Chapter 10

My Huswife Gone Mad!

Ewon enters the house and spreads his hands, in one hand holding his bag and in the other holding his french cigarette holder, he stops near the piano in the corner and takes a fashion pose looking a little up still wearing his sunglasses and starts to speak in an annoying rich person's commanding tone "Jaebeom, for tonight's dinner, I would like to have some boiled asparagus...some black caviar, and a tapioca soup!

"Ra cad e?" Jay asks looking confused (ra cad e?-irish frase for say what?)

"I don't wanna hear that word in my house again!" Ewon warns Jay 

Taecyeon stares at Ewon like he is a random crazy person

"Please...how bad is the education level of the servants in the houses of the rich tobacco factory owners!" Ewon walks and stops in front of Jay "Sweetheart...it's just a simple soup! Put two bottles of champagne in the fridge...now gogogo!" Ewon says and head toward the stairs but stops at the sound of Taecyeon's voice

"Champagne?"

"Oh! You're here my friend?" turns to Taecyeon "I didn't noticed you!"

Taecyeon puts his hands on his waist looking at Ewon intimidating 

But Ewon doesn't care "Hahahaha..." Ewon leaves a mocking laugh "Will you stay for dinner? You know, I loose my appetite with the presence of the same person at the table all the time...and as far as I know, you don't like neither asparagus and neither caviar..." Ewon starts to climb the stairs "...my experience taught me that your tastes are towards 'lighter colors'!

"Ewon!!!" Taecyeon calls

Ewon stops and turns to look at him "Yes?"

"First of all, what are you wearing!?" Taecyeon asks looking at Ewon's weird clothes that make him stand out

"It's called high couture, darling...I didn't expect you to know about it anyway, huhu!"

"Are you alright or should I start yelling!?"

"Oh no~...you don't have a good voice to show off, silence s'il vous plait!" (French)

Taecyeon turns around feeling insulted "What is he talking about? I was a good rapper in high school!" says to himself

"Jaebeom, go to the kitchen darling and prepare everything I said, ok my boy?"

"I'll go Master but I don't know how to make that soup..." Jay stops talking when Ewon signals him to play along "Yes, ok, I'm going!" Jay goes to the kitchen

"Taecyeon, honey!" Ewon calls

"Yes?"

"Take care of the shopping, please!"

"Are you serious right now!?"

"There ARE  markets that provide everything...they must still be open...if you could kindly go now, my love!

"I'll call them then!" Taecyeon says and goes to reach the phone to call but Ewon stops him

"I believe you still have the muscles, you liked to show off to me before we get married, put them to good use and carry the bags yourself, yeobo~" Taecyeon looks at Ewon a little annoyed "...I understand...it must be so tiresome to do some deeds for your huswife...hohoho...and yet so pleasant to do the same deeds for somebody else, right?"

"Sure, yes...I'll go,why not, anything for you!" Taecyeon says trying to cover for himself from suspicion

"Taecyeon!" Ewon calls again

"Yes?"

"Please make sure that the champagnes are 'Sourire de Reims- Elite Blanc de Noirs- Vieilles Vignes Francaises- Nec Plus Ultra brut premiere cuvee!'"

"Can you repeat that one more time, SLOWLY?" Taecyeon asks

Ewon exhales an annoyed breath and look at Taecyeon "'Sourire de Reims- Elite Blanc de Noirs- Vieilles Vignes Francaises- Nec Plus Ultra brut premiere cuvee!'" This time says it faster on purpose and heads upstairs and hides behind the corner waiting for Taecyeon to leave

Taecyeon annoyed opens the door and leaves

Jay comes out of the kitchen and waits for Ewon to come down and admires him

"Like I would let him...like I would let him! I turned your Master into a remote controled car!" Ewon says to Jay and come down the stairs

"Wow, how you said all those things was amazing!"

"And how much I'll have to say!" Ewon takes off his hat and puts in on Jay's head, his glasses on Jay's shirt and his bag on Jay's hand "How much I'll have to say, with the disaster your Master brought to our home! One of us will send the other to the asylum, mark my words Jaebeom!" Ewon puts his cigarette holder on the ashtray on the table and goes to fix the back legs of the tiger carpet

"So that's why they were talking like that with the Doctor!"

"What doctor? The Doctor was here?"

"Master Taec send me to call him!"

"Really?"

"So I was pretending to clean and was listening to everything!"

"That's my boy!"

"Master, the things that happened here can only be described as 'Sodom and Gamourrah'!" (Sodom and Gomorrah)

"Described as what?"

"'Sodom and Gamourrah!'"

"'Gamourrah'? The way you go, you'll rewrite the Bible! Go on my boy!" Ewon says fixing the other leg of the carpet

Jay starts to fix the front legs "Master Taec says you don't do actions of a normal person!

"Really?"

"But the Doctor says that those are all scientific things!"

"Of course they are scientific things!"

"And the Master says 'Nah, he just pretends!'"

"Ah so I just pretend, huh?"

"So the Doctor says 'Let's a fhail amach!'" (A fhail amach-irish word frase for Find out)

"What did the Doctor say!?"

"'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"How did the doctor say!?"

"'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"What did the Doctor say exactly!?"

"'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"'Let's fail my march!? What march?"

