Mom wakes me from a deep sleep. My mind is fuzzy, but I manage a groan and roll over in an attempt to get away from her. She let's out a soft sigh. "Eunha-ya,wake up. I need to talk to you. "she says

  I let out an annoyed breath and roll to her face. Her dark eyes are worried,like shes afraid if she looks away, I'll disappear or something. " I told you last night. I'm fine. I'm just catching up on some sleep"

"No it's not about that. I've something for you"

"What?"

"I...... um......." There's a small notebook in her hand and she hands it to me. Jinyoung asked me to give this to you. Before he die. " Her voices shakes on the last word

             I freeze. " What is this?"

  She shrugs. " It's for you. He wanted you to read it."

  I take it. It's one of those notebooks that I used in a few classes at school. My name is written on the front in his handwriting. I run my fingertips over it,  not sure if I want to open it and read the contents. I'm still feeling so many emotion and if this is his journal about the last day of his life or something...... I don't think I'll be able to handle it. 

             "Have you----"

            "No." She shakes her head. "I haven't looked at it"

            "Oh" I believe her,  but for some reason it makes me more nervous. Why would he left something like this just for me? Did he have some deep, dark secret his keeping and wanted to tell me after he died? And why did