It was already past lunch as Jiyong stumbled into the kitchen the next day.
A sunday, so his attendance to help wasn't needed for once.

Daesung pressed a finger against his lips, signalling him to be quiet before continuing to load the dishwasher.

"Had a rough night?"

When the younger only nodded he knew that something had happened but he didn't dare to dig down any further.
If something bothered him, Daesung would always tell him if he felt ready.

"What about you?"

The man in question shrugged his shoulders and leaned against the counter, next to Daesung.

"Dae, I'm so confused", he confessed.

"Want to talk about it?"

Jiyong air into his lungs before opening up his heart.

As he ended his talk his friend kept quiet for some time.

And that's what he loved him for. He never immediately responded, he always thought about it a bit.

"You should just talk with him about it, what's the big deal?"

"Oh, did I forget to add that he ignores me again?", his sarcastic side surfaced while he paced through the whole kitchen, "He ing messes with me all evening long, talking about dates and doing something to me and the next day he simply looks past me!"

"Maybe he's insecure."

"Please! Have you seen him? A man like him should not have a single drop of insecurity inside of him."

"Jiyong, stop and look at me", he grabbed his friend's shoulders tightly and shook him, "You're forgetting where he's from, aren't you? He's not like us, and probably never will be. You need to be patient."

Jiyong huffed and mumbled a small, "I hate it when you're right."

"Grandma, have you seen Seunghyun?"

Miso stopped her work to look at her grandson, taking in his appearance from head to toe before turning away again.

"In his room. But I don't think you should go there, he doesn't want to see you."

"Are you sure..?", Jiyong gnawed on his lower lip out of anxiety.

"I brought him lunch earlier since he didn't appear for breakfast and he told me."

He let silence overcome them for a few moments before exhaling loudly, "Grandma, about your flowers..."

"Don't bother, Seunghyun already told me."

"Oh...I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry, I shouldn't have let him drink so much, also-.."

"You haven't visited your mother in a long time."

Miso's statement shocked him and his throat dried out.

Jiyong knew what she had in mind.

And for the first time in six months he willingly agreed to do it.

"Stop at your apartment on the way home. I ended the contract, empty it before Friday or they'll throw your stuff away."

Jiyong's breath hitched in his throat, body breaking out in sweat as he forced his feet to carry him up the hill, the snowy ground impeding every step.

He was not wearing enough and too much at the same time and by the time he had reached the spot his face was flushed red, heart beating against his rib cage severely.

"Somewhere around here..."

He mumbled as he searched through the rows, each of them seemed endless.

A small sigh of relief slipped past his lips, a little white cloud rising because of it.

No thud was audible as his backpack landed on the floor.

He shivered lightly as his knees sunk into the snow, bringing him into a kneeing position, face to face with her.

"Hey, mom. I'm alone today, Miso still had work to do in the garden before all her precious flowers die from frostbite...but she would've loved to tag along...to see you again."

Jiyong exhaled shakily and fought back his tears, 'Talking to a grave stone just isn't the same...'

"I'm sorry for not coming earlier but school has been busy lately and then I finally got some time off, because of holidays you know, and I met somebody. He's a refugee from the North. His name is Seunghyun, you would have liked him, I swear.

It's just...I don't know what to do, mom. I know that I messed up my last relationship because I rushed it but that was a guy who was familiar with, well, everything around here. And Seunghyun...just isn't.

He's so..."

Jiyong smiled into nowhere and told his beloved mother every little silly thing the older had done since they'd met.

He was still beaming as he finished before turning blue again, "I really want this to work and I sincerely wish that you'd be here right now. I love you, mom, and I always will."

He kissed the ice cold stone goodbye and retrieved his backpack who was by then covered with a thin layer of snow.

Although his mind wanted to leave his body refused so he forced his head to stay too.

His eyes landed on the spot where his mother laid, only a few feet beneath him.

"That was sweet."

Jiyong caught sight of Seunghyun from the corner of his eyes, who was trembling even though he was shielded by a warm coat.

"How long have you been standing there?"

The older tried wriggling his toes and frowned as his attempt failed, "A bit too long, I think."

"Why are you even here?", Jiyong's voice was distant as he spoke.

"You forgot the key to your apartment and Miso sent me after you."

The younger didn't answer, only motioned him to follow like he did most of the time.

He walked with fast and steady steps through the cemetry before turning around.

Seunghyun was far behind, really far.

So far that Jiyong figured out that something must be wrong.

"What's wrong with you?", he called out while approaching him.

He heard Seunghyun sniff, "I can't move my toes properly, I'm sorry."

"You're so stupid..."

Jiyong wrapped an arm around his waist to support him as they moved along.

Seunghyun didn't respond, he only smiled gently as his hand came up to cover Jiyong's which hugged him.

Jiyong blessed himself for having forgotten to turn the heating off the last time he had been there.

Thanks to that his whole apartment was pleasantly warm and cozy.

He directed his guest into the living room, placed him on the couch and covered him in all the blankets he could scrape up.

"Miso said you are going to move...", Seunghyun sounded sad and a little bit disappointed even.

Jiyong fully tucked him in and slid in next to him, "I'll move to the shelter, away from here."

"May I ask why?"

"No", came the immediate answer followed by a small apology, "I mean...it's still hard for me to say, sorry."

The older man stayed quiet for some time until he squirmed around and pleaded, "Please remove a few blankets, I'm dying here."

"First you almost freeze to death, now it's suddenly too warm", Jiyong nagged as he obeyed but quickly shut up as he was pulled beneath the warmth of the fluffy blanket.

"I wasn't able to hug you before."

Seunghyun nuzzled his neck and whispered into his hair, "I want to thank you for last night again. But I apologize for throwing up and ruining everything. I would have loved to continue it...in your bed."

The butterflies returned and Jiyong's whole body heated up, 'He can't be serious, right? This would be too good to be true.'

"Are you alright...?", Seunghyun's breath ghosted across his ear shell, his tongue coming out to it slightly, "Your whole body is so...tense."

', what a tease.'

Jiyong jumped as a still cold hand slipped under his shirt, traced patterns across his stomach before it encircled an already half-hard .

"I ha-...have a bed here as well."

Seunghyun, who was along his neck by then, stopped his work and whispered hoarsly, "Then what are we waiting for?"