“Peeing in the shower is NOT okay!”

   “I honestly don’t see the problem with it. The shower is like the cleanest place in the world. First, you pee, then, you clean the shower, then you clean your . Easy, and clean.”

   “Just hearing the procedure makes me want to puke you imbecile.”

Minhyuk shook his head as Kihyun and Hyungwon continued to bicker over whether it was okay to pee in the shower or not. Did it really matter where one liked to pee? He didn’t think so.

   “Minhyuk, settle this for us!”

Minhyuk nearly jumped out of his own skin. He looked up from his computer, to see both Kihyun and Hyungwon glaring daggers at him. I honestly feel so attacked right now…He weakly glanced at both of them, and saw that neither had any intention of backing down.

   “I have no part in this. Go settle this by yourselves.” He shrugged. How dare they interrupt Boku no Pico (I am so sorry Minhyuk but I just had to. Don't search it up, and I apologize in advance if you do.) “Just don’t tear each other apart, ‘kay?” He then grabbed the Holy Water beside him and placed a few drops into his eyes.

---

Minhyuk had ed up. If only he had settled the argument half an hour ago, then this nightmare wouldn’t be happening.

   “This isn’t just some silly argument, this is all out war.” Hyungwon rambled, pacing in circles, “I will show Kihyun that I am superior, and you are going to help me.”

Minhyuk really didn’t want to help Hyungwon antagonize Kihyun, but hey, he was the reason that this was happening. He was (not) prepared to participate in a war of pettiness that would put Hitler to shame.

   “Here is a very important news update!” Kihyun hollered, bursting into their room again. Minhyuk might have just his pants

   “D-did not!” He shrieked, his face bright red. He waddled over to the bathroom, clutching his pelvis area. Kihyun didn’t pay any attention.    

   “I have Shownu and Jooheon on my side now!” He declared, glaring up at Hyungwon (who was trying his best to hold in a snicker.) “It’s two against three, so your loss is inevitable.”

   “W-well we have, uh,” Hyungwon urgently racked his brain, thinking of the first name that came to mind, “Wonho! Yeah, Wonho.” , He grimaced, Not Wonho of all people…

   “Who’s Wonho?” Kihyun asked. Cold bullets of sweat rolled down Hyungwon’s forehead.

   “Um he’s...uh-

   “He’s our next-door neighbour that Hyungwon has a crush on!” Minhyuk shouted, peeping his head out from the bathroom. Hyungwon froze, mouth open. Kihyun didn’t try his best to hold in a snicker.

   “You better shut your mouth before I staple it shut for you!” Hyungwon screeched, his face turning bright red. By now, Kihyun was on the floor laughing. Hyungwon glared down at him. “And you. You better prepare for the worst four to seven days in your life.” Wait who decided it would span from four to seven days?

   “M-me.” Kihyun wheezed, still on the floor laughing, only to stop once Hyungwon came back from the kitchen with a butcher’s knife.

---

   “I am so sorry we dragged you into this.” Hyungwon muttered, with his head down. He and Minhyuk were sitting in Wonho’s room, trying their best to explain the situation without losing too much of their pride.

   “Nah, it’s interesting.” Wonho smirked, with a brow raised. “Think of it as payback from when we first met.”

Minhyuk and Hyungwon simultaneously sighed, as neither wanted to remember that fateful night.

   “Right, just think about it that way…” Minhyuk muttered.

   “But are you sure it’s a good idea to let me in on this?” Wonho asked. Minhyuk and Hyungwon exchanged quizzical expressions. “I have been told in the past that I really need to hold it back these things.”

   “I don’t see why not?” Hyungwon said. “And we’re up against Kihyun here and Kihyun is like the pettiest person I know.”

   “Okay if you say so.” Wonho’s face twisted into a devilish, -eating grin that made Minhyuk and Hyungwon regret their choice immediately.

   “.”

And although Hyungwon was absolutely terrified for his and Minhyuk’s fate, he had to admit, it was ing hot.

---

   “Oh hell no.”

They had just come back from classes, and Hyungwon went to use the toilet, where he found out that Kihyun had gotten the better of them. The toilet bowl was covered in duct tape. He looked to the shower, where he found out that the entire shower floor including the drain was covered in duct tape as well. He couldn’t pee if he wanted to.

   “Hyungwon move over! I need to take a -

Soon, Minhyuk joined him in staring at their bathroom. It was a good five minutes before Minhyuk spoke up again.

   “Well how the am I going to take a , now?”

   “Easy, we go to Kihyun’s room and piss in his shower. You in his toilet, though. I’m not that low.”

   “Sounds like a plan to me.”

   “Okay, let me call up Wonho.”

Minhyuk grabbed their extra key to Kihyun’s room, while Hyungwon went next door to find Wonho. The three cackled evilly, tiptoeing to Kihyun’s room, where they mixed yellow food dye with water and splashed some (a lot) in his shower.

   “The funniest part of this is that Kihyun’s going to be freaking out later over water.” Hyungwon giggled. “As I said, I’m not that low.”

   “Okay, but I have an even better idea.” Wonho suggested, going over to the cabinet where Kihyun keeps his food dye. He came back with a small bottle of red food dye. “Now he’ll really question what went down here.”

   “Wait, that’s too much! Gosh, it looks like a crime scene here.” Minhyuk snatched the bottle from Wonho’s hands. “You know what, I’ll make a bloody handprint on the wall if that’s the direction we’re heading.”

Needless to say, sometime later, an ear-splitting scream echoed throughout the entire apartment building. Hyungwon smugly grinned.

   “Okay, I get that you’re happy about your little victory, but can you please help me get this duct tape off the toilet? It’s impossible I swear there’s like fifty layers of tape here. Did he use an entire roll?”

---

Kihyun stared at his shower with wide, shaking eyes. He had just screamed for like three minutes straight, but now, he wanted to get to the bottom of this. There was a ton of yellow and red *ahem* substance pooling in his shower. It better not be blood, right? Did someone have a sudden extreme nosebleed while peeing in his shower? Or did someone pee in his shower while on their period? Did somebody die in his shower while peeing? He the water, letting everything flow into the drain. He should be grateful that he had a functioning drain, unlike Minhyuk and Hyungwon, whose drain he taped up. Wait. Minhyuk and Hyungwon? He blinked. And blinked again.

   “Kihyun, you okay? I heard someone screaming near our room, was it you?” Shownu burst through the door, obviously concerned.

   “No time for that, we are plotting REVENGE I tell you, REVENGE. By the way, what’s that bottle in your hands?”

   “Hair dye. I was planning on experimenting with your hair.”

   “Perfect.”

It was Kihyun’s turn to evilly cackle.  Not lying here, Shownu was extremely intimidated by this tiny man, despite Kihyun being like a head shorter than him.

   “Wait, you were planning on experimenting with whose hair again?”

   “M-mine.”

A/N

This will be continued in the next chapter. Spoiler: It's gonna be hell(a rad i'm so sorry) 

References: 

Boku no Pico is an anime that nobody should ever lay their precious eyes on unless they have a death wish.