A bit more.

Just one more.

‘Image saved’

Immediately, I jumped off my office chair and did the victory dance. Babysitting a child — a big baby, to be exact — for five whole days could be very tiring because said 26-year-old child refused to leave me alone and kept on clinging on me until I entertained him. After sending Sehun — said child, if you did not get the drift — yesterday, I managed to do some editing to the fashion week’s photos I captured during D-Day within 24 hours and it was ready to be check by my editor-in-chief, Jessica Jung before I send them to the editorial for the finishing up and printing. I saved everything on my USB drive, my working PC, my email and my laptop — yup, save a lot, just in case, because you never know when exactly digital threats will try to attack your gadgets — before snoozing my laptop and walked — or skipped, I was not so sure — to Jessica’s office.

“Hey, Elena.” I greeted her secretary. “Is Jess in?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Sky.” Elena frowned. “Jess is in the meeting room. Video conferencing with the editor-in-chief in Seoul.”

“What for?”

"Don't know. It's quite P&C I guess since the Seoul branch called her personally. I only knew about this video conference this morning."

I pouted. I was excited to show her the outcomes but too bad it has to wait. I told Elena to holler me if Jessica enters her office before walked back to my own desk. Getting bored since my work is 100% done, I clicked on the fashion week folder to do some extra editing to fill my time with some activities before I bore to death.

"I thought you went to Jessica's."

The wireless mouse I was gripping tightly as I was checking up any photos that I need to patch up almost flew out of my hand when I heard the voice. I looked up and saw Brian smiling apologetically since he knew he startled me. My eyes turned back the screen while answering his question — or statement, whatever. I told him Elena's answer and he silently said 'oh'. I thought he will go away to his own working table but my gay best friend #3 leaned on the wall and silently observing me doing my job.

"Aren't you supposed to be working, Mr Rosier?"

"I'm bored. There's nothing else I can work on." He whined. "And don't tell me to clean up my table. I organized it from top to bottom. I even cleared my email!"

"Then, go sew some damaged clothes or iron."

"Ew, no. The intern could do that."

"You’re the worst mentor in the history of Conde Nast."

He rolled his eyes listening to me judging him. I continued to do my work with Brian still standing near to me. After a few minutes, Brian suddenly told me to hold up.

"What?" I asked him without tearing my eyes off the perfection of my photo's subject.

"That dude is creepy."

I looked back at Chanyeol’s photo of him cat-walking on my screen. He was wearing one of Jonghyun’s piece; a long coat with different designs of patch badges, a grey shirt, and black pants. Elijah, one of the hair stylists, set his brown hair in comma style, which made him super cute and adorable. I looked very hard to see any creepiness in Chanyeol.

“Nope.” I turned back to Brian. “I don’t see anything creepy.”

“No.” Brian kneeled down beside me and pointed his index finger on the screen. “Look at his eyes.”

My focus turned to Chanyeol’s still photo. His eyes, those beautiful brown eyes, looked sharply to my lens. As if he was staring at me, or my camera lens. I would be lying if I remained calm when I looked deeply into the photo. Suddenly, I remembered my rapid heartbeat when I saw Chanyeol’s eyes were on my camera lens from the moment he stepped into the runway, strutting towards the end and when he the last pose at the end. He never took his eyes of my camera. Realizing I was staring at the screen in the present, I shook my head and shrugged away all the thoughts.

“What’s with his eyes?” I dumbly asked him.

“Don’t you feel anything when he stared at you? Josh told me he kept on staring at you when it’s his turn on the runway.”

“Nah. Probably it’s just the angle.”

“The angle? Sky, please. Josh is right beside you the whole time.”

“He overreacts on everything, Bri. Like you don’t know how he is. He is your best friend.”

“Girl, I’m positive his drama king was not taking over him when he’s behind the camera. For God’s sake, even Sasha and I saw it.”

My body tensed at Brian’s statement. I really didn't want to remind myself of what happened during D-Day but what he said kept on repeating in my head. A little vibration on my table snapped my thoughts. I immediately grabbed my phone and looked at the message I received.

jessica

2:30pm

come to my office. now.

I mentally thanked God for the lifesaver He sent to me from above. Before Brian could stop me, I closed the Adobe Photoshop window and eject my USB drive. I walked towards Jessica’s office without saying goodbye to Brian or replying to Brian’s reminder about ‘dinner at Clara’s at 7!’ we planned this morning. I threw a smile at Elena when I arrived at my editor-in-chief’s office and knocked on her door. A small ‘come in’ was heard and I immediately entered the room.

“Hey, Jess.”

“Hi.” She responded dully. “Sit.”

Although I was a little taken aback of her quiet voice because Jessica Jung is loud normally, I just shrugged away the thought and sat on one of the seats in front of her. I was about to open my mouth when she beat me to it.

“Sky.”

“What’s up?” I tried to sound cheerful to ease up the mood. “You looked like you missed the mega-sale in Gucci.”

When Jessica kept her straight face on, I sat up straight. This means business. This means real is about to happen.

“I’m sorry. Did I do something bad?” I asked her slowly. “Am I getting fired?”

