https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gmd1HVGBzk

One good thing about television is that the strings aren't visible through the thick screen of pixels and ions. Even though it is often boring, I like to keep it on, so as to distract my thoughts. It doesn't help much. 

Today, instead of opening the door, I keep it closed. I keep it closed, but I keep it unlocked. And when Sungjae comes once again, I don't go to the door. I don't wait for him to leave. I turn on the television. I turn on the water. I turn my back to the door.

Sungjae once told me, I'll always be waiting. I look at the item in my right hand; I look at the water. I turn to look at myself in the mirror. Sungjae said he'll always be waiting, but what is he waiting for? Me? What does he want with me? What does his string want with me? I look at my hand. I have no string. I never had a string. I may never have a string. A tear pulls itself out of my eye and drips down my cheek like rain against a window. I give myself one last look in the mirror, showcasing a small smile before stepping into the tub. 

I could have brought ice, I could have numbed myself. But I don't want this to be painless. I want to feel the pain. I want to feel the pain I've been feeling all these years. I want to feel it. I want to feel it flowing out slowly and painfully. Because I deserve it.

But why? Why do I deserve it? I sit down, my clothed bottom reaching the floor of the tub. Why do I deserve it? Tears continue to roll down my eyes but I don't wipe them. I rest two fingers over the pulsating vein on my wrist. This irregular beat I feel must be the beat of my heart. I wonder how through all these years my heart continues to beat, never letting me down. But I feel a knot. I feel a knot in my veins, resembling that of the tangled string. And what must be done to a tangled vein, that must be done to a tangled string? It must be untangled. Whether it's untangled with a cut, or whether it untangled on its own. Holding the razor, I decide, this one must be untangled with a cut. 

So without hesitation, I press down on the tangled vein that gives me the beat of my heart. It hurts, oh how it hurts. But I hold in my scream, I hold in my tears. I continue to cut, until I feel I've successfully untangled the knot.And once I feel that I have, I take out the metal, and lay my now cut string into the water. Red disperses through the water, looking like clouds gracefully floating around, dancing, It's a beautiful, painful process. My smile stays as the red clouds grow bigger and bigger, my tired eyes threatening to fall.

The television can no longer be heard. The knocking, the pounding. The banging, can no longer be heard. I wearily look down to the floor beside my tub, and a glowing string fills my eyes. Sungjae?

"Eunji?" The cut end of the string rises. What? "Eunji! What are you doing?" The string approaches me. I feel intimidated, but I do nothing. "Eunji, please, you can't do this!" His voice fades away as a dial of the phone is heard. My own vision begins to fade away, but the string remains clear. The string remains glowing. My cut arm is suddenly raised, and a cold substance is felt spilling down my finger. It's a ring. Sungjae's hands hold my one hand. My focus strays from Sungjae to the line of blood that flows down my arm. It circles the ring around my finger, flows along the end of my finger, and spills onto a substance. It doesn't hit the floor. It meets the cut end of Sungjae's string. With the little strength I have left in me, I watch my dripping blood connect with Sungjae's cut string. I watch the string and the blood meld into one, my liquid blood turning into solid string. It's so beautiful.  It's so beautiful, it's almost as if the string had won again. 

"Well look at that, I do have a string." And my world turns black.

a/n

this god damned story is fINALLY OVER

idk I like tried to reference the other chapters in this but I ended up referencing only 2 chapters :/ btw idk if you guys noticed this but

Red String Cut
Everyone Has a String
Dear Mother,
Sadness Comes With a Question
Tired of this World
Ring Around the Finger
In an Expression of the Inexpressible
Not Too Late
Gonna Get Mine

(read the first letter of each chapter)

Somehow I did this while also making the titles of each chapter actually relevant to the actual story. Hah, won't you look at that.

One more thing, I said in a past chapter that every character symbolizes a member from each group. Nobody really guessed it like I expected but oh well, I'll tell you now who I had represented as who.

Eunji's Mother=Chorong [Apink]

Eunji's Father=Changsub [BTOB]

Peniel=well, Peniel [BTOB]

Peniel's Roommate(the fat weeb)=Minhyuk [BTOB]

The Girl with the Cut String=Bomi [Apink]

The Man Obviously Married=Eunkwang [BTOB]

Girl 1 Surrounding the Married Man=Hayoung [Apink]

Girl 2 Surrounding the Married Man=Namjoo [Apink]

The Reasonably Sized Man Cornering the Smaller Girl=Ilhoon [BTOB]

The Smaller Girl=Naeun [Apink]

The Boy with a Hearty Smile Both in the Lips and the Eyes=Hyunsik [BTOB]

Sungjae=well, Sungjae [BTOB]

Our Main Character=Eunji [Apink]

And there you have it. See, I told you everyone represented a member. I don't know how I managed to pull this off but somehow I did. I didn't even plan this when I first started the story. It just happened and I was like 'hey you know what would be really funny' and yeah.

By the way, in a previous chapter I mentioned that I was  leaning towards my most rejected idea on how to end this story. That is true. Suicide was the idea I wanted to stray away from the most. I wanted Eunji's death to be more unexpected, thus making it more painful. Sketch of what my original idea was: eunji finally finds hope in fate with sungjae so they're out on a nice date after sungjae asks her to be his girlfriend (she said yes) and then while they're crossing the street, a truck hits eunji and she dies but she sees that she does in fact have a string before she dies. Of course, I was gonna make it more detailed to, you know. Make it more of a story. But one thing led to another and I was like, I can't have all these corrupted chapters and then end this story that nicely. Like, that's just not. no. No, life doesn't work that way. So I was writing and writing and writing and I came to the realization that  I'm going towards suicide which is exactly what I told myself not to do. But like I mentioned in the foreword, this story isn't supposed to be happy, and it's not supposed to end happy. So there you are~ your nice Eunji/Sungjae story. 

p.s notice how all the other chapters are in past tense but this chapter is the only chapter that's in present tense.

IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS PLEASE COMMENT DOWN BELOW I'D LOVE TO HEAR FEEDBACK! THANK YOU ALL WHO HAVE CONTINUOUSLY BEEN SUPPORTING ME THROUGHOUT THE WRITING OF THIS STORY. I HOPE YOU ALL HAD AS MUCH FUN READING THIS AS I DID WRITING IT. 

-K.o