So, this story's finally over(took me long enough), and now it's time for some explanations. 

I have a lot to say.

First, let's start with the general plot of the story. Now, when I first got the idea for this story, I didn't really have a generalized plot in my mind; I just had the idea. But, since I knew I'd forget about it if I didn't write it down, I quickly just made a short foreword for it, but when I first 'published' the story I didn't know who to make the main character, so I put no tag(we'll get into that later). I kind of neglected the story after that; like I knew it was there and I knew it existed but I just didn't know how to like start the story and what to revolve it around. After awhile I just kinda disregarded it and eventually forgot about it. Then I started a different story a few months later, and after I posted the first chapter for that story, I was browsing through my story list and I was reminded of this one. I was like 'um, ok so I need to start this but I literally still have no tag and I don't know who to make the main character.' Then I remembered the system I used to find the main character for the other story I just mentioned. (which is basically just where I randomly scroll through my music and stop on one song and whichever song I stop on, I look at the group who sang it and then I scroll through the members of the group and then whoever I stop on I make that my main character.) It's a weird system, but like it works. It's helped me out with finding the plot for both stories so :/ Well anyway, with this story, I had a bit of a dilemma, because I began writing the introduction, and when I was writing the introduction, I had the idea to make this a crappy one-shot story(that obviously didn't happen). So the reason why the introduction sounds more kind of like an autobiography is because it was supposed to be one. I was going to make the one-shot kind of like an Old Eunji telling her grandkids or whatever a flashback of her and the red string(meaning, I wasn't going to end this story too tragically). BUT THEN... I was like writing it and of course while I'm writing it, I'm thinking about the story plot in the whole(I mean, doesn't everyone do this?). So I was like 'ok but would it give the impact that I want to give with just one slimy little chapter' and I decided no it wouldn't. But I posted the introduction anyway, as like a little preview. I kind of thought it was a good thing that I stopped at 'eventually I became a young adult' because then I wouldn't been in a real dilemma as to how to end this story without contradicting myself(that's a difficult thing to do cus frankly, I contradict myself ALL the time). So while most of my stories don't really go through much thought process, this one actually did(so many moments when I just looked at a blank document with 12736487563 ideas swirling in my head and not knowing how to organize them). Without much thought, I kind of wrote the first chapter(Nice and Straight) because the way I wrote the chapter, I could alter this story however which way I want without having to change that particular chapter(I know, I'm a genius[I'm not]). Btw, funny story. Mini autobiography time. I'm still only a measly student trying to graduate school so after class ends, I need my parents to pick me up :/ but then one day I had to take the bus and go to my dad's meeting office cus he was having a looooooooooooooooooooong meeting with a bunch of other ppl so I just sat at their kitchen eating all their food and doing homework. At some point I finished my homework and I got bored of doing math problems(yes, I do math problems when I'm bored) so I just kinda started ing around on my computer but then like I was running out of battery so I was like wHAT DO I DO FOR THE NEXT 4 HOURS ALSDKJH and I took out my phone and started browsing through my stories again, and I stumbled upon this story(again) and I was like it Imma just write detailed chapters representing the different strings that I mentioned in the introduction(since I already had a chapter named Nice and Straight). Hence, the randomass triple update that I did that one day. Eventually I went home and updated them on my computer and not to be cocky here but I was pretty ing proud of myself for coming up with the genius idea(I was also very proud of the way I portrayed the emotions cus without alla y'all having to remind me, I knew I portrayed them really well[it was easy for my to portray the angry ones cus I'm not a very happy person and I'm stressed all the time]) so of course this story was in my mind for a pretty ing long time. But then, dilemma number 2 because I didn't know how to continue this story. SOOOO many questions in my head like, how do I continue this story without ing it up? What do I even make the story about? How do I portray dialogue? Needless to say, I was brained. But one of the main reasons why I was brained was cus Sungjae wasn't supposed to be part of this story. My original intent for this story contained no other named characters except Eunji(even then, I wasn't going to mention her name in this story cus most of my stories don't mention the main characters' names) but then I was writing Red String Cut and I was like 'you know what it' and I just made Sungjae a part of this story. Which actually turned out to be a great idea cus then I suddenly got like 1347823657283 ideas on how to move this story. Neeways, that's basically how I came up with this story plot.

