Perfection

Perfection
4900+ Words
Luhan meets Kyungsoo

Kai knows that his life is basically perfect. He knows because it is laid out in front of him every day. He wakes up to his perfect boyfriend, perfect apartment and knows he cannot want for more. They even have a pet for goodness sake and the trappings of it all are something Kai wouldn't have dreamt of over a year ago. Kai even has a stable job and an income. His best friend is dating and his other best friend is in a solid relationship. Kai literally doesn't know what else he can ask for. So then why, at this very moment in time, is Kai staring at the busy street feeling like the world is pressing down on him?

Kai shuffles in his jacket, hands buried in his pockets, as he waits in front of the small production company's door. Had Tao not moved in with Kris, he could have simply called the other hybrid to let him in, but even Tao’s life has improved. Kai is happy for the other, he really truly is, but he currently feels like kicking in the door so that he can just get inside. Kai watches the steam that is his breath float away before his eyes. He lifts his scarf up over half of his face. It is too cold to be standing around doing nothing, but waiting is all he can do.

No one can be blamed for his having to wait. It is his fault for coming early. There is no reason for it, no need for him to be the first one to arrive. Perhaps he wouldn't have if it hadn't been for the way the morning had played out.

Kai always leaves just after Luhan. Luhan does have his reasons for getting to work a bit early. It is their routine and what Kai is used to. That morning, Luhan changed everything by intruding on Kai’s space when he was getting ready. Kai was in the bathroom, trying to arrange his hair into some sort of fashion around the blonde white ears when Luhan had popped in and thrown his arms over the younger’s shoulders.

“Go out with me tomorrow?” Luhan asked, his voice tinted with mischievousness.

Kai could feel his boyfriend’s lean body against his back, the distraction being far too tempting. Kai had smiled and shrugged off the older as being playful until Luhan had shaken him and asked the question again.

“But we both work tomorrow,” Kai retorted with a sad frown.

“I am calling out tomorrow. It won't make or break the business. What do you say? Go out with me?” Luhan tried again.

It wasn't as though Kai and Luhan didn't make time for each other. They went out to eat once, maybe twice a week. There were the concerts that happened every so often. And they did share a place. It wasn't as though they lived far apart. Still, Luhan had wanted to spend a day with him. Kai should have been elated. However, there was something about the request that made Kai want to decline. They shouldn’t skip work for frivolous reasons. Luhan shouldn’t be this cute and spontaneous. Kai didn’t think he could handle any more of the perfection.

“I should get going,” Kai murmured, rolling his shoulders so that Luhan would let go.

“Something important going on today?” Luhan had asked. His quick change of topic made Kai feel guilty. It was obvious that Luhan cared a great deal since he wasn't pouting or complaining that Kai was basically blowing him off.

“I’d like to get a head start. We have a lengthy practice this afternoon and I want to make sure I’m on top of my steps before I show the others,” Kai lied. He always had his steps down well, extra practice being a little unnecessary. He had designed the dance after all.

“You aren’t nervous about practicing with Kyungsoo still, are you?” Luhan asked, honestly worried for how his boyfriend sometimes behaved before and after seeing his ex.

Kai shook his head. Kyungsoo wasn’t anything for the younger to really worry about anymore. He had a perfectly well balanced working relationship with the other. Perfectly, Kai felt like rolling his eyes as the word filled his thoughts once again.

Before Luhan could ask him anything else, Kai left the restroom and took up his belongings to rush out the door.

Maybe standing outside in the cold isn’t perfect. It definitely is not ideal, but with the way Kai is feeling, a little bit of imperfection seems necessary and welcome.

Kai can't pinpoint what is wrong with him. He feels almost lethargic, having to mentally will himself the energy just to get through his workday. When Tao asked out of concern and even Kris had asked him if he needed a break, Kai simply smiled and told them that he was okay. In truth, Kai really is okay. He feels physically fine. He isn’t experiencing any aches or pains. The only thing that doesn’t seem okay is his mood. Kai wishes he could will away the ever pressing feeling of the universe on his shoulders, but he figures that he will snap out of it in a day or two. Being at work is definitely not a distraction if his determination to just crawl up onto some space and curl up into a ball until the feeling passed is any indication.

