When I Know That You Will Never Be With Me Again

The Time When I Stop Loving You

This is when everything went blank in front Jungkook. He had prepared himself when he ever meets Jimin. When he meets the person who he was longing to see for a long time. Who he was indebted to. Who he ruined from years ago. But expectation always turns out so differently compared to what happened earlier. He was so naive to think that they will have a dramatic reunion. That they will meet somewhere where he can say everything he wanted to tell Jimin. But he was tongue-tied when he saw Jimin. When he saw the coldest stare that he never thought he will receive from someone who used to be the warmest person he knew. He froze from where he was standing when Jimin walked passed at him. His eyes downcast. Looking everywhere. His lips which felt dry. His heart that was beating so fast like he ran a marathon. His hands trembling. It was like he was back when he was looking at Jimin at their graduation party. Back when he tried convincing himself that what he did was right. What he knows that was wrong. And now it was like he was convincing himself again that it's was right for Jimin to see him again so that he'll tell everything. But he knows deep within him, it was wrong. It was wrong because he opened a closed door that Jimin never wanted to open.

He heard some gossips behind him. Students who saw the great Park Jimin walking down their corridors. He was just forced to get back from reality when Jinho, one of his teammates called him.

"Cap? Are you alright?" He looked at his teammate. He didn't even understand his question. "Huh? What did you say?"

"I said, 'Are you alright?'. You were just standing here?"

"Me? I... I just.." Jinho looked at him curiously. He tilted his head sideways. Brought his thumb and forefinger on his chin, analyzing what happened to their respectable captain. And then he realized what maybe the reason. He went near to Jungkook and said something just above the whisper.

"You... You saw Park Jimin, huh?" He emphasized the name and it made Jungkook's eyes widen.

"Oh! I was right! You saw him!" He moved away just to see his captain's reaction clearly.

"What are you talking about?"

"Park Jimin. Everyone was already talking about him. I saw him walking from here. So, I thought you might have seen him." He reasoned out. "So, did you?"

Jungkook looked at him. He was thinking he will say the truth. But realized that nothing will make sense if he deny it. He sighed and nodded. And Jinho laughed.

"I knew it! I was sure that you were interested about it when we talked about him before."

After school, the news was immediately passed around and even some of them was lucky to see Jimin in person. They know that even though we will be studying in the same university, it will be hard for some of them to see him. Specially that he will be just attending classes for Dance majors. So, you were considered lucky to even witness Jimin in person. He was so perfect. His body was crafted for dance. He has lean body and his muscles were not too overwhelming. You can see that he's body was a result from his hard and unending dance rehearsals and recitals. His hair was blonde and it made him look soft yet piercing. Pictures in magazines and interviews doesn't give justice for his face. That's why everyone were awestruck to see it in person. He was like a walking doll. His skin was so fair but it comes out healthy. His lips were more enchanting. And the clothes he was wearing was definitely was from some foreign boutiques and compliments his body. It was so hard to put his beauty into words. You will be definitely swooned by him.

Everyone was changing clothes after showering to get rid the sweat that they gained from the practice. Jungkook was still out of it during the practice, that of his teammates . Almost everyone inside the room was talking about the dancer. They were still stocked with the idea of Jimin studying in their university. Some of them was also disappointed and wished that they majored in dance even though that they have both left feet, just to be close with the latter. All these noises just pass through his ears but what caught his attention was what Soowon said.

"I heard that he was kind of snob."

"Yeah, but actually I understand why. Well, you will really act that way because you know that anyone might be an enemy." Jeremy replied.

"Wow! How did you know? Are you a celebrity too?" And everyone laughed.

"Yeah. He was from Busan, right? What do you think about his life back then? Do you think he was also popular?" Jinho suddenly asked when the laughter subsided.

"Well, maybe he was. I mean someone like that. I mean with that kind of face; he was surely popular." Soowon said.

"Yeah, maybe he is. Where did he studied in high school, Jem?" Jinho asked Jeremy while some of them as Jimin's stalker.

