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           None of them knew who led the other here. Maybe it was a mutual decision based on their own consciences. Sena’s footsteps were particularly heavy, not that she hadn’t expected Jongin to find her so quickly after she regained consciousness. Sadness was particularly overwhelming on that day, and it was not just him, it was Sehun, but she could not deny that it was Jongin that brought that heart-wrenching feeling she could not shake off.

            “You don’t seem too happy to see me here, Sena,” he said and she flinched – a gesture that did not go unnoticed by his keen eyes. The way he called her – Sena – without the usual teasing tone or weird nicknames still affected her so. It started off bitter, very very bitter, as she clenched her fists tightly to prevent anymore slip of emotion that would display her weakness, even if that was only momentary.     

            Weeks ago Sena would have at least been happy with his presence – to finally welcome him back to the headquarter, because no matter what happened two years ago, deep inside her heart, she still wished him back. It was so terrible and consuming, the kind of love they had for each other. Tiring and so powerful, yet in the end, it overwhelmed, conquering her heart and destroyed it all at once. No one would know how painful it could be for someone you loved so much to break you so entirely. Without guilt. Or did he –?

            “I don’t see a reason to be happy,” She replied, trying to sound nonchalant. Sena’s turquoise eyes looked different, filled with disappointment and hatred, and beneath it all, pieces of her shattered heart. Jongin in a deep breath, and he tried his best not to break down when he looked at her eyes. It did not matter how much she had changed for all the time he was not here, because what mattered was her heart had changed ever since.

            “Will you… Will you please explain to me what has happened?” It wasn’t her teary eyes that got him – though Jongin knew Sena hated others to see her cry. He decided turning around would be best, for he wanted to respect her wish, something he did often without others knowing. It was the way she pleaded, the way she said her ‘please’ that ultimately broke his own heart, having suffered long enough to this day.

            It was probably the one thing that would differentiate him most to Sehun. He knew Sehun cared for others, knew it was in his heart to make others happy even if it meant sacrificing bits of his own. Jongin, however, knew that while there was light to that, there should be a darkness that would keep the light shining. And so he decided to be that kind of despicable person. After all, he had nothing else to lose. He had lost everything long ago. All he ever wanted was the best for everyone. And all the while, he would kill of his own hope for redemption.

            Until Sena.

            Two years ago, Kim Jongin knew the Seiryuu heiress was fighting a battle she could not win. She might command the clan – but only on the surface. Many of the high-ranked officials had long been bought over by her Grandfather. He had his claws on his granddaughter as he had an iron grip over his clan. On paper and the media, he was declared dead, but many knew he was still very much alive, only waiting to strike down the main core of Seiryuu’s power before he could take it back.

            He wished for immortality, much like many others out there. At first it started off as a fascination during his youth in Suzakku. His desire to rule the clan was obvious, even though he was born the eldest – a pity for someone so passionate to rule. After a two-years fight to the Suzakku crown, his youngest brother had it in the end. He lost shamefully and went back to his homeland to recover.

            In Seoul, South Korea, Yoon Sang Hyun met the love of his life – or so it seemed to the rest of the world. Eun Hye was a very beautiful woman, even more beautiful than the other Seiryuu leaders before her. Sang Hyun was first enchanted by her appearance, and second, by her status. Then and there, he saw a redemption to his loss. He needed to have her. If he could have her, he would have the entire Seiryuu at his will. Even though the clan was not as big as his Suzakku, it would still suffice for they were one vicious clan, strong in offence and defence and held at least third of the world’s economy in their hands. 

            He might have loved her at first. Sang Hyun remembered he did. Their honeymoon period was so blissful. Until he found the book passed down only to clan leaders of Seiryuu. Inside was a detailed journal from one of their first leaders, telling on the effect of the blessed – or cursed as he would write on that forsaken book – bloodline of the four Gods. These shells bear incredibly powerful blood, giving immortality to a befitting owner.

            Sang Hyun was a calculative man. He wouldn’t let this chance slip by. He pictured himself ruling the clan forever, taking over others until the world slowly fell onto his grasp. The chance was too tempting. Not long after their blissful marriage, Eun Hye passed away. Her body never to be found again. Her blood was powerful, but not enough to stop his signs of aging and death. He was scared to see wrinkles on his face when he turned sixty – when he’d slowed down his intake of blood when it was scarce. One victim led to another. He assumed Sena would be the last because she was a direct descendant from the main line. Her father had been picked carefully by Sang Hyun to wed his one and only daughter. She was the result of that loveless marriage.

