Dear Junyoung,

Maybe my friends are right. Maybe I'm not well. I don't know why. But I feel perfectly fine! I'm not coughing or sneezing. I have been tired lately...But not because of my lack of sleep, but...maybe because of life. I can't just die though, right? Everything I learned until now would be a waste.

But maybe I'm mental. Maybe I'm not. I don't know anymore. What am I doing anyway? Writing letters to you? Do you even read them?

What am I doing...I'm getting crazy...Maybe I just need to calm down...

I'm sorry if I'm scaring you. 

Moving along, I saw your performance in Japan! You did so well. I wish I was there. But, I guess we can't ever meet right? Nana says that there's a chance that I can actually be with you. Pfft. That's a joke right? We're eight years apart with no luck. I doubt it.

It would be the biggest dream though if I ever met you. No one has the slightest idea how eager I am to meet you. I would sob and cry.

Then maybe end my life right there.

Kristine