---

[-]

 

  Every step felt like a million tons. 

 

  Every step he took away from the ward felt like he's walking on hot, burning coal. Jiyong's throat was strangled, and his head was deprived of breath. Her tears stained his sleeve, and everytime he felt it touch his skin, it pierced him. 

 

  Then his ears picked up her weeping as she broke down in the room, her heartbroken cries echoing throughout the entire coridoor, splitting his chest into pieces. Her wailing almost halted him in his steps. Almost sent him running back into the room and crushing her in his arms. But it took him all of his willpower to keep walking, distancing himself away from her cries of despair. His fingernails are digging so deep into his hand that his skin tore and bled. He never heard her cry like this before, and he knows he broke her more than that crash ever did. 

 

  But he has to save her from being broken for even more times.

 

  He heard her best friend running into the room behind him and he heard her calling out to him angrily, but he walked on like a robot, ignoring everyone and everything along his way. He is in so much pain that his face was ashen. He regretted it. He shouldn't have used the words he used. He purposely chose the nastiest words that he could think of because he was selfish. He's scared that when she started to beg for him to stay, he would relent and he would give in. So he didn't want to let her beg at all.

 

  He destroyed her and it killed him.

 

  Jiyong ripped open the door of the fire stairways and numbly descended it. One flight, two flights, three flights. Her desolated sobs were by his ears, haunting him. The way she calls out to him, her voice full of pain, her eyes reflecting her shock at his betrayal crushed his chest, and his strength finally gave way as he slid down to sit on the steps.

 

  She said she loves him.

 

  . Why did everything has to come down to this? What in the world would he not trade to be able to say those words back to her? 

 

  But he can't. He's bad for her. He's a disaster. Someone like her shouldn't love someone like him. He ing hates how she looks at him with her eyes full of tears, silently pleading for him to say the words back. He hates himself. The aching in his chest was worst than any bullet he has taken. It robbed him of his breath and he couldn't stop thinking that stabbing him literally would have been a less painful death that it is for him now.

 

  He died when the first tear fell from her eyes. Now he's dying all over again. It's a torture that'll never end.

 

  The nurses and doctors are rushing into Dara's ward upstairs, unable to understand her sudden hysteria. They injected her forcefully with doses of tranquilisers, and slowly, she began to calm down, her eyelids growing heavier as her sobs are silenced by the last remaining tears that hung on her lashes.

 

  And as she slowly drifted off to unconsciousness, a quiet, low sobbing could be heard from the stairway.

 

---

[-]

 

  Three pairs of polished, leather shoes walked into a dimly lit lift. Seungri scrunched up his nose at the odour in it. Every part of this old apartment complex smells like grim and foul. Beside him, Seunghyun has ignited a cigeratte and was now dragging on it, his gaze flickering lazily past the dirty and faded 'No Smoking' sign pinned in the lift. Just as Youngbae jabbed on the close button, a hand slammed onto the opening between the two doors, forcing the lift open as a sweaty looking man crinckled an embarrased smile at the occupants before squeezing into the empty spot.

 

  The young man who had just managed to catch his breath suddenly realised that the button to the fourth floor was pressed. Slightly perplexed since his home is the only apartment on the fourth floor, he stole a peek at the men around him, all dressed in black suits and donning sunglasses. A clammy feeling rose in his throat without any reason and he knew these people are probably not here for a cup of tea. Whoever they are, his mind is screaming danger.

 

  With a ding the doors of the lift opened and he immediately stepped out and began brisk walking towards his apartment. The gangster-looking guys appears to be looking around the other two empty corridoors. He could hear the sound of their shoes getting louder as they approached him. , he just needs to open the damn door now.. Why are his keys shaking? 

 

  The door unlocked with a click and relief had barely flooded him when Daesung who had walked up the stairs reached out from behind him and placed his hand on the floor, giving the man a jump scare. The other three untouchables caught up to him with leisure steps and their hands tucked in their pockets.

 

  "What...what do you want?" The man asked, his voice trembling. Behind him, his wife at home rushed up to the open door and clung onto her husband's arm protectively.

 

  Youngbae glanced calmly at the shabby living quaters in the house before turning his gaze back to the scared couple. "I heard you witnessed an accident last week, and was the one who called an ambulance."

 

  The couple visibly paled as the woman looked at her man with terrified eyes. These people can't be the same people as those who were dressed in white that night can they?

 

  "Nobody's going to hurt you if you make this quick. Did you see anything that night? Why is there no driver in the red Nissan sports car?" Daesung asked in a quiet voice.

 

  "We don't know anything!" The young man protested, taking a step back. "We saw a Mercedes speeding like crazy... like it was out of control... the driver is probably drunk... and then when it reached the crossroad, the red Nissan sports car appeared from the other road and just rammed right into the Merz."