"Shut up! I am just a big fan a-holes." He answered back laughing. "As I remember, he studied from a private school and he was one of the smartest students there. I just forgot the name. Is it Busan International?" Jeremy provided as he tries to remember.

"Busan International Foreign School?" Jinho asked. Jeremy looked at him and nodded." Yeah. I think that one is."

"So if that is the school..." Jinho slowly looked at him and stared at him, thinking. And gasped.

"Cap! That's where you graduated, right?" Upon hearing that, almost everyone turned to him.

"What?" Jungkook tried feigning ignorance. But Jinho was pretty sure from what he remembers.

"Yeah. I asked you before. You even told that the teachers and the school facilities there was great when I told you that my sister will study there." Jinho informed him again. Making him remember that time when the latter was worried about his sister that will study far away from him.

"Wow! You didn't tell us that Cap. Well, to think of it. We just didn't ask about it. If you will compute the years, you and Jimin were definitely from the same batch." Soowon said while nodding.

"Wow! Daebak!"

"That's so cool Cap."

"I knew that you were special Cap."

Hearing and watching the scenes unfolding in front of him, he didn't what will be his next move. And even before he was able to make a decision, Jeremy looked at him and asked.

"So, how was Jimin Cap back in high school?" Everyone was now looking at him. Even the people who were not interested to listen a while ago was expectantly waiting for his answer.

He sighed. He felt defeated. He looked down, trying to gather himself. He grabbed his bundled from his locker as he spoke.

"Hmm. He was popular." He heard some of the agreed. "I knew it!", "Of course he is!", and "Definitely, or else everyone there was blind." Hearing the last comment made Jungkook smile bitterly. Yes, they were all blind because they didn't see Jimin in that kind of light. That even though he loves Jimin, he failed to see that there was more about the smart, kind and sweet Jimin. That he was worth the fight. That he deserved to be saved from everything.

"He was popular. He was so popular that even the 'cool' guys in our school was envious of him. He was very kind to everyone. He was definitely not a snob because he will get out of his league just to help people who needs him. He was very hard-working. He never wanted to disappoint someone that's why he always works so hard even though it might harm him. He was always smiling at people. He never judges someone. He always sees the goodness of everyone." He smiled. Remembering those times when he saw Jimin. Those things that made him fall in love with Jimin even when they were just first years. But of course, he was just a coward. He lost that person.

"So, yeah." He finished. He looked at his teammates that were looking at him. "Do you have questions?" Everyone shook their heads.

"Alright. Let's just meet again tomorrow at 5 PM." He left after waving his hand. Leaving a different vibe.

"Well, that was... kind of weird." Some of them just brushed some ideas from their head but Soowon, Jinho, and Jeremy looked at each other. They definitely sensed something different.

"What do you think?" Jeremy asked the two.

"Well, I think we need to dig some history." Soowon replied and the other two nodded. There was definitely something with their Captain and Jimin.


 

No one warned Jungkook on what's going to happen when he woke up late from thinking what may happen in this new path before we slept last night. It was like he was still caught in the moment of what happened. It was like his dreams turned as a reality. Those dreams that he had on regular basis. Specifically, the dream he had last night, where he sees Jimin in front of him, looking straight at him. With no emotions as he starts to walk away from him and the people who he thought his friends and people who he thought that cares behind him. Hands on his shoulders, stopping him to move to follow Jimin. And then someone have wrapped his arms around Jungkook's body and a hand that covered his mouth as he tried to shout Jimin's name. As this person moved his lips near to his ears, as he whispers.

"Don't even try. If you do that, you will leave all these things behind."

The man holding him forced him to look behind where he sees everything he left from Busan. His status, his 'friends', his family, and his fame. And he looked at the man who held him, and he froze. That man has the same face as his. Same smile and same aura he had back in Busan. And he felt that the way Jimin walked on was disappearing in front of him. The path was being erased by the same person who held him a while ago. And Jungkook realized that he was the first person who did the same in the reality as he woke up. Sweat dripping from his forehead. With fresh tears which he always he had whenever he dreams about Jimin.

