HOYA POV

I'm dreaming right ??

If this is a dream .. Please don't wake me up 

If I'm gonna die anyway.. Can this be my last memory 

I don't want to remember all those bad feelings 

What I did and how I felt 

And worse what i did to him

If this is wrong 

I don't wanna be right 

I'm doomed 

I lost track of time.. If someone will tell me that Hoya you are a touchy person I would have laugh my off and probably kick his as well.. But here I am wrapped against him in a way i would not imagine myself will ever be

I'm clinging to him not just physically 

My emotions are all over the place and I try to keep them in check 

Because it's only seconds 

Before Myungsoo wake up and start realizing this 

And he did

His buried face against my neck suddenly let out a breath 

Silent was deadly and I felt him stiffen against me 

Myungsoo is in a phase where he thinks hard 

I bet he want to pull himself but too embarrassed to do anyway 

I bite my lips.. I don't want him to think about this and what it means whatsoever

Hell I don't wanna put name to it.. The idea itself scare the hell out of me 

I'm not okay with myself 

How can I pull him to this 

But last time I checked 

I've been attacked twice 

And damn it

It felt good 

(Mentally slapping myself)

My hand reached to his back hair it gently: “Does it hurt here ?”

He let another breath against my neck and muffled whispers: “Down, there, yeeh”

Those are the ist words I ever heard 

And he let them out effortlessly while I'm trying not to go there but damn it too late 

Too late ert howon..

He's getting un-stiffen and I bury my fingers in his golden locks messaging his scalp 

And I try not to get carried away and scare this kitten away

I don't want things to be complicated.. I want him to feel that this was ok but I can't even put those feelings in words and honestly I don't want to have serious talk..!!

Amongst everything that is happening now 

There's a sick urge to have more and  I try to shrug it off 

But if he keep nuzzling his head in my neck and breathing against my flesh and I'm wrapped on his waist like this and his hair is  

And whenever I more I want more so I need to ing stop 

His hand is rubbing my back 

And I'm no saint to ignore my needs like this 

Hoya: “Should we call it a night ? Go to sleep ..?” (Breathless)

He stiffen again.. And then pull off slowly .. His eyes are averting to my face.. And god 

He look more hotter than ever 

The fact I made him look like that 

His messy hair.. His burning face and that heavy eyelid stare 

He's confused but he's not denying this

And that's good so far he pulled out but his hands are still loosely on my waist as if he don't want to pull away fully

Who am I to judge him.. I'm still attached to his waist: “Maybe we should” (voice trail off)

He nod .. That myung agreeing on everything to Hoya says nod.. And I hide a smile 

He frown: “Told you to stop doing that”

His voice have that feeling of not being used for so damn long that is too damn hoarse and sharp and I shiver 

I gulp.. I know I'm staring at his lips again.. It's too puffy and pinkish and too swollen and that vivid flashback make me redden 

And so he does 

While still staring I say: “Stop what ...?” (I'm teasing I know)

L frown again and then stare at my eyes so I have to look at him: “Do you always do that ty teasing with all other men?,” There's amusement and dimples popping with that statement

My eyes widen at him and I gasp: “Bad Myungsoo,” Voice almost like a whisper

He blushes

Damn it 

I bite my lower lip and his eyes is shadowing every emotion I make: “Who taught you that ?” (Hint of a smirk) 

He drew me in that only inch separate our faces while he intertwined his fingers behind my back: “Hyung did..!”

Is he for real ..?

He do that then he turn all innocent on me.. I'm dying here.. I'm trying to be a good guy which I am not it's totally useless to try.. I do want this and I want more I've been waiting forever but why 

Why I feel I'm stepping in a hole 

And I'm panicked to death that he will push me away any seconds and freak out on me

But then he does this 

The hot and cold damn it myung .. Such a tease

I wet my lip unintentionally but he still stare at it and only his stare can make me feel this good: “The movie probably over,” Even my voice is not convincing

He nod again 

I his hair again

He let out a chuckle 

I wanna pet him for real T.T .. I'm not a bad hyung .. Really !

His features are literally gone with two dimpled smile and I feel like cursing out loud but his voice break again: 

“Hyung..,” He's not looking at me “maybe I should ..,” Pause.. Eyes slowly searching mine, “I mean you probably tired .. And .. I .. I mean I can,” I'm biting my lower lip.. This is too cute to make it stop, “I can carry you to bed,” says impatiently

He's so not looking at me... His face is beyond red and I think my lower lip is bleeding because damn it Myungsoo is too adorable 

I chuckled and then he look at me.. He pout but there's still amusement in that stare

Hoya: “So that's what you usually do ..??”

