her attention to the unexpected Mr Wang.

“It’s that how you treat your guest here?” Jackson asked scarily as he smirked at the dumbfounded lady while the author turn to look at the source of the voice in surprise.

“Mark…” Jackson uttered out in surprise himself because he clearly wasn’t expecting to see the other here and definitely not in this state, something clearly happened.

“Jacks, did something happened?” A man voice broke the silence before he appears beside the said man, looking lost and concern.

“Eric, I think a staff here needs to work on her service, she can’t disregard guests based on appearance, right?” Jackson said with a rather unamused tone, making the resort owner upset while Mark stays quiet.

“I’m sorry on her behalf, what help do you need sir?” Eric asked in almost a panic after throwing a disapproving look over at the now flustered receptionist.

“I asked for a room but she said it was all fully booked so I requested for her to just recheck again but I might have annoyed her by doing that. “ Mark explained, feeling sorry for the lost look on the poor owner’s face while Jackson continue staring holes into the receptionist’s soul.

“Even if she’s annoyed, she shouldn't be treating a guest like that because it’s just scream bad service. In this line of work, it’s an unwritten rule to treat everyone equally.” Jackson stated, clearly sending those words to the rude receptionist while Eric nodded in agreement because he knows that the younger won’t be this angry if she didn’t do anything wrong.

The owner quickly called for his resort manager to deal with Mark but Jackson wasn’t in the mood to put Mark through more questioning, especially not after seeing the state his neighbour is in.

“Don’t worry about him, hyung. He can share with me, just send some extra blankets and pillows to my suite. I also didn’t mean to call you out but she can't belittle  guests like that or it won’t reflect well on this lovely resort.” Jackson said, patting on the older’s shoulder who understands he meant well.

With those words being said, he bid Eric ‘good night’ before walking away while dragging the quiet author along, he’s not gonna let anyone make tonight any more worst for his new found best friend.

Hello all you wonderful people, I'm offically back to at least complete this story because you all know me, I just can't leave you guys hanging just like that. It's been a rough time for me in this fandom as well as a markson lover, with all the drama and hate it really didn't help with my already semi blocked muse. At the same time life is just as hard so ya, forgive me for the absent for the last few months. I was trying to find something that can help with my financial side so I had to stop thinking about writing for a while. Well, let;s not talk about depressing stuff, back to this story. I hope it was not too bad of a chapter and don't forget to comment and show me some love. I miss being here and I'll wait for your comments.

Take care, InfinitelyCassie :)