And now as he tried his best making an excuse why he was late in class, he saw his professor in front of the lecture hall with someone beside her. That someone was also looking at him with wide eyes. Reflecting his own shock. But that person beat him on their staring contest when he successfully shifted his eyes at left. He didn't have any expression. Even annoyed or smirked wasn't evident on that person's face.

"Jeon Jungkook, you're late again of course." He shifted his eyes as his professor called his name. He felt embarrassed as he apologized.

"Well, I'll deal with you later. Go to your seat." His professor motioned her right hand as she dismissed him to his seat. "So, as I was saying a while ago. Park Jimin will be attending this class today. I know that you already know him but please don't try use my class to feed your inner needs. Do I make myself clear?" Her eyes scanned the room as if she was threatening everyone. And after making sure that no one will dare to do something that can sabotage their graduation, she looked at Jimin.

"So, Mr. Park you can take your seat." She already went to her desk her back in front of Jimin, she continued. "There's a vacant seat beside Mr. Jeon."

Jimin raised his brows. "Excuse me. Where?" The professor looked at him again.

"Oh. Jeon. The Jeon Jungkook who was late a while ago."

"Sorry. There?" Jimin inquired. Surprised. 'What the hell?' was written on his face.

"Why? Is there something wrong Mr. Park? Don't worry even he was late his kind of decent."

Jimin eyes moved around. His lips wanted to speak but he wasn't able to. He was formulating reasons which he thought was valid. The professor noticed this again. Again.

"So? Why are you not seating at your seat?"

"I... I..."

"You are?"

"I... I don't like at the back. Yeah, I don't really prefer to seat at the back. It's kind of hard for me to see from a far." He said like he was also convincing himself.

The professor was just silent for a moment looking straight at him. Like she was reading him. And she spoke.

"Mr. Park I just want to inform you that I don't tolerate favoritism or any act of the same kind." She said with a straight face. He thought that he made a mistake and will leave a bad impression on the teacher. But then she continued. "But well, I can't also let my student be deprived of learning just because he has difficulties. You can just seat wherever. There's a lot vacant seat after all. Now, move your nimble feet and seat. We don't have a whole day." She waved her hand again dismissing Jimin in front of her. But then she looked at Jungkook who's breath was caught at his throat. His doe eyes at its widest. Always swallowing his nervousness as he follows Jimin's movements.

"And Jeon." Jungkook looked at their professor. Still wearing the same expression, he has.

"Go to my office after." And Ms. Hwang went back to her desk to get her marker to start her lecture. "So class, I will discuss today the third part of Feminism in dance." Ms. Hwang continued her lecture with two students who were having their hardest time to focus with the class.


 

Namjoon was always on the edge because he never knows when he will see Jimin again. He was so stupid back when they met again because he didn't even get the younger's number. Then his rational mind also thought that they were not in that kind of relationship. But there's also a greedy part of him to do something to be closer with the younger. After all these years where he sought for his dreams after he was inspired on how Jimin achieved his dreams. Back in high school, he just saw a very simple Jimin who likes studying and helping others. But now, he turned to himself and worked hard to be someone who he is now. And lastly, he doesn't want the history to repeat itself. Where he left and gave up without trying just because he knows that Jimin likes Jungkook. And now that he knows that any minute Jungkook will reached out to Jimin, he will not let this to happen. He will do everything to make sure that the younger will be happy with him.

He was seated inside their university cafeteria when he saw Jimin entered. His jaw dropped as he saw Jimin in all his glory. He will be honest that Jimin didn't look that beautiful as what he appeared now. But what he liked about the old Jimin was his simplicity. He was already beautiful back then but makes him more lovable his pure heart. That even though he shortly forgot about the younger after he left high school (like he hypnotized himself to because he was a coward who lose a fight without doing anything), he saw Jimin again, at the rooftop as someone who was the most beautiful person he saw in his entire life.

It was like Jimin saw him and smiled sweetly. He felt that he was dreaming even when the younger was in front of him, waving his hand to wake him up.

"Sunbae-nim?" Jimin inquired. He was so cute. The elder just smiled at him, lost in thoughts. Seeing this, Jimin laughed at him.