 

  "Go on."

 

  "We- we wanted to help but..." The woman continued meekly. "another car pulled over beside the crash, a black one... and they pulled the driver from the red car out and left with him."

 

  The four Untouchables looked at each other before pressing. "What model was the car?"

 

  "It's too dark and we're too faraway to see.. But the people who got out from it were all wearing white suits and masks." The husband spilled everything he knew, cowering from the four guys. He caught a glimpse of a piece of metal in one of their blazers that looked horribly like a handgun. "Please don't hurt us!"

  

  Youngbae straightened up as Seunghyun casted him a knowing look. White men with masks. The Immortal Angels.

 

  "And you called the ambulance?" 

 

  The couple nodded. 

 

  Seungri reached out and dropped a suitcase flatly infront of the two, who shrieked and jumped back. The Untouchables turned for the lift, and only when the couple warily watched the four descended from their floor that they shakily turned their gaze to the suspicious, silver luggage lying by their feet. Gulping, the man bent down and clicked it open while his wife held onto his arm nervously.

 

  In it was a hundred million won in cash. 

 

 

---

 

    "Whoa, we were right, it was them." Daesung breathed, narrowing his eyes in anger. They'll make sure the I.A suffers a horrible deal before they kill them for doing this to their boss and Dara. "Jiyong hyung should've been here to hear this."

  

  "Jiyong hyung has been at the same place for days already... He's either there or at home drinking himself unconscious." Maknae sighed tiredly, leaning on the wall of the lift.

  

  Beside him, Seunghyun's gaze darkened. When they reached the ground level, he's the first to walked out of the elevator in big strides. Youngbae called out to him, but ignoring him, he flagged down a cab that arrived timely and sped off. 

 

---

[DARA]

 

  I looked around the dark store to make sure every light and aircon have been off beside pulling the glass doors towards me. Bending down, I tightened the lock at the bottom of the front doors. Another day of work has ended. I'm always the one pulling the night shift nowadays. Ever since I got out of the hospital, staying at home feels like a torture more than working does. 

 

  "Dinner?" 

 

  A familiar voice rang out behind me and I knew who it is before I even turned around. True enough, as he had done for the past few nights, Donghae was there under the street lamp outside the boutique, waiting for me. 

 

  "Ofcourse." I smiled at him and he returned a boyish grin. It'd be a lie to say that I'm not famished. The night air is a little chilly, and I glanced towards the empty street out of habit. I'm not expecting to see that black Mercedes, but it had became a ritual for me. This didn't escape Donghae's eyes and he immediately nudged me along as he began to complain about Bom's habit of singing in the shower and the lousy wall between their flats which wasn't sound proof at all.

 

  My days have been normal. I went on with life even though I thought I couldn't. I thought I would be different but I am in the end, still me. After the initial sadness everything went back to being normal except that it feels like some part of it is now empty and missing, and it shrinks in the day to become almost unnoticable. But during the night the gap becomes jarring. And those were the terrorising nights. I have grieved and I have cried my fair share, but all of these eventually gave way to a shear of nothingness that somehow takes over and holds my soul. It has been three long weeks, and I am lost in time. 

 

  I tried to find Jiyong, but he must've tried real hard to make himself invisible. I went everywhere that I knew is associated with the Mafia. I went to Hardrock Bar and the casino... I even went to the HQ despite knowing that I'd be stopped before I could take a step in. But he completely vanished. Nobody knows where he is. I wished I could've said that there's nothing that I could do but that wouldn't be true. I did everything, but so did he. He gave his all to make sure that I couldn't find him. 

 

  "Lets go to a place I know at Incheon that has really good burgers." Donghae suggested cheerily, stopping in the midst of his complains. I scrunched up my nose.

 

  "That's way too far. We can just eat around here." I glanced around, my eyes landing on a beef soup restaurant by the street. "That one looks good."

  

  "Come on." Donghae persuaded. Somehow, he's been trying to eat food at far places these few days. 

 

  "I'm tired, and I can't wait to go back and take a shower and-" I invented, but he slumped his shoulders and looked wearily at me.

  

  "And weep the whole night?"

 

  I fell silent for a split second before breaking out into a laugh, rolling my eyes at him. Ridiculous. 

  

  "I'm going in if you're not." I declared, but he was still staring at me with a deadpan expression. "Are you really not going to follow me?" I raised my brows at him. "Psh, fine." 

 

  I was about to turn around and cross the street when he grabbed my hand, stunning me. 

 

  "Dara, wait." He called out. I blinked at him, and he sighed.

 

  "Stop being in pain, Dara. It's long enough. What if.. just what if.. I can make you happy again?"

 

  "Donghae..." I began, a burning sensation gripping my chest.

