I Hate... Everything

Mr. Wu's eyes opened wide and he uttered a groan as one of the young men stepped up behind him and brought a heavy pipe down on his head.

GuiGui screamed. And screamed again.

Her father's eyes rolled up in his head, and he slumped to the floor as if in slow motion, landing first on his knees, then toppling face forward onto the linoleum.

He didn't move.

GuiGui's hands went up to her face, gripped her hair, and tugged. She tried to scream again, but no sound came out. "Dad---" she finally managed to cry. "Dad---"

The tall young man with dark hair slammed his fist hard against the front of the cash register when he saw it was empty. "Let's get out of here!" he shouted to his friends.

"Dad---" GuiGui cried, staring down at her unmoving father, facedown on the floor, his arms folded under his body.

"Is he dead?" the one who hit him asked, dropping the section of pipe to the floor.

"You want to stick around to find out?" the dark haired one snapped.

All three of them were laughing as they ran out the front door. GuiGui watched them through the window as they disappeared around the corner.

She realized she was still tugging at her hair. Forcing her hands down, she dropped to the floor beside her father. "Dad---? Dad---?"

He didn't respond. She gasped as she saw bright red blood coming from the crown of his head.

"Dad---?"

She rolled him over on his back.

Please be alive. Please be alive. Please be alive.

His eyes were closed. He was breathing slowly, noisily through his mouth. Each breath sounded like a groan.

Relieved that he was still alive, but alarmed by the dark blood under his head, GuiGui pulled herself to her feet, ran to the phone in the kitchen, and dialled 911.

Two hours later GuiGui was home alone, pacing the living-room floor, her sneakers squeaking, her arms crossed over her chest. The floor squeaks as she walked over them. The sound of the grandfathers clock seemed to grow louder with each tick.

Calm down, GuiGui, she told herself. Calm down. Calm down.

She repeated the words in her mind until they no longer made sense.

Everything's going to be okay, she thought.

Her father was in the intensive care unit of Taipei General Hospital. The doctor told her he was in "serious but stable" condition.

She was too frightened and yet too relieved to ask what that meant.

Serious but stable.

Those words sounded better than dead.

"We don't detect any internal bleeding," the doctor told her. "Your father was lucky."

Lucky? How was he lucky? GuiGui was about to say.

But she restrained herself, held in her bitterness, forced a smile, and muttered some kind of polite answer.

Her mother had arrived at the hospital a few minutes later in her white uniform. She was pale and very frightened. The redheaded doctor had led her down the long, green-painted corridor, his hand on her shoulder, talking softly to her.

Now it was nearly ten o' clock, and Mrs. Wu was still at the hospital. From there she'd probably go back to work.

GuiGui was alone. Pacing the living room. The floor creaked eerily beneath her as if crying out from every step she took.

I hate this creepy old house, she thought, dropping into the worn corduroy armchair in the corner.

I hate this house. I hate town.

I hate... everything.

Her anger couldn't chase away her fear.

The feeling of panic crept up on her, as if someone were pulling a heavy blanket over her, tightening it around her, smothering her under it.

What if Dad dies?

What will happen to us then?

Stop it, GuiGui, she scolded herself.

Stop it--- right now.

She looked down and realized she had the phone in her hand. Without thinking, she dialled Hebe's number.

The phone rang three times. Hebe answered. "Hello?"

"Hebe, it's me--- GuiGui."

"Oh, hi. How are you doing? Chun and I were just---"

"Hebe, something terrible happened," GuiGui interrupted impatiently, feeling the panic, feeling chilled all over, feeling her heart pound. "The restaurant was robbed. They hit my dad over the head."

"Oh, that's terrible!" Hebe exclaimed. "Is he okay?" GuiGui could hear Chun in the background, asking what was going on.

"I'm not really sure. He's in intensive care. They say he's stable. My mom's at the hospital. I'm all alone here," GuiGui said, staring at the clock. "Could you do me a favor, Hebe? Could you come and stay here tonight?"

