“I am living in hell from one day to the next. But there is nothing I can do to escape. I don't know where I would go if I did. I feel utterly powerless, and that feeling is my prison. I entered of my own free will, I locked the door, and I threw away the key.”  

- Haruki Marukami

The weekend was to short and the bump on my forehead went down a lot so it wasn't noticeable. Sitting at the table eating my pancakes drowned in syrup while my knees were shaking uncontrollably. Stabbing my food with my fork for the last time I clanked it down on the plate. Not only did I not finish my pancakes which I always do but I'm pretty sure I looked in the mirror nine times , have two different shoes on, and didn't wash the pants I'm wearing. Hey, they smell like nothing so they were okay to me. Every surface my fingers were in reach with there would be a beat. Oh, you have no idea why I'm acting weirder than usual well its Monday and they can be very unpredictable so I am not taking any chances. Putting my plate in the sink and grabbing my backpack I walked out my warm house and into the chilly skin crawling weather.

Being extra sure to keep my eyes open so I wouldn't get lost I only put one earphone in. Bobbing my head to beat not noticing I am already getting lost into the music..

" .....You know I'd rather be alone.

But you call me on the phone, oh-"

My ear bud getting ripped out of my head cause my heart to leap. My head swung around so fast I swear I heard my neck pop. Glaring at the boy beside me with an innocent look on his face. Snatching the ear bud I looked right outside the window ignoring the glances that were heading my way. It was bliss until I felt a poke on my shoulder then it kept going then I finally  turned around and hissed at him, "Leave me alone." 'poke.poke.poke' "What do you want!" I shouted out loud forgetting that I was on a packed bus so I was getting glares from the ladies in the front. 

"Um, this is our stop..", he said trying to hold his laughter which was rude since I was upset with him.With the dignity I had left I walked quickly off the bus with my backpack of course and followed the other kids towards the school.

What a jerk!

Who did help you since you almost missed your stop.

He's also the reason why I am a laughing stalk.

He was being nice just now.

But he also was the reason I was hurt.

..I can never win with you can I?

Nope.

Smirking as I won the battle over my mind I bumped into a wall. Can I not be clumsy for one day? The bruise on my forehead is finally going away! Stupid wall. With my eyes closed and my hand rubbing my head I hear a deep chuckle.

"Well working out has done me some justice, but I wouldn't say stupid." I scrunch up my face in embarrassment and opened my eyes to see Jerk himself. Walking around him going even a faster pace then before when he grabbed my arm and pulled me towards him. "Sorry, for you know..", he trailed off looking down while he bit his lip. "Tell someone who actually cares." Then I snatched my arm and walked off, not before hearing, "I am going try to make you forgive me." The only way I'd forgive you if you never done it in the first place. And with that I headed off to my first period. 

I made sure to get to class first and sit in the back so I wouldn't have any attention on me. Remembering the song I was listening to before I was rudely interrupted I played it again.

"..- Oh the habits of my heart. "

"Hey Alex!" Rap Monster called out entering the class room with V and J-Hope behind him. I really should ask how they got their name.. Shrugging I still greeted them with a smile as J-Hope and him plopped down a row in front while V sat beside me happy that he got here first. Even when he was getting everything out of his backpack he was smiling which made me stare at him for a while till he turned towards me and hugged me still while having all of his pearly whites showing. How can he smile its a Monday!?!  His smile lowered just a little when he notice I wasn't speaking to him. I snapped out of my trance and gave him a big cheeky smile which he returned. I hope they don't know what happened Friday.. bitting my lip I was hesitating on a question to ask them. "Guys.." , They all looked at me with full attention. "Where were you guys on Friday?", They tensed but I was too oblivious to notice since I was nervous myself. "Sick" "Skipped" "I just forgot to wake up", a smiling V said while scratching the nape of his neck. They're hiding something, but aren't we all... Shrugging to myself I let the topic go. "Why. Did you miss us? " , Rap Monster said wiggling his eyebrows. I just shook my head and faced the front with a smirk.

Poke. Poke. Poke. The stabbing that continually kept distracting me from todays lesson that I was not even paying attention to was staring to slowly make me lose my mind.  Po-  Before the finger retracted I spun around and did the only thing I could think of.. bit it.  A scream caused the teacher to stop talking, a kid in the back to stop snoring (aka V), Rap Monster to silently giggle. J-Hope was cradling his poor index finger that was poking me not too long ago.

"Hyung. What's the matter?" ,V asked while rubbing his eyes without knowing the whole class was watching. Oh this little innocent dude.

"Ahem. As I was saying plants release oxygen while they.." I didn't even hear what else she had to say laying my head down on the cold desk that felt like a pillow after a while.

Looking at the big pancake drowned in syrup I grabbed the gigantic fork and had a chunk of pancake on it. Just as it was about to reach my mouth. "Should we wake her up or take a picture." "Dude, I don't want to know what's going on in the little pretty head of hers.." I jolted up right to find seven people with amusement in their eyes.  Wiping all the drool on the side of my cheek I stood up, got my stuff and walked away with swag. Walking through the hallways wasn't so hard since it was almost time for the next period and kids were scattering like roaches. A girl with short, black, straight hair was coming towards to me with a big smile. Is there dried drool on my face? Did I forget to put on shoes? Glancing at my feet to see indeed I did have on shoes I looked upwards toward the girl and frowned.

"Hey Alec" It's Alex.

"Heyy." I added y's since I did not know her name, just like she didn't know mines. Guess it didn't matter since she kept on with the conversation.

"So I have a favor to ask you.. Can you umm..um." She couldn't get the words out and I raised my eyebrows. "Yes." I said wanting to hurry up and get to class.

"Well I wanted you to give this to Suga for me. I mean I know he doesn't like anyone, I don't have a crush on him if that is what your thinking.. I would like him to urgh." Stomping her foot out and glaring at her balled up fist she raised her hand and shoves a piece of paper in my hand and gave it to me. Give this to him please. She whispered but I heard it loud and clear. She met my eyes and stuck her bottom lip out. Don't fall for it. Don't fa- "Ok fine." Then she was gone.

"I can't say no.."

Barely making it on time to class all eyes were on me.  Way to go Alex.  Suga who was the only person in my second period who I knew was mocking me, no not for being late, he had both hands together like he was praying on his cheek with his mouth wide open and I was the only one who had seen it. Cute. I walked down the isle to sit right where  he was and plopped right down on the seat next to him and gave him the piece of paper the girl handed me before she vanished.

"Are trying to confess your undying love for me? Awe cute."

"You wish.", I muttered with my cheeks turning a light shade of red. He said 'cute'. Stop it Alex get with the program.

He glanced at it and his expression was unwavering as he ripped the love letter apart. I stared at it with astonishment and gave him a questioning look. He smirked  and said "I'm not looking for love." ,he smiled and faced the front. "Since I think I already found it.", but I was in a daze from his smile I was to happy to pay attention to what he said afterward.

"It's ripping in your part. 

You get too close, you make it hard to let you go."

I am back!!! Thank you for everyone who is still subscribed to my story, I know I haven't been the best author but I am getting better :) I promise in the Summer there will be more updates... If I need to fix anything just tell me ok? Love you guys

|| BeautifulDistraction