Kim Jonghyun.

"Are you crazy? Have you attempted getting checked out at the doctors?" I scolded the girl, yet she just kept looking at me with curious, doubtful eyes. I sighed, continuing, "Do you know what it means to ask a man-- a grown up man who's over twenty-one-- to stay over at your own home?"

She just smiled, walking over to gently pat my back.

Then she said, "Of course I know what it means. But obviously I wouldn't dare let you touch me in such a matter. I'll personally throw away your precious belongings if you do attempt to do so. And that includes that little pajama get-up you have going for you."

That had me thinking back to how I got kicked out by my grandfather, and after that thought, had passed by, a new surge of anger had crept up in me. If that old geezer ever found out about me living with a girl (which he will eventually), then he would go bonkers. I can just imagine him standing up on his own two feet to walk all the way over to this apartment just to throw his walking stick at the window.

How I would love to see him bow down on his knees, just begging for me to come back to him.

And so I answered, "Well I guess this could work out fine." I did an elevator look, checking her out from top to bottom, "I mean, after all, there's nothing to really look forward to with that kind of underdeveloped body. But-"

"Excuse me? Did you say underde-"

"Can you let me finish?"

She bit he lip, eyebrows scrunched downwards. After that, she blew up her cheeks, eye brows still scrunched, and trying to look cute, I guess? It wasn't working out to well. In the end, she just ended up looking constipated.

I lightly chuckled to myself. As if I'd ever try to tap that kind of a woman, right? Exactly.

"Anyways, back to what I was saying. Why's there a need for me to be your boyfriend? Just go off and find one on your own. I'm sure there's a whole bunch of bookworms that would match well with someone like yourself."

This time, she staggered her feet along the laminated wooden flooring, just to knock her fist at my chest. Surprisingly, it hurt. And when I say it hurt, I mean a lot. How did that woman have so much power in her? She spends most of her time studying in the library, so how would she even have the extra time to go weight lifting?

"Woah woman. Watch it! This body is precious right here. Do you think you can afford to pay back for even one broken bone?" I held my hands up and crossed it against my chest, definitely not about to any type of harm to harm my golden body.

"Whatever. Golden body, my . If your body is gold, mine is pure platinum plus. Anyways, just to get things clear, I am definitely not a bookworm. I'm only studying because I need to get good grades. And I need to get good grades so I wouldn't have to pay a single cent for my tuition fees other than for buying lunch or my textbooks. Trust me. If I didn't have my grades on the line, I most definitely wouldn't be spending my time at the library."

It took a couple of seconds before everything she said was processed in my mind. You know, for someone who doesn't have too many friends, she sure does talk a mouthful. But then again, what does this have to do with her asking me out?

"Okay, so sure. If you put it that way, then no, you're most definitely not a bookworm. But again, how does that have any little thing to do with you and me potentially being in a relationship?"

"Well, we're obviously not going to be in a real relationship. We'll just treat it as if it's one, even though the feelings obviously aren't going to be there. Now, to answer your question, I just want to experience it. That's all. Now that my dog Joo died, I've just been feeling incredibly lonely. You don't know how lonely I've been. And when I was on my way to the park, I saw all these couples holding hands, kissing, hugging, and whatnot. It just made me extremely jealous."

And again, it took me a little while to process everything she said. But this time, I kind of understood what she meant. She basically doesn't want a real relationship with real feelings and real love. She just wants... a replica-- for the lack of a better word-- of the relationship. She doesn't want a real relationship, but she wants to be able to experience it. Although with that clear and over with, another question randomly popped up inside my head.

"So why can't you just get a boyfriend yourself again? Wouldn't it make more sense, to be in an actual relationship to experience those actual feelings? What's the point of doing all this work?"

"Well, that's the thing. All this work. I'm so busy with school and all. And when I start working, I'll probably be even more busy, since once this is done and over with, I'll have to become the breadwinner of the family. I just don't have the time to be in a committed relationship. I want to experience the things couples experience, without being expected to stay true to it all the time. I want to love when I have the time. Not all the time."

I think it was the pity that had me. Yes, definitely the pity. You could say that I felt sympathy for her, especially after she gave that sob-story. I mean really, I was about to tear up, and I do blame it on my family genes. All of us are just a whole bunch of softies that it's not even funny anymore. It's just horrifying because if you lock up all of the male Kims in a room, and a movie like The Notebook is playing, all you'll be seeing is a bunch of sogged up tissues lying on the floor.

So out of pity, I agreed. Without even thinking and just going for the sob-story I agreed.

And yes, I did regret the mistake.

But it was too late.

Because I was a stupid little boy that fell into the trap.

And I signed a contract that she wrote in about 5 minutes without even reading the fine print.

Now I all I'm left to do is lie down in my new room banging my head on the wall.

And sobbing over how much of an idiot I was.

Regret. Regret. Regret. Regret.

Oh, how I regret it.