I just spent a long time writing about the main plot, so now we're going to talk about the ending. How did I know how to end this story? How exactly did I want to end this story? Now, you've got to keep this in mind, even when I first came up with the idea for this story, even though I didn't know how I'd go about writing it, I knew I didn't want a happy ending. Now of course, the question what the was I thinking when I wrote that in the foreword came to mind so many times. Yeah, this story ed me up hardcore(I honestly don't even know why or how). But of course, throughout the entire process of writing this story, from beginning to end the ending of this story never left my mind. Like, I'd be writing about the part where Naeun almost got forcefully butted by Ilhoon and I'd still be thinking more strongly about how I'd end this story than the scene(which evidently didn't happen. Bummer.) because I'm sure you all know, every detail in every story always always has to relate to the ending of the story. You can't like have someone be a very happy person both inside and out and then decide they want to kill themselves like some people do that but that's a ty story(and by that, I mean it wouldn't have given much of the impact I was thinking about). And that's coming from me<<#1 at writing ty stories. So, I knew I had to end the story tragically, somehow. I'll have you know now, I'm not very good at happy endings. Like, I'd try but it'd fail miserably(trust me, I've tried). I'm much better at portraying tragedy only because everything negative I portray is something I've felt myself(the heart burning, the suffocation, the choking, etc.) but positive things are hard for me to personally connect with(don't ask why because I don't even know why). So after I like legitimately started the story(I'd say that's around Red String Cut) the ending of this story filled my head basically until I ended this story. Like mentioned in the previous chapter, I had soooo many ideas for how to end this story. And of course, one of them was suicide. Thing about suicide is, I've written suicide a lot. And generally, it's easy for me to portray how it feels while the act of self harm is happening(I promise you, I've never self harmed myself) I don't know why. But, I thought about it, and I thought suicide was just such a cliche way to end this story and it's really not the best way out of it either. Like, I just thought in the whole, suicide was a bad idea, also because with the way I was writing this story, I didn't think how I could relate suicide to Eunji. This, of course, was before I wrote Sadness Comes With a Question. After I wrote that chapter, holy , I got bombarded with these confusing ideas coming from I don't ing know where. Ok, they weren't confusing. But, all of them were contradicting every plan I had for this story and I was like what the fuuuuuuuuu- Ahem. Anyway, I got a lot of thoughts from that chapter. After thinking about it for a long time(and I really do mean, a long time) even the possibility of a happy ending came to thought. How, you ask? How could I possibly come up with a happy ending from a chapter as depressing as Sadness Comes With a Question? Cus I'm a genius that's how(no that's not why). It's because I revolved that chapter around Bomi not having much a choice in her life but to become a e. But think about it, I could've just ended the chapter with 'sadness comes with a question' but I didn't. Instead, I chose to end it with 'sadness comes with a question, but happiness isn't always the answer.' Now, what the does that mean? Even I didn't know what that meant, even though I was the one writing it(basically I just wrote it cus I thought it sounded cool). But then I was thinking about it, right? And I was like, so if happiness isnt the answer, then what is? (of course, the answer to that isn't really relevant to the story, but I'm explaining right now how it could have been) With that one sentence, I could've changed the entire plot. I could've contradicted both plans I had for this story. I could have contradicted them by actually ending this story with a happy ending . Ok, so pray explain, how? I'll tell you how. Like I said, I didn't know what I meant when I said 'happiness isn't always the answer.' So I was thinking about the chapter in general(and of course, I kept rereading it to completely absorb what the I had just written cus frankly, I usually don't know what kind of I write down until I've read it myself. You don't know how many times I'm mind blown by my own writing, it's kinda stupid) and I realized how I kinda revolved it around Eunji constantly reminding Bomi that yes she did have a choice. Now, what the ? Because, obviously, Bomi never did have a choice. But is that true? By giving Bomi a choice in life, I could have given this story a complete 360 degree turn(of course, I didn't cus I'm a sadistic ). If I'd given Bomi a choice in life, then there were two things that could have happened to Sungjae. Either he becomes completely irrelevant to this story, or he becomes an even more crucial part to the development of this story(you can ask how but I'll give a really bullshat response, just saying). So, now you know that this story actually could have ended quite happily. But after Sadness Comes With a Question, I dived more into the idea of suicide, because at this point, it made more sense(to me at least). I left the end with a cliffhanger(ok but like was that even a cliffhanger[it really wasn't]), because it's always more fun to know what the readers think will happen or did happen. Did Eunji die? Did Sungjae save her? etc. etc. I'm not answering any of those questions for you unless I decide to write  sequel but that's highly unlikely(I'd rather not brain myself again).