Kai continues to pretend that he has energy throughout his entire day. He had practiced in the morning. He sat in on a few casual meetings before lunch. He even skipped lunch to run through another practice. He put in for some say on things that Tao wanted an extra opinion on and that Kris valued not only from one of his employees but as someone who he was considering a friend albeit through the connection the choreographer had with his boyfriend. Kai has run through everything he needs to right up to the actual three hour scheduled dance practice in which a small team and Kyungsoo himself will be attending.

“D.O is here,” Tao says, pulling Kai out of his spiral of thoughts. The younger nods and squares his shoulders as if the posture will somehow help to summon whatever he needs to get through this practice. He enters the practice room with a smile, greeting the rising star and the team he has grown familiar with over the past few months. They know each other well. They know each other’s weaknesses and strengths as dancers and it is all information that Kai has used to shape dynamics of the dance. Kai is confident that if they pull this off, his ex’s career will be hotter than ever. Kai moves to take his position in the middle of the room, quickly explaining how he’d like their configuration to begin. Once they’re in position, Kai begins to show them the dance a handful of steps at a time.

They pick it up naturally, moving quickly from learning steps to practicing fluidity and preciseness. Kai sees three of the dancers skip over two steps and stops the music so they can run through it again. He isn’t annoyed or discouraged by the small hiccups. It is all practice anyway, so Kai has a great deal of patience with the room full of dancers.

“It’s a little hot in here,” Kyungsoo states while fanning his face with his hand. “Can’t we crack a window?”

“And let that weather in here?” Kai retorts quickly. It isn’t that he wants to snap at the other, but they are in the middle of working. The building is decently ventilated and Kai reasons that it’s just the number of bodies in the room making things a little bit stuffy. He definitely doesn’t feel like the room is too hot and so he dismisses the request.

“Just a little. A small breeze would be nice,” one of the dancers agrees.

Kai shakes his head. “It’s not that bad. We have less than an hour left. Let’s just keep practicing.”

A few in the group look at Kai in disappointment, but everyone falls back into step. Kai feels like he has to double step to keep up with the group when he is expected to pause to concentrate on showing individuals what they need to do. It's tiring, but Kai can barely tell the difference between exhaustion and the ridiculous unexplained mood that he has been in. He persists in what he's doing because above all, he is a professional and no one is going to say otherwise especially to the hybrid who is under harsher criticism than if he'd been born strictly human. Maybe everything isn't perfect, but Kai is trying his best.

They reach the end of the routine highly satisfied. Kyungsoo is applauding everyone’s efforts while they are praising the creativity of the dance. Kai is panting while smiling in thanks and waving off the compliments while mentally arguing that this is what he does and it doesn't require extra praise. However, it does make the extra push he had given that day worth the effort.

The dancers leave while Kyungsoo is wiping his face with a towel and side-eying Kai. He isn't oblivious to the way his ex is looking at him, but he is far too tired to care.

“You look exhausted,” Kyungsoo says after a few moments of silence, minus the sound of both of them catching their breath.

“That was a three hour dance practice,” Kai huffs since the observation is rather unnecessary.

“No, I mean, not just practice tired but actually exhausted. Are you okay?” the hybrid asks.

Kai shrugs, “I’m fine.”

Kyungsoo nods in thought. “Get some rest then.”

Kai looks at the other in slight surprise. Not only is it not Kyungsoo’s place to really worry about the younger, but he had never really been that good about it in the past. His patience always wore too thin with things like this, at least as far as Kai can remember. With a small smile, Kai picks up his things after shutting off the equipment in the room and motions to the door for Kyungsoo to leave before he does.

Kai really is tired. His body is weighed down with fatigue. He wants little more than to find a place where he can lay his head comfortably and let his mind rest. Kai thinks that maybe Luhan’s lap is such a place, if his boyfriend will accommodate him after having ignored him all day.