L's nodding while adding: “You mean use people injuries in my own benefits then yes,” chuckling

Am Rising eyebrow: “Benefits you say..”

He chuckles again.. 

I untangle my legs and he look disappointed that I smile mentally.. I slightly kick one of his legs: “I can walk on my own”

He nod while his hands is leaving my waist 

And then he turn.. I'm still looking at him.. Because I probably not capable of walking with that leg or without anyway 

He look at the pot and literally take it and dump it in the basket 

Hoya: “Yaahhhhh”

L: “No one want to eat that anyway,” he took seconds to think “Yeol won't ask about food right ?”

He shrug saying: “He's probably too hard of that movie anyway”

And as soon he say that he redden again 

L, trying to escape after throwing everything away: “Ok goodnight”

He didn't wait for me to say anything.. 

It's awkward .. I know.. We barely had decent conversation anyway.. 

I sigh ..

I walk out to my room imagining if I let him carry me.. That didn't really help me sleep .. Nothing will anyway

Ugh

----

I wake up and for the first time although I didn't slept last night, I'm too energized and too damn happy that my smile can't go away.. So I freak them out this morning 

I can kiss Gyu if he let me XD

I pour coffee and make some Omelette.. They all stare at me

Gyu: “You making egg ..?” Questioning my motives

Clearly I am bit I still flash him a smile: I can make you some ..?

He shiver and start looking for woohyun 

Sungyeol came to the kitchen and had water and then point at me while looking at Dongwoo: “What's with our broken dance machine ..?”

I made a hahahha face and then glare at him: “Want some ..??”

Yeol: (scared) “You put pepper in it right !!! I am right !!!  You are fooling us into your I'm so kind trap !!! HUH I CANT BE FOOLED BABE,” Pointing at himself “I INVENTED THE GAME”

I shrug: “You can just say no ..”

Then a sleepy kitten walks in.. The blonde hair is too messy I got urge to just go and tidy it up and then maybe mess it up myself

howon stop blushing 

He's walking with eyes closed and Gyu stand in front of him that he pumped him and I could make GYU omelette right now !!!

Gyu snapping his fingers in myung face: “WAKE UP ..!”

Myung wrinkled his eyes and try to open them slowly and then they flutter a bit: “I'm awake ..,” Clearly not

Dongwoo came near me asking for one omelette and I say: “Just 5 more minutes”

And as soon I say that myung head look behind Gyu and his eyes land on me .. And Gyu was saying something and the egg is burning but all I can see.. Is a dimpled face and my heart flutter 

All those damn butterflies is making me sick

Gyu gasp and look at me: “What's this .. ??” Pointing at myung happy silly face and I bite my tongue it's too damn cute, “Why is he like that” Shaking myung shoulder “Yaahhh are you seriously smiling to Hoya !!! Yaaahh wake up ..!!”

He look at me then at Gyu then back at me and then more dimples 

I feel I'm slipping off the floor is kind of slippery 

Gyu looking at my face: “Explain..!”

He's shouting.. I'm smiling .. I don't get myself so what to ing explain 

Hoya: “No omelette for you”

He open his mouth to say something but woohyun cut him off: “So they made up.. Yeeyy isn't that what you wanted ??”

His tone wasn't that happy as if he's questioning Gyu's intention

He look at me to agree and I nod .. See I'm becoming more Myung everyday 

Myung stop smiling but he look at me again.. As if begging my eyes to focus on him.. If only he knows that my eyes are only following him all day like a fool 

Hoya: “We did,” looking at myung now that his face went serious then nodding happily and I fight a laugh, “Right ?” He nod again, “We will try to understand each other” He went serious and then dimple nodding, I sip my coffee “We won't fight” He's shaking his head violently .. Oh dear god I wanna grab him

I laugh at him and he stare lovingly 

Stop making me into an idiot 

They all were gasping 

Gyu : “I'm not sure I'm ok with this”

Woohyun: (snap) “Whyyy !!! Why you are not ok.. You keep worrying at myung’s sake because of Hoya... Now that they are good .. could you please stop this !!”

There's no need to say that Woohyun is feeling way too jelly of Gyu's attention on Myung.. That he left confuse Gyu following him around the house saying: “Yaaahhhhh yaaaaahhhhhhhh ... Don't walk away from me yaaaahhh Nam Wooohyunnnnn”

Eggs burnt... Pan were thrown at basket and myung was laughing.. Yup.. There's no food when that creature is walking around 

We got ready we have schedule .. 

