Another morning has arrived in Yesung’s life but it’s different. He wakes up with calm and peaceful mind. The past days were such a roller coaster of emotions. Today he has another thing to do. Very important thing. He is going to talk to his friends and his brother. He wants them to hear his side and hopefully he can hear their side too. No matter what will be the outcome later, he is ready. He is ready to fight back and face his fear.

As he steps inside the train, he sits on the available seat. He doesn’t scan around as usual since he knows pretty well where Kyuhyun is at now. Yesterday, he witnessed his friend’s breakdown, how he voiced his fear about death. It was overwhelming, to know that death can take Kyuhyun anytime. He cried along with his friend for hours until his parents arrive. He doesn’t know what he will do if he is in Kyuhyun’s position. Scared for sure but Kyuhyun still wants to fight back to keep living. He won’t lose to his friend, he will do the same.

Yesung reaches his school earlier, ignoring stares from the students. He doesn’t care about them anymore. As he walks towards his class, he spots Wendy and Sungmin in front of the pond near their class.

“Hi.” Yesung greets them. Both of them look surprised for seconds then awkwardly greets him back. “Can we talk during lunch break at the backyard? I want to tell you guys about something.”

Wendy and Sungmin look at each other before answering Yesung.

“Sure.” Sungmin says as Wendy nods in agreement.

Yesung smiles then goes to his class with light steps. He is ready to tell his friends about everything. If he wants them trust him, then he should trust them too. It’s such an unpleasant feeling to not know anything about your friends. He doesn’t want them to feel it longer. He is too busy to think what will he say first to his friends that he accidentally bumps on someone.

“I am sorr-“ He doesn’t finish his apology when he sees the person he bumps on is Kibum. Siwon is standing beside, it seems like they are busy talking with each other that they don’t see Yesung at first. They both look as surprised as Yesung.

“It’s okay.” Kibum says coldly and about to walk away when Yesung grips his wrist, stopping him instantly.

“Hyung.. Let’s.. let’s talk after school. I will wait at the back yard.”

“I am busy.” Kibum shakes his wrist, releasing Yesung’s grip.

Yesung takes a deep breath and smiles. “I will wait for you until you are not busy. I’ve been waiting you for 5 years, so I don’t mind waiting longer.” He shifts his gaze at Siwon and gives him a soft smile then walks away. He won’t back away easily, he will fight for his brother’s love. Even if at the end his brother still doesn’t want him, he doesn’t want to lose without trying. Drowning himself in self-pity won’t make him go anywhere.

//

Siwon stares at his friend who is still standing in silent after Yesung leaves. Somehow he is proud of how determined Yesung sounds before. He pats Kibum on the shoulder, bringing the man into reality.

“Go meet him later. Tell him about your and listen to his side too.”

Kibum swats Siwon’s hand away. “No. I am busy. We are busy and the festival is coming soon. I-“

“For god’s sake just talk to him!” Siwon shouts, drawing a curious stare from some students in hallway. “Stop finding excuses to avoid him! What are you scared for?! Are you scared that he will ruin your perfect family?”

“What.. what  the hell are you talking about?” Kibum pushes Siwon shoulder hard. “You don’t know anything about us! If you are my friend, stop meddling into my business!”

“You know what, Kibum? It’s because you are my friend that I am this nosy. Yes, I don’t know anything but for sure I know one thing. I know that you still want Yesung in your life. Don’t fool me because I’ve been your friend for almost three years!”

The hallway is getting crowded and some students are watching the scene in curiousity. That’s when Siwon realizes that they make a scene here. He steps back and takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself. His friend is really stubborn and he can’t help to laugh mentally about how stubborn Yesung before. They are really brothers after all.

“You’re still regretting that your parents get divorced right? You can’t turn back the time to the past but you sure can fix the present. Both of you aren’t kids anymore, talk to him. Man up, you are his older brother, not other way around.” With that Siwon leaves Kibum, scolding the students who have been watching them on his way.

Kibum closes his eyes and sighs.

It’s about time already

**

The bell for lunch break rings and Yesung immediately drags Sungmin outside, once he sees Wendy, he drags her along to the backyard. He is quite excited to talk again with both of them. He misses his friends after all. It’s really quiet without his two noisy friends.

“Ouch… Yesung! Slow down! What are you rushing for?” Sungmin complains as Yesung drags him by the arm.

Yesung doesn’t say anything and when he reaches their destination—under oak tree at the backyard—he plops down on the grass and motions his friends to sit too. His friends follow him quietly.

“Okay.. I am ready to tell you guys everything. First of all, I am sorry for everything. I don’t need you guys to forgive me but I want you to understand me. My story isn’t as amazing as both of you so regarding this, I hope we can stil be friends.”

Wendy and Sungmin keep silent as they stare at Yesung. No one says anything for seconds then Wendy mutters softly. “Tell us.”

Yesung takes a deep breath, ready to tell him everything. He starts from his father’s death, the abuse, until meeting his brother here, who is their school’s vice president. By the time he finishes, he can see how both of his friends look shocked. Their eyes wide in disbelief with mouth slightly hanging open. Yesung has a funny thought of expecting Sungmin to say ‘It feels like a drama!’ but what he actually does really caught him off guard. Sungmin tackles him into a hug. He is crying.

“Idiot! Why you never tell us about you! We may look like this but we can be serious too! You shouldn’t keep your problem to your self like this. We may not be able to help you but our shoulders are always available for you to lean on!” Sungmin sobs into his shoulder.

Wendy scoots closer and squeezes Yesung’s hand. Tears are flowing out from her eyes as she hiccups a little. It’s supposed to be funny sight but with Sungmin’s arms wrap around him and Wendy’s crying face, Yesung can’t help to break down in tears. Somehow he feels light, no more secrets, no more stupid fighting.

“I am sorry. I think a little of you guys. You must be worried about me.” Yesung hugs Sungmin back.

They all cry together until lunch break is over. As they walk back to their class, people keep staring at them. They are probably wondering why their eyes are swollen. Some students points their finger at Yesung as they whisper with each other.

“Stop pointing before I break your finger!” Sungmin hisses at the students. They ran away in fear.

“God, people should really mind their business if they know nothing!” Wendy says loudly.

Yesung smiles at his friends’ antics. It’s good to know that he has people to lean on. He is not alone anymore.

**

2.30 PM

It’ been 30 minutes since the school hours end. Yesung checks his wristwatch for the third time already. He is currently sitting on the bench at the backyard of his school. He is waiting for Kibum, even if the man said that he is busy. He doesn’t care, he will wait as long as possible. He twist his head to the side and a poster on nearby wall catches his attention. It’s about the upcoming festival in his school. He smiles when he thinks that his brother works hard to make the event successful. He somehow feels excited when he thinks that he can enjoy the festival with Sungmin and Wendy.

“Yesung.”

Yesung stiffens when he hears the familiar voice. He shifts his gaze and almost burst in tears when he sees it’s Kibum. His brother is actually coming. He really takes his time to meet him.

“Hyung! P-please sit.” Yesung stutters. He feels nervous now that he finally has a chance to talk his brother. He can’t go back now, he should stop bein