Kai’s eyes widen as he remembers. Luhan had begun texting him just minutes after he’d finally gained access into the building to ask how things were going. Kai had ignored him. Kai had ignored his boyfriend’s texts so much that his phone was currently inside of Tao’s office having been abandoned so that Kai didn’t have to feel the guilt of not answering Luhan that morning. In fact, Kai’s phone has been in the office since before lunch. He almost can’t believe how far he had put it out of his mind until just now.

“Excuse me,” Kai rushes out as he passes Kyungsoo in the hall while quickening his steps without actually running. He doesn’t know if Kyungsoo had responded for his mind is entirely upon the forgotten cell phone.

Kai sprints past other co-workers that are leaving and prays that Tao and Kris haven’t already left for the day.

As he rounds the last corner, his heart clenches to see the door closed. It’s actually typical for the room to be closed off, but Kai’s mental pleads to any deity that the door is at least unlocked is all his mind can conjure in that moment.

The hybrid runs, now that no one is looking at him, hands almost slamming against the paneling of the door before gripping for the handle.

Kai exhales heavily as the door clicks open revealing a mostly vacant office. He spots his phone on the desk and rushes to grab it. The screen is lit showing a list of messages that are still coming through for him, all of which are from Luhan. Kai doesn’t even read the list of messages while he works to unlock his phone and open the app so he can just see the damage he has caused by ignoring his boyfriend all day.

Kai doesn’t feel exhausted until he reads the entire flow of messages. His boyfriend blames himself for why Kai isn’t talking to him and that is the last thing that Kai wants the other to assume. Kai isn’t the slightest bit upset at Luhan at all. Blinking, Kai struggles to think of something he can say quickly that will ease all of Luhan’s worries. He looks up from his phone at the room and wonders how he can explain himself or apologize for making Luhan so upset. Kai is staring at a rather abstract decoration that is hung flat against the wall behind the desk when the space around him seems like it is stretching outward and making the object look incredibly far away. Kai blinks, but finds that the scene around him quickly morphs again making his surroundings seem rather odd and unfamiliar.

“Kai?” someone calls to him.

Kai doesn’t see anyone in front of him, but his head is feeling rather light and heavy at the same time. Kai closes his eyes but finds that it just makes things worse. He is pretty sure he is swaying and off balance. Kai suddenly feels a cold sensation all over his body but the air around him is warm and he is suddenly sweating again, this time it is not as the result from the previous exercise. Kai doesn't understand what is going on even as the room suddenly tilts.

Kai painfully recognizes the sudden hold someone has on him and he isn't sure that he likes it, but he knows that he can't fight it either.

Luhan has already been pacing their living room for well over an hour after noticing that following a full day of silence, his texts to his boyfriend have been marked as read instead of simply delivered. He thought that maybe Kai had been too busy to see his messages, but now that he has seen them, Luhan is curious as to the lack of reply. He has spent the day wondering what exactly he had done wrong, but it wasn’t until his messages became seen and unanswered that Luhan is convinced that he really was at fault. It isn’t like Kai to blatantly ignore him. The younger would rather fight him through something than completely turn a cold shoulder.

Luhan isn’t sure what to do. He can apologize or try to call him but he really just wants a response. He thinks through that morning and even the night before. There isn’t anything that Luhan can unmistakably label as a wrongdoing. Luhan shakes his head and sits down heavily on the couch.

He doesn’t particularly notice when Nicholas haphazardly jumps up onto the couch. Luhan doesn’t really pay attention to the cat until his paws are on the side of his thigh pressing to get his attention. Luhan absently pets the feline until the purring starts to reassure him. Luhan adores Nicholas, but he wishes it is Kai purring on his lap instead of the cat. With his own sigh, Luhan lets himself calm down his thoughts while waiting for Kai to come home.

Luhan and Nicholas are basking in the silence of the apartment when Luhan’s phone suddenly goes off. The ringtone slices through the quiet, startling both the feline and the human instantly. Luhan picks up the device, not recognizing the number but not caring. “Hello?” he asks curiously.