"No, 'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"'Let's feel my touch!'"

"'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"'Let's see my crotch!'"

"No, 'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"'Let's scrach my watch!'"

"No, Master, 'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"'Falmach!'"

"'A fhail amach!"

"What the hell is he saying...God please help me! Say it again!" Ewon says to Jay

"AH!"

"AH!"

"FHAIL!"

"FHAIL!"

"AMACH!"

"AMACH! Amach? Amach!? I know that, I heard you say that before, it means 'out' right!?"

"'Let's a fhail amach!'" Jay tries harder hopeful now

"What is he saying...we cannot communicate!"

"'Let's a fhail amach!'" Jay repeats again desperately

"'Out'...they wanna do something with 'out'...! Go bring the dictionary from your room!" Ewon commands and Jay turns to go to his room but Ewon stops him "Get over here! Speak korean for God's mercy!!!" Ewon shouts loosing his patience

"'Let's a fhail amach!'"

"'Let's kick him out!'!?"

"'Let's a fhail amach!'!"

"'Let's strip him out!'! They wanna strip me out!?"

"Master, no, 'Let's a fhail amach!'!!!" Jay shouts and breathes heavily now 

Ewon puts his hands up signaling Jay to stop...after thinking a little, Ewon finally says "'Let's find out!'"

"What am I saying all this time!?" Jay says desperately but when he sees Ewon he backs away scared when Ewon grabs the nearby chair ready to throw it at him

"Is that what you say!? Is that what you say!?" Ewon asks angry but puts the chair back "Come over here...come over here! And how will they a fhail amach? I mean find out?"

Jay got closer "The Doctor says to Master 'You'll act sick too!'"

"What?" Ewon asks not expecting that "What? Your Master?" Jay nods his head "Will come to me acting like crazy!?"

"Yep!"

"Tonight we'll have a house party 'Big Bang' style, huh!? Why will your Master come acting like crazy to me? Tell me Jaebeomie!"

"Because the Doctor said that if Master Taec acts like crazy and he is faking it..."

"I'm the 'he'?"

"Yeah...he'll get scared...!"

"I'll get scared?"

"...and he'll stop!"

"Poor Taecyeon!"

"But if he's really a moron...I'm sorry!" Jay apologises

"Feel free, you already said so much...go on!"

"...he won't stop...he will be a consecutive moron!"

"'A consecutive moron!'?" Ewon asks and Jay nods his head slowly "That's the medical terminology right?" Jay simply stares at him "A medical termino...terminology..."

"Huh?" Jay asks confused not getting the meaning

"Forget it! Call Mr. Wooyoung to come down!" Jay reaches the phone and dials the Horvejkul's home number "How can this boy say one sentence with 6 different dialects and languages, can't even communicate in my own house here!"

"Ne...yoboseyo, Mr Woo, it's me Jay, come down quickly cause my Master wants you!"

Ewon heads toward the piano and sits down and takes a picture of Taecyeon "So tonight, you'll come and act all crazy on me? Come, I'll be waiting for you, we'll have so much fun together!" Ewon puts the picture back and stands up "Jaebeom, go to the kitchen and prepare everything I said, we are expecting people!"

"Master Wonnie?"

"What?"

"Can you tell me, that soup you said earlier, the 'Sabroca'!" (Tapioca)

"What soup?" Ewon looks at Jay weirdly

"The 'Sabroca'!"

"'Sabroca' soup!?" Ewon with a serious face walks slowly towards Jay who takes a few steps back "What is it you wanna know, my boy?"

"How to cook it!"

"How to cook it? How to cook the 'Sabroca' soup?" Jay nods "You'll take the small pot...the one you boil the milk that you drink every night and you'll fill it halfway with water and then you'll put 10-15 screws..." Now Jay got confused "...after it's boiled well, you'll start swallowing the hot screws down but make sure you swallow one screw at a time, got it? You can go now!"

Jay all confused head to the kichen but turns back to Ewon and asks for confirmation "Screws!?"

"Screws!" Ewon insists

The door bell rings and Jay goes to open the door but turns and asks again "Screws!?"

"Yes, I said screws!" Jay goes to open the door "You're 20 years too early to even try to drive crazy, you brat!" Ewon says to himself

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Comments

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babikhun
#1
Chapter 12: let the real game begin, very interesting. now I wanna know how taec will react ;)
and woo believing his khunnie? really? please update soon ^^
babikhun
#2
Chapter 10: I missed this funny read, welcome back :)
taeckhun are so funny too, but who‘s really the one with vic? poor woo and ewon to have these two, still haven‘t seen how grandpa channie is ;)
thanks for the update, will be waiting for the next :)
babikhun
#3
Chapter 7: oh my god she wants taec, poor ewon, was supposed to be helping woo, now what‘s gonna happen :(
can‘t wait for the next update ^^
babikhun
#4
Chapter 6: taecyeon and the phone line irritate me, I feel bad for ewon, and khun wth is wrong with woobaby to think of vic.
btw I think khun is more averge to tall not short
babikhun
#5
Chapter 4: this is so funny to read, I loveeee it, Ewon and woo are so cute, hope their plan works ^^
babikhun
#6
Chapter 1: sounds interesting, but I think chansung is 37 lol