i need time to replace what i gave away

ㅡ

And more than just once Hoseok found himself in some random club, dancing with some random strangers as he hoped he would find somebody to forget about reality with. He never did. There were many people who were obviously attracted to him, women as well as men. But, never even once he felt attracted to any of them. He tried, he honestly did, making out with some random dude at the back of the club, but nothing felt the way it had felt like with Namjoon. It didn’t take long as he would just leave them back there with a simple: ‘I can’t.’

Even though he and Namjoon weren’t in a relationship anymore he still felt like he was cheating on the younger whenever he tried to simply forget. There was always guilt bubbling up inside him. Well, he constantly felt this guilt, but at different levels throughout the day. He couldn’t really deal with it and he honestly just wanted to run back to Namjoon. But, he knew he couldn’t just do that. And now that weeks have passed he knew that his chance had finally passed. Namjoon had changed, had had no other possibility left in order to keep himself, and his heart, save. And it was all Hoseok’s fault. He knew that.

However, for some time his mind was able to fool him into a state where he honestly thought he could move on and refill