"Sure. No problem," Hebe said quickly. "I think it'll be okay. Let me ask my mom."

GuiGui heard the phone being put down, heard voices in the background but couldn't understand their words. Still staring at the clock, she waited and tapped her fingers on the arm of the chair.

"Be right over," Hebe said.

"Thanks," GuiGui replied gratefully and hung up.

A few minutes later GuiGui saw car headlights in the driveway. She eagerly pulled open the front door and the porch light.

This is really nice of Hebe, GuiGui thought, peering out at the driveway through the storm door. She's a true friend.

Then she saw that Chun had come too.

Hebe stepped into the hallway accompanied by a burst of cold air. She threw her arms around GuiGui,startling her, and gave her a hug. "Are you okay? You must have been so frightened!"

"Yes. I---" GuiGui suddenly couldn't find the words.

Chun pushed his way past them, rubbing his hands. "It got so cold," he said peering curiously into the living room.

"I'll make some hot chocolate," GuiGui offered.

"Coffee would be better," he said, tossing his jacket down onto the floor in front of the couch.

"Okay. Coffee," GuiGui replied.

Chun and Hebe followed her into the kitchen. "I'll make instant, ok?"

"Let me do it," Hebe insisted. "You poor thing. Look--- your hands are shaking."

"It--- it was really scary," GuiGui admitted, stepping back and letting Hebe fill the kettle. "I thought Dad was--- I mean, there was so much blood."

"Who were these guys?" Chun asked, resting his body onto a tall kitchen stool and leaning forward to rest his elbows on the counter.

"I don't know," GuiGui replied. "I never saw them before. They were all wearing denim jackets. Tough looking. Sort of like a gang."

"My dad says there's an awful lot of crime in the Old Village," Hebe said thoughtfully.

"Is your dad going to be okay?" Chun asked.

I think so," GuiGui said, suddenly afraid again, barely able to choke out the words.

A few minutes later they were back in the living room, the TV on, rapid-fire images of an MTV video filling the room with color. GuiGui sat in the armchair in the corner, her legs tucked under her, the coffee mug between her hands. Hebe and Chun were on the couch.

GuiGui turned her eyes from the TV and saw Chun pull Hebe close to him. She raised her face to his, and they kissed, a long, lingering kiss.

That's why Hebe was so eager to leave home and come over here, GuiGui thought bitterly. So she and Chun would have a place to make out.

The two of them kissed again, as if they were alone in their own world, as if GuiGui weren't in the room.

She tried to watch the images of the music video, but her eyes kept returning to Hebe and Chun.

Watching them, she felt even more alone than before.

Why isn't that me with a guy on the couch? she asked herself. Why do I have to be the one by myself in the corner?

I'm so tired of being lonely, she thought.

I'm so tired of never going out, of never being with a boy, of never having a boy care about me.

Then she thought, If that tough-looking boy who came into the restaurant--- Aaron Yan--- yeah, if YaLun comes back and asks me out, I'll say yes. I won't hesitate for a second.

GuiGui closed her eyes.

She pictured her father being hit over the head again. She pictured the surprise on his face, the way his eyes rolled back in his head, the way he slumped to his knees, then fell forward. She pictured the blood running from the top of his head.

A frightening thought flashed into her mind just then. A thought about YaLun.

He had left so suddenly. Without even eating his hamburger.

He left as soon as he saw GuiGui's father.

As soon as he saw that GuiGui and her father were the only ones working in the restaurant.

What if YaLun was sent ahead to check out the place for the other three guys?

That would explain why he hurried out so quickly. And why the kids had appeared a short while later.

It can't be possible--- can it? GuiGui asked herself.

Well, if he is one of them, he'll never come back.

He knows if he comes back, he could be caught.

Her mind spun faster than the images of the MTV video. She suddenly felt as if her brain were about to burst. She shut her eyes tight, the sound of the video clinging in he ears.

What if he does come back?

What will I do?