Please Don't Say You Love Me - Gabrielle Aplin (Play the song)

It was the first day of spring yet Soojung felt it is still one of her days in autumn. Withering, dying – like those days she is barely starting to move on from Taemin. She lost their child and she guessed that she lost his love forever. Taemin promised her everything, treated her like a precious gem, loved her when others did not – Taemin was her life; her all. When he left it was as if her life was taken and her soul drifted away with him. She doesn’t know where he is now, all she knows, he might be happier now because she’s no longer part of his life. She’s just a bitter memory needed to be forgotten.

Soojung held her longing gaze on the water. Somehow, the Han River calms her. The air soothes her heavy chest from thinking too much. Anxiety is consuming every bits of her but she cannot let it beat her up. She’s been thinking of letting go but when she’s trying to, she’ll go back running to his arms again then dampen the guilt and regret caged on her heart – an endless cycle that’s eating up what’s left on her.

She can’t let him go as much as he can’t let her go. Even Jong In wasn’t opening up about how he feels, she knew with every looks on his eyes, they feel the same way.

Soo Jung heaved a sigh as she let her thoughts be drowned by the calmness of the river.

“I wish it was that easy to let you go.”

“I’ve been calling you a lot of times. Don’t you know how to answer your phone?”

She looked up just to see a tall guy with disarrayed ashen hair hunched in front of her. He caressed his neck to his sharp jawline then sighed.

Soo Jung bowed a little with a small smile curved on her lips, “Sorry to bother you Sehun. I’m fine. Just tell him that I’m coming tonight.”

Sehun, 25 years of age. He is a civil engineer in the same firm Jong In is working and also his friend. Unlike Kyungsoo, Sehun knows nothing about his friend’s affair with her. All he knows Soo Jung is a close friend to him and she owes him a lot.

The young man sat beside her as he heave another sigh. Soo Jung kept her head hung low as she gnaw her drying lips. He let the silence linger with them as he watched her every moves. He is drowning just by looking at her. He was tired from running and looking for this lady beside him but the moment his eyes flicker and set on her, her serene beauty fades everything that bothers him. It is the same effect she has on him that he tries to deny it to himself. Because whenever he look at her, there is someone else on her eyes that she sees.

“I wish I was him.” Sehun mumbled to himself.

“No need for an apology. We’re friends, right?” Sehun tilted his head on her with a small smile.

Soojung only nod her head in agreement. It’s not that she’s uncomfortable with Sehun but whenever she’s with this young man, strange feeling starts to churn her stomach. It is not the same with what she feels with Jong In. She can’t exactly explain it but every time Sehun would look at her, it seems that Sehun’s staring at her soul through his eyes. Haunting and deep. She wanted to deny the growing strange feeling she has because whatever Sehun was thinking and trying to do, she doesn’t deserve him nor he deserve someone like her. She’s tainted for life and maybe when they both decided to let go, she’ll be living her peaceful life on her own.<