"Sunbae, don't just smile. Are you alright?" And Namjoon was brought back to reality with an angel in front of him.

"Wha--What?" His eyes wide and Jimin was still smiling at him.

"You're so funny, sunbae-nim." And Jimin sat in front of him. The students inside the cafeteria was looking at them. Curious on how they knew each other. Or maybe jealous that Jimin was talking with a mere person like Namjoon.

"Stop calling me sunbae." He said after seconds. Jimin was taken aback while he was digging in his fries that Namjoon didn't even noticed that he was holding when the younger sat at the table.

"What?" Jimin was a little worried. Thinking if he might have been pushing too much. Thinking that he might be wrong to think that the elder wants to be friends with him.

Sensing the worry again. Namjoon wanted to slapped himself as he noticed the small frown on Jimin's face.

"That's not what I... meant. I mean, don't call me 'sunbae-nim'. It's too formal." This made Jimin sigh. Relieved that the elder didn't want to refuse him instead to make something between more friendly.

"Alright. What do you want me to call you? Hyung?"

This made Namjoon chocked as he sipped his cold coffee to hide his nervousness on what was happening right now. Who would have thought that this day will come? Where he will be in the same lunch table with Jimin. While back then he was just watching the other's performance on TV or on internet. It was two years ago when he first saw Jimin dancing clip on Youtube. Jimin started dancing for their dance studio and one day one of his recitals was uploaded by his friend from the same dance studio. Garnering so much views and likes he got an opportunity to audition to one of the most pretigious dance troupe in New York. Right after, everything was a wild ride. He rose to stardom quickly because based on what some critics said, that his dance was very unique. The way he dances was graceful but can trancend loneliness and frailty. It was very different from the usual dance that famous dancers showcase. This made Namjoon decide that maybe he can also do something like what Jimin did. He has always been a music enthusiast. He always finds joy in making beats, writing lyrics and melodies. So, he stopped for one year from studying and focused on music. He also met one of the indie artists that he admires during that time. And it enables him to dream more. Jimin inspired him to do something that he thought that he will never be brave to pursue. Jimin helped him to dream and to see that there is something more and greater in him that he failed to see after these years. So, in some ways Jimin was his lifeline. Jimin was someone who always wanted to see just so he can express his gratitude. But now that he is looking at that person, he can't still believe that it's true. That he was still watching Jimin from afar.

"Hyung! Are you alright?" Jimin stood up and went to him hurriedly. He was worried about the elder. He still has a faint memory that Namjoon was kind of clumsy.

"I--I'm fine. Sorry. I mean, yeah. You... you can call me 'hyung'" Jimin just looked at him. Unbelieving the words that came out from the elder. And Jimin just laghed again. It made Namjoon's heart swell in happiness. He never thought that he will be able to make Jimin laugh. And if his clumsiness can pursue this, well, he never thought that it was a blessing in disguise.

"You're unbelievable, hyung."

"Namjoon smiled. "I know right." And this made Jimin smiled again.

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BbuingBbuingMaknae #1
Okay this is makes me break inside hOW DARE U JEON JEONGUG OMFG im soft pls update ilysm; ***
Otaku3000_fangirl #2
Aaaah omg pleasseee authornimm this is soooo good. I can't wait for the next chapter!!!
YukariStarzYjae
#3
Chapter 8: Woww..these fic are amazing..i kind of understand why jimin act like that..i mean,he get really harsh treatment from people around him n of coz from kookie who he love dearly..society can be really hard sometimes..well,it was kind of human nature to do that..but not all people..i mean..urghhh
gosh,what am i saying..Ó( ° △ °|||)..sorry
okeyyyy..hwaiting authornim (。・ω・。)ノ♡
annethundr05 #4
Chapter 8: Wow this is awesome. My poor Jimin. I understand why Kookie said what he said, (society/his popularity) and yet I'm disappointed. He didn't have to say all that he said. Words are killer. Moving on I like how everyone is present and the storylines run simultaneously. Looking forward to how this all plays out.