“This call is regarding Kim Kai. Is this Lu Han?” a woman’s voice asks.

“Yes. Is something wrong?” Luhan rushes out, immediately panicking. Nicholas moves from his lap as Luhan rises from the couch.

“Mr. Kim is being treated as a patient at East Bay Medical Center. As the patient is unconscious, we are required to reach out to any emergency contacts, however I do need to stress to you that Mr. Kim will be just fine.”

Luhan is unfamiliar with the center that the woman spoke of. “I don’t know where the East Bay Center is.”

The woman quickly rattles off an address. Luhan writes it down on the first paper he can find. After promising to be there shortly, he scrambles for his shoes, jacket, and purposefully pulls one of Kai’s scarves from the closet as well. Barely remembering to lock the door, Luhan scurries towards the elevator that will take him to the below ground parking. She said Kai is fine, Luhan tells himself. Still, something has happened to his boyfriend and he isn’t about to calm down until he can see Kai for himself.

Luhan walks quickly down the directed corridor towards room 211, the room that Kai is apparently in. He spent the drive wondering just what could have happened but he had to pay attention to the navigation system, so the random thoughts were kept at bay until he walked into the medical center. From the quick observation of the lobby, the center specifically catered to hybrids. Luhan wonders why Kai has been taken to this center when the one that Suho prefers to take Chen is much closer to all of them. Still, the curiosity over the matter is outweighed by the worry for Kai’s condition. Luhan finally sees the door numbers getting closer to the one he is seeking. As he finds the door and pushes his way inside, he has to stop when he realizes that he is not the only one in the room with Kai.

Leaning over the bed is a black hybrid feline. It isn’t Tao. Despite the black ears, the height and overall physique of the stranger is very different from the Siamese hybrid. This hybrid is fussing over the sheets with black-gloved hands and looking as though he is waiting for Kai to wake up at any moment. Luhan can’t see his face, but he leans a little to his right as though it will help him see. The other isn’t in uniform or wearing anything that Luhan would make him think he worked at the center. If Luhan were being honest, the gloved hands make him look a bit like a criminal which makes him worry just a little bit more.

“Excuse me but… who?” Luhan asks, letting the sentence trail off while waiting for an explanation. The hybrid turns around and pierces Luhan with violet colored eyes. Luhan blinks a few times while waiting for an answer while slowly approaching Kai’s bed.

“My name is Kyungsoo,” the other finally states, violet eyes narrowing as if dissecting Luhan entirely with his gaze.

Oh . Luhan has to hold back his every need to throw the hybrid out of the room. He doesn’t know what happened or why the other is there, but Luhan is with Kai now which means that his ex doesn’t need to be there at all. Except, Luhan is suddenly curious as to exactly why Kai’s ex is standing in the room.

“And you are?” Kyungsoo asks with very little patience as though Luhan should have answered him a while ago.

“Luhan,” he answers.

Kyungsoo’s eyes narrow even more and he scoffs. “The human.”

“Kai’s boyfriend,” Luhan clarifies with a smirk.

“A mistake that I’m sure he will understand when he wakes up. What are you doing to him so that he would faint at work?” Kyungsoo snaps.

Luhan looks at the other incredulously. “Excuse me?”

“What are you doing to him?” Kyungsoo repeats.

Luhan shakes his head as he frowns at the other. He feels defensive and angry. Out of anyone on this planet, Luhan thinks Kyungsoo is the last person who should be asking such a question. “You must have me confused with yourself. I’ve never treated Kai with anything less than love and admiration. You, however, should leave.”

Kyungsoo glares with barely contained venom. “He fell unconscious after running to check his phone. I don’t have his passcode or else I’m sure I’d find the incriminating texts. No doubt it was some stress on your behalf that made him collapse.”

“Look, I don’t know what your sudden problem is but I am sure that if Kai were to wake up, it would be you that he would ask to leave,” Luhan snaps at the other. While his strained communication with his boyfriend had him worried for most of the day, he doesn’t believe that it is cause for why Kai collapsed.

