Back in the world of the living...

JUNGKOOK

Car lights still zoom past my room. My clock reads 1:17am. Lately, I've been so restless. The way I've been sleeping, I shouldn't be this awake. I don't know what it is I'm trying to stay awake for. When I do manage to sleep, it's like someone dumps a bucket over me. I sweat so much, I have to change my sheets almost every day.
I shuffle to the shower, taking note on the way that Yoongi's door is slightly ajar. Our little routine runs like clockwork. I wake up in the middle of the night and shower to find he's gone. Then I leave myself. I come back before the sun is up and his door is closed. We 'wake up' and act as if we had been sleeping in bed like normal people this whole time.

He never asks about why my clothes are different from the ones I wore to bed. I never ask about the marks on his neck. Ever since Jin left two weeks ago, he's been more shut off than usual. I get it. It crushed me too but can he at least talk to me? Still, it feels wrong to say what actually happened, so when people ask what's wrong I tell them a dear friend of mine left. I never say where to or how. I let them assume and walk off before they can probe any further.

Tonight bites especially hard. I pull my hoodie over my head and amble aimlessly down the street. I don't do anything when I go out like most kids my age would try to do. I don't get drunk or get into clubs or even smoke cigarettes. Okay, maybe I snuck into a club once. But drunk women clearly older then me calling me baby weirds me out, so never again. I just walk around and watch things. Since I don't have a life of my own, I watch other peoples' lives. Even if it's the life of some hobo on the street or a group of fat guys stuffing their faces in a 24 hour diner.

If Yoongi keeps on like he usually does in the few times I had followed him, he'd make his way to some shabby motel in the city. I never see anyone walk in or out with him. At least he spends his nights inside. I always make sure to drop by that part of town in my walks.
It's not even two yet and I feel two guys tailing me. Before they can get any closer, I slip into a nearby convience store. After a few minutes, the shop owner yells at me to get out for not buying anything.  

They look like they same dudes who harrased me last time, bumping shoulders with me and asking if I wanted to make some quick money. I didn't want any business with them so I politely told them that. Then they started getting on me about thinking I'm too good for them. They underestimated me and I fought them off and ran home. Barely though, the next morning I had marks of my own.

I'm lost in my own thoughts untill I'm pulled into an alleyway and shoved against a dumpster. I know it's them so I wait. They snigger at me and one of them pats my face a few times, the last one becoming a sharp slap.

"Someone's got balls to show their face again." Pat. Pat.

"You gonna say anything, huh, buddy?" Pat... Pat... Pause... Whack!

"You need to learn some manners boy, answer me when I talk to you or else." He hauls me up to pin me against the wall but I roughly shove him off. The other guy stops laughing. Staring at them, I wonder why they're looking at me funny. A smug grin grows on the second guy as he reaches forth to pull my hoodie all the way down. They're both laughing now, quite hard actually.

"Long time no see, Golden Boy."

YOONGI

To: Jungkook
From: Yoongi
Stay home, it's cold tonight.

I stare at my phone, longer than I should when it comes to pressing one button. I decide against it. Delete, delete, delete.

To: Jungkook
From: Yoongi
_

I keep staring until my eyellids grow heavy and I'm about to chuck it on the drawer beside me when it buzzes again. Thinking it was someone else, I hurry to check.

To: Suga
From: ILYeejin
Babyyyyyyy
Recieved 2:43am

I roll my eyes. I bloody woke up for nothing. When did she change her name?

To: Yeejin
From: Suga
At home today sorry
Sent 2:52am

To: Suga
From: Yeejin
Liar I saw u walk in XD
Recieved 2:54am

To: Suga
From: Yeejin
Im in one of the rooms lol
Recieved 2:54am

To: Yeejin
From: Suga
Good take the hint
Sent 3:08am

To: Suga
From: Yeejin
Aww babe dont b lyk dat
Recieved 3:12am

To: Yeejin
From: Suga
LEAVE ME ALONE
Sent 3:15am

I switch my phone off and chuck it away for real. I don't even know why I do this. She's just a bit effed up because of her ex. I happened to be in the bar she was wasted in and then boom, booty call. I was just as ty as she was so I took advantage. Safe to say I'm not proud.

On the night I tried to make right and break it off, she became pitiful and started crying against the door saying she just needs to forget and all that. I know we don't love each other just help me out. I acted like I didn't hear that first bit and just let her in. And that's what happens when she comes. I always make sure to get a little drunk beforehand so it's easier for me to stand her. She talks while I drink. I barely listen while she puts the takeout she comes with on plates. Then I let her kiss me, I never kiss back so she settles for my neck. I stop her before she gets too far. I get disgusted with her when she protests, but all I do about it is ask her to leave.  I don't care what time it is, because from what I see she's perfectly capable. An -ish thing of me to think but I let myself have that because hey, I'm effed up, too.

Something's poking my back as I shift in bed. Holding it up to the window, an old silver glint casts a spot of light against the walls and I know what it is. I stopped smoking ages ago - Jungkook kept breaking my smokes and I got sick of the wasted money.

I flick the lighter on and off, on and off. Too much of nothing going on in my head right now, I don't even make any ing sense. I turn to face the window and dawn is begining to peek through, the neon sign beside it already turned off. Jungkook should be home by now so I hustle to get home.

It's almost midday and he's not back.