“You’re not getting fired.” She threw me an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry but...you’re getting transferred.”

My body froze. Transferred? Back to Seoul? Home? I have no idea if I am tearing up inside at the thought of going home after five years in the States or about getting transferred and leave my loved ones here. I heard Jessica sighed. Darting my eyes back to her, I opened my mouth to ask but Jessica again cut in.

“I really tried to convince Ailee. But she really wants you to work in Seoul again.”

“But why?” I raised my voice a little. “Why they asked me to transfer back? Why me?”

“Myungsoo quit so sudden last week. Saying about better offers from other publishing. They have rookie photographers and interns but our CEO and BODs aren’t satisfied with the quality of their photos. They only put their trust on you now because there is no way they could find another photographer. Even the BODs want you back in Seoul again.”

I ran my hands along my grey bob hair. My head worked really hard to digest everything. I tried to balance between the pros and cons of going back home and work in Allure Korea again. I really miss Seoul and I never come home ever since I stepped in here. It will be a good environment change too. The transition from New York to Seoul will be a little hard though because of the time-zone. I need to prepare for jetlag after the long flight. That was what I dealt with during the first few weeks after I first arrived here five years ago.

I focused my eyes on the view of New York City behind Jessica from the high glass surrounding her office.

Five years are enough, I guess.

***

Another shot of American Airline plane taking off from the runway of JFK Airport was saved into my Nikon D7000. The international departure hall was filled with people from all around the world, waiting for their flights to foreign countries. People with business suits, backpackers, families, groups of students, you name it. I looked at the surroundings before throwing my focus to the runway again. Looking at planes taking off and touching down are one of my favourites whenever I am in the airport. I feel like I am a kid when I look at the planes high above making their way through the skies.

The last issue I worked with Allure has been published and the fresh first copy from the printer was now lying on my lap. A gift from the team. Well, one of the gifts. I will literally kill them if they only give me a magazine as a farewell gift. I flipped through the pages. In the editor’s note, a group photo of the whole Allure team was placed below Jessica’s note of the month. Farewell notes were attached there too. I enjoyed my few last days hanging out with Brian, Jongin and all my dear ones in Brooklyn. They even sent me to the airport a few hours before.

To be honest, my heart and soul are not ready for Seoul. Yes, I miss my homeland. Yes, I miss my friends there. But there is something that makes me so nervous about going back to Seoul.

A person, to be exact.

Ever since I met Chanyeol again the other day, my heart was not in ease. I keep on thinking about it. Not that I ever stopped thinking about him. I never forget about him. Although one of my main goals of moving here five years ago was to move on from the tall guy, the feelings are getting stronger throughout those years. No matter how much I tried to forget about him, whatever I did will lead me back to him again. Heck, even shopping for groceries will make me remember about Chanyeol. I hate it but I could not help myself.

I know I am an idiot for waiting for someone who had hurt me countless times. A sane person will leave a jerk like that. Brian gave up on trying pairing me with his eligible (and straight) bachelor friends after three years. He felt disappointed and impressed with my level of loyalty for Chanyeol. He could not understand the fact I forgive him easily but hard to forget.

You could say I am still waiting for a stupid miracle will happen that will turn my seven years of unrequited love for Chanyeol into a happy ending. My instinct told me Chanyeol will be waiting for me at the end of the path, waiting for me to proceed with another phase of life. I have a strong feeling that going back to Seoul will change my life forever. And Chanyeol will be part of it, holding my hand to face whatever waiting for me in the future.

I will wait for it.

“Attention to all passenger of Korean Air 81 to Incheon, South Korea, please proceed to the gate for boarding process. The elderlies, disables, pregnant women and children, please proceed to priority lane. First class will be first to board, followed by business class and economy class. Please prepare your identification card or passport together with your boarding pass for the final check-in process. Thank you for the cooperation.”

I slowly pulled the business class boarding pass, another gift from my whole team who chipped in to pay for it, from my bag pack before placing the bag on my shoulder. I passed my boarding pass to the smiling airline staff. She returned my boarding pass and showed me the way to proceed. I thanked her before walking through the aerobridge towards the waiting Korean Air plane. A handsome flight attendant greeted me as soon as I entered the plane and guided me to my seat. I was so happy to have a window seat. Thanking the FA, I placed my bag in the compartment after pulling out my mp3 player with my earphones before taking my seat. While listening to the music, I enjoyed the last view of the country I have been staying at for five years.

After the boarding ended, the plane moved from the gate to the runway. I smiled at the airline staff who waved to their FA friends. The FA then proceed to flight safety demonstration, which I did not focused on — I want to go home fast I do not care about where the life jacket is. Besides, the demonstration is similar with other flights as well. I have been into too many flights that I could recite what they will say in my head. We passed by some planes with pilots around them. I saw them waving and gave mock salute — probably to the pilots for this flight — and I smiled again.

“Cabin crew; please be seated for take-off.”

The plane stay still for a moment before I could feel inertia took over me when the plane went to full speed to fly up. I felt a little lightheaded when the plane finally took off to the night sky. I looked out the window to see the night view of Big Apple.

Thank you for the memories, New York.

I’m going home.