RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW

“Sehun, are you okay?” Jongin asks, worry written all over his face. His boyfriend is spacing out, which isn’t unusual since Sehun does it a lot, but Jongin worries nonetheless. It’s hard to understand Sehun at times, although they have been with and there for each other for a long time.

They met in middle school and hit it off right away. Sehun’s quiet nature matched well with Jongin’s more introverted personality. Nonetheless, Jongin had been the one to approach Sehun first, though it had only been for a group project. Had he not been assigned to work with Sehun back then, who knows, maybe they wouldn’t be where they are now.

Jongin remembers fondly the way Sehun’s eyes lit up when he saw Jongin’s collection of anime merchandise at home when they worked on their homework and assignment together. Jongin had learned that Sehun loves anime and manga just as much as he does, but apart from that, they both share an equally great interest in sports. Being a bit shy though, they didn’t try out for soccer club that year. They did that together the next year though.

It’s that smile that had drawn Jongin in, he thinks. Sehun doesn’t show many emotions, but when he is very happy, he can’t hide it. The moment Sehun loses control over his expressions and actions is when Jongin likes Sehun the most, the moments in which Sehun is simply being himself.

Of course, right now Sehun is being himself, too, but he’s absent-minded which throws Jongin off a bit. He knew that dating Sehun wouldn’t be easy, but he couldn’t help it. He had been in love with Sehun for too long and he had been watching Sehun breaking apart slowly with his first relationship for too long. It was difficult, but Jongin managed to bring back Sehun’s smile after he was dumped by Junmyeon.

Jongin doesn’t hate Junmyeon. He had been a good boyfriend to Sehun. He had been Sehun’s first love, too. He does resent Junmyeon however, for taking some of Sehun’s firsts, but what he is most upset about is how painful he had made it for Sehun. He had been perfect, attentive, caring, to a point Sehun had fallen so far Jongin could barely pull him out after they broke up.

Junmyeon had given Sehun hope all along, although their relationship couldn’t be saved anymore. Jongin had known it. He had tried to talk Sehun out of it, but it’s all Junmyeon’s fault for trying when no matter how much they tried, they couldn’t stay together. Jongin had seen the love slowly fading - the way Junmyeon looked at Sehun didn’t resemble the way Jongin looked at Sehun anymore. He should have let go of Sehun earlier.

“I’m sorry, Jongin,” Sehun whispers and draws back Jongin