The first thing Jinki thought when he climbed down the stairs after getting ready to go to Choi Minho's party was that Jonghyun was absolutely breathtaking. That, and that Jinki was going to be miserable for the next few hours.

But of course, he preferred to focus on the positive thought more and caught himself before Jonghyun could notice his wide-eyed gawking. Decked out in simple black slacks and a white button down with a red tie, Jonghyun's masculine frame stood in the center of the living room conversing with Kibum and Taemin.

The younger two were dressed similarly, though Taemin had a suit jacket on to cover himself and provide more heat in case the party were to be held in a cold place. Jinki felt insecure about himself for a moment because the three of them could easily be more handsome than he was, but of course he couldn't let that be obvious and calmly walked down the rest of the stairs.

Taemin was the first to notice him and gaped at the elder's bright-patterned suit for a moment before he turned away. Jinki's alter ego, Onew, was known to have a bright personality matched with bright clothes and a smile that seemed to never fade, so Taemin was used to seeing the elder wearing such clothes even though Jinki's true personality didn't match them.

"What are you wearing?" Kibum eyed his clothes with disinterest, and instead of brushing it off as he usually did, Jinki raised his arms and looked down at himself with a wide smile.

"I think it looks good!" Jinki answered back cheerfully, and as the three of them stood in discomfort at the tone of which Jinki used to speak, Jinki took out his cell phone, "Has manager called?"

"They'll be here in a few minutes." Taemin answered, though he wasn't facing the elder and he certainly wasn't planning to turn to the elder when he was in "Onew mode", because it wasn't the brother he was used to being around.

Jinki would have answered, but had accidentally made eye contact with Jonghyun again, and the younger was staring back at him with his eyes full of disappointment, like he couldn't believe Jinki was trying to be someone else. After Jinki had given him an MP3 player full of the songs he'd worked hard to write with his own thoughts, he could understand how Jonghyun didn't like the person he was currently portraying. When he had given Jonghyun the music player, there had been no formal apologies shared between the two, and the two hadn't even been able to talk about the incident since then, though there probably wasn't anything they could have said about the situation anyway.

"Let's go! The sooner we get there, the sooner we can leave!" Jinki's manager was calling for them the second that he and Taemin's manager entered the house, and Jinki felt a smile curve onto his lips as he heard what the manager was saying about the party, "From this point on until we get back onto the property, remember that Jinki is to be referred to as Onew."

A laugh escaped the elder Lee's lips and he brushed past the managers on his way to the van waiting for them outside. He took his normal seat in the van and took in deep breaths because he had to put on a show and could only hope that the rest of the people there would buy his acting. Not a moment later, the van door opened again, and Jinki slowly looked over to Jonghyun before his eyes froze and refused to look away.

Jonghyun seemed to be just as mesmerized, but was nudged from behind and quickly got into the back row with Taemin and Kibum following him inside. Jinki wanted to know why Jonghyun was staring, of course, but more importantly, Jinki wanted to know why his heart was beating so heavily. Maybe it was because Jonghyun had asked him to be his date to the party, or because Jinki was jealous that Jonghyun was with Taemin after all. Even though Jinki knew he had told Jonghyun to stay with Taemin, and Kibum was with the pair, his heart held some jealousy because he wanted to be a part of it.

But he couldn't be a part of it, and that was obvious to him from the second he had started to get ready for the night. He had to focus on being the Onew that had limitless friends and no worries, and he had to do it while ignoring Choi Minho to the best of his ability. It would be difficult, he knew, since Minho enjoyed being a friendly host and would see Jinki the second the elder stepped onto the property, but that wouldn't stop him from trying.

"Taemin, make sure you stay with Jonghyun and Kibum tonight." Taemin's manager was speaking calmly, but there was a warning in his words that had both Taemin and the bodyguards feel pressured.