            Of all the people who knew and understood Sang Hyun best, there was Jongin and Sehun – selectively decided very early on to be the protectors of Sena. His methods of training them, albeit very cruel and inhumane, was to plant them as spies by her side, so that when the time came, he would exploit her to his heart’s content. They were not selected solely for their abilities, though they possessed astonishing talents since youth, but for their looks and their charms – the ability to attract others like honey to bees.

            At the tender age of ten, Kim Jongin and Oh Sehun learnt the truth.

            And at that age, they both had a mutual agreement regarding this.

            It was extremely rare for both protectors to agree on something, because their personalities clashed and there was this barrier that seemed to keep them apart from associating further, though on the battle field, they were invincible together. On the paper, they were the most compatible pairing of all talents, but they never got along well. This secret agreement between them was only the first to many more.

            Jongin hated that old man. There was no one he hated more than him. He vowed to destroy his family and all of his beloveds. Unlike Sehun, he had a perfect family before it was destroyed under the cold regime of Grandfather’s. All his vow became void when he met one little girl on that raining day outside the Japanese compound. She was shivering badly, her eyes dropped halfway and her lips parted.

            Yoon Sena looked almost too innocent for someone who was destined to bear the burden of fifteen thousand people. She was just a little girl – Jongin screamed in his mind – he could not kill her. She reminded him of what he was, of what he could have been. She was so happy, so carefree, and too ignorant for Jongin’s liking. Spoilt and sheltered all her life, she would not know what it was like living without the comfort she had always had.

            He did not like her. At all. And it was not because she was her Grandfather’s bloodline, but because she was far too ignorant. Jongin didn’t like that big-toothy grin plastered on her face when she took notice of him. He had shrugged her away and told her off harshly. It was the start to her dislike for him for years, not that he would mind. Sehun was different, though – Jongin could tell from his soft gazes and affectionate smiles whenever he spoke of her. He didn’t form an immediate attachment to her. But one thing he was very sure of: he could not and would not kill her. 

            They started planning when they were fourteen, much more mature to understand. It was also by mutual decision that Jongin decided he should be the sacrifice. It did not matter. He didn’t like her much anyway. It shouldn’t matter whether or not her heart would be broken by him. Sehun was just as sure. Sena would eventually move on. People did. They couldn’t be stuck forever. And besides, she would have Sehun by her side. There wouldn’t be much problem.

            Jongin did not, for once, question his own charm, because he knew there were countless girls whose heart had been broken by his apathy. He didn’t think, not ever, that he would fall in love, because the thought itself was ridiculous. How could he give his heart to another if it was long lost and gone? He had confidence in himself. Yoon Sena must fall for him, that would mark the start of their plan. She must believe that he would betray her. She must be devastated, angry. That was what they thought.

            The eighteen-year old Sena was just as ignorant as the nine year-old her. He played with her at his own will. He treated her hot and cold at times, because he knew it would get her interested. He loved watching her angry face when she was provoked, loved watching her smile with the brilliant flash in her chocolate brown eyes. He loved watching the sunset with her. He loved spending time, even just for a bit, brushing her hair against his hands. He loved holding her close. He loved watching the flush on her face, knowing the effect he had on her. The key point, though: he still loves it.

            Jongin clearly remembered that new year in 2016, when everything became a turning point for everyone involved. For Grandfather’s downfall, Sena’s change, Sehun’s plan and Jongin’s betrayal. He decided not to have his emotions at play, because if he did, he wouldn’t be able to leave. He was already at the crossroad. He couldn’t return anymore. He remembered her look when his shot missed and hit her chest. How could he? It wasn’t pain, wasn’t sadness or disappointment.

            Her face showed nothing but contentment, as if she was happy to go. Her eyes closed, and Jongin swore he almost went insane with rage. It didn’t matter the kind of punishment afterwards: no matter what scars or wounds Sang Hyun would give, it would not quell the anguish in his heart. It never would. It was only days later when Sehun informed him angrily that Sena was still alive that he was able to function again.

            In those two years, he had gotten used to battling his own demons. The nightmares he had were no longer of the old man’s torture, but those chocolate brown eyes that stared deep into his eyes, begging for death. He would never succumb, though. He needed to live on until the day that old man was murdered. Then he could rest in peace knowing that his job was well done. In exchange for the freedom he could have gotten, he chose to protect her instead.

            Not because of the vow he made to protect her long before.

            But because he loves her.

            And love could do things Kim Jongin thought he never would.