"Kids!! It's time for breakfast! Who are late gonna do the dishes......Kahi unnie!! Help me woke this kids up. They never listen to me..." That voice who rung the dorm every morning is gone......After School now not like before. No more laughter, smile, fooling around, kids who are fighting over Jung Ah breakfast, no more Jung Ah nagging voice to our mischievous lizzy and nana who love to stole her banana....No more Jung Ah in our dorm. Sorrow life. I looked down, as my tears fell right to the ground. 

"Don't pretend like you care about me! I know you must be happy when I have to graduated later right? So you will get more attention when I left. I am nobody in After School. Even now, you already get all spotlight on you. You don't want other member to grow right?" Jung Ah word keep replaying in my thought. I am upset with it. But somehow I feel so guilty. She have to graduate because of me? I can't bear with it any longer. If this the reason why she hate me, I'll take her place. I'll be the one who being graduate. I'll do anything to make her happy even it's mean my journey will end here. Even it mean I will no longer be able to be there for these kids to give them hug when they cry, scold them with their mischievousness, fooling around with them, laughing, shed our tears together.....I will do it for you Kim Jung Ah.

I'm gonna tell her about this and make her stay in hope she will forgive me. I quickly find my phone and call Jung Ah number, but she doesn't pick up her phone and I try it again, almost 15 times before she finally answer me.

 

 

I : "Jung Ah...It's me Ka...."

Jung Ah : "Why did you call me?!" She cut me off.

I : "How are you lately? Are you doing fine?"

Jung Ah : "Emm.."

I : "Did you eat you lunch yet?"

Jung Ah : "Emm.." I got more worried with her one word reply, and that wasn’t even a word. *sigh*

I : "I......have something to tell you." I stuttered.

Jung Ah : "But I have nothing to talk with you! I'll hung up now....."

I : "Jung ah! wait......please listen to me. I really do have something important to tell you.."

Jung Ah : "Emm..I..." *hesitate*

I : "Please Jung Ah... You can think of this as my last favor for you. I promise wont disturb you after this."

Jung Ah : "Okay then...what it is?"

I : "But not here.."

Jung Ah : "Huh!? So...?"

I : "Can we met somewhere?"

Jung Ah : "I don't think I can" She answer me coldly.

I : "Jung Ah yaa.....this is for the last time. I promise you."

Jung Ah : "Emm......Okay then!"

I : "Really??" I couldn't believe she just say yes to meet me. "I'll pick you up at 8 and..... tut tut tut.." She just hung up the phone befofe I could say anything. *sigh*

 

 

 

Once the night arrived, I got dressed. I couldn't hide my happiness to see Jung Ah again after a month we being apart.

"Kahi unnie! Why are you so happy?" Nana looked at me. "Ahh nothing dear." I smiled to this blonde girl. "Unnie, are you going out?" Lizzy rush to me. "Ermm yeahh..." "Where? With who? When are you gonna come home?" She asked me non-stop. This maknae so cute, I looked at her and smiled. "Why are you asked me like a private investigator huh??" I pinch her nose gently. "I'm going out with..." Wait! I can't tell them. They must be sad if I mention Jung Ah name now. "With who?? Do you finally have a boyfriend? Hahaha" Nana mocking me. I sent her death stares. "I'm sorry unnie, just kidding" She look down on the floor. "I'm going out with Dambi. Make sure don't mess the dorm or else I'm gonna kill you guys one by one!!"

"Geez! We are not kids anymore unnie.." Lizzy stick her tongue out to me. "Really?? So who are always cry at night because scared of darkness??" I let out slight chuckled. "Yahh Kahi unnie!! That because....err..I...just.....just forget it!! Stop teasing me." "Arasso.. Unnie have to go now, please take care of yourself okay guys?" I put on my coat. "OKAY!!!" They shout to me. "Guys, I'm not deaf!" .. "Sorry hehe... By the way unnie, can you brought dukbokki when you come home?" This Lizzy never forget about her dukbokki. "Aigoo...arasso Lizzy ahh." I pinch her cheeks and headed out. 

 

 

 

 

I drove by Jung Ah house and called her phone. "Hello....I'm already outside.." "Okay I'll be there.."  She hung up the phone.

"Kahi unnie...Long time didn't see you. How are you unnie?" Jung Ah sister greet me. "I'm doing good, how about you HyunSoo ahh? Seems like you are more busy than I am haha" "Hahaha not like that Kahi unnie, but yeahh kinda....by the way, where are you going with Jung Ah unnie?" She said as she offer me for drinks. "Well...just wanna hanging out with her ..."

A few mins later Jung Ah was out and she just walked past us to the car and sit in the passenger seat without talk a word. "Err... HyunSoo, unnie got to go now. See you later okay.." I walked to the car. I stared at her for a minute and then I turned the car on. It's an awkward moment for us. Nobody talked. Just silent. Jung Ah stuck her head out of the window and let the wind brush against her face. I'd try to start conversation with her.