“You don’t know how to take care of him. You aren’t like us. You don’t get it!” Kyungsoo fires back.

A sudden knock on the door stops Luhan from saying anything in return. Both of them look at the door to Kai’s room as another hybrid steps through, this one wearing a white coat and looking every bit as professional as Luhan would expect. “Gentlemen,” he says as though knowing that the two had previously been in the midst of an argument. “I assume one of you is Luhan?”

Luhan raises his hand, “Kai’s boyfriend.”

He hears Kyungsoo scoff in anger. “I was the one who found him and brought him here.”

“Well,” the doctor starts while clearing his throat. “It seems he collapsed from exhaustion. He is in the early stages of developing the flu and is likely unaware that he is sick. The IV he has is just for hydration and we will send him home with some recommendations for over the counter medication you can get him. We’d give him the flu shot, but as he’s already contracted it – it’s best his system work through it,” he says more to Luhan than the other.

Luhan breathes a sigh of relief and thanks the doctor. After the man leaves the room, Luhan turns his gaze on the other. “The flu isn’t something only hybrids get. You can rest assured that Kai will be well taken care of as soon as I can take him home,” Luhan says with a snarl to his voice.

Kyungsoo looks as though he is about to pounce. The action recognized by Luhan even though the other makes no move to avoid the hybrid’s advance. He is fully prepared to defend himself if the situation demands it. Luhan clenches his teeth and tightens his hand into a fist. He can honestly say he has never disliked someone so much as the purple eyed hybrid.

“Soo?” Kai suddenly squeaks. Both men turn to look at the blonde hybrid in relieved surprise.

“I’m here!” Kyungsoo calls, demeanor changing immediately as he returns to Kai’s side. He anxiously pulls the gloves from his hands as he readies himself to touch Kai.

His paw never comes in contact with Kai’s face as Luhan has a sturdy grip on the other’s wrist.

Kai can’t believe what he is seeing. He is still trying to collect himself, but what he does know is that his ex and his boyfriend are in the same room - something Kai thought he would be able to avoid.

“Don’t touch him,” Luhan seethes.

Kai’s eyes quickly move to his boyfriend. His heart does a curious dance at the anger and protectiveness the other is projecting. It’s a bit much for the hybrid that has just woken up in surroundings he hadn’t expected. Kai’s chest is tight as he tries hard not to smile at the older. Luhan is his kind and optimistic boyfriend. Other than the time he had stood up to his parents, this role is one that Kai doesn’t get to see.

Kyungsoo rips his arm from Luhan’s hold. Luhan steps back as the man takes a swipe at him. Luhan spies the way his claws are protruding and thanks his reflexes for moving in time to avoid them. No doubt they would hurt much worse than when Nicholas gets impatient at home. Luhan wonders if Kai has ever been at the receiving end of that strike. “Get the out,” Luhan growls, pointing towards the door.

“Like hell, human!” Kyungsoo returns.

“Soo…” Kai pleads. He doesn’t want to see Kyungsoo take another swipe at Luhan and he definitely doesn’t want the two of them to brawl on his behalf. “Just go. I’ll see you at the next practice, okay?”

“You really are going to stay with him aren’t you?” Kyungsoo asks, voice dripping in disgust.

“Yes,” Kai answers quickly and easily.

Luhan doesn’t move. His stance doesn’t shift and he doesn’t say another word to the hybrid. He waits until Kyungsoo finally moves towards the door. Luhan wants to say so many things to the other. He wants to fight him, to make up for whatever torment he’s caused Kai in the past. Mostly, Luhan just wants to knock some sense into the man so that he will realize that Kai is his past and will never be his future. Kai is Luhan’s future.

“Lu…” Kai breathes as soon as he believes the two are alone. “I’m sorry!”

Luhan shakes his head to get rid of his stupor and looks at Kai. The younger looks somewhat pale and Luhan cringes to think that he was getting sick and hadn’t noticed. “You have nothing to be sorry about.”