THE CHARACTER INCEPTION HOLY . I'm just gonna say this now, I didn't plan it. It was completely uncalled for. Like, I got the idea of it after I finished writing Sadness Comes With a Question(now that I think about it, I got a lot of ideas after that story. zam). Cus, think about it, I was about to make Bomi a real character. I was || this close to revealing her name. But then one thing led to another and I ended up not doing it. But like, when I got the idea of it after Sadness Comes With a Question, I didn't really think about the whole of Apink and BTOB. I just thought about Bomi. Then I uploaded Ring Around the Finger and while I was writing the part where Naeun almost got butted by Ilhoon, while I was writing the details of the physical features of the characters, for some reason I was like 'wow this offending man really resembles Ilhoon and the girl resembles Naeun' and then while I was portraying Naeun's boyfriend, I was like 'damn he sounds a lot like Hyunsik' so THAT'S where I got the idea to make every character depict a member from Apink and BTOB. But then I came to the last chapter and I was like... ok but who does Minhyuk portray... cus I had no character that was a crazy fit guy who found joy in challenging other people to athletic games that he knows he's going to win. Then I was thinking about it, and I was like, 'I gave every character mentioned here a name except the fat weeb that houses with Peniel.' Then I thought, 'wouldn't it be funny if Minhyuk, who in real life is a really fit and outgoing guy was portrayed as an introverted weaboo?' So that's how Minhyuk became a fat guy with a japanese body pillow #sorrynotsorry That's basically how I came up with that inceptionass thing.

The titles. UGH. THE MOTHER ING TITLES. I had a real dilemma with this, cus I thought it'd be really redundant to make the first letter of each title say RED STRING especially after I had like 5 chapters already before it that doesn't spell anything. I was || this close to deleting the whole story and starting a g a i n. Good thing I didn't. I was thinking and thinking and tinkig and thasdkngna and ktahdg and kgja sdgjhdkf. Yeah, that's basically what my mind looked like while I was akdjghf. Since this story revolved around Sungjae's cut string, I was like, 'ok do I make it spell RED STRING or RED STRING CUT' and I was like I'm not giving myself that much homework screw it so yeah. RED STRING. 

Title names. The last three chapter titles are actually song titles.
In an Expression of the Inexpressible-Blonde Redhead
Not Too Late-Blonde Redhead
Gonna Get Mine-Halestorm
They're all really good songs; I recommend listening to them. While we're on the topic of songs, I suggest rereading Gonna Get Mine while listening to Mazzy Star's Look On Down From the Bridge. I think it really connects with the last chapter. See, the reason why I made these last three chapters was cus 1. I didn't know what to make them about and 2. I didn't know how to name them. You know, the weirdest things give me ideas on how to write stories. For In an Expression of the Inexpressible, I not only didn't know how to name it (because how many good titles start with an i) but I also didn't know how to end it. So I browsed through my songs(again) to find the right title for this chapter, and stumbled upon In an Expression of the Inexpressible. This album had a ing ton of good songs(Blonde Redhead in general is just a really good band and I love them) but reread Sadness Comes With a Question(wow I'm mentioning this chapter a lot) while listening to Four Damaged Lemons by Blonde Redhead. You'll yourself, I promise you. But like, just think for a moment. WHAT THE DOES IN AN EXPRESSION OF THE INEXPRESSIBLE MEAN???? I you not I spent like 5 hours thinking about this before I actually wrote the god forsaken chapter. Cus as the ING WRiTer I have to kNOw what my ing means. I mean, hOW DOES AN INEXPRESSIBLE THING SHOW eXPrEsSIoN??????? Like, ?????? Just, ?????? And then I was like, ok throughout this entire story, how many times has Eunji actually like shown her inner thoughts to Sungjae like physically?  Literally, like once(lowkey regretted it but whatever I'm in a screw it mood rn). sO I was like 'ok ok'-wait hold the phone I'm feeling so hyped right now while writing this i need to take a break...1 minute later and I'm ok now ok I'll continue-ok you know what, I don't even know where I'm going with this so I'm just gonna continue on. For Gonna Get Mine, I was originally gonna name it Goodbye Agony(which is a song by Black Viel Brides[ik wow so emo]) because I thought it made sense but then i was like 'ok but liiiiiiiiiiike' and I personally think Gonna Get Mine makes a little more sense cus this entire time, Eunji's been trying to reach out to Sungjae's string, and she's been on a long and painful journey to find her own string. And, the story also ends with Eunji finding her own string so like it makes sense. She's literally going to get her own string. So yeah.

