Jongin

            My very own concert, well technically not mine, but EXO! I can’t believe after two years we’ve got our very own fanclub name and our concert. Everything I’ve been dreaming have finally come true. My eyes were glossy from unshed tears as soon as the director reveals EXO’s plan for our concert.

            My first thoughts were Seulgi. I wanted to tell her that her best friend has finally achieved his dream and that he wanted to share his happiness with her. I opened my kakao talk and immediately lined Seulgi.

            “Seul! I have really good news! When will you be available?”

            I sent the text and accidentally saw Krystal’s name below Seulgi’s on my chat list. I remembered last night when she asked me if I have seen Jinri. Apparently Jinri, Sulli, had skipped her practice again. I sighed in guilt after I remembered how f(x) had debuted way longer before EXO did and yet we received our fandom name and our own concert before they did. I bit my lip and decided to remove the chat. I don’t want to feel guilty at a time where I should be celebrating.

            I turned off my phone and went to the practice room. We were already starting to practice all the choreographies that we will be performing for the concert. I really hope Seulgi could watch my performance, I wanted her to witness my success and in return I will also watch her concert in the future.

            We practiced all day and had very little break. The longest break was lunch time and that’s when I met Soojung.

            It was 12:30 when EXO were allowed to find their own lunch whether it be in the canteen, phone order or going to the restaurant across the street. Nobody chose the former because all they sold was kimbap and nothing else. Being the poor man I was, I left all my money at home and only had small money from my jeans pocket. It was enough to buy kimbap and that was what I had for lunch. I bought two rolls and decided to eat in the canteen because the practice room was empty.

            As I was searching for a seat I saw a very familiar back sitting alone on one of the tables. She was on the phone and seemed very tired. I approached her and sat down in front of her. It was Soojung.

            “Hey, mind if I sit here?”

            She looked up from her phone and saw me. “Well, you’re already seated anyway,” she let out a small smile. She looked at her phone one more time before turning it off and placing it on the table.

            “How are you?” She started. It’s been very long since I’ve had the chance to have a long one on one conversation with Soojung. The last time was when we had the pink tape photoshoot and after that we didn’t have much time to talk.

            “Great. EXO’s been getting great news this week!” I spilled. I looked at her growing smile and offered her a kimbap. She gladly accepted it and we shared as we talk.

            “Oh really? What was it?”

            I opened my mouth but no words came out. I was debating with myself whether I should tell her about the concert and the fandom name. I was afraid she would get offended and our friendship will end. I was also afraid she would just give me an encouraging smile when actually in her heart she feels disappointed. Last, I wasn’t sure if I wanted Soojung to know about this news before Seulgi does. Seulgi was there for me longer than Soojung and she understood me better than Soojung, but that doesn’t make Soojung a bad person compared to Seulgi. I was just closer to Seulgi than Soojung.

            Suddenly my train of thoughts were interrupted when Soojung inserted a piece of kimbap into my mouth.

            “So what is it? You seemed to be distracted.” She said as she pressed on the phone button on her phone, checking if there were any notifications.

            “Well,” I finished chewing and she looked at me with expectant eyes. “EXO will have their first concert soon. We were also informed that EXO’s fans will be called EXO-L.”

            She was silent for a few seconds and she quickly sent me an eyesmile.

            “EXO-L? What’s that suppose to mean?”

            I sighed in relief when I could see no hint of the incoming paroxysm of rage. “Well, you know how EXO is divided into EXO-K and EXO-M right?” She nodded as she leaned her head on her fist. “The letter L is between the letter K and M in the alphabet. Just like the letter, EXO-L what connects EXO-K and EXO-M. Like our slogan, “We are one,” the fans, EXO-K and EXO-M are one.” I explained and her eyes widened in realization.

            “I didn’t know SM was that smart.” She joked and laughed.

            “So tell me about your concert plans. How is it so far?”

            I began telling her about the practice sessions and the funny episodes happening. I saw her eyes were wrinkling from too much laughing. I was glad I could make her laugh.

            “So how are you?”

            She quieted down and her mood seemed to drop drastically.

            “I’m fine, but f(x) is not.” She fiddled with her phone accessory and sneaked a peek at me.

            “Tell me, I’m all ears. I promise I won’t tattle to any of the hyungs or the staff.” I joked. It has been an issue in SM where staffs who finished their contract with SM began revealing secrets to the media. They might even take a picture of me and Soojung right now and reveal to the media we were dating. I wouldn’t be surprised anymore. This is life as an idol where the human right to privacy no longer exist.

            “Jinri’s been skipping practices. We’re supposed to have a new promotion soon but things have been a bit messy these days and the company is fuming. They said our next promotion might be next year, or even later than that.” She combed her hair with her fingers. I noticed her hair had turned brown from blonde. I unconsciously felt her hair with my fingers and she looked at me surprised.

            “Sorry! I just wanted to check if your hair was damaged from the bleaching.” I admit sheepishly.

            She chuckled and nodded while feeling her hair herself. “Yeah, the blonde hair was the worst.”

            “I thought it was the red hair?” I teased.

            “Right! SM has always tried this damaging hair colors on me and Amber.”

            We laughed and I told her in EXO Sehun was the victim. No one in EXO could beat his hair during Wolf era. He had rainbow, green, pink and lots of other colors. I was worried about that kid’s scalp; he might get all his hair shaved by the end of the year.

            “I thought my blonde hair was the worst but this hair seemed to damage more than that.” I opened my snapback and showed her my grey hair. She felt it and when she took her hand back a strand of hair was trapped between her fingers.

            “You should consider going bald Jongin.” She said as she showed me the hair. I shook my head and continued eating my kimbap.

            “Hey I have to go back to my practice room,” I looked at her and nod, “I really enjoyed this conversation. I hope we could have these more.” I smiled and bid her goodbye.

            I smiled looking at her retreating back. I saw her socks and saw it was Winnie the Pooh and can’t help but think back to Seulgi. I checked my phone to see if she has replied but all I saw was a Read notification.

            I was confused and text her again. “Hey, I saw you read my message. So do you know when you can meet up with me?”

            I was met with another read. Turns out she just read the message recently. I was expecting her to send me a reply but all I got was, “Sorry Seulgi is currently in her schedule. This is her manager and we’re not sure when her next free time is yet. We don’t want her to give up any more of her sleeping time. I hope you understand Kai-ssi.”

            I replied to say I understood but inside I was sad. I was sad that Seulgi was finally entering the idol life. I put my phone back and finished my kimbap silently.

            At night I went to the dorm and opened my phone again to see if Seulgi had the chance to hold her own phone. I saw a notification from her contact and immediately got excited.

            “Hey Kimjong! Sorry I couldn’t reply faster, we had a schedule and a photoshoot for our single comeback.” Oh, so they’re going to be singing a new song soon. No wonder she’s busy.

            “I’m really sorry but the next free time would be tomorrow. We were done with the album photoshoo