A/N: Blue text for your playlist. Just click on it for the songs.

“So what?” I walked off to one corner to eat my food. Jongin trailed me along and sneered silently. My stomach growled in reply when I stuffed those foods down my throat. Jongin’s hands were empty and pocketed in his pants. It appeared that he did not have much appetite tonight. “It’s fun… I love toying with Minseok and Yoon Sohee, and so does Joonmyun.” And it was not like I was together with Jongin, nor did I want to push him to acknowledge me as something more.

“I like that smart mouth,” It was so honest, blunt and brutal that I felt the direct stab at my heart. I dared not to look at Jongin anymore. It was unfair – in my opinion – that I seemed to be the only one who was so fond of him. I did wonder whether my feeling was reciprocated on his behalf, but I dared not think any further or I would fall deeper into the hole I dug. Kim Jongin was a walking riddle – and it was not one that I wanted to solve.

“Speaking of which,” He continued with his hands folded arrogantly. He did everything so naturally that it did not seem pretentious. That, and also the fact that he was drop-dead gorgeous. I was trying to distract myself from the missing three buttons of his black top and a smooth, nice blazer. His beauty was – in a way – almost too tempting to be passed on, and paired with his wicked tongue, I was done for. However, his next sentence was a mixed of amusement and concealed disappointment, “Ah, Kim Jongdae seems to be heading here. Must be the dance.”

I looked up from my half-finished plate to the direction Jongin was looking at. Kim Jongdae looked extremely dashing with his bow tie and black suit. His jawline was highlighted by the yellow dim light but it did not struck me as much as it used to. I secretly glanced at Jongin, and he was side-gazing me with his small signature smirk. “Don’t give me that smile, Kim Jongin. It always tells me that something bad would happen soon.”

“Paranoid princess,” He muttered when Jongdae was steps away from us. That guy was distracted left and right by a number of people who wanted to talk to him, but he only smiled and nodded politely and continued walking. Before Jongdae came, Jongin whispered in my ears, “Save the last dance for me, will you?” He took away my plate with a half-hearted sigh and walked away, as if he knew what would happen had he stayed.                   

“Jongdae,” I greeted cheerfully.

“Why, Sena, if it isn’t you looking so happy tonight,” Jongdae gave me a subtle mocking and extended his hands. I took it without much hesitation. He was one of the people I could consider as genuine friends because I knew him for almost as long as I knew Joonmyun. I loved his sarcasm and quick wit because they never failed to make my days brighter. “Actually, if you bother to look around, you’ll realise you’re probably the only happy one here.”

“I don’t care. They can be grim all they want, and I won’t give a F,” I grinned widely as we waltzed to the center of the room. I was quite the klutz when I danced, and Jongdae was no different. The first song of an official party like this was always a boring old-school jazz, but as soon as the second song started, we both stifled laughter and loosened up. It was Earned It and I loved it to bits. Jongdae spun me around as I tripped a step and almost fell had he not hold my wrist back with such force.

The Weeknd - Earned It

“I have always thought that I was the only one in my family who can’t dance, but then you came,” Jongdae burst out laughing. His words were mean and rude as always even when he didn’t mean it, “You’re just as bad as I am, if not worse. Oh God, this is precious. I have never seen anyone as clumsy as you. Who knows that Seiryuu heiress won’t be able to dance?”    

“Yeah, shut the up before I chuck the cocktail glass down your throat, Kim-effing-Jongdae,” I playfully glared at him and frowned as I watched my steps more carefully. I could hear the mocking laughter from my surrounding and tried to focus elsewhere. “What’s wrong with not being able to dance anyway? I’m only human, after all. I can’t be perfect in everything, you know?” – not like Jongin and Sehun or even Joonmyun. Wait, scratch that, Joonmyun was only a little better than I was at dancing. He was just as awkward.

“No one expects you to be perfect anyway,” Jongdae retorted.

“The two of you always fight like cats and dogs. There is never a time that you get along. How old are the two of you, really?” I heard Joonmyun sighed mockingly behind me. I pulled my hands away from Jongdae’s shoulder and turned around with a bright smile. Kim Joonmyun laughed and grasped my hands tightly, “Jongdae, Brother. Would you mind if I take my fiancée away from you for a round of dance?”    

“Do you take ‘no’ for an answer?” Jongdae asked and his brother shook his head with furrowed eyebrows. It was amusing how they interacted and how the youngest son now depended on Joonmyun since he was the only safe person he could rely on. Jongdae rolled his eyes and shooed us away. He was always so upfront with his feelings. There was not a thing he hid – and it was both a blessing and curse.

Say You Love Me - Jessie Ware

“Sena,” Joonmyun’s eyes were somewhat stony as we danced to Say You Love Me by Jessie Ware. Perhaps the lyrics affected the two of us in an inexplicable way. ‘Say you love me to my face. I need it more than your embrace. Just say you want me, that’s all it takes.’ There was unmistakable glint of moisture in his beautiful eyes. He could not be crying, could he? My heart was torn at the sight.

“Joonmyun,” My voice was hoarse as I touched his cheeks. “Is there anything you want to tell me?”

“What about you? Is there anything you want to tell me?” He leaned in and I flinched, avoiding his intense scrutiny. I did not know when I started hiding things from Joonmyun. I could have told him about my feelings, about Kim Jongin, but the ambiguity between us was so thick and I did not want to ruin his impressions of me any further. He let out a loud sneer, “Yoon Sena, you know you can be honest with me. I am not blind. What is going on with you and your protectors?”

Protectors. Plural form. Not singular. He did not know about Jongin yet. But this man was smart. He would find out soon enough.