OMG EUNJI'S STRING. ASDLKJGH. HER GOD FORSAKEN DAM NED ING STRING. UGH. Where was it? Why didn't it show for so long? WAS BLOOD THE ONLY THING THAT COULD MAKE IT SHOW? , I don't know????? Like I just wrote the stupid story the way I wanted to I didn't really give it much thought sTOP ASKING ME ASLKJDGHKJ
coughs.
I mean, yeah, I thought about it too. I was like, ok, but does blood r e a l l y have to be the thing that trigger's Eunji's dormant string? I personally don't think it h a d to be blood, but I don't really know what else could've triggered it. I think generally, it just had to be some sort of pain, or something connecting Eunji to Sungjae. Who knows, maybe it wasn't the blood that triggered Eunji's string. Maybe it was the ring that Sungjae put around Eunji's ing finger. Who the knows? I sure as hell don't.

I think I've answered all your questions? I didn't really get much in the first place. i'M SO ING TIRED this story really pulled all my wits. PLEASE TELL ME YOU READ ALL OF THIS IF NOT I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND I WILL SHANK YOU.  Like, i'm not joking(i'm joking).

ANYWAY THANK YOU ALL FOR READING THIS PIECE OF TRASH I LIKE TO CALL A STORY TBH IT WAS REALLY FUNNY READING ALL YOUR COMMENTS ABOUT EUNJI'S STRING WHEN THAT WAS LIKE THE MOST IRRELEVANT POINT OF THIS STORY I WAS LIKE LOLOLOLOL

OH SPEAKING OF YOUR COMMENTS ABOUT EUNJI'S STRING I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING. I WAS ORIGINALLY NOT GOING TO HAVE EUNJI HAVE A STRING AT ALL. THAT'S WHAT I MEANT IN THE FOREWORD WHEN I SAID 'I DECIDED I WON'T WANT MY CHARACTERS TO BE HAPPY' I WAS GOING TO END THIS STORY WITH EUNJI HAVING NO STRING. WELL NOW YOU KNOW. ONCE AGAIN, THANK YOU ALL AND NOW I'M GOING TO HIBERNATE FOR 3 YEARS.

Also, if you have any more questions that I haven't answered, feel free to ask them!

Edit: I FORGOT TO MENTION THE TENSE OF THIS STORY. Ok, so obviously, all of the chapters in this story are in past tense. There's no doubt about that. BUT, the last chapter, Gonna Get Mine is in pRESENT TENSE. Now, why is that? That is because all of the previous chapters are the events that are swirling around Eunji's mind while she's filling the tub with water. These are all the accounts that make Eunji go mad with depression, eventually leading up to her suicidal act. The narration in the last chapter is what is happening in the now. All of the chapters before it are the few particular events that Eunji remembers. The nice chapters with her being around with Sungjae is what makes her rethink her suicidal decision(which is why the chapters alternate from the depressing flashbacks to the positive ones) but eventually, as the saying goes, it takes 9 positive things to outdo 1 negative, and in the aftermath, Eunji has more negatives in her life than she can bear. , that's deep, even for me. Anyway, I hope this story gave the effect and impact I wanted it to give. Please share your thoughts! I WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S IN YOUR MIND(totally not creepy)

Edit #2: Remember 'Sadness Comes With a Question'? I decided to make a story based off of that chapter so if you're wondering what happened or what might have happened to Bomi then please feel free to check it out.

-K.o