"They'll be fine!" Jinki reassured the male, leaning forward in his seat to pat both managers on the shoulder gently, as if to calm them of their worrying. The managers tensed in slight discomfort, since they knew Jinki's true personality was a lot less easy going, but Jinki ignored that and looked around, noticing that they were close to the mansion Minho was throwing his party at.

When they did reach the mansion, Jinki all but threw the door open and hopped out of the vehicle with excitement in his every action. Someone bumped into his back, so Jinki turned back and smiled widely at Kibum.

"You're freaking me out." Kibum told him plainly, and Jinki bit back a laugh as he shrugged and started up the grand staircase into the large ballroom that held the party. 

Jinki waited at the entrance until the younger three men caught up, and with an excited nod, he left them in search for the groups of people he usually spent time with at social events. These men included but weren't limited to Yoseob, Leeteuk, Sunggyu, and a couple of others that weren't as famous but were twice as easy to fake being Onew around. He spent a majority of the time there with them, though his eyes were constantly on the lookout for his brother and the bodyguards, as well as Choi Minho.

There was no sign of the host for a while, though Jinki could see his brother and the two bodyguards at a corner of the ballroom, keeping to themselves. Taemin was always like this at social events, though "Onew" was supposed to be the outgoing one of the two. It made Jinki feel a little better about being at the party, knowing that Taemin finally wasn't alone at such an event and had people to smile and be himself around. The three of them would take a few glances at him from time to time to make sure he was still there and not brooding off somewhere, but Jinki would just wave at them each time and get back to his conversation in hopes that they would lose interest quickly.

Kibum and Taemin usually looked away right as soon as he did, but Jinki always felt Jonghyun's gaze linger on him a while longer than the other two, though the elder pretended not to notice each time. Jinki found himself exhausted by the party just an hour into it, but he knew they weren't able to leave until at least acknowledging Minho's presence, since it was his party, but the elder Lee found himself constantly wondering just where the male could be.

Jinki felt suffocated whenever he was in "Onew mode", so he had the urge to leave the party at least for a short while to get some fresh air, and he did. When he was sure that no one was paying attention to him, Jinki slipped out of the crowd and headed to the garden behind Minho's mansion, taking a well needed deep breath the second he found himself alone.

Back when he had been friends with Minho, he had spent a lot of time at Minho's mansion and often in the garden. Because of this, he felt that he knew Minho's garden better than the owner himself. It was an expensive garden with archways and a gazebo in the distance with a small pond and lights that lit up the entire space. It was breathtaking and always brought a genuine smile to Jinki's lips, like just then.

The peace wasn't even broken off when he heard footsteps behind him, because even without looking, Jinki knew who it was. Jonghyun walked forward until they were side by side and looked up at the elder, his breath seemingly taken right out of his body at the peaceful and just plain beautiful expression Jinki was wearing as they stood there.

"Did you get tired of the party too?" It wasn't his forced excitement speaking, and certainly not his almost monotone, but a gentle mix of all the emotions he felt when he was with Jonghyun.

"I didn't want to be there if you weren't there." Jonghyun's voice was soft, and Jinki almost couldn't hear it over the sound of the water moving in the pond, but he did, and his smile only grew as a result.

"You're supposed to be guarding Taemin." Jinki reminded him, though he didn't sound or even feel any anger towards the younger male, but relief that they could actually find time to be together.

"Kibum can take care of him." Jonghyun's voice didn't hold any resentment towards Kibum anymore, and for that, Jinki felt more relieved and nodded gently as he continued walking towards the gazebo.

Jonghyun trailed after him a few steps later, and eventually, the two of them made their way onto the white gazebo looking over the rest of the serene garden. Jinki leaned over the railing of the gazebo, his eyes fixated on the never ending flowers that were swaying under the gentle moonlit breeze.

"Jinki." Jonghyun's voice wasn't surprising to him in the slightest, but flowed gently along with the sound of the water, "Why do you pretend-"

"To be someone I'm not?" Jinki completed for him, and looked up at the moon with a thoughtful smile on his face before he turned back to the ground, "Because I wish I was more like Onew. Energetic, friendly, worry-less-"

"You don't need to be like him." Jonghyun interrupted, and Jinki slowly turned to him to see what he'd say about the elder, "You're perfect as you are."

