[CONTENTID1] 날 잡아줘 [/CONTENTID1]

[CONTENTID2]
It had been exactly three weeks. One week of a misunderstanding and two weeks of breaking up. It almost a month and the fourth week (which is this week) are the school sports day. I started to wonder can I even win when there is no one to hug me saying that I did good? Can I even run without any words of encouragement from my love ones? Can I even attend that sport day when I knew I had to face my ex-boyfriend? Even though knowing how much it hurts, I still wanted to at least see his face. Most of my classmates told me that I look cold again, making them felt uncomfortable being around me and I do admit, yes I turned into a lifeless stone –thanks to the guy named Jeon Jungkook.

Jungkook started to walk whenever he is going to school or going back home, not wanting to even face me I guess, he stopped using the bus. The driver seems to caught what happen because whenever I ride the bus, he would give me a small smile indicating that it's okay. Jimin don't talk to me as much as he did in the past weeks, maybe because Jungkook always have some plans for him, taking me away from the one who always gave me advice about Jungkook himself.

But I felt like I am not my usual old self, I started to think deeply about why did everything happen so fast. Like a bolt out of the blue. Where do I lack to treat him right? What do I need to do so he knows that my love for him is true? What should I do to gain his trust back? What should I do if Taehyung suddenly came out of nowhere and ask me out? There are so many questions lingering in my mind, but no answers had been obtained. I wanted to know what should I do, but it's hard when the honest Jungkook doesn't tell me what to do. He was quiet all these times; no text, no calls, no teasing, no kiss and hug, no his cute side, no protective Jungkook, no jealousy Jungkook, no nothing. All this thing made me broke. I felt vulnerable, useless, insecure by everything.

I am in no place to call him saying that I want him back, as much as I wanted to, I have no courage left when he told me that he felt like he is the only one who's putting effort in our relationship. I sighed hearing my best friend lecturing over the phone –almost one hour, telling me how stupid I am. 

"When will you shut your mouth, Wendy?" I groaned and I knew that she rolled her eyes as she said, "I'm telling you that you just need to tell the truth about what you feel about him. Tell him what you are always curious about and why you can't tell him about it. Tell him why you don't show your love to him in the first place. Damn it, Yunseo this is the basic things for a couple! Trust and honesty!". She screamed making I put the phone down on the bed and click the loudspeaker button. 

"I told you I have no courage to do so. You know how shy I am." I said in defense and she yelled again, "YAH HOW CAN YOU LET YOUR SHYNESS BROKE YOUR RELATIONSHIP?!". Why does Wendy is so great at stirring more questions in my head? "You know why he can't keep up with you?" she questioned and I sighed, "Because I am unpredictable.". "No, ." she groaned making I frowned, "He said that himself!". "No! It's because you are never honest with him! If he did something and you don't give any reaction then what would he feel?!" once again, Wendy knew what to say so I can get a grip of myself. "Gather up your courage, Yunseo. I'm pretty sure he is still waiting for you to confess what you really feel about him." Wendy said making I sighed, "I don't know..". Wendy let out a sigh for a nth time today, "Do whatever you want, Seo. Just know that I already gave you advices and if you end up becoming strangers with him, I'm always here."

I chuckled softly, "Strangers? We know each other well.". "Don't lie to me, Yunseo. I know you too well. Seo, I'm here for you to cry out loud." her words hit me so hard and I found myself tearing up, "Damn it, Wendy. Stop making me look weak!". I scolded her, tears already streaming down my face. "You are still a woman. All of us has weak hearts, all girls do. That is the use of girls, right? Comforting each other because we are the only one who understand what boys don't." Wendy stated. "I miss him, Wendy. I miss him so much."

That night ended with tears dried on my face, and Wendy never-ending comfort words to me.

-
I woke up due to Jimin endless text. I unlocked my phone with a squinted eyes, my eyes still hurt from last night. I saw a spam message, an audio actually; Jimin urgently asking me to listen to it. I replied with an 'okay, I'll listen to it' before clicking on the audio. Sighing a bit because of the tiredness last night.

Once I heard Jungkook's voice, my eyes almost bulged out of it socket. "Jungkook-ah.." I let out, knowing that my tears are coming out again.

'Love is so painful
Goodbyes are even more painful
I can’t go on if you’re not here
Love me, love me
Come back to my arms'

A message came that made me became a crybaby again; He produced it himself. 

How can he write a song that hit me in the heart so hard? "Stupid him. Ah.. seriously?" I laughed out of absurdity, wiping my endless tears. How the heck can I cry so easily?

-
Saturday, the day of the School Sports Day. The day I'll run. The day that I lost someone to run with, someone who I run to. The day that marked one month of our break up. 

"Prepare for the relay race!" our teacher said to all of the team and my eyes automatically darted to him. There he is, laughing with his friends, while stretching. I continued to watch him discreetly, saying the words of encouragement that I should give him in my mind. As the teacher asked them to get ready on the track, our eyes met and both of us were staring back at each other. His expression turns into the cold one, his eyes turn into the one who I couldn't read what was on his mind. While I am the same so-called ice princess.

The song that Jungkook made suddenly started to play at the back of my head, making my eyes start to doing it own things again. His eyebrows scrunched in confusion – worried? that made me quickly look away from him, started to stare out of space, unknowingly in Taehyung direction.

"Good luck for us!" I heard Jimin cheered to his team mates before getting ready. Unluckily, the last r