Hoya P.O.V

I’m done for today, my feet walk heavily and take me to a familiar cafe. A small blackboard stands outside with “Menu of the day” written on it attracts my eyes to read it. I stepped inside, crowded, as usual. “Americano please”, I lean on the counter and my eyes catch something. A sight. Someone I know,

Black hair, pale skin, and other things I don’t need to describe.

“Sir,” a short girl with curly hair called, “take your coffee and don’t make this line grow any longer.” I take my americano, “S..sorry” a small apology smile formed on my lips. She just stares at me coldly.

I sip my americano on my way to a table.

My feet stop, I canceled my mind to take a table. That ‘familiar sight’ is beside me now, She hides her face with her bangs, acting that she doesn’t notice me there. I sit across her, “Well hello,” I smile slyly to her.

 She shift her long bangs with her hand, “What do you want?”

My reaction when Dongwoo says “that”, and what my brain told me now. It’s 180 degrees turn.

It told me to make her suffer more.

I lean closer to her, my hand are on her cheek, “Look who wants me back”

“You’re extremely wrong,” Her eyes narrowed, “Lee Howon.”

My finger is rubbing her lips, “Come on, don’t do it. You can have me back..”

She smacks my hands, a pair of dark eyes are glaring at me.

I swear, If this is not a public place, I might be dead by now.

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You slam your house’s door, kicking off your heels and throw your coat away. The wall invites you to lean on it, a sigh of depression comes out perfectly from your mouth. You your hair roughly, pulling your bangs back. Tears start to fall down from your eyes, You don’t want to meet that guy. In one side, you want him back, on the other side, you hate him. So much.

Dealing with him is something you’re preventing now, You don’t want to see his face. You rise and hit the wall hard. You tuck your hair behind your ears. You’ve never been so depressed like this before, your foot guide you to your bedroom. A vase with red roses stands there beautifully, you walk toward it. That vase is broken by now, you’re tired of seeing that vase perched near your bed. And you realize how pathetic you’re for still keeping that roses.

You open your nightstand’s chest. There’s a picture of you and Hoya smiling. That vacation picture, you tore it into pieces. You sit on your bed’s corner and bite your fingers for a while, sighing harder than before.

You get into your bathroom, staring at the mirror for a while. Realizing you’re a serious mess by now, There are still some water in the bathtub. You’re depressed and insane enough to drown yourself in it. You stare blankly around the bathroom.

You stepped out of the bathroom, walking toward to your kitchen. You take a bottle of alcohol drink and a big amount of random medicines.

You lay on your bed, throw some pillows hardly and close your eyes. Calmer than before. You sit and drink straightly from the bottle, those medicines atrract you. Those medicines almost enters your mouth and you realize something. You let those medicines scattered on the floor, you unlocked your phone.

You still have hopes, somehow.

You’re looking for someone on your phone’s contact. You pushed the call button when you find ‘Dongwoo’. A cigarette lands between your index and middle finger while waiting for answer.

It’s connected but he doesn’t pick it up.

You throw yourself back to your bed and fall into a deep sleep after all of this tiring stuffs you have to deal with.

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