“I do! I ignored your texts all day. It wasn’t you. I was just having an off day. I was about to answer you, I swear, but then the room started to spin and I guess I fainted.”

Luhan shook his head, a small smile tugging at his lips, while he moved to sit on the edge of the bed. “You have the flu, baby. You are sick and overdid yourself today. I’m not upset at all. I’m just glad you’re alright.”

Kai would have scoffed at the pet name, but he was too relieved that Luhan seemed okay. “I’m sorry you had to meet him.”

Luhan shrugged. “He doesn’t treat you like this every time you practice does he? He doesn’t try to touch you?”

Kai shakes his head. “Not since that one time. When he kissed me? That was it. Everything has been professional since.”

Luhan takes in a deep breath and lets it out while sorting his thoughts. “I don’t like this. I know this is the best opportunity you’ve had and that things have been going really well, but I really wish you didn’t have to work with him.”

“So do I,” Kai admits. Luhan leans forward and places a kiss against the blonde’s forehead. Smiling at him, he fondly reaches up to caress the top of Kai’s ear. The endearment is one that Kai is used to as being Luhan’s favorite loving gesture towards the younger. Kai smiles in return, happy that there isn’t any more awkwardness between them.

From just past the door to Kai’s room, Kyungsoo moves back a few steps before turning to walk down the hall. All he can think about is how much he really hates humans.

“I’ve almost got the soup ready! I’ll be there in a minute!”

“You don’t have to feed me in bed. It’s the flu! I’m not crippled. I can make it to the kitchen!” Kai hollers from the bedroom.

“Stay there!” Luhan shouts in return.

Kai rolls his eyes and resituates against the stack of pillows that had been carefully placed for his comfort. It wouldn’t have been so bad had Nicholas not taken to the highest pillow, finding a spot just behind Kai’s head where he could perch. Kai wants to push the pesky cat away from his head but worries that despite his condition, Luhan might snap at him for being mean. Kai tries to relax while his stomach grumbles with hunger.

Apparently, Nicholas mistakes the sound for purring. Thinking Kai is content, Nicholas rubs his head against the back of Kai’s before happily at the top of Kai’s ear. Kai cringes and moves his hand to swat at the cat when Luhan steps into the room.

“Nicholas, knock it off. Kai doesn’t want your saliva all over him when he’s sick,” Luhan scolds.

Kai smirks, thankful that Luhan is on his side, yet his playfulness gets the best of him. “It’s cleaner than yours,” Kai teases.

“Yes, well, I have no intention to bother you with my saliva while you’re sick,” Luhan counters back. He places the tray at Kai’s side, the smell of the soup almost distracting the hybrid entirely. When Luhan notices that Kai doesn’t have another retort in store and would rather eat, he turns quickly to clean up the mess he has made from cooking.

Kai lifts a spoon of the steaming broth to his mouth and is about to drink it down when Nicholas at his ear again. Kai shakes his head, the movement causing him to spill a little bit of the soup on the bedding. “Now look at what you’ve done. Stupid cat.”

Nicholas meows but doesn’t budge.

“Just so you know, I’m not returning the favor,” Kai spats.

Nicholas finally chooses to move from the pillow, landing on the bed and shaking the tray and the bowl so that the contents slosh a little onto the tray.

“Brat!” Kai exclaims as he looks at his food.

“What?!” Luhan calls from the kitchen.

“Nothing,” Kai answers, resolving to eat what hasn’t been spilt of the meal.

Nicholas moves from the room. A moment later, Kai lets out a growl as he hears Luhan happily greeting the cat. The attention Nicholas gets further delays the older from returning to the bedroom to dote on his sick hybrid boyfriend. Kai wonders, nearly everyday, why he ever allowed the cat to stay.

Maybe life isn’t one hundred percent perfect but somehow Kai thinks he can live with it.

A/N

We're getting dangerously close to a Ksoo side chapter... ;)

Also, I really wish I could have a source of new LuKai images, but .... *sigh*

I wrote this entire chapter to "Catch Me When I Fall" btw... isn't Luhan doing so well for himself?? *cries*