 

I : "You know what, Nana and Lizzy keep fighting to sleep in your bed every night. But Nana always lost to Lizzy. You know how's Lizzy right? Haha they are so funny. I really don't know what to do with those kids haha........and Raina, she's keep on trying to make breakfast exactly what you used did for us, but always get criticism from Lizzy hahaha.....and Eyoung....." Okay!! It doesn't work. She didn't respond me at all. She keep facing other way. *sigh*

Jung Ah : "Where are we going actually?" Huh?! did she just talk to me just now??

I : "Well...let see. Do you have anywhere to go? I'll take you there.

Jung Ah : "I don't know.." *continue to look outside*

I : *sigh* "Arasso~" Now back to normal, silent and awkward.

 

We finally reached at the Han River. We got out of the car and Jung Ah was shivering because of cold weather. I gently put my coat on her. "It's okay...I'm..." "It's cold here, and you are easily get sick. Just put it on!" I said and she just obey me. 

 

Jung Ah : "So what are you going to tell me?"

I : "Let just walk for awhile..." I looked at her but she are facing other way refused to look back at me.

Jung Ah : "Make it fast unnie!"

I : "Hurm I'll buy hot choco first..it's too cold here...you want some?" I offer her but she just shook her head. "Ermm okay, wait for me..I'll be back soon." I fought back my tears as I walk to cafe nearby. It was hard to keep a smiling face when Jung Ah act so cold with me, but I kept trying. "Here one for you.." I handed her a cup of hot chocolate.

Jung Ah : "But I don't asked for it."

I : "Oh really?? I thought you want it so I buy 2. So... what I'm gonna do with it? I already buy it anyways. I can't have it both. It's too much for me. Should I throw it away then?" I glanced to her.

Jung Ah : "Hmm give it to me.." Yes!! That's my real intention actually. I handed her hot chocolate as I sat next to her. We sat down near the river, countless things were running in my head. I don't know how to start conversation with her.

I : "It such a beautiful night right? Don't we look like a couple here haha..." Awkward laugh from me when she didn't respond. "I still remember when the first time we came here around 5 month ago. You said to me that you really love this place and keep asked me to came here again and again. But we never could make it because busy with our schedule. But now we are here! Don't you like it?" I glanced a look at her. "Ohh do you remember that you are crying because fall down when you try to catch butterflies. I thought that time it's hurt you so much when I see blood on your knee. It scared me, but you said that you are crying because afraid it will leave a scar on your beautiful leg. Hahaha you are so cute! Do you remember that?"

Jung Ah :"No.." Just one word out from her. Fail again with conversation "Can you told me why you asked me out? If you don't have anything, better I go now." She stood up.

I : "Wwaaiittt...!!" I pull her hand. "Actually...I.....just wanna tell you that I will leave After School, so you don't have to graduate. I'll take your place. You can stay.." I forced my smile to her.

Jung Ah : "What??!!" She looked at me in shock.

I : "I know that's what you want. I'll talk with Sung Soo oppa about this. I just hope you don't hate me. I want to be with you like before. I miss my old sister, my old Kim Jung Ah...not Jung Ah who are in front of me now......"

Jung Ah : "Why are you doing that??" I could see she hold back her tears. "You don't have to do that unnie!"

I : "But I can't bear to see you like this. I know you are mad with me because of this right?"

Jung Ah : "It not like what you think.....I....I...just...." she stuttered "I have to go now!!!" She stood up and leave me. I'd tried to chase after her but it's too late because she already hop in the taxi.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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After that night, I've never see Jung Ah anymore. She is nowhere to be found. She never come to practice, never attend any event or schedule. She just gone! I've tried to find her, but useless. Nobody know where Jung Ah go. Not even her family. "Park Kahi.." Suddenly I feel someone poke my shoulders. I turn my head back and saw Sung Soo oppa standing behind me.

 

I : "Ahh oppa! You are startle me.." I hit his arm gently.

Sung Soo : "What are you thinking about? I’ve been calling your name for 5 minutes straight, but you just ignore me. Something wrong with your ears? Getting deaf now? Hahaha.." He teased me.

I : "Geez~ By the way, what are you doing here oppa??" He looked at me awkward.

Sung Soo : "Don't you think I am the one who supposed to asked you that? This is my office right? My company and I work here. So it not so surprising if I was here, but you..what are you doing here?" My face turn to red as he say that.

I : "Hehe sorry oppa.."

Sung Soo : "Why are you here by the way?"

I : "Ermm can I talk something to you oppa?" I looked at him.

Sung Soo : "You just did.."

I : "Yah oppa! I'm serious...geez~"

Sung Soo : "Okay okay I'm sorry hehehe...so what is it?"

I : "I....want to leave After School...I don;t think I can continue it anymore.....*deep sigh*

Sung Soo : "What??!!" *shock* "You too??!!"

I : *clueless* "What you mean..?" 

Sung Soo : "Jooyeon and Uie did come here and said the same thing like what you just did. If you guys leave, what will happen to After School? I know why you guys take this desicion....but I think you guys are misunderstanding situation now. Jung Ah graduation is not from our decision. She asked for it herself. She want to leave After School. We can't do anything about that. And one more thing, you guys should stop looking for her, she's gone!"

I : "She's what?? What you mean......she's........" I couldn't continue my word. I feel like being hit by a truck.. What he mean by she's gone......???