That had Jinki almost choking on his saliva, because he certainly wasn't used to being called nice things, but  when Jonghyun looked back at him, it felt as if he couldn't speak at all. Jonghyun's eyes were gentle and full of admiration, and just one glance at it had Jinki's heart fluttering in his chest.

He didn't really know what he was doing when he leaned down and pressed his lips against Jonghyun's. Maybe it was because the lights given off by the gazebo made him look almost angelic, and the smile on his face had spoken right into the elder's heart. Maybe it was because Jonghyun willingly chose to be with him instead of with Taemin and Kibum inside of the mansion. Maybe it was because Jonghyun had seen a glimpse of the real Jinki from the music he'd listened to and still wanted to be around him.

He did know, however, that he enjoyed the feeling of Jonghyun's lips against his own, even if they were kissing for only a moment before the elder pulled back and headed to the party. It wasn't like he was embarrassed or anything, or like he hated the kiss. It felt more than natural to kiss Jonghyun, and with that one kiss alone, Jinki felt replenished of his energy and was ready to face the party once more. Jonghyun jogged forward until they were side by side and the two of them walked into the mansion together, though Jinki could tell his own smile was mirroring the smile that was now on Jonghyun's face.

Smiles that were whiped awat when they walked into the mansion and glanced over to Kibum and Taemin only to see the figure talking to them casually. Just by the way Jinki tensed, Jonghyun knew who it was, and before Jinki could even think about what to do, Jonghyun walked forward and took his place beside the two younger men, who seemed grateful for his presence. His arrival perked Minho's interest, and the tall male turned his head and smiled when he saw Jinki standing there.

"Jinki," Minho crossed the space between them before Jinki could move a muscle, and Jinki could only feel his body tense more in response, "You made it!"

"We'll be leaving soon." It was Taemin's voice that cut in, because he knew Jinki wouldn't be able to converse with Minho freely after what had happened between them.

Minho pretended that he hadn't even heard Taemin speaking, which was a surprise for Jinki since he had actually confessed to caring more about the younger in the past, "Wow, Jinki, you've become so much more handsome."

Jinki held himself back from rolling his eyes because he should have remembered how greasy Minho was, but he again wasn't able to reply to the tall male as he was tugged behind Jonghyun in a protective manner, "If there's something you'd like to say to Onew, please do so through us."

The elder Lee felt both grateful for the barrier and a little embarrassed, since he was supposed to be outgoing and friendly, and if anyone else saw them, it wouldn't look very good on his part, but he certainly wasn't as taken aback as Minho was, who raised his eyebrows with all amusement drained from his face, "What are you supposed to be?"

Kibum nudged Jonghyun to the side slightly, though Jonghyun was still holding onto Jinki and ended up moving the elder in the process, "I apologize sir, but you are making our clients uncomfortable, so please leave before we use force to make you leave."

"Jinki, we need to talk." Minho's eyes were now focused on Jinki, staring at him with a look mixed with desparation, frustration, and just plain longing.

"Then book an appointment." Kibum snapped back, his eyes narrowed at the tall male before he turned with a hair flip and walked off with Taemin following him, "We're done here."

Jinki stared at Minho for a little longer with his chest constricting in pain at all the memories Minho had given him, but when he felt his hand being tugged on, he glanced down to see Jonghyun was holding his hand, and that his feet had already started moving without him even realizing it. His eyes then slowly roamed upward to Jonghyun's muscular back and to the back of the younger's head, where they remained until the four of them reached their van to go home.

Just before Jonghyun climbed into the van, he turned and looked up at Jinki, disappearing into the van a moment later with the elder slowly climbing into it as well. The entire ride home, and even up unto the point where he was going to enter his room to retire for the night, however, he hadn't realized he never let go of Jonghyun's hand; because that's how natural it felt.