  

  "It doesn't always have to be him, Dara. He's gone. You have to let him go." He said in a frustrated voice as tears started to well up in my eyes. 

 

  Before I could respond, a cab pulled over outside our boutique a little distance behind us. From it a figure emerged. My jaw dropped in surprise when I realised who it was. Seunghyun. I haven't seen him nor the rest of them in so long. What is he doing here?

 

  Seunghyun marched straight for the my boutique before his vision fell on me and Donghae standing a distance away, silently staring at him. He halted in his steps and changed his direction , coming straight for us. Upon reaching me, Seunghyun grabbed my wrist with a dark expression and gave me a gentle pull, signalling for me to go along with him. 

 

  "What the hell are you doing?" Donghae demanded, stepping forward to block Seunghyun's path. What on earth is happening?

 

  "Seunghyun, what's going on?" I asked in confusion. He turned around and looked at me.

  

  "Stop Jiyong before he kills someone or let someone kill him." His said plainly in his deep voice as he released his grip from my wrist.

 

  An icy feeling seized me as my lips parted at the words he said. He knows where Jiyong is. 

 

  "HEY!" Donghae cursed Seunghyun, who stopped again, before jabbing his arm in front of me. "Don't go, Dara." Donghae said forcefully, his voice almost pleading. "You don't have to."

 

  But my feet were moving on their own accord. 

 

  "Don't worry, I'll be back safe!" I called back, biting on my lips as I caught the pained expression that flashed past his face. 

 

  And as Seunghyun guided me back into the waiting cab, I heard a string of curses escape from Donghae's lips.

 

  I stole a glimpse of Seunghyun and he was staring out of the window silently. The streets flashed by and I have no idea where we are headed for. Every now and then Seunghyun's phone would start ringing, and each time he would reject the call before he eventually turned his phone off. He wanted me to stop Jiyong... but what did he mean by that? Is he in trouble again?

 

  The cab finally pulled over in a district that's outside of Itaewon and we hopped off. Neon signs dotted the entire long street with pubs and clubs lining them. The dull boom of music can be heard from beyond the closed doors. Seunghyun explained nothing as he pulled me away from the hustling night street and into a small alley. He seems to know his way around here well, navigating easily through the confined spaces. In the end, we reached a pair of metal doors in the middle of nowhere. The entire stretch of alley is deserted, with trash cans planted here and there. Without any hesitation, Seunghyun pulled the metal doors open and I followed him in, not knowing what to expect. We walked down an eerily silent stretch of dimly lit hallway until we reached another pair of doors.

 

  Seunghyun opened them and I couldn't believe where I was. It was like an entire new world is behind those doors. The first thing that flooded my senses was the loud noise and the sheer number of people packed in them. There were all sorts of people, scary looking ones, those who're heavily tattooed... all sorts. The entire place is illuminated by an old but huge yellowish light from the ceiling. My mouth was hanging open as I stepped in, unable to believe my eyes. This is an underground fighting den. And it isn't even discovered by the police yet?

 

  In the centre of the room is an arena that is seperated from the spectators with tall, metal bars, looking almost like a cage. A bookie stands by its gates with a cigeratte hanging loosely in between his lips, counting the bills as the bystanders slam down their bets on the small table. Absolutely horrified, I turned my gaze to Seunghyun, who had a defeated look on his face before he tilted his chin slightly towards the arena, sending my heart to my throat. Oh no.

 

  I turned my shaky gaze to the space and my chest instantly went cold. Jiyong was in there, wearing nothing but a loose pair of jeans and a white t-shirt that is now smeared with blood and grim. There is a bruise on the corner of his lips and a cut on his cheek. His eyes were blank, shut off and his hair was messily covering his forehead. The audience around me exploded into cheers as Jiyong's burly opponent charged towards him only to be deflected easily as Jiyong side stepped out of the way before yanking the man back by his collar and then flinging his body towards the metal bars. 

 

  Nausea swirled unrestrained in my empty stomach as I stare at the savagery in front of me with horror. Why is he being like this? Why is he descending back to this kind of barbarity? I don't get it, he doesn't have to anymore, he's the Underboss of the mafia, for god's sake!

 

  The burly man got back on his feet behind Jiyong and pounced on his unaware back, sending them both crashing towards the ground. My shriek of shock is silenced by the waves of cheers and jeers from the crowd around us. Jiyong groaned as fresh blood started to ooze from his nose, but a deformed smile tugged at his lips, almost as if he's enjoying the pain inflicted on his body. A sharp stab of pang filled my chest, making it hard for me to breath as I turned to Seunghyun with tears of panic already welling in my eyes. 

 

  "Why aren't you stopping him?" I screamed anxiously. I can't bear to look at Jiyong anymore. Seeing him mangling himself up like this hurts too much. 