L POV

I walk to the van to see Yeol looking at the window and ignoring me.. He says I'm friended with the enemy after today’s morning announcement.. He clearly don't want me to sit beside him T.T 

Dongwoo wink at me and went to my seat

I don't get Dongwoo lately 

And I'm not liking this 

It's one thing to cause a stupid scene at morning 

But I'm not ready to be next to him.. And they all staring at me as if they are trying to figure us out … If we truly are ok

But 

We might surpass the make up to make out which is why my stomach is feeling sick.. I walk to his seat.. And sink in trying not to look too burden 

I'm sweating for god sake

And I'm glad he's looking at his phone screen but I happen to see it totally by mistake.. Ok fine I'm dying to know why he didn't look up at me and who the hell he's texting 

Ugh

He was writing " you you you you you " to Dongwoo 

Great.. People are judging me and I feel pretty welcomed 

I put the damn earbuds in and close my eyes and Music on.. World off 

But world took one earbud away.. I tilt my head..

And he was looking at me .. While putting it in his ear 

I didn't even move.. Just there staring at him to see what he’s doing next

Silent glare then ..

He smiles ..

I frown..

He chuckles ..

I curse..

I look away ..

He reach up to my chin..

And made me look at him..

Ok now can I kiss him ??? no ?

Ok now ?

Then now? 

How about now !

He must have a clear idea of my shameless thoughts because he wet his dry lips

Ok now ???

Ok  

He made me look away 

And Dongwoo cough 

I don't get Dongwoo these days 

-

Throughout the day we met with fans and sang a bit and basically open up to our next day concert.. Then I had another schedule alone and I barely saw him during the day..

Till it's night

I finished my CF and went back home at 10

I walk in and saw both Dongwoo and Hoya sitting in the living room sofa and laughing 

They stop once I came in.. I walk to the kitchen and grab some water 

Dongwoo says something to Hoya and then went inside their room 

I have no idea why I'm not feeling at ease of their whispers 

I shrug it off and walk to where he was still sitting: “Tomorrow concert day.. Why still awake ?”

He shrug 

I nod as if I got it

I look at the floor mind is seriously clouding barely hearing any sound till a hand pat my shoulder: “Myung.. ??”

I look at him.. Puzzled: “Mmh yeeh ??”

Hoya: “You ok ?”

I nod

He frowns 

He walk then off the sofa and to the kitchen.. I stay there.. I'm tired 

I rub my eyes and walk to where he was heating some milk.. I swallow upon looking at his back 

I don't know what to say

I don't know how to say it 

I just couldn't stop thinking about him all day long 

And he didn't even ask about me 

I felt I'm again in a phase where I want Hyung's attention

And I felt there's a limp choked inside

Because now I'm more in need 

And I don't know if it's ok

so i helplessly say it loud

L:  “Hyung.., is it ok..?”

He stiffens upon hearing my voice but he says nothing.. not even turning behind to look at me..! 

And as If his silent is taken as a yes.. I slip my hand to hold him in a back hug.. And bury my face on his shoulder blades 

He didn't push me away

So I start breathing 

Hoya: “Are you ok ?”

I nod against his skin 

He add: “You look tired “

L: (muffled voice) “I had to act cute all day”

He laugh 

I felt my chest is light and all today tiredness is washed away 

Damn it

How can I pull away from this ?

My hands sneak to his chest and he stiffens and I said: “Now laugh again”

Hoya: “Are you ing serious !!,” Voice amused

I nod 

He shake his head as if saying unbelievable.. And I steal a cheek kiss  

He stone there and I fight the urge to smile at his face

Hoya swallowing, face burnt: “They..” Pause, “they are not fully sleep ..” His eyes closing

I burying my face in his left cheek: “And so”

Hoya: “”

I laugh against his skin and kiss his cheek again again and again: “I've waited all day for this”

He shivers and I like this so much 

L: “What was hyung doing ??” muttering against his cheek

He was currently offline .. 

L: “Hyuuuungg”

Still 

I laugh

L: “Howon”

His eyes were open and they look at me in a way that cause shivers to my spine.. He's burning.. His beat is drumming through his chest.. I can feel it under my skin

Hoya: “That's it .. You're not allowed to get inside the kitchen”

I laugh and he tilt his head to my cheek and whispers: “Now laugh again”

And I did 

And he kissed the dipped of my dimple then mutter: “Don't push me Myung..!”

and how can I ..?

****

so yeeh another happy chap