“There is nothing going on between us,” I raised my eyebrows defiantly. Lying was one of my strong fortes, as it was Joonmyun’s, as well. We engaged in a staring battle on the dance floor, ignorant of others’ whispers. “What did you see that concerns you so much? My relationships with both Sehun and Jongin seem to be that of a lady and her bodyguards. Isn’t it normal?”

“Sure,” Joonmyun sarcastically laughed and snorted. “I was expecting a juicy gossip from you tonight, but if you decide to hide it, then whatever. Anytime something happens, let me know first.”

I rolled my eyes. This was Kim Joonmyun – my best friend, my partner, my fiancée, my soulmate. I realised that soulmates did not have to be two opposing sides, rather it could be two souls with the same hearts – just like the two of us. We were frighteningly similar to each other – though he was more outgoing and I was rigid. I knew I could rely on him no matter what happened. 

“You know I love you, Kim Joonmyun,” I said it endearingly in a sisterly manner. He froze. He was good in concealing his thoughts, but apparently not good enough to hide his feelings. His eyes were wide, looking at me in shock, as if he did not expect me to say that. It was odd, because we used to joke around all the time, throwing the word ‘love’ like it was free. But now… Now was different. He stiffened. “Alright, forget what I just said if you’re gonna behave so strangely. It was a joke, for God’s sake! Aren’t you gonna tell me you love me, too?”

His gaze immediately softened as he tugged my hair behind my ear and kissed my cheeks, “Of course, my Dearest. Of course it was a joke. It just caught me off-guard because I’m usually the cheesy one,” People cooed around us without understanding our conversation. To others, Joonmyun would look like a gentle lover, and I, a playful partner. What a pair! They said, and I would scoff behind their backs. I snickered and returned Joonmyun’s gaze in a seemingly loving manner. His voice was sweet and mellow and his stare so deep and intense I could have drown in those dark, seamless orbs, “I love you too, Yoon Sena.”

“Excuse me,” Taeyong cut us off right at the most romantic moment without a hint of guilt. “It’s my turn.”

“Taeyong,” I smirked.

“Sena,” He called out my name. I liked his carefree attitude. I admired how nonchalant he seemed even when people were throwing him dirty glares for his disrespectful title for me. He grasped my waist without hesitation as we slow-danced to a slow mix of Beyonce - Crazy in Love. I circled my hands around his neck and chuckled.

Beyonce - Crazy in Love (The Voice Kids)

“Bae, you’ve lost weight,” I remarked, noting the slimmer jawline and protruding bones of his neck. I had not talked to him since the training session weeks ago and I only realised how much I missed his indifferent face and his I-don’t-give-a--about-anything attitude. Even now, as we danced, he only glanced down at me occasionally, keeping his eyes trained on the dance floor.

“Same goes to you,” He smiled for a split-second. This boy was actually really beautiful – it was a pity he did not smile more. Unlike others, his laughter was shy and reserved and I could count by fingers – the way I did with Jongin – how many times he had smiled around me. His voice was a bare whisper as he leaned down to my ears and said, “I haven’t talked to you in a long while… Life’s been boring without your bland jokes.”

“Hey!” I wanted to hit his arms, but he would not let me. “I never make any bland jokes! Can’t you just admit you’re missing me in a normal way?”

He did not deny it. He just laughed as he held me very close. It felt so unnatural to be close to Taeyong. I never imagined he would hold me this way one day. It was not bad, it was just odd – a good kind of odd. Slowly, I loosened up and clung onto his arms. He was a really good dancer, and a very patient one. I only had to follow his steps and swung around in the most dignified manner. It was still funny, though.

“So who is next – assuming that you came after me in the first place, offering a dance,” I cheekily smiled. The bottom of my dress was twirling in the most beautiful way, like a rose in full-bloom and I was in awe by how much details and hard work Aunt Go Eun must have put into it. My feet was starting to get a little sore from the stilettos. “Is it Chanyeol or Kyungsoo? I haven’t seen them anywhere, by the way.”

“Next is me, Meimei,” Luhan tapped my shoulder. He had a soft smile on his radiant face. “Can I have the dance, my Gongzhu?”

*gongzhu = princess in Chinese

“You know sometimes I wish we would go back to the ten years old us, so that you won’t have to be the leader and I am not your Elite. We can be together, just like old times, as brother and sister, and best friends, playing around each other ignorantly. Back then, we were happier,” His words were sad, but his face was full of optimism. “Now that we’ve grown up, you have responsibilities to the whole clan and I have responsibility to you. Isn’t it kinda sad?”

Luhan did not speak much that night, but just as he was about to let go, I gently squeezed his hands and nodded with a smile, “I’m okay, Gege. As long as you are with me, I will be okay no matter what.” We used to be brother and sister, but the kiss changed everything. I truly did not want to play with his feelings – it was something I could not emphasize more. But everything I did seemed to be a bait. And I did not have the heart to tell him off cruelly. I was pathetic.

“Don’t pull that long face, Sena,” Sehun chuckled. His hand lifted halfway and dropped again. There was a wistful expression on his face that I could not comprehend. He wanted to say something but held back anxiously. “I guess I won’t have my dance, then. Jongin’s waiting for you behind that door, you know?”

“But the dance?” I asked him. It was unfair that I gave so much time to others and not to Sehun. How could he be so selfless and kind to me when I had treated him with doubt?

Sehun shook his head and gave me a smile – one I could not read into, “Just go.”

Behind that smile was pain he could not say and sadness he could not convey. Sometimes letting go could hurt so much – more than it ever did should he continue holding on...

A/N: Trust me, I tried really hard to give them equal amounts of time, but it's difficult because I don't want you guys to end up shipping the wrong guy. And I swear, don't hate on me if the guy you ship her with turns into a chopping onion-board (LOL) by the end of the story as a sacrificial lamb. So you'd better tell me before it's too late.

P.S: You know me and Death have a thing together, so expect that as well.