 

  "We tried and we failed." Seunghyun answered.

 

  I squeezed my way to the front of the crowd, my heart pounding painfully against my ribcage, until I reached the metal bars. 

 

  "Jiyong!" I yelled. My voice was drowned out by the roaring, excited crowd.

 

  "JIYONG!" I tried again before I yelped and staggered back as Jiyong was slammed hard on the ground only inches away from the bars in front of me. 

 

  He groaned, the same satisfied smirk flashing past his face as he shook his head to clear his vision. As he heaved himself up, our eyes met, and he froze.

 

  My voice was caught in my throat and seeing his bloodied face this up close is strangling beyond words. Tears of anger, anxiety, heartache and disappointment were flowing unchecked from my eyes as I looked at him with a terrified expression.

 

  A brief look at shock shattered that emotionless look in his eyes as his lips parted at the sight of me. His opponent charged at him again and I cried out in warning but he seemed to have expected it. Snapping back to his senses, he dodged swiftly and kicked his rival in the jaw, knocking him out. The entire place burst into cheers and the bookie declares Jiyong's fifth consecutive win, but with his eyes on me, he yanked his arm free from the host and stormed straight out of the arena and towards me before pulling my hand that I held over my mouth down. 

 

  Jiyong tugged me so quickly and assertively out into the alley that it left an angry burn mark on my wrist. He slammed the metal doors shut behind us before it reopened less than a second later as Seunghyun followed us out.

 

  "What the ..." Jiyong breathed heavily, running a hand through his hair as he paced up and down in attempt to control his rage. I took a terrified step back, my hand grasping on my painful wrist. His eyes fell on Seunghyun.

 

  "Did you bring her here?" Jiyong yelled, grabbing Seunghyun by the collar. He was about to punch him when Daesung, Seungri and Youngbae came running up to separate them by force.

 

  "Lets leave them alone, hyung!" Seungri said hastily, pulling Seunghyun away with them and Daesung casted me a worried glance. I looked at Jiyong with disbelief as he snapped and punched the wall.

  

  "What's wrong with you?" I whispered when the rest has completely disappeared. Waves and waves of pain crushed my chest, charring my insides. 

 

  "This isn't a place that you should be at, Park." Jiyong muttered dully, turning to return into the fight compound but I blocked his way. He's still thinking of going back in there?

 

  "Why are you doing this?" I yelled, my eyes shaky. 

 

  "Go home."

 

  "Jiyong!"

 

  "Stop it!" He raised his voice, making me flinch. "Stop resisting, Park. Stop barging back into my life. Stop making this harder for me. Stop fighting. We got it all wrong, I was never the one you should be fighting so hard for. Don't you get it?"

 

  Every syllabus he said cut through my brain and each of them left behind a long, bleeding scar.

  

  "You're hurting me, Jiyong." My voice cracks with agony. "I know you think I'll always be in danger with you but I'm willing to stay. I have always been willing to stay for you, Jiyong. But I hate your guts, Ji. I really do." 

 

  A drop of tear rolls down my eye and he rubbed his face in exhaustion. But I went on.

 

  "I love you. I've never had someone who is such an important part of my life. You're trying to keep my world safe but without you my entire world is taken right out of my fingers. I can't handle being without you, Jiyong. I'm so madly in love with you." I paused, the pain getting too much. "But this isn't going to work. Nothing works one way, Jiyong. I can't always be the one begging for you to stay. I can't always be the only one that's fighting for us. All I want is for you to tell me you love me back, but looks like that's just too damn hard for you."

 

  My voice is hitching up in spite and bitterness now. Jiyong has lifted his head to look at me, his eyes mirroring my pain.

 

  "I'm tired, Jiyong. I don't want to fight anymore. Do as you please, wreck yourself, destroy the ones who care about you. I don't have the power to control you. I thought I did, but I'm too naive, aren't I? All these weeks after you left me I've been seeking you, trying to make things right again, but here you are, doing nothing to save us. You don't love me as much as I love you. I've realised that today. I've realised that now."

 

  Jiyong squinted and looked away as I swallowed and wiped away the tears on my cheek. My heart has bled dry, and I took a last, long look at his torn face. Time stood still as the last bit of my world crumbled and turned into ashes. I have to let go the man I love so deeply.

 

  "Goodbye, Jiyong." I whispered hoarsely. "I'll never come back for you again."

 

 

---

 

 

 

 

Another week of heartbreak!!

And ahh, I saw many people leaving me feedbacks
about how mean I am to you guys on Valentine's Day hur hur. 
I'm sorry babies!

 

Annnnd, I do go on twitter a fair bit so if you guys happen to be talking about
this fic, do hastag #gangsofitaewon neh?

 

See you